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I would never survive a presidential campaign.
My oration lacks charisma. I’m not a fan of business travel. My resume is light on foreign policy experience, unless you count a spring break excursion to Port Lucaya and one weekend in Montreal. Plus someone, somewhere, has pictures from both trips.
(Also, I’m not yet 35.)
According to Article II of the U.S. Constitution, “No person except a natural born citizen, or a citizen of the United States, at the time of the adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the office of President; neither shall any person be eligible to that office who shall not have attained to the age of thirty five years, and been fourteen Years a resident within the United States.”
But the Founding Fathers failed to mention other disqualifications, like having incriminating photos tied to a Google Image Search of your name (so far, I’m clear) or suggestive comments on your Facebook Wall (no problem).
So the first question in today’s Friday Happy Hour: what in your past disqualifies you for the presidency?
Keep reading for four more.
2) What’s the strangest place you’ve been to that offers free wireless internet service?
3) What’s a movie you expected to love, but hated?
4) What’s a TV show you expected to hate, but loved?
5) How does one dispose of paint cans? (I realize this isn’t very interesting, but I have a basement full of mostly empty paint cans I’d love to eliminate. Any advice?)
Comments (62)
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1) Being an atheist pacifist pretty much rules me out in this country. Might work in another country, though.
2) Pawn shop.
3) Can’t think of any! That’s rather cheering.
4) CSI. I feel bad for watching it, but I’m hooked.
5) Recycle – in art projects, as drums, or at a recycling center. Stack them with boards to make shelves.
posted by Aemi on 1-11-2008 at 8:26 am
1. i would say my refusal to call any religion wrong would probably do me in pretty quickly
2. you know, i never look for it, but i know there was a mcdonalds i went to that offered it
3. umm.. it just happened too, i was pumped to watch something from netflix and it was awful and now i can’t remember what movie it was, if i weren’t at work i’d look it up
4. heroes
5. i don’t think i’ve heard of anybody actually getting rid of them. my parents keep them in the garage. but i do know you’re not supposed to just put them in the trash.
posted by tami on 1-11-2008 at 8:41 am
1) I’m not 35 either. I’ve been pretty outspokenly Christian during college, though. I’d probably have a shot at the presidency in the bible belt, but I’d be abused by the media for having unintentional cross symbollogy in my advertisements…
2) McDonalds. I’ve always thought that McWiFi destroyed the purpose of ‘fast food.’ Who surfs the net at McD’s?
3) Pirates of the Carribean: Whatever the Last one Was. And I’m still angry about it XP Way to ruin a franchise by destroying the characters you established in movie one, Disney!
4) Disgustingly, Ugly Betty. ^^; I love it.
5) I was going to go with the crafty solution, too. Is there anywhere around that you could donate them to as art supplies?
posted by Ashley on 1-11-2008 at 8:41 am
1) Done nude modeling that has been published.. a lot.
2) A clothing store.
3) The Golden Compass
4) Heros
5) I have never had to dispose of paint cans but off the top of my head, you could always clean them out and use them for creative gift baskets.
posted by Diane on 1-11-2008 at 8:48 am
1) My God, I can’t begin to list the things I’d rather not have brought into a political campaign. The fact that I was a drug runner in the early 70s would hurt, no doubt (no convictions, or even prosecutions, but I’m sure it’d turn up). Also I’ve been married four times. My military service would get in the way (my squad didn’t exist and I still can’t get VA benefits). Plus I don’t have perfect teeth or a perfect haircut – that would torpedo me for sure. And I am a non-Christian in the Bible Belt and think that if people would just listen to each other, rather than prepare their next attack while the other guy is speaking, that we’d all be a lot better off. Oh, and I’m registered Independent.
Pretty much keeps me out of the running, although I am of the proper age and was born in the U.S.
2)Dunno – don’t use wireless internet.
3) Didn’t much care for “Sin City”, but was looking forward to seeing it… until I did. It barked.
