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You guys. I think my house is totally haunted by malevolent spirits. People keep falling down the stairs. I fell down the basement stairs last spring and gave myself a concussion (I went to work anyway). My mom fell down the same stairs in May and broke her ankle in two places (she had it fixed and went to Mexico anyway). Friday night, I fell down the stairs that go from the loft to the first floor and broke my big toe (I went to a bar anyway. I did not take painkillers that night though).
While some of you non-believers might say, “Hey, idiot, stop wearing socks on your wood stairs,” I prefer to think that evil beings lurk in my 1923 house and randomly push people down the stairs – we DO live across the street from a cemetery. My husband tested this theory by running up and down the stairs about four times in a row, but nothing pushed him. Perhaps it’s an evil spirit that doesn’t like women.
Here’s what happened: I fell down the stairs while he was taking the dogs out. He came in and I was sitting on a chair with my foot up on the ottoman, staring at my toe sticking toward my body at a 90 degree angle. “I think I broke my toe,” I said.
“Well, they don’t do much for broken toes,” he told me, and bent down to look at it. He touched the bottom of my foot with his finger. “Uh… does that hurt?”
“YES.”
“I think that’s your bone.” So that sort of changed things. He carried me to the car and we drove to the hospital; he carried me inside and I plopped my foot down on the desk of the woman doing admissions. “I think I broke my toe,” I told her.
From there on out, I was kind of the freak show of the hospital. People would do a double take when they walked by the room where I was waiting for the doctor to fix me. A cop stopped in when he saw the strange angle of my toe and he and my husband had a long discussion about dislocated digits. They compared old injuries. Meanwhile I sat there enjoying the drugs they were pumping into me.
Anyway, suffice it to say I learned some interesting things throughout this whole ordeal. Among them:
• When the broken bone sticks out through the skin, it’s called an open fracture. Apparently this is rare (yay me!)
• Usually you only need ibuprofen for a broken toe. Me? I’m on percocet.
• The medical term for the big toe is hallux.
• Most people’s second toe is shorter than their big toe. Mine is not. This is called “Mitten foot”.
• Women have about four times as many foot problems as men. This might be due to the structure of high heels. That’s not going to stop me from wearing them, though – I love shoes.
This isn’t me, but this video essentially shows what the doctor did to my toe to get it back in place. I’m not going to lie; it was kind of cool.
OK, now it’s time to make me feel better about my stupidity. Tell me about your freak accidents and ridiculous injuries!
Comments (71)
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“Most people’s second toe is shorter than their big toe. Mine is not. This is called “Mitten foot”.”
it’s actually called Morton’s Toe, named for Dudley Joy Morton (he actually has more than one foot disorder named for him – not sure if that’s an accomplishment though?)
little known fact – the Statue of Liberty has Morton’s Toe
:)
posted by Clotho on 12-19-2007 at 2:00 pm
Last summer, I too fell down the stairs. I believe I broke my pinky toe on the left foot, but I got lucky in that it wasn’t an open break (sorry Stacy!)…my foot hurt like the dickens though for a couple of days after, and my toe and surrounding area of the foot turned a nice puffy purply color. Half a year later, I still can’t move my pinky toe like I used to be able to, and wearing pinchy shoes can be uncomfortable now…(but like Stacy said…cute shoes!). And as for the 2nd toe being longer than your big toe…I was always told that it meant you were a princess! But then again, I was a bit coddled.
As for malevolent beings causing accidents – my sophomore year at Univ. of Iowa, I swear to goodness there was a ghost living in my room – I would wake up with all sorts of weird shaped bruises up and down my arms and legs (and I’m not a sleepwalker).
posted by Lindsay D on 12-19-2007 at 2:00 pm
eeeeks – I forgot to wish you speedy healing!!
posted by Clotho on 12-19-2007 at 2:02 pm
I fell down my wooden stairs My house was built in 1923, too. (Maybe they should recall stairs built in 1923)
Instead of injuring my toe, I fell the entire length of the staircase on my butt. The poor people at the bottom of the stairs watched, waiting for me to catch myself, but it just didn’t happen.
I broke my tailbone. The Dr couldn’t go anything other than offer pain pills. I had to sit on a donut cushion for weeks!
I have a feeling I will receive socks with little grippies on the bottom for Christmas this year.
posted by stephanie on 12-19-2007 at 2:02 pm
I worked at a bookstore for many years as a manager. One night I was in the cash office after close counting the tills. It had been a long long day so I decided to have a little fun by rolling around the little office in the chair to get from the safe to the desk (weeeee!!!) I pushed off pretty hard and SMACK, hit the little indent under my ankle bone on the corner of a hanging filing cabinet. The next day I was in a lot of pain so I visited the workers comp doctor, he basically accused me of faking and told me to take some Tylenol.This was a Friday. I toughed out two 8 hour crazy Holiday season shifts on my feet, because the doctor said nothing was wrong and I didn’t want to be a wuss. By Sunday I was in so much pain I couldn’t do anything but lay in bed and cry. Monday I visited my own doctor (at my expense) and learned that I had “burst” my tendon, and there was a big blood blister on it rubbing against the small bone next to it. He said I would have been fine if I had stayed off my feet for a few days, but since I did so much walking (and the tendon did so much rubbing), I did permanent damage to it. I am the only person I know who can say I hurt myself on office furniture.
posted by Melissa on 12-19-2007 at 2:05 pm
What a GREAT article! Yeah, I guess I love other people’s pain!
posted by Renee Walker on 12-19-2007 at 2:08 pm
This past October, just before my school went on fall break, my right lung collapsed. The medical term is spontaneous pneumothorax, and as the name implies, it can appear for no apparent reason.
The pain started when I woke up, it hurt to breath or move my right side. I went to both of my classes, worked on an English paper, and took a nap before deciding to visit the campus health center.
I had a thoracic vent put in, and spent a few days at the hospital expecting to be discharged before they told me I needed surgery to remove part of my lung. 10 days in the hospital, and my dad flew out from California to Chicago to be with me for the surgery.
