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One of the major disappointments I suffered this week was realizing I’d never heard about “Hollywood is Calling”–the phone service where “you can have a real celebrity make a live phone call to someone you know for just $19.95.” The correlative disappointment, being, of course, that I’ve never received such a call.
But! Now that I’m aware of its services, the next time I stumble upon any of their advertised occasions (”motivational call” or “just calling to say hi” but maybe not “thank you for the job interview”), I know where I’m turning. Sadly, it’s a little harder to get them to call at an exact time:
The celebrity may call minutes after you place your order or they may call approximately 7 days later. It’s entirely up to them and their schedule. They may call at any time day or night because they live in various time zones so it’s important for you to make certain the answering machine is always on.
So here’s what you’ve been waiting for: the directory of celebrities. (You might need a minute to recover.) Hmm…In lieu of actually calling on Mother’s Day (a popular holiday for HIC), maybe I’ll just have Mr. Belding check in on her. Anyone on this list you’d especially like to sic on someone?
Dude. The Soup Nazi. Him and the Lone Gunman guy from X-Files could be the start of a really a cool mix tape. :-)
posted by Soni on 1-16-2008 at 9:10 pm
I’ve heard of exactly two names from the list of those who will make calls.
posted by Jim on 1-16-2008 at 9:44 pm
Mr. B and I go way back. I remember one time I forgot my best friend’s birthday so me and my pals all decided to throw him a surprise party…..in Belding’s office! And who can forget the time Belding’s brother came to school, acting all cool. By the end of the day though we knew who really cared about us. Mr. B, you’re the greatest!
posted by ACMorrisKapowski on 1-16-2008 at 11:09 pm
If anyone of these people ever called me, I’d get a restraining order on them. Except for Lou Ferigno. You can never restrain the HULK!! Also, he’s the only person I’d ever heard of. The rest must be D-List celebrities.
posted by Bill on 1-17-2008 at 7:31 am
Glad I’m not totally out of touch – I only recognized two names on the list, also. Worse still, one of them (I’ll be nice and not reveal the name) I was frankly surprised was still alive.
posted by Roger on 1-17-2008 at 8:26 am
Sadly, as obscure as most of these names are, you’d need some sort of inside joke or a strange history for it to have any relevance at all.
e.g. “This would be perfect for my great aunt who has the entire “BJ and the Bear” series on VHS and holds and annual marathon to watch them all back to back.”
Makes Mr. Belding and The Hulk look like superstars. (I want the list that includes Johnny Depp, Jack Nicholson, and Julia Louis-Dreyfus.)
posted by Bre on 1-17-2008 at 8:40 am
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.
Eddie Munster and Timmy charge up to $300 for a phone call? Are you kidding me? Does anyone actually DO this?
Next stop, complete obscurity. Ticket please?
posted by mrs.djs on 1-17-2008 at 8:41 am
I love that so far I’ve seen two characters from “Zoobilee Zoo”.
What is this crap? This is glorious. I’m going to get the machete zombie from Dawn of the Dead to call my sister.
posted by Sarah on 1-17-2008 at 8:59 am
Oh, come on, who are half of these people? Is this the “My fifteen minutes are up and weren’t worth noting in the first place, but I’m going to try and get another 5 anyway” list? It would at least help if they had some sort of line about why they are “famous”.
I could see, as a joke, buying one of these for a friend or relative, say…
• Soup Nazi
• Skip from Family Ties
• Mr. Belding
• Eddie Munster (was that him?)
• Erin Gray (silver spoons, buck rogers)
• Lou Hulk Ferrigno
Why would anyone want a call from little timmy (lassie)? Who are those other people? Is that Richard Hatch from Survivor? What a joke!
posted by It's good to be the King on 1-17-2008 at 9:02 am
My brothers actually got me Mr. Belding for my birthday one year. Unfortunately I was at the gym when he called, but he did leave a voice mail.
My brothers said I had gotten good grades, and he was to compliment me on that, which added to the bizarreness of it all.
posted by Kevin on 1-17-2008 at 9:24 am
what an idea………..
they need to talk to OJ…..he needs the money and I am sure he would be happy to talk to anybody for a few bucks.
also how about Georg W Bush?? He could have time to explain his actions…
posted by al hott on 1-17-2008 at 9:28 am
It’s so bad on so many levels.
The guy from Buckaroo Banzai, was he John Whorfin, John Bigboote, John Emdall, John Parker, John O’Connor, John Gomez, John Yaya or John Gant?
Or maybe John Wright, John Wood, John Camp, John Grim, John Many Jars, John Coyote, John Jones, John Chief Crier, John Rajeesh, John Littlejohn, John Starbird, or John Lee?
posted by fixedgear on 1-17-2008 at 9:42 am
If you click on one of them, you can get to other pages that will let you look through the ones that are currently unavailable. Those are the real gems.
Todd Bridges, Kato Kaelin, Cindy Margolis, Lorenzo Lamas, Leon Spinks.
I’m fairly certain Kato Kaelin and Lorenzo Lamas have nothing but free time.
posted by Ryan on 1-17-2008 at 9:50 am
Sort of a former celeb telemarketing job.
I’ve actually heard of most of these people. And met some of them at an event they have a few times a year at the Beverly Garland Hotel in Los Angeles.
You meet the celeb and pay them $20.00 for an autographed picture if you want one. Lou Ferrigno was the only one who charged to even TAKE his pic. And got VERY pissy and rude if you asked him anything.
posted by Sheldon Siegel on 1-17-2008 at 10:01 am
I must watch too much tv cause I knew quite a few of those people.
So I can have “Eddie” (from the Courtship of Eddie’s Father) call my hubby on Father’s day.
And hubby can have Greg Evigan (BJ & The Bear — see blog on chimps today) or Chris Atkins (Blue Lagoon) call me on my birthday.
And I even know who Mary Badham is (haven’t you people ever watched “To Kill A Mockingbird”?
Oh yes, I have seen way too much tv in my life.
posted by beth on 1-17-2008 at 10:18 am
Wow, it’s really a toss up between Christopher Atkins (the guy from the Blue Lagoon and the Pirate Movie) and Russell Johnson (the Professor from Gilligan’s Island). Is the Professor still even alive?!
posted by Missy on 1-17-2008 at 11:04 am
I, too, recognized Mary Badham. And more than a few of the other “celebs.” Even Susan Gordon. As any “Twilight Zone” fan knows, she was the little crippled girl whose best friend was really a handsome prince from another planet, though he appeared to be a kindly old man on this planet. Russell Johnson was also on the “Zone.” As was Mary Badham! Watch and learn, people, watch and learn.
posted by Lori L. on 1-17-2008 at 11:47 am
I can get a phone call from Mr Belding, Eddie Munster, The Soup Nazi & The Incredible Hulk? AWESOME!
:)
posted by Clotho on 1-17-2008 at 12:38 pm
Thanks Lori…I feel better now knowing that there’s a tv-bie like me out there! ;)
posted by beth on 1-17-2008 at 1:42 pm
Forgot to add, I’m pretty sure it was Erin Gray in that wig ad from the Price Is Wrong Last week. Look at that face and put a bad wig on it and I think you’ll see I’m right.
posted by beth on 1-17-2008 at 1:53 pm
Does anyone else think it would be completely hilarious to have the Soup Nazi give a break-up call?
… or am I alone in my sick-and-twisted-individual-ness?
posted by Ashley on 1-17-2008 at 2:21 pm