4) “Law & Order”. Thought it’d be silly but am now a huge fan.
5) Paint cans can be disposed of at any qualified recycling facility. Our county dump has a special place for them, next to the recycled oil.
posted by Doc on 1-11-2008 at 8:55 am
1) Speeding tickets
2) Auto repair shop
3 & 4) none in recent memory (and with my memory that means very recent!) :)
5) Where I live they accept latex paint cans. But first you have to leave them open so they completely harden.
posted by Stew on 1-11-2008 at 8:55 am
5) I believe that if you open the cans and let the paint dry completely, you can throw them in the regular trash.
(Not that I’m advocating adding to our landfills, but I know I heard that somewhere.)
posted by bre on 1-11-2008 at 8:55 am
And I know I heard it somewhere besides the post that came two seconds before mine!
:-)
posted by bre on 1-11-2008 at 8:58 am
1.) Not 35 yet either and also a lack of foreign policy experience. Probably all of the crazy college pictures. None of them too too bad but still.
2.) Nothing But Burgers… I restaurant that you should just be eating a burger, drinking beer, and watching the game.
3.) The Notebook.
4.) My Name is Earl
5.) I think you are supposed to put kitty litter in the bottom of them to soak up any left over paint and then set them on the curb for trash pick up.
posted by Karen on 1-11-2008 at 9:00 am
1. Well, I’m an atheist, for one thing. I’ve never done well with math, as my grade reports will suggest. Someone would probably unearth the fanfiction I wrote way back when, and while it’s not really incriminating, when was the last time a fandom geek was elected president?
2. When I worked at my summer camp last year, if you sat on one particular rock on the edge of the lake you could get four bars of Verizon service and pick up on the neighbors’ wi-fi. It got pretty crowded on nights off.
3. Me and You and Everyone We Know (2005). Don’t even get me started.
4. Probably Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
5. Another reason I wouldn’t be elected president: I’d leave them in another person’s driveway in another neighborhood and let them deal with them.
posted by Laura on 1-11-2008 at 9:07 am
1) Well, let’s see: I’m not a former minister; nor a devout member of a non-traditional religious sect; only been married once (and remain married); not, however, married to a former President; no military record; and have held my current elected office more than two years. Clearly, I’m unqualified to be President.
2) My doctor’s office.
3) Runaway Bride. It stunk so bad, we walked out of it. Then, we realized we were at a drive-in, and had to go back and get our car. That was embarrassing.
4) Ghost Whisperer.
5) Fill them with kitty litter (if you have a lot, go to your auto parts store and get “Spee-D-Dry” oil absorber; it’s cheaper), dry up all the paint, then reseal the cans.
posted by Mike on 1-11-2008 at 9:12 am
1)There are a lot of reasons but the most prominent one is probably my fear of political public speaking. It is odd because I love debating with my friends and I had always loved giving presentations in classes so in high school I joined the debate team. It was congressional style debate and I was really excited. Unfortunately when I would go to the tournaments I would freeze up and not be able to speak. I really think that this disqualifies me for any political, let alone presidential aspirations.
2)The bathroom of a college campus. I know it isn’t that weird to have it on campus (and so naturally it would be available in the bathrooms) but I saw a girl on her laptop in there. It was bizarre.
3)Sweeny Todd – I actually did LOVE the story and the music but I couldn’t watch any of the bloody parts. I know that makes me kinda girly but it was just gross.
4)Project Runway
5)I think recycling is the best option – although I think you might have to take them to a specific recycling center that allows paint because not all do.
posted by Mara on 1-11-2008 at 9:13 am
1.) Age would be the first disqualifier, but the overriding reason I couldn’t be Prez is that I don’t want the job. I think that would be a pretty lousy platform to run on.
2.) McDonalds
3.) Napoleon Dynamite – Maybe I should see it again, but it just didn’t live up to any of the hype that all my friends gave it.