My freshman year of college has been an interesting adventure, to say the least!
posted by Will on 12-19-2007 at 2:12 pm
I dislocated and fractured my kneecap playing two hand touch football. Let me tell you, your leg looks odd with the kneecap on the side. The strangest part was that it didn’t hurt, until I got up. Then it felt like I got punched in the stomach. The next day at the hospital, (I had gone to urgent care the day it happened) I was put in a cast from ankle to upper thigh. Thing still slips out from time to time and I have seriously hurt my knee two other times.
posted by Useless_fact_fairy on 12-19-2007 at 2:13 pm
Two winters ago, I was walking into my friend’s bathroom with my socks on, and for some reason my foot slid out from under me when I stepped off the carpet and onto the linoleum. The right fourth toe bent up underneath my foot, and as I cursed in every form imaginable, my toe started to turn purple. My friends all had a good laugh, and we proceeded to watch movies as planned. A few hours later I took my sock off to find that my whole foot was purple and that particular toe had turned a frightening bluish-gray. They still thought I was being dramatic though, so I had to drive myself to the hospital for x-rays. Sure enough, it was broken, and I spent the next four weeks lumbering through the snow across campus with a special boot to keep my foot straight, not even with so much as a “Sorry-we-laughed-at-your-broken-toe”. Good times.
posted by bas on 12-19-2007 at 2:19 pm
I am the biggest klutz EVER. My favorite example:
It was my senior year of college, and the Friday before Memorial Day weekend (we were on the quarter system). I was walking with a friend near the student union after my 9am class when as my friend would say I “dropped off the radar”. I hit a cracked part of sidewalk where the tree roots were protruding. I managed to sprain my ankle so bad that I had to spend all day in the Student Health Center in a wheelchair getting x-rays and talking to doctors. I skinned my knees, my palms and since I was wearing sandals my toes. I spent 5 days on crutches and 2 weeks in a walking cast. It sucked. My one saving grace was that I graduated to an air cast/brace by the time I had to walk for graduation.
I am the only person I know who has sprained her ankle just walking down the sidewalk …
posted by kt on 12-19-2007 at 2:23 pm
Here are a couple of my best injuries, though no open fractures, darn!
Dislocated my right ankle performing a slide tackle in soccer (kid fell on my leg with the ball under it). Doc said it would have been better to break it, THANKS!
Hurt my left ankle running to second base. Basically my toe caught the base and not only turned my ankle 90 degrees to the right but also rolled it so my ankle bone hit the ground.
Needless to say, I have some bad ankles. I also have bad knees that are double-jointed (I can dislocate them). I bend but I don’t break.
posted by Dusty on 12-19-2007 at 2:24 pm
When I was 10 fell out of a tree and broke my elbow across the growth plate. The doctor was worried that my arm might not grow as long as the other one, but luckily it did. However, it does now hyper extend so that when my arm is “unbent,” it actually bends in the “wrong” direction. It’s fairly slight, but makes a great party trick.
I also once broke my own finger by stepping on it while playing volleyball.
I’ve broken two toes on my left foot, the one next to the pinkie toe twice, and the middle one once.
I’m currently nursing a chipped elbow (chipped by banging it hard on the corner of my desk.) It hurt like crazy the first few weeks, but now only hurts when something rubs against it (no tight shirt sleeves for me!) You can actually push the bone chip around a little, which is super cool/icky.
Yes, I’m pretty much a walking disaster!
posted by frumpiefox on 12-19-2007 at 2:24 pm
KT,
Per my first post I have very loose joints. So, I sometimes sprain my ankles walking on level ground. I’m used to it so it usually doesn’t hurt more than a couple of minutes.
I feel your pain though (pun intended).
posted by Dusty on 12-19-2007 at 2:29 pm
When I was in Jr High, my brother turned 16 and got his license. He, my best friend and I decided it would be a good idea to ride on the trunk of the car while he rode around. I fell off and broke my wrist.
I told my mom we were playing tag, I finally fessed up the night before my wedding.
posted by Witty Nickname on 12-19-2007 at 2:29 pm
A couple of years ago I was helping my best friend move and part of her big metal bed frame dropped on my big toe. It dropped me to the floor and I couldn’t walk for a few days. I kept it elevated and took ibuprofen but the swelling didn’t go down. Plus, I still had to go to work at the restaurant I worked at. Luckily I worked in the kitchen so I was able to take my shoe off and stand on a towel since the shoe made the pain worse. After about a week one of my friends who was studying to be an EMT came over to check it out for me. He ended up having to heat up a needle and poke through my toenail into the skin to drain out all the fluid. It hurt like hell but the swelling went down and I was able to walk normal again. My toenail still fell off though, which always sucks.
posted by Marta on 12-19-2007 at 2:31 pm
Broke the same pinkie toe the same way twice – by running for the phone! Missed the phone, slammed the bottom corner of the dresser between the pinkie toe and its neighbor toe with the force of a placekicker. Did it once in the 90’s, did the same dang thing 15 years later. Not a quick learner.
Torn the ligaments in my thumb while I was DUSTING. Don’t try to buff a table to a mirror like shine. Tried to get all fancy with my high spped, high force buffing, caught the edge of my thumb on the edge of the table and riiiiiiip. The pain amazed me in its intensity! Then I felt like the complete uncoordinated eeediot I undoubtedly am.
posted by JaneM on 12-19-2007 at 2:34 pm
I swung a T-Ball bat at a basketball midair. I was holding the bat with one hand like a genius and when it hit the basketball it bounced right back into my face scratching my Cornea and giving me a mild concussion.
Brilliant story to tell people if you want to lose their respect immediately.
posted by Aneil on 12-19-2007 at 2:34 pm
Ouch! I think I felt everyone’s injuries. Healthy recovery to all.
THIS IS A TRUE STORY. I SWEAR ON MY ORIGINAL STAR WARS POSTER:
I am one of those people that stress usually does not effect. I think I’m too lazy to let it, honestly. However, at the end of September, I had three major stressful events in my life. For a few nights I had been having very strange dreams and very active dreams. On a Sunday morning I had been dreaming that I was driving down the road and was trying to take a drink of water from a cup and kept hitting myself in the forehead with it. I woke up in excruciating pain with blood gushing from my nose. I had my cordless phone in my hand and apparently had been beating myself in the nose with it as I kept trying to drink water in my dream. After stuffing my nose with tissue, I went to the hospital. The doctor who daw me did not believe me and gave me a pamphlet on domestic violence. When she handed it to me I said, “I’m totally serious. And, by the way, I’m the one who brought you those pamphlets.” Broken nose by cordless phone.
posted by Nola on 12-19-2007 at 2:36 pm
When I was a kid, I was watching TV (Transformers) while sitting backwards in a metal folding chair… rocking it back and forth on two legs. Just for good measure, I had my legs through the hole in the back of the chair. Sure enough, the legs of the chair slipped out from under me and I face-planted on the floor, breaking my nose.
posted by Kevin on 12-19-2007 at 2:36 pm
p.s. Speedy recovery to you!
posted by JaneM on 12-19-2007 at 2:37 pm
I also jammed my big toe running down the stairs. Still clicks when I bend it. Posting again to wish you a speedy recovery!
A very safe and happy holiday (or vacation if you aren’t celebrating) to all who posted!
posted by Useless_fact_fairy on 12-19-2007 at 2:41 pm
I JUST broke my toe on Friday! I was walking (in socks) and smacked my foot against the wall. I broke my ‘ring’ toe. I KNEW the second it happened. It turned all purple and puffy and weird looking. then the top part of my foot swelled and got all purpley looking. Hurts like heck.
