Drug Traffickers Open Fire on Santa’s Helicopter

Drug traffickers in a Rio de Janeiro slum opened fire on a helicopter carrying a Santa to a children’s party. The helicopter was forced to land, and two bullet holes were found in the fuselage. Apparently, the gangsters that control the slum areas mistook it for a police chopper. Uninjured and undeterred, Santa got a ride to the party by car.

Blue Man Leaves Oregon in Search of Acceptance

Paul Karason is as blue as a man can be, but he’s not just sad. He has been using colloidal silver as a remedy for 14 years, which can lead to a condition called Agyria, in which the skin turns blue. Karason says he hopes people in his new home in California are more understanding of the condition.

Son’s Punishment is Profitable

An unidentified father proudly returned home with a hard-to-find game that he bought for his 15-year-old son. The son was found smoking pot with friends in the backyard. The angry father put the Guitar Hero game for Wii up for auction on eBay, and sold his $90 investment for $9,100!

Man Finds His Long-Lost Birthmother at His Workplace

Steve Flaig drives a truck for the Lowes store in Grand Rapids. He had searched for his birthmother for years, until he realized he had slightly misspelled her name. A quick search revealed that she had recently been hired as a checkout clerk at … Lowes!

This Marriage Started in the Toilet

Jennifer Cannon married her Prince Charmin yesterday, and the couple started their new life together on a roll. They were wed in the Charmin Restrooms in New York’s romantic Times Square, and Jennifer wore a dress made from seven rolls of toilet paper.

iPond: Cool or Cruel?

The iPond is an iPod accessory the combines a speaker with a tiny aquarium! So tiny, some consider it a form of animal cruelty.

No Mating in Public, Even if You’re a Goat

A woman was ticketed after her goats were caught mating and relieving themselves on her own yard. Behind a fence. That’s illegal in Dibble, Oklahoma, even on private property. It makes one wonder what happened to cause such a law to be enacted.