4.) West Wing – I really expected it to be dull, but man was I wrong. Sad that it’s over.
5.) I thought that most towns had a “Hazardous Waste Disposal Day” where you could bring things like paint cans to a designated collection site for disposal. I’d check with with my town/city hall to see when it’s scheduled.
posted by Bill T. on 1-11-2008 at 9:17 am
1. I’m Canadian and Catholic (with the exception of Kennedy, name me all the Catholic presidents). But I am 36!
2. In my city the goverment has set up free open wireless access all over the downtown, so you can imagine the unusual places you can get connected. Porta-potties? Church? Drunk tank at the pollice station?
3. The English Patient. I was ready for a classy movie, and it was terrible.
4. Lost and Heroes. I hate hype, but once I actually watched them I was hooked.
5. Where I live we have paint exchanges at the bottle recycling depot. Bring in and leave your old paint, take home some “new” old paint (if the color suits you). Get your passport up to date and come for a visit with your paint!
posted by Petro on 1-11-2008 at 9:21 am
1) I’m wiccan. And, besides that I *DO* inhale ;-)
2) Burger King.
3) That one with the chick who loves ballet, but doesn’t have the right feet or something, even though she ended up at a fancy-pants ballet school. It was so packed full of cliches that I thought I would vomit.
4) Third Rock from the Sun
5) I can’t really add anything that hasn’t been said.
posted by Michelle on 1-11-2008 at 9:27 am
1) I wasn’t born in the United States. You know, for a “nation of immigrants” it’s interesting to see the Constitution give such a blatant eff-you to immigrants.
2) Toyota dealership
3) Pearl Harbor. The most disappointing movie I’ve ever seen, and I saw Rocky V and Batman and Robin in the theater.
4) Battlestar Galactica. The old one was a little silly.
5) If they’re empty, I would say to just recycle them. If they’ve still got paint, no idea.
posted by Jim on 1-11-2008 at 9:30 am
1. Again, godlessness.
2. The pizza loft in the middle of Yosemite Valley. And Krystal burger.
4. Dexter! I can’t handle gore or horror. It took some time to figure out that this show is neither of those things.
posted by ellen on 1-11-2008 at 9:34 am
1. I’m only 25
2. I’m not a member of a “traditional” religion
3. I didn’t finish college
4. I’m too shy and stick at public speaking
On the plus side, I don’t have a criminal record and I’m pretty moral. Wait, that may count against me…
posted by SarahW on 1-11-2008 at 9:34 am
1. I am a Republican, I think that rules out any chance of me winning in 2008, and just in case that isn’t enough, I live in Texas.
2. A McDonald’s in Carthage, Texas, I was passing through town and I got a page from office with an emergency that had to be solved then. I drove around town looking for a Starbucks (ha ha) and I saw the Wifi sign under the Golden Arches.
3. Pirats of the Carribean: At World’s End
4) Big Bang Theory
5) I don’t know, but I work for a soldid waste disposal company – guess I should know – oh well, that is why I am in IT.
posted by Witty Nickname on 1-11-2008 at 9:41 am
1- Photographic evidence exists proving that I am A)not 100% heterosexual B)not obnoxiously religious C)not male D)a lover of hard rock.
2- a Barnes&Noble restroom. Not the store- just the restroom.
3- Happy Feet. I was excited for a solid year anticipating it. It took mass quantities of chocolate to pull me out of that dispair. Did they tell Savion Glover he was going to be contributing to a wildlife protection sermon?
4- Making the Team. Cheerleading generally nauseates me, but it was fun watching all the Barbies cry each week.
5- get some kitty litter and apply liberally. wash out, hammer flat and put in recyling.
posted by Karen on 1-11-2008 at 9:55 am
1. I’m not yet 35, I’m Catholic, I went to a regular-old state school (Geaux LSU! National Champions!), I live in a state widely regarded as politically corrupt (it’s not quite as bad as the rest of the world thinks), I’m a former member of the media (now I work in PR).