About 4 years ago I managed to get a freaking spiral fracture of my middle toe (same foot- apparently I am right footed) Spiral fractures are apparently pretty spectacular for a toe- normally they are too small for spiraling- but not my freak toes. They are very long. That fracture caused the toe to bend sideways at a right angle. Ouchy.
posted by QT314159265 on 12-19-2007 at 2:48 pm
The spring of my junior year I had my jaw fractured by a line-drive ball hit during an intramural softball game. I know I should’ve just ducked but the base was ridiculously close to the home plate and I hadn’t played softball since 4th grade. Anyways, I went to the ER right away where my friend had to translate for me since I couldn’t really talk very well. I ended up having my jaw wired shut for just about 6 weeks. During that time I got pretty creative with my blender (everything I ate had to fit through a straw) and ended up losing about 30 pounds. I also had to carry around a little notepad to talk to people since my ventriloquist skills weren’t very good. Definitely a memorable experience!
posted by Andrea on 12-19-2007 at 2:49 pm
i discovered one day that there is a *reason* they put guards on hedge trimmers. i was nearly done with the lilac bush, but there was one stubborn branch that kept slipping back, away from the trimmer. i reached out, grabbed the errant branch and moved the trimmer over to cut it off. inexplicably, my left middle finger just got sucked into the trimmer and i took off most of the tip of my finger and the tip of the finger was broken, too. it took 18 stitches and i still don’t have much for sensation in that finger tip. the doctor put a huge splint on the finger and then wrapped my hand up with gauze and instructed me to keep it elevated. my huge white hand with the even bigger white middle finger flipped a lot of people off on the way home . . .
posted by shelly on 12-19-2007 at 2:51 pm
My experiences with fractures are limited to minor rollings of my ankle, but I did incur a nasty puncture wound two years back.
As a student in the employ of my university, I was clambering around the rafters of a building with a reputation for proving Murphy’s Law. While crawling toward the far side of the building, I slipped from the rafters and landed — on my feet, thankfully — on the pitch roof below (yes, the building had multiple roofs, each built over its predecessor).
I stood there, feet planted, arms upon the two adjacent rafters, in a pose resembling a crucifixion. I’d jammed my right arm, just above where the elbow meets the tricep, onto the protruding corner of some device — it looked to be one part bed-o’-nails, one part cheese grater — used to strengthen joints where rafters meet their crossbeams. I’m sure it has an actual name.
Long story short: my arm impaled upon the inch-long protruding triangle, I took a deep breath, yanked it upward, and quickly descended, making my way toward the university’s health clinic. I remained calm the entire time — glorious, wonderful adrenaline be praised — until the nurse started talking about stitches, whereupon the room got kinda shaky and I asked to lie down. Sewing up skin freaks me out.
posted by Willie on 12-19-2007 at 2:52 pm
In addition to a greenstick fracture of my right arm in the third grade, caused by tripping on the asphalt, I also broke my big toe my junior year of college, during ultimate frisbee practice, when I took someone else’s place in a drill (I had already gone). We got tangled up and he (probably the smallest guy on the team too) fell right on my foot. I limped the half mile uphill back to my dorm in flip-flops, before getting my roommates to take me to the infirmary. 3 and a half weeks later, upon getting off my crutches, my direct roommate sprained his ankle and started using my crutches. Another roommate had sprained his ankle the previous year, and we joked that it was only a matter of time before our 4th hurt himself. The next year he hurt his foot jumping off a large truck (alcohol was involved). He never saw a dr. but he limped around for a few weeks.
Then of course there was the time I lost a furious best-of-3 foosball and punched our large, soft-looking couch in frustration. Turns out I hit it right where the heavy wooden frame sticks out, and bam, broken hand. Just after graduation, so no insurance either. Will probably never live down the fact that I broke my hand on a couch.
posted by Colin on 12-19-2007 at 2:53 pm
Speaking of toes and stupidity, It just so happens that I sliced my second toe (and no, it’s not longer than the biggie toe) just this morning. I needed to get a full clothes basket onto the bed, but only had one free hand (the other was holding onto a wet towel from the morning’s shower). So having grabbed the basket with my free hand, I put my doomed foot against the basket for leverage and hoisted it onto the bed. Well, in the process, my toe caught the edge of one of those cheese slicer holes on side of the basket and… Son of a…!!! To make matters worse I have no band-aids in the house. D’oh! So I dabbed on the Neosporin, carefully slid the sock on, then the shoe and off I went.
posted by Fletch on 12-19-2007 at 3:01 pm
I could write a whole book on my injuries.
I have a bone disorder called osteogenesis imperfecta….therfore, I have had lots of fun breaks. :)
One good one, when I was in sixth grade I was trying to do the Greek dance that Michelle does for her class in one of the episodes of Full House.
My leg was stuck in a bent position and my mom had to call the ambulance to come and get me because she couldn’t move me, it was far too painful. This happened when I had two weeks left of wearing an air cast for a broken ankle.
Two weeks left of wearing a brace for my knee and my hand went through a window. Sixth grade was a good year.
posted by amanda on 12-19-2007 at 3:04 pm
I once sprained my ankle very badly while running around playing in underground tunnels with the guys in a forest. I nearly fell down a giant hole and one of them caught me right before, but the ankle smacked the side of the cement wall. Ow! Told my mom I tripped in a pothole in the roller rink parking lot (where we were supposed to be, instead of exploring the forest underground.)
But I have a great freak accident story from a friend Kara in high school. She was in a very bad car wreck, and got all smashed up, but thought her injuries were over. No such luck: two months later, she sneezed in the shower and the impact broke her sternum in two, which was apparently fractured from the wreck. Yikes!
posted by Sarah on 12-19-2007 at 3:05 pm
Oh! Poor Stacy! I do know how she feels, though. I am accident prone to the extent that my friends and family just call it “Pulling a Karen”. A couple of years ago, I fell down the stairs in my apartment while holding a laundry basket and bottle of margarita mix- I ended up having broke a bone in my foot and not able to wear any type of healed shoe for 6 months (I still went over my friend’s house, though, and had a Mexican fiesta after the fall)
Then, a couple of months ago as I was rushing to catch a light so I could be on time to work, I tripped over nothing in the side walk and fell, face first, into a fire hydrant on the corner. A trip to the ER showed that my front two teeth had shattered in and through my lower lip. Yipes!
posted by Karen on 12-19-2007 at 3:16 pm
I think I was about 4 years old, and I was at the YMCA after school. A big group of us (of various ages) decided to play Cops & Robbers, and I was a Robber. We were hiding from the Cops in a big storage closet, but I got the bright idea to stand along the wall behind the door, so that when the opened it they still wouldn’t see me. The Cops, in their gusto, flung the door open. I was small enough that the door cleared my entire foot, except for the nail on my big toe, which was forced straight up. I screamed and one of the bigger kids scooped me up and ran me over to a counselor to show him my now-perpindicular toenail. I don’t remember what the doctor did for it, but I know that my toenail did completely fall off at some point.
