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While movie musicals had their heyday in the 1940s through the 60s, by the 70s they were beginning to wane, and by 1980, they weren’t doing well at all. With the selection present at the time, however, it’s no big shock that they didn’t. Here are some of 1980’s notoriously cheesy musicals which haven’t gotten any better with age.
1. The Apple
It’s over the top. The best compliment you can give it is that it makes good use of sequins. And it’s set in the far off future…of 1994. Adapted from an Israeli stage play, The Apple is a heavy-handed biblical allegory about temptation that seems to think disco has no chance of ever dying. Audiences at the Los Angeles premiere loved the movie so much they threw their soundtracks at the screen, causing extensive damage. The only other positive thing about the movie is that none of its stars seems to have escaped with their careers intact; however, Nigel Lythgoe, the film’s choreographer, has gone on to produce American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance. Did I mention that the end of the movie consists of God taking the protagonists away in his magic sky Cadillac? It’s not to be missed.
2. Can’t Stop the Music
Filmed at the height of 1979’s disco craze and produced by Allan Carr (coming off of the massive success of Grease), Can’t Stop the Music had the unfortunate luck of being released after disco had already peaked and was starting to experience a backlash. Directed by Nancy Walker (best known as Ida on the TV show Rhoda) and starring The Village People in a pseudo-biography of their start, the film was actually award-winning. Don’t worry, we’re not talking Oscars here. 1980 was the year the Golden Raspberry Awards started. CSTM took home the first “Worst Picture” and “Worst Screenplay” awards given out by the group, and was nominated for 5 others.
3. Xanadu
This one seems to have all the right pieces. Olivia Newton-John, fresh from her success in the film version of Grease? Check. Music from Electric Light Orchestra (ELO) during the high point of their career? Check. Gene Kelly? Check. So what happened? Well, much like the previous 2 entries on the list, Xanadu celebrated Disco at a time when no one else did. Add a completely unbelievable plot (muses…rollerskating…huh?) and you’ve got a turkey on your hands. Xanadu cost $20 million to make, and barely made it back. The movie has had some luck recently, though. A Broadway version (complete with roller-skates and tongue-in-cheek references to the original) continues to do well, recently receiving 4 Tony nominations/awards.
4. Popeye
Shame on you, Robert Altman. You can do better. We’re looking at you too, Robin Williams and Shelley Duvall. While the film made double its budget in the end, critics and word-of-mouth kept many filmgoers away from the theaters after opening weekend. Harry Nilsson’s score was derided as unintelligible, and Altman’s career suffered through most of the 1980s as a result of the movie’s poor performance. Everyone eventually experienced a resurgence in their career’s popularity (Altman with The Player, Duvall with The Shining, and Robin Williams with…being Robin Williams), but Popeye still stands as a blemish on their careers.
5. The Jazz Singer
Neil Diamond is a respected musician with a long career. The Jazz Singer is best known as being the first talking motion picture. But much like oil and water, these two don’t mix well. Starring Diamond, Laurence Olivier (