2. Texas public rest stops along I-20 between Shreveport and Dallas.
3. The Mummy
4. Dancing with the Stars
5. There is usually recycling day at the dump once a month when you can bring paint, batteries, all that hazardous stuff.
posted by Lindsey on 1-11-2008 at 9:58 am
1) I hired a nanny. How come babysitters don’t have to have SS withheld, but once they’re a “nanny” they do? Also, I’m an atheist.
2) McDonald’s in our neighborhood is the best I can think of.
3)Angela’s Ashes- LOVED the book, thought the movie was awful
4) Friday Night Lights
5)Apparently the answer is move. We inherited about 8 gallons of paint when we moved into our current house, and where we live you can only dispose of it on Saturdays, and you can only dispose of one gallon per week. How many people do you think are really doing it by these regs????!
posted by Lebetho on 1-11-2008 at 9:59 am
1) I have so many ways to be disqualified from this I can’t begin to count, so I’ll try to hit the highlights. I had way to much fun my first two years of college, and I don’t have any regrets about it. I’m a buddhist which would freak out most Americans, and I think we’ve become so partisan we’re incapable of doing great things anymore.
2)Aspen Colorado (at least back in the early 90s) offered free wireless internet across the whole town.
3)most recently 3:10 to Yuma, wow did that let me down at the ending.
4)Holmes on Homes, I’m not a handyman, but a friend recommended it and now I’m hooked.
5)My trash company will pick it up but you have to contact them ahead of time.
posted by Scott on 1-11-2008 at 10:03 am
2 – A strip mall diner called B&G Tasty Foods. One of their specialties is taco-in-a-bag (a bag of Fritos with meat, cheese, lettuce, tomato, and a plastic fork thrown in), and everything is kind of greasy and dirty. Not exactly the kind of place I’d bring a laptop.
4 – Rachel Ray’s 30 Minute Meals. She’s one of the most annoying, cheesy people on earth, but I still watch the show every day when I get home from work.
5 – In Omaha, there’s a place called Under the Sink that accepts all kinds of household hazardous waste. The usable stuff goes to the swap shop where other people can take it and use it. The rest gets recycled or disposed of properly.
posted by Molly on 1-11-2008 at 10:07 am
1. I am going to kick this off by making some friends. The first reason I could never be president is that I am a girl. I do hold on to the idea that the man is the head of the household. This doesn’t mean that I wear an apron and rub his feet every night, but I do think that women let their emotions get in the way. That being said, I am not a political person – I don’t vote, because I know nothing of anything politics, and do not care to, no one has to worry about me “messing anything up” with my oldfashioned poodle-skirt values. One of my favorite things to say when I want to stir up some controversy at work is,”Sometimes I just need a man to tell me what to do!”
Also, I’m only 25 and a vegetarian. My experience in the Southeast is that people react to vegetarianism in the same way they do to my tattoos. They are either really interested and full of questions, or disgusted/offended, mostly the latter.
2. I was super hyped about the Grindhouse movies. Old slasher flicks rule, and so I was excited to see someone try to bring them back. I liked “Death Proof” but was miserably disappointed by the other one. See? I can’t even remember the name… The one with the chick with the machine gun leg…
3. One night my husband and I were watching SpikeTV, probably watching MXC, when Ultimate Fighting came on. Being avid opposers of the overacting that is wrestling that is so popular here, we rolled our eyes, but were both to lazy to change the channel. I have been hooked ever since. I have my cable box programmed to prompt any time anything UFC is on.
4. I say toss them into a rival neighbor’s trash.
posted by Pearl on 1-11-2008 at 10:26 am
1) My hate of churches and distaste for religion.