I also have a friend who worked in construction. He was doing some roofing one day, and using an illegal safety-measures-be-darned method, he nailed his big toe to the roof. He didn’t tell any of the other guys because he didn’t want to freak them out (and he didn’t want to look like a sissy) so he grabbed a little saw and lifted his foot a tiny bit and sawed the nail off, underneath his boot. He then told the guys he had to drive himself to the hospital. The doctor there gave him back the nail in a little jar.
posted by caitlen315 on 12-19-2007 at 3:19 pm
Thanks for all of the well wishes!! =) Some of your stories are making me cringe. Yikes. My protruding toe bone pales in comparison!!
posted by Stacy on 12-19-2007 at 3:23 pm
Ugh! All this talk about breaking bones, impaled arms, and twisting joints is making my stomach do loopty loops.
I broke my collarbone in basketball practice doing a football drill. Coach was teaching us how to be aggressive and go for the ball after a blocked shot or tipped pass. To do so, he threw the ball out onto the court, blew a whistle, and two guys were supposed to go for the ball as hard as they could; it’s called a “fumble drill” in football. It was my turn up and the other guy got to the ball first, throwing an elbow that caught me right in the clavicle. Hurt like an SOB, I went to the ER, and the coach vowed never to do that drill again.
posted by SpaceMonkeyX on 12-19-2007 at 3:23 pm
Ouchie, fractured toes hurt. I broke my little toe by stubbing it… it was purple for about 3 months and I couldn’t wear closed shoes, which worked fine cuz it was summer.
My worst injury? In high school I broke and dislocated my ring finger on my left hand by trying to catch a softball with a mitt that was too small. I can’t tell you how bad that hurt. The worst part though? Exactly one year later, my dad was dropping me off at school and I slammed my (left) hand in the sliding van door. Then he started to drive off, oblivious to my scream. I managed to yank it out pretty much immediately (I strangely have no memory of this incident). I also do not remember what I did next, which I found out later was this: I went to my locker, put my lunchbox away, talked to someone for about 2 minutes, and walked the long way down to the nurse’s office, dripping blood the whole time. I sat down in the nurse’s office and waited patiently while another student complained about their cramps… and then I fell onto the floor unconscious. I had re-broken it, almost cut off the end, and almost lost my nail. I had dripped a bloody trail through the upper school and my wails had people coming from down the hall to see who was dying.
Worst. Thing. Ever.
posted by Molly W. on 12-19-2007 at 3:34 pm
When I was in 5th grade I broke my leg playing baseball. I was laying on the ground and had gone into shock immediately so I did not feel any pain. My coach came over to me, asked if I could stand up, and since I felt no pain I obliged. As soon as I stood and put weight on my right leg the bone popped thru the skin, and needless to stay I fell right back down. As I lay on the field bleeding, I could not help but sit up and stare at the bone that was protruding about an inch out of my leg. It took the ambulance about 45 minutes to get to me, however since I was in shock there was no pain and I didn’t care. I ended up in the hospital for 15 days, had 3 surgeries, and then was in a cast from my hip to my toes for 2 months. I graduated to a walking cast for a month after that, just in time for summer.
posted by Neal on 12-19-2007 at 3:38 pm
My boyfriend’s birthday is on Friday. I got him a very old, very heavy typewriter. There is one guy where I live that repairs typewriters.
Last night, I was lugging the cumbersome thing through my apartment building so I could get the guy to clean the machine for me. I was about to go down the four stairs that lead to the parking lot when a painter said “Be careful”. I said “Yup”, and promptly fell down the stairs.
My ankle hurts and I pulled a muscle in my thigh. The typewriter is ok though – the ring finger on my right hand broke the fall of that 40-lb. behemouth.
I am now sitting at work with my finger in a splint and a sincere hatred for obsolete word-processing machines.
posted by Amanda on 12-19-2007 at 3:40 pm
I’m a faller. Last time I fell down the stairs was a doozy. The stairs at my house are angled with a landing (14 straight down, a landing, then 2 more to the left. At the bottom of the 2 I keep a baby gate to keep the dog downstairs while I’m at work. One day, I was running late, ran down the 14 and thought, oh, I’ll just jump from the landing (keep in mind that’s 2 steps from the floor) over the baby gate. I’m only 5 feet tall and my “jumps” just aren’t that high so when I jumped, one foot caught on the gate and I smashed down on the den floor (remember, my height plus the 2 steps I thought I’d skip, plus the jump) and landed face down and positively was so stunned that I couldn’t move for several minutes. Needless to say when I could move, I really couldn’t. So, I just called in sick to work and stayed on the floor for a while.
That was the worst. I usually have an audience though. Luckily this time I didn’t.
posted by Fran on 12-19-2007 at 3:56 pm
I have never had any freak accidents or ridiculous injuries (knock wood). However, a friend of my mother’s has always been particularly accident prone. In fact, while lying on the ground after her latest fall during Freshman year, a visually impaired student found her on the ground. He tapped her with his cane, said, “Hello Carol” and proceeded to walk away.
posted by bzzyb on 12-19-2007 at 3:57 pm
When I was about six years old I bit my tongue off while I was with my family at the library. Completely off. We still don’t really understand what happened, I just fell in the middle of the library and chanced upon biting my tongue off. There’s still a pretty wicked baby-teeth shaped scar on my tongue from when it occured.
Oh, two years later I shattered my arm on a mattress. I’m super-lucky when it comes to those sorts of things.
posted by Rose on 12-19-2007 at 4:09 pm
I was hit by a falling dead pine tree while sitting near a river minding my own business in Colorado. Thank god I only suffered a puncture wound in my leg, an avulsion on my palm, a few superficial scalp wounds and a broken finger. By now, the cool story of how I can’t seem to notice a 30 foot stick heading towards me makes up for the fact that I can’t make a full fist anymore.
posted by CBD on 12-19-2007 at 4:11 pm
Man, all of your stories make me feel better about being so clumsy! I hope some of you have some good insurace policies!
When I was 4, I was running through Pizza Hut to meet my sisters at the Pac Man machine. I caught my sandel on a chair and hit the corner of the machine with my forehead. Blood was gushing everwhere and their pale-blue tile in the bathroom soon turned red.( not sure who got the pleasent job of cleaning that up!) On the way to the hospital my oldest sister kept asking my mom if I was going to die!! Lots of stitches later I was all better.