2) Ballet Studio
3) Night at the Museum
4) Deal or no Deal
5) Garbage?
posted by Nathan on 1-11-2008 at 10:28 am
I just noticed I mis-numbered my stuff. I can live without internet, somehow, so I do not pay attention to WiFi locations. I do know, however, that I stayed in a hotel that promised WiFi, and lied. The opposite of what was asked in the question, but hey, I’m a rebel.
posted by Pearl on 1-11-2008 at 10:29 am
1. Let’s see: at college, in my apartment one night I harbored a guest speaker for the campus gay/lesbian student council, who was on some FBI list. Oh, and those two magazine layouts I posed for…
2. The garage at my company’s headquarters. I know with “hotelling” that our working office spaces are at a premium, but, the garage?
3. “Disney’s Haunted Mansion.” Love the ride, hated the movie. And, “Dudley-Doo Right.”
4. “What Not to Wear” on TLC.
5. My situation is worse: I live in an apartment, no garage, no external storage. When you find out a solution, let me know…
posted by Karl on 1-11-2008 at 11:10 am
1) my twenties
2)
3) crash
4) i love new york 2 (especially stoned, another reason for #1)
5)
posted by emily on 1-11-2008 at 11:15 am
1. I’m a female Christian Republican.
2.campground in the middle of nowhere Oregon
3.The Waterhorse
4.Gilmore Girls
5. leave em on a neighbors porch or ditch em in the dumpster at work.
posted by QT314159265 on 1-11-2008 at 11:17 am
1–I’m a high school dropout. Yeah, I’ve got a masters, but I bet the republicans would dig it up and make me sound like a flaky idiot.
2–nightclub. dark, loud, nowhere to actually set a computer down.
3–can’t think of one
4–America’s next top model. I refused to watch the first 2 seasons, now I’m an addict. I thought the premise was absurdly dumb. Still is, but it’s entertainingly dumb!
5–drum set?
posted by Jenny on 1-11-2008 at 11:18 am
I know one thing that should disqualify John McCain, he was not born on US soil and is therefore not a natural born US citizen. He was born in Panama.
posted by Jonathan Thomas on 1-11-2008 at 11:31 am
Jonathan,
American military bases overseas are considered American soil, I believe. Born on an air base is as good as being born in the States.
Also, the Canal Zone in Panama was a US territory at the time, was it not?
posted by Bill T. on 1-11-2008 at 11:44 am
1) I am honest, logical and support the idea that people need to be responsible for themselves before putting their hands out to the government.
2) I don’t know… bathroom in Starbucks?
3) Spinal Tap.
4) Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe
5) Incinerate them.
posted by Scott on 1-11-2008 at 12:08 pm
i’m already camPAINing for President (see, another pun!!)
my slogan is:
STANDARD OF MEDIOCRITY
we’re going for good enough!!
posted by the creature on 1-11-2008 at 12:19 pm
1) Not 35, horrifyingly bad public speaker.
2) I never use wireless outside of my apartment.
3) “Must Love Dogs” – I adore romantic comedies, but even by my standards, this one was bad, bad, BAD.
4) “The Biggest Loser” – addictive. Just like chocolate. ;)
5)You can either drop paint cans off at a recycling facility or pay a waste-removal company to take them and dispose of them for you.
posted by erin on 1-11-2008 at 12:49 pm
1. my college years
2. can’t think of anything
3. Stuck on You – I was excited to see another Farrely brothers film that ended being the first movie I walked out on.
4. Windfall – although it was pretty bad, I continued to watch it. I’m glad they cancelled it.
5. no clue
posted by greco on 1-11-2008 at 12:59 pm
1. I’m a chick. Don’t think that will happen anytime soon (I pray not now anyway).
2. I’m frighteningly new to WiFi with my new iPhone so don’t know yet.
3. Deja Vu
4. Heroes and The Office
5. Check out Lowe’s or Home Depot. My local Lowe’s will take them off my hands – as long as it’s the gallon ones. When I took in a couple of 5 gallon cans, they said they couldn’t take those (so I left them outside by their garbage can!)
posted by Fran on 1-11-2008 at 1:28 pm
1. My checkered past, although as some people have already pointed out-put enough spin on it and maybe I could pull it off anyway. I guess I’m not old enough yet.