Then when I was 10 I had a compound fracture on my right arm…breaking both bones in half. I made my parents promise they wouldn’t get rid of the trampoline. A few months later I chipped my knee cap. And sometime after than I split my head open again. oh, yeah, I’ve also broken a finger.
posted by Angela on 12-19-2007 at 4:22 pm
I feel your pain about the toes…mine are very sensitive so if I just stub them, it kills me!
My worst injury would be the weekend before finals my sophmore year of college. We apparently had decided that partying would be more productive than studying this particular night so you can understand what kind of a state I was in. My dog had run over to the neighbor’s house so I walked over in the dark, picked her up, and proceeded to walk back to the house. Since it was dark and I was carrying a 40 lb dog in my arms, I didn’t notice the ditch that I stepped in. After I fall down, drop the dog, and swear a few times, I try to stand up only to hear two very loud cracks and fall right back down. I had my cell phone in my pocket so I called my boyfriend but since I was crying so hard he didn’t understand anything I was trying to say except for “the dog ran off.” He hands the phone over to his roommate to try and understand me while my boyfriend runs out to find the dog. After his roommate carried me back into the house, we had to decide if I was in enough pain to go to the hospital which of course meant calling my dad at 2:30 in the morning. Since both my ankles hurt to even look at, we decided this was the best option. So I call my dad bawling about how I hurt myself and he can’t understand me either. The first thing he says? “Is the car ok?” So let’s recap: I’m crying my eyes out, in tremendous pain, my boyfriend goes to find the dog instead of me and my dad is worried about the car instead of me…I felt really cool. Turns out I severely sprained my ankle (the annoyed ER doctor only looked at one even though they both hurt) and had to be on crutches for finals and moving out of the dorm at the end of the year.
posted by Carabeth on 12-19-2007 at 4:42 pm
When I was 7 I was playing sumo wrestling with my brother on my parents’ bed. My brother is five years older than I am, and I was a very slim little girl. Long story short, I ended up flying five meters off the (elevated!) bed onto my pinky toe, which promptly broke. Next morning I got up, tried to put on my pink bunny slippers, realized my foot was twice the normal size and a lovely lavender color, went up to my mom and told her my foot hurt. At the hospital I was forced to sit in a wheelchair because my huge purple foot alarmed the nurses.
Best part, though, that night, when my cast was still drying, I went to a David Copperfield show and we got let in through a back entrance and given VIP seats because my brother had to carry me! Good times.
posted by Mery on 12-19-2007 at 4:46 pm
I tripped over a book in the floor, and a pushpin went into my foot. Which doesn’t sound like a big deal, but it was in the TOP of my toe, near where the nail meets. And it was extremely, extremely painful.
I couldn’t get it out and of course I was crying hysterically. My brother was scheming, trying to come up with a way to sneak by and yank it out. Eventually I went to the hospital and they told me I was being ridiculous. Except that they couldn’t get it out either, and it was VERY painful. After much begging, they finally did an x-ray.
Oh. It was actually stuck my bone, and the tip had twisted into a hook, which was preventing it from coming out. They told me that it if they’d tried to yank it out, they probably would have shattered the bone and I may have had to have my toe amputated!!!
They ultimately got it out, without any amputations or bone shattering. Unfortunately, I had some nerve damage so I still have difficulty wearing flip flops…
posted by Betty on 12-19-2007 at 4:53 pm
I’ve never broken anything but I do have some riduculous injuries. When I was about 6 I stepped on a wood block with a nail in it. The nail went straight through my precious little mermaid tennis shoes and right through the top of my foot. I was yelling at my dad to help but he didn’t hear me for several long minutes. A few months later I jumped off some scaffolding onto another wood block with a nail sticking straight up, this time in my bare feet.
Also in the third grade while playing kick ball a boy ran into me with so much force it shattered my glasses all over my face. It left a lovely broken glass patterned bloody scab all over one side of my face.
While playing hide and seek with my brother he grabbed my leg and I fell hitting my eyebrow on the corner of the hallway. I didn’t need stitches but no hair grows in that area of my eyebrow still. Lovely.
posted by Brandi on 12-19-2007 at 5:07 pm
Great fracture stories, but am I the first open fracture here?
I got hit by a car in 1991 while crossing a street. All the impact did was break my left leg — however, the break consisted of an inch of bone pulverized and a hole ripped in my leg about two inches above the ankle. They had to cut a door in my first cast so I could dress the gaping hole twice a day, which consisted of rinsing with sterile water and re-packing with gauze. I spent the month of July in bed with the leg propped up, and later had to get a metal pin in the leg to hold the bone chips together so the leg would heal.
I now have a deep oval dent in my left leg that you can pretty much put your thumb in. People call it my second belly button.
posted by lleachie on 12-19-2007 at 5:28 pm
May I suggest better lighting and maybe paint the stairs tan? I bet that would satisfy your poltergeist and it’ll go away.
posted by Johnny Cat on 12-19-2007 at 5:44 pm
When i was about 13, i was riding my mountain bike at full speed down a semi-steep hill. This hill turned at the bottom with a nice sloping bank so you could go thru it pretty quick. One day we got bored of just going fast so we put a jump at the bottom of the hill after the corner. So i take off and get up to full speed flying downhill, i take the corner, and hit the jump. It was awesome, until i landed. When i hit the ground, my front wheel decided it wanted to turn around and go back the way i just came, so i basically went from about 25 mph to stop in half a foot – i flew off the bike about 5-10 feet forward, i land pretty much like you would if you held a uncooked steak over your cutting board and just let it fall and slap against the board. So i rolled over and sat up, only to get hit in the face with the bike which had been thrown into the air by my feet from the sudden stop, i had a fat tire mark on my forehead going down to my jaw and down my right shin – at that point i felt a sharp pain in my leg – i look down and see a hole right above my knee about the size of a small garden hose and i can see my leg bone, then it fills with blood and drenches my whole leg. I managed to stand up and stumble with my hand firmly closed over the gushing puncture wound(btw, asphalt street with a fat rock imbedded in it did the hole) – i managed about 3 houses down the block and had to stop, got light headed – fortunatly by then my friends had seen me and ran for their dad who drove me to the hospital – the doctor said i lost over half my blood so i ended up having to be admitted and given blood. All in all, i enjoyed the jump, hated the landing :)
posted by Chadwick on 12-19-2007 at 6:06 pm
Wow; what a sad lot! I feel right at home. Take good care of yourself and do what your doctor tells you.
I broke an ankle in 2002, trying to pop a wheelie on a little aluminum kick scooter. The front came up too quickly when I pulled, I lost my balance and fell on my butt with my foot underneath. Broke the tibia in one place and the fibula in two, just above the ankle.
That one cost me three days in the hospital, two surgeries (one to implant the plates/screws, one to remove them 9 mos. later), four weeks off work, and 10 weeks on crutches.
The Dr. who did the surgery said if I were a 10 year old boy he’d cast it and I’d be running around in four weeks. Too bad 40 year old bones don’t heal that quickly.
I wrote more about it here:
http://www.davintosh.com/?p=170
posted by Dave on 12-19-2007 at 6:15 pm
Wanna hear a really gross big toe story?
When I was maybe 15, I stubbed my toe super badly opening my front door. It turned purple, but wasn’t broken. After the toe calmed down, the area under the toenail remained a dark purplish color, but I figured it would go away in time.
Some time later (a week or two?) I decided to trim my toenails. My big toe still had that funny color — I figured the nail bed was bruised. Yeah, so basically as I trimmed the nail I released a torrent of pent-up week-old blood from under the nail! Blood went squirting out the front and sprayed a stream across the wall in front of me. Then the nail came off completely, and there was this super-gross purple/black blood everywhere. A new baby nail had started growing underneath the old nail, which I guess had forced it to separate from the nail bed.
Anyway it’s no exposed bone, but dude. Serrrrriously gross.
posted by Higgins on 12-19-2007 at 8:51 pm
started reading the comments, but finally skipped them since they got more and more painful :)
Stacy, put some of those rubber guards on the edges of the stairs … that way you can keep walking around in your socks ..
posted by Jocelyn on 12-19-2007 at 8:57 pm
I broke my pinky toe while closing the door to the bathroom one time. It got stuck underneath it-I had closed the door right over my toe. Most people who hear that story don’t know that a) it’s possible to close the door on your toe and b) the pinky toe can actually be broken. I didn’t go to the doctor or anything since there really wasn’t much they could do. But it’s kind of funny. :)
posted by Kate on 12-19-2007 at 9:56 pm
i live in a gorgeous old house. that said, it’s a mess. awful plumbing, no heat, no insulation. i have had the falling down the wooden stairs experience my whole life..you get better at catching yourself.
by far my best injury was when i decided it would be a good idea to do a cartwheel in a room i hadn’t done that in in about…four years. so i do so, HIT MY FOOT ON AN OPEN SAFE (old houses have ridiculous things in them) and sat down. i soon realize i am bleeding through my sock and my dad drives me to the ER.
i fractured the side of my foot and cut the skin between my pinkie and…not pinkie tow almost to the bone. supposedly they don’t often do stitches on pinkie toe injuries, but i was oh so lucky! and i didn’t get any good drugs, so it was not worth it.
posted by schmooz on 12-20-2007 at 12:09 am
because my second toe is longer than my big toe, i got it caught on a door jam one day as i was walking through it. this resulted in breaking all the toes on my foot except for the big toe. my pinky toe was at a 90 degree angle off my foot. it was a ridiculous kind of gross looking injury, and since there’s nothing they do for broken toes, i set them myself and wrapped them up with some tape and went on my merry way…stepping on a rusty (square) nail the next day.
posted by laura on 12-20-2007 at 12:53 am
Oh where to even start??
When I was 4 or 5 I went running from my Father’s store to the store next to it to retrieve a book I had left there. It was pouring rain and I was wearing sandals. I tripped just before I reached the door and came smashing down on my face. My nose hit that metal thing at the bottom of a door frame and I bled everywhere. It wasn’t broken but ever since that, if something hits my nose, I get a nosebleed.
Fast forward 3 or 4 years. I got my first pocket knife. I figured I’d try my hand at whittling. (To me it consisted of turning a stick into a pointy stick) being the obediant child I am I listened to my mother and my step dad when they told me to be sure to cut AWAY from my body. Well, apparently I forgot to keep the finger on my left hand out of the way and after hitting a knot in the stick the pocket knife went full speed into my left index finger.
The same year I was reaching in the window of my house for something. It was an old house and we had to prop the window up with something to keep it open. While reaching in I knocked out the prop and the window came crashing down on my arm. Again, not broken but badly bruised and I was in a sling for weeks.
In 6th grade my school had a bomb threat (we had 16 of them that year) and we were all outside while the dogs sniffed our whole school. I decided to pass the time by playing on the monkey bars. As soon as I let my feet fall from the ladder I lost my grip and fell onto my arm. Hairline fracture got me a cast from hand to armpit.
The next year I was hit by a car. 2 cracked ribs, road rash all over my face (no scars, miraculously, except a teeny almost charming one on my chin) a nice gash on the top of my head, bruised growthplate on my right knee, and a nasty gash/rip/chunk-taken-out-of my left shoulder. Took over 300 stitches to piece it back together.
Sophomore year of high school my friends and I had been playing on a gokart. We decided one of us would drive and another would hold onto the roll bars from behind and see who could hang on the longest. I won, but when I flew off I fell into the path of the figure 8 dirt track right in front of the gokart. My best friend since 2nd grade ran over my ankle. I limped away not thinking it was a big deal and realized I was bleeding through my sock. I took it off and saw that I could see my bone. We took pictures. Doctors said it wasn’t broken, but gave me 5 stitches. (Only my second batch since the 300) Weeks later my mom, an rn, was looking at my ankle and found a huge calcium deposit that felt like extra bone. Turns out it was broken. Luckily I had to be on crutches so my stitches wouldn’t rip and it healed nicely besides the calcium lump that stayed for years.
2 years ago I was performing in a drag show and jumped off the stage as part of my act and generally trying to look like a badass. The stage wasn’t but 2 and a half feet tall so I didn’t think itd be a problem. When I landed my knee was locked and everything sort of crashed together. I immediately hit the ground in the middle of my show. People had to carry me to the office where they iced me up as good as they could. Numerous x rays showed no breaks and finally I had an MRI to see if I did any soft tissue damage. When I went to the dr to get the results, the words he used were “you smooshed your tibial plateau” and “this is probably a lot worse than you thought it was going to be when you crutched in”. 6 screws a metal plate and 6 months on crutches. I got to where I could even dance on crutches. It healed nicely though.
As for your paranormal accident, I was working in a small home furnishing/home decor type of store and I was holding a blown glass christmas tree shaped candy/cookie bowl. Just holding it, absentmindedly talking to my coworkers. I was looking through the green glass and as soon as I lowered it from my face it exploded. After the shock of it, my coworkers and I said “that was weird” and then I felt stinging in my right wrist. I looked down at a slit in my wrist so clean it hadn’t even started to bleed yet (which was actually more terrifying than when it bled as I could actually see the vain it could have hit). I said “I think I need to go to the hospital” and we wrapped my wrist up in packing tissue paper (the exact kind we used to wrap up items like the offending christmas tree when sold) I got nine stitches in my wrist (down the street not across the river) and had to endure looking like a failed suicide attempt for weeks. Longer actually considering the scar was bright red for over a year after. 3 days later I picked up a fishbowl at wal mart and as I was setting it down it shattered. The sound of breaking glass still makes me cringe.