2. A little local cafe-The Chicken Hut. I’m guessing 95% of their clientele only come for the early bird and senior specials.
3. Napoleon Dynamite; it just.wasn’t. funny. And I always thought I had “that” sense of humor.
4. I’m so ashamed, but until last night I scoffed at all “Apprentices”, esp. the so called celebrity version. Then I watched it last night.. and it’s so bad it’s good. I mean, I wouldn’t TiVo it or anything….
5. I think you’ve probably got your answer to this one by now. :D
posted by mrs.djs on 1-11-2008 at 1:33 pm
1. I’m a mormon. ‘Nuff said. (c’mon, I don’t think Mr.Mitt is going to get the nomination! and I wouldn’t want him to. besides, I’m a democrat)
2. At my local dog park. Like someone is going to surf the net while trying to keep their dog from eating someone else’s dog!
3. The fountain. It looked like a neat premise. oh, and Vitus. Not at ALL what I thought it would be…
4. Tarzan (I was in high school, it was on the WB…) Maybe it was called Greystoke. I’m not sure. But Tarzy was hot and the story wasn’t bad. And The Pretender!
5. I worked at a hardware store once- you can take it back to some stores and they’ll reuse the cans!
posted by Ashley on 1-11-2008 at 1:45 pm
1) Technically totally qualified. However, according to the omnipotent media the fact that I am not a closed-minded rich hatemonger disqualifies me. Le sigh.
2) My living room (thanks google)
3) Casino Royale (so tired of torture in movies)
4) Lost (completely avoided this till second season then got hooked on the DVD’s).
5) Here’s my alternative art project. Go to your paint cans and determine which walls they match and just how much wall space the leftover paint would reasonably cover (2 coats at least). Even if it will just cover a tiny patch, that’s fine, make a note.
Now go to said walls and get some different paint, markers, whatever, and draw a mural! Go crazy! Be all over the freakin place! Do something outrageous! But stay within the size limits of your left over paint. Leave up until you get tired of it and use up last of paint in storage painting over and restoring those walls to their previous boring condition.
Don’t forget to take pics and post them here! I’m looking forward to seeing them!
posted by jen in California on 1-11-2008 at 1:49 pm
1) I’ve been in a relationship with a girl. And loved it!
2) A laundromat in Guatemala.
3) Don’t really watch movies.
4) America’s Next Top Model
5) If you want them off your property, research local policies on waste disposal. some hardware stores will take them. Or you could plant flowers in them.
posted by Katie on 1-11-2008 at 3:14 pm
1. I’m too thin-skinned to make it through a campaign. I would not be able to handle all the mudslinging, personal attacks, and nasty ads that are part of a typical Presidential campaign if I were the target of them. I’d probably cry in public at some point, which would be the death knell of my campaign (although Hillary seems to have pulled it off recently).
2. Haven’t noticed
3. Lots of movies I could name, but I’ll echo some of the others who mentioned Pirates of the Carribean 3 because I recently wasted a Netflix rental on it. Good grief, it sucked!
4. Extreme Home Makeover is my guilty pleasure even though Ty Pennington annoys the heck out of me. Maybe I keep watching because out of hope that this episode will be the one where someone “accidentally” shoots Ty’s mouth shut with a nail gun.
5. Good question – I would check with your town or city. Lots of municipalities have special rules about disposing of and recycling things like paint cans.
posted by just_say_no_to_lutefisk on 1-11-2008 at 3:36 pm
1) I’m another Canadian Catholic, doubly diqualified
2) Tim Hortons, 2AM studying
3) Alien, sorry, just didn’t like it.
4) Max Headroom. I thought the premise was idiotic but the story and relevance carried it.