Happy healing to you.
posted by sara on 12-20-2007 at 1:15 am
I tripped while I was walking my dog four years ago and ended up with a broken knee. My neighbor came outside, but left me on the sidewalk because she had to get to a meeting. She told me to call another neighbor when I got back to my (2nd floor) apartment. Anyway, another neighbor ended up having to call the ambulance to come get me. A week later, they finally did surgery to wire my kneecap back together. I was also on percocet, but for about a year. I’d like to say that after 2 surgeries, 4 months of physical therapy, and a year of pain killers, my knee is as good as new. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. It still hurts almost everyday; although I am now more thankful than ever about my ability to walk!
posted by Martha on 12-20-2007 at 9:49 am
Through out my 25 glorious years on this earth I have been known as a klutz and I started the inuries early! My first one was at 9months old, I was in Germany on one of those horses, you know the kind that bouce up and down with the springs? well I was rocking back and forth on one and fell backwards on to the concrete and had to get 10 stitches on the back of my head. The next injury came when I was about 4 years old at my father’s softball game, I ran down the bleachers and fell and split my lip open 3 stitches needed. the next one (of many)came at my brothers 5th birthday party. I was being chased by my cousin and he pushed me over a log, I broke my right arm for the 1st, yes 1st time. About 6 months later I was swimming in one of those pools you set up for little kids while I was underwater my brother jumped on my head causing me to get 5 stitches in my chin. Fast foward 2 years I was once again being chased, this time by my brother through the house my foot got caught on a dining room table chair and I fell head first into the glass coffee table and had to get 9 stitches above my left eye. About 5 years after that I was riding my bike and flipped over the handle bars breaking my left arm! My freshman year of high shcool i was playing my first ever game of basketball, at the tip off I dislocated my left ring finger! About 2 years ago I fell down the stairs with my dog in my arms and broke my right ankle. The most recent injury was last night, i got a new puppy named Marilyn, who decided to be underfoot with me and tripped me and i fell on my right arm and sprained my wrist.!
Here’s to a speedy recovery to you!!
posted by Amanda K. on 12-20-2007 at 11:55 am
I played bass guitar in my high school jazz band. One day after school I was walking through the band room after having put my bass in a locker. To leave I had to walk behind the band director, meaning the whole marching band that was practising was facing me. With a sudden uncharacteristic need for bravado, I decided that instead of walking around the chair in front of me, I would leap onto it and then jump off. Unfortunately, my sense of balance was somewhat thrown off due to the fact I was wearing a backpack. I jumped, I landed on the chair, the chair flipped backwards, I flipped backwards. When all was said and done, I was lying on my back on the underside of the chair, a leg of which was poking through the (thankfully not gaping) hole it had ripped in my shirt. There was silence. The band director turned, gave me a somewhat confused and amused silly-girl-why-are-you-laying-on-a-chair-on-the-ground-behind-me? look and said to move along, seemingly unconcerned that his bassist was very nearly impaled. I, as gracefully as possible, disentangled myself and skulked off.
posted by cousin on 12-20-2007 at 12:30 pm
Ouch hope it gets better fast!
Why I found this site… I’m pretty sure I just broke my pinkie toe on my left foot by slamming it into a kitchen chair. (I’ve already broken my 2nd, 4th and 5th toe on my right foot) You’d think I’d learn to walk… or wear shoes in the house.
I sprained my thumb when I fell off my bike at about 8 years old… had 3 fingers slammed in a car door. I’ve also had stitches in my chin when i was 10, broke my left arm also when i was 10, sprained my right wrist at 14(this is when I learned I can’t roller skate). I severely sprained my left ankle walking down the stairs in college because I apparently have a depth perception problem and I don’t see the bottom step. And about a year ago I fell down the stairs twice in 6 months and severely bruised my tail bone. and I’m only 26.
I’m surprised I can keep insurance. lol
posted by Crystal on 12-20-2007 at 4:39 pm
Friends installed a cable from their back porch to a 500 year old oak tree in the yard. A T-Bar and pulley were attached to the cable. The idea was to slide down the cable (about 20 yards) and stop yourself by bouncing your feet off this massive tree(a mattress was wrapped around the tree as a “safety precaution”. My “inner voice” told me “what! are you kidding”, but the numerous beers I had drunk told me “wheeee!”. Before I took the plunge; I announced to everyone “watch me break something”. Ha! I started out ok, but then started to twist on the pulley, I brought my legs up to try to straighten myself out, by this time I was at the tree and had missed the mattress, I took the entire impact to my right foot. I hit the ground and looked up at the rest of my drinking buddies and announced (in a relatively calm voice) ” I broke something!” Everyone thought this was hilarious! Once I finally convinced everyone I was, indeed, injured; they assigned their 16 year old daughter to drive me to the emergency room (she was the only one of the group who was not inebriated). She felt the need to drive around town for about an hour picking up friends before driving me to the hosital (she was seldom allowed Mom and Dad’s car). Turns out, I had shattered my heel!! 2 operations, 2 casts, 2 pins and year of convalesing was the result of my drunken encounter with a tree.
posted by Rikki on 12-20-2007 at 5:36 pm
I too am one of the numerous people who seem to be cursed with horrible clumsiness. . .When I was a kid I remember ALWAYS had a ton of cuts and scraps from trips and falls. Normally they were from climbing trees. Ironically the first big accident I remember is wearing ‘dressy’ shoes to school and spraining my ankle and wrist at recess.
In seventh grade I did a handstand and my left big toe came down on the armrest of our couch, and I dislocated it. The pain was SOO bad I couldn’t pop it back for 11 weeks until I tripped in flip-flops. I had to run on the side of my foot in PE and volleyball for those 11 weeks, I’m not sure why we didn’t get it looked at.
My junior year I was sitting on the couch when the phone rang. I was expecting a friend so I JUMPED up off the couch and heard a pop. Six hours later when my ankle was the size of a softball and I couldn’t cry from pain anymore that they took me to get it looked at at 10pm. The doctor told me that if I did anything to it ever again, I’d need surgery. I was in an air cast for 10weeks and I went to a private school where the dress code meant all my shoes were heels. It was interesting, I was the favorite joke of my classmates for months. I also broke my pinkie toe. . .but I think it was the typical kicking a chair accident.
I hope your ‘friend’ gives you a break for a bit!
posted by Meg on 12-20-2007 at 6:39 pm
Last New Years, I didn’t break anything but broke a glass on the floor. Being the great house guest that I am, I attempted to pick it up. Charlie the dog was interested in what I was up to and knocked me over landing my right hand on the glass. I cut my middle finger to the bone exposing muscles and all the other innereds. It bled so bad that the blood was actually shooting out like in the movies. Luckily the alcohol in the blood (New Years) probably cleaned the wound and deadend the pain. No hospital visit, but the tip of the finger didn’t have feeling for a while.
Sorry about your toe, but I take x-rays for a living and rely on people falling down stairs and such for job security. I’ve seen many an odd accident. Good luck with the healing!
posted by Heather on 12-20-2007 at 7:58 pm
I haven’t ever broken anything, but I do have a kind of strange injury/scar.
When I was 3 I was jumping on my bed, as most 3-year-olds do. I fell and my cheek landed right on my bedpost. Well, that hurt pretty bad, but my mom didn’t think anything of it until a few days later when I had a dimple that I didn’t have before. That dimple has never gone away. I was permanently scarred by a bedpost, but it looks like dimple, so no one’s the wiser.
Interestingly enough, my friend who lived next door at the same time got a dimple in her cheek in a similar way. She ran into a doorknob.
posted by Janel on 12-20-2007 at 10:54 pm
The only time I ever fractured a bone, it was the knuckle of my little finger. It was a cold winter day and I was home on our small farm by myself. I went out to feed the horses and check on their water and noticed that the horse tank was frozen over. As I was breaking the ice with a sledgehammer, my little finger got between the handle of the hammer and the edge of the tank. It hurt a lot, but all the doctor did was prescribe a split for a couple of weeks.
posted by Average Jane on 12-21-2007 at 9:35 pm
(What to choose? what to choose?) O.k how about this:
I tripped over the line on the map.
As teenagers, my buddy and I were running down the street. literally “down the street” because it was on a hill. I tried to stop. My bottom half was stopping more than my top half so I stumbled and went “splat” face forward onto the pavement. I broke the cartilage in my right knee, scraped huge patches of skin off my forearms, and my right hip. I went for x-rays, no broken bones. Then I realized that where I had stumbled and fell was exactly on the borderline between two townships, as if I had tripped over the line that you see on a map. :p
posted by Tdave on 12-22-2007 at 3:41 am
I am known as “accident prone” at work. (and everywhere else I have lived- many, many places) Let’s see… While in college, I stepped off a median and broke my ankle. It was literally 6 inches. My left ankle just decided not to come with the rest of my body and I crumpled on top of it. Eventually got to the campus clinic (a man came up to me and said, “Are you in need of medical assistance young lady!” I thought I was hallucinating.) The doctors there said it was just sprained. I argued with them that I’d heard it snap. They didn’t listen. The next day, it was tilting to one side, black and blue on one side, and it just didn’t look right. Went to another doctor who looked at it and said, “That’s broken.” I then had to move the next week, that wasn’t fun.
A few years later, I moved to Korea. My THIRD day in Korea I slipped in the bathroom at work (I was living at the school where I was working for a few weeks) and landed on my ribs on the toilet- bathrooms in Korea are slippery, there’s no shower curtains, you just get the bathroom all wet. I went to admin in excruciating pain, and they arranged to have an ambulance take me to the hospital. (talk about a great first impression) Turns out I cracked a rib.
Then, last year, my first year in China (I move a lot), I managed to slip going up the stairs and messed my knee up, was on crutches for 6 weeks (really not fun at high elevation-6000 ft, it’s like trying to run on crutches, you’re out of breath in like 5 steps). Then, 2 weeks after I was off crutches, I fell off my bike and landed on my face- right on the school playground. I needed stitches on my lip. That was school picture week. Then, this year, about a month ago, a bike hit my moped head-on, and I landed on my tailbone, and apparently dislocated it. Which I can tell you, is quite painful.
That’s just in the past few years too, I seem to have an ability to turn a simple slip into an injury requiring medical attention. It’s a talent. :)
posted by greenstrawberries on 1-12-2008 at 3:54 am
True story… as it’s 20 minutes fresh…
So I was *just* thinking…
My old man moved into the new house a few years before I was born…
That’s funny because my wife is having a baby in September…
He moved because he didn’t like stairs…
I don’t know what his problem is…
They’ve never been a problem for me…
That would have made him 40? No, no 30…
But not quite…
More like 28 or 29…
I’m 28…
That’s funny.
Here’s the last step, I’ll do a little hop around the corner.
*crunch, right-side big toe folds*
Ahh crap, that was the second to last step!
posted by Tom on 6-26-2008 at 4:58 am
I already posted a comment to this about 6 months ago when I slammed my pinkie toe into my dining room chair… well I just freaking broke my big toe! i was walking up the stairs and got my toe caught in the hem of my pants… foot went one way… toe went the other. I went and had xrays this time…. definitely broken. so that’s… 6 broken toes now for me.
I called my best friend and told her I broke my toe and she LAUGHED! lol She says I need to wear steel toed boots… I say I just need steel toes.
posted by Crystal on 6-26-2008 at 7:57 pm
Looks like those stairs are steep and each one is higher than it should be..
posted by Kraila on 6-19-2009 at 7:52 am
It was a dark hallway. Half asleep I walked toward my daughter’s room to say goodnight … SHAZAM! My right foot hits a vacuum cleaner HARD! “I think I broke my toe! I think I broke my toe!” The light was switched on and there was my right pinky toe at a 90 degree angle to the right. It looked really bad, but didn’t hurt as much as you think it would have by the way it looked. It was not an open fracture, but it has been about 5 weeks now and I too cannot move it or even feel it like I did before. It is also positioned differently now from its other four siblings. But I did survive.
posted by Alaska Lady on 9-17-2009 at 11:51 pm
Oh my gosh! I am laughing SO HARD while reading this….!
I too am accident-prone, and just broke my right 4th toe two nights ago by walking into the bed and “kicking” the bed leg with my right foot. It caused my toe to be bent over at a 45 degree angle, and was very creepy looking. It was the 5th time I had broken a toe, so I was used to it. But, I did need to go to the ER to get it set and straightened. (YUCK!)
My mom is also very accident prone, and has suffered any broken bones in her time. The most spectacular accident occurred after one of the hurricanes had just passed through Central Florida in 2004. It was the day after, and she went outside to check the mail. Her lawn is edged by maple (?) trees, that bear a lot of acorns, and the winds of the storm had caused all of the acorns on all of the nearby trees to be blown off. She inadvertently stepped on an acorn, did a cartoon “whoa-I’m-falling” thing, and fell, breaking her shoulder, elbow, and ankle.
On an acorn!!!
posted by CeleBrat on 10-15-2009 at 11:00 pm