5) Put a little gas in it, seal it up and throw it on the fire.
posted by Mike on 1-11-2008 at 3:37 pm
1. I’m 23, for starters, but probably a bigger problem is that I think both major political parties suck pretty badly–I’m registered Republican, but that probably isn’t very useful at the present time either. Also, I’m a Christian–maybe I would say the name “Jesus” in a non-profane way, and then where would we be?
2. Hi-Way Diner in Lincoln, NE. The kind of 24-hour place that serves “Cajun Meatloaf” and something called “Magic Toast.” But hey, you can study there all night.
3. I’ll second the Pirates of the Caribbean 3 — maybe better if I watched it closer to the 2nd one so I remembered all of the happenings of it, but I found it confusing and not a very satisfying conclusion.
4. Scrubs. Happily surprised.
5. Moving does seem to work. My boyfriend just bought a house and they were kind enough to leave all of the paint cans there. I like that they make it sound like a gift–”so you can do touch ups if you like the colors”. He did not like the colors, and now has double the amount of paint cans he did before.
posted by kate on 1-11-2008 at 4:40 pm
1. Born overseas. Although I don’t speak a lick of Japanese and went to American schools all my life and a naturalized citizen, obviously cannot run for the presidency due to the law. I think Arnold wants to change that, I think he as aspirations as president after being governor of California.
2. Chinese foot massage place.
3. the last star wars movie
4. that plastic surgeon show Dr. 90210, sheesh!
5. put the cans in your garage. light the garage on fire. Voila! paint cans gone!
posted by JA on 1-11-2008 at 5:01 pm
In general, I don’t like people, and public consensus matters little to me in most cases.
posted by mike on 1-11-2008 at 5:07 pm
1. I’m Canadian, so sadly I can only observe the spectacular US political system.
2. A tiny hotel in the center of China.
3. Atonement. Great book, crappy movie.
4. The Unit. It’s everything I am against politically and ideologically wrapped up into one dramatic hour. But it’s so good!
5. At least in my city, there is a Hazardous Waste recycling centre were you can take your dried out paint cans and leave them, guilt free.
posted by Carole on 1-11-2008 at 6:34 pm
#5 (only) What kind of paint cans are we talking about?
I coach baseball and we paint our field before every game and we always just throw those spray cans away.
posted by DB on 1-11-2008 at 7:20 pm
1) I am a pro-choice and lesbian member of the Unitarian Universalists
2) Liquor store
3) Lost in Translation-I so wanted to like it but what a snooze
4) That show on VHI with Delicious trying to find lasting love-totally cracks me up
5) Ditto with the local recycling center/town recycling days
posted by womannequin on 1-11-2008 at 7:34 pm
#1: Soooooooo many reasons. I’m an atheist, a shiksa married to a Jewish man, nude photos (published), my teens, my twenties, my thirties, my forties, the drugs, the booze, the men……..good heavens I’m a tramp!
posted by AbbyJoy on 1-11-2008 at 8:29 pm
5. Please don’t wash the latex paint down the drain, whatever you do! Check your area high schools and community theaters- many would love a donation of latex paint for scenery, especially if it’s not beige and not dried up.
posted by Val on 1-11-2008 at 9:27 pm
Regardless of whatever qualifications I have for president, I’m disqualified for the shallow reason that I have no positive physical presence. Not many people would vote for me based on my physical appearance. On top of being slightly short (5′7″) I frequently experience people walking up to me, in public locations, and saying (such things as) that I should never leave the house because I am too ugly to be out in public. I even have trouble getting service in stores because clerks sneer and tell me, “You’re too ugly to be a customer.” or “I don’t serve ugly people.” I actually need to call on friends to go to stores with me to help me get service. – I could go on with some truly bizarre stories.
posted by Tdave on 1-12-2008 at 1:18 am
#4) I expected “Twin Peaks” to be a boring (soap opera like) serial, and not an interesting, quirky, murder mystery.
#5) In my area empty paint cans can be put in recycling bin. I think the stores that sell paint take unused paint for proper disposal. If you pour all the left over paint together into one or two cans, you could put most of the cans in the recycling bin.
posted by Tdave on 1-12-2008 at 1:36 am
I really just wanted to answer number 1.
Naked pictures. Tons and tons of naked pictures.
posted by lacey on 1-12-2008 at 1:58 am
1. Youth/Drugs
2. Canada
3. The Good Shepherd (for shame bobby)
4. Heroes
5. Hide them in recycling bin under newspapers, they get picked up and I forget about it.
PS. Also how I got rid of two old monitors
posted by e to the e on 1-12-2008 at 3:00 am
1. I, like McCain, was born on an army base. Except I was born in South Korea. Since it’s technically American soil, I don’t think it disqualifies me. This stuff does though: female, college, atheist, not old enough, living in sin and not nearly enough 000’s in my bank account.
2. The closet of my apartment (latching on to a neighbor’s because I am poor).
3. Eragon
4. America’s Next Top Model and Project Runway
5. Depending on the color and type, go get some unfinished shelves, bookcases, table etc. and use the paint to co-ordinate your home. My Mom has bookcases in the living room that match her bedroom walls, shelves in the kitchen that match the hallway and so on. It does something for the ‘flow’ she says.
posted by Hawkeyegirl on 1-13-2008 at 12:31 pm
1. Terrified of public speaking; drug intake during the 80’s and 90’s. Otherwise totally qualified.
2. A sports bar
3. There are a lot but the first one that comes to mind is Summer Rental w/ John Candy
4. Iron Chef
5. Clean them out completely and make giant mixed drinks in them.
posted by RC on 1-14-2008 at 9:51 am
1) I’m a high school student, hispanic, female. Enough said.
2) Hospital
3) Nightmare on Elm St. Bad acting, blood, and eery music. I thought I would love it for those three things, but alas, the bad acting was just tearjerking instead of gutwrenching. :(
4) America’s Next Top Model, there’s something about wafer thin girls playing dress up and crying a lot at inopportune times.
5) Send them to me, I’m an aspiring Graffiti Artist.
posted by Anna on 1-14-2008 at 11:58 am
1) I’m 20. I hate attention and making decisions. I’m far too moderate. I’m your typical college binge drinking goof-off.
2) D.P. Dough- a calzone place near campus. Not a place to get work done. Try the coffee shop.
3) The Fountain (I love Hugh Jackman). Besides that, it looked like a really interesting movie. It was terrible. Boring, not enough character development. It also tried too hard to be artsy.
4) Project Runway.
5) Pour the paint out to dry onto a big piece of plywood with some 2×4s glued to the perimeter to hold it in. Play with it. Layer the paint and make fun designs.(I used to do stage crew/set painting. Very fun.) Oh, and recycle the cans somehow.
posted by Laura on 1-15-2008 at 10:49 pm
1. I was committed to a mental hospital a few times as a teenager. But, I’ve been declared sane 6 times… that makes me 6 times more sane than the other candidates! (I also can’t buy a gun or join the army, but I can get a fishing license for free.)
2. Don’t use it.
3. Pirates of the Carribean 3. Too much hype.
4. Victoria Backham: Coming to America. Still haven’t been able to catch it in reruns. Shame.
5. Goodwill. I’d buy paint cans at a thrift store… if I needed them.
posted by Heather on 1-16-2008 at 10:19 am
1. Well, other than not being 35, plus I don’t actually live in the US, (I’m a citizen, and was born there, but I don’t think that I’ve actually ever spend 14 consecutive years in the US.) I couldn’t be president because it would mean giving up my French passport. When I was younger, I thought it would be cool to be president (I found it disconcerting that there were no female presidents.) Then I found out that I’d have to renounce my French citizenship, and decided I liked that more. Plus, I’d probably be a really bad president, putting all kinds of money into education and not all that much into defense. :)
posted by greenstrawberries on 1-23-2008 at 6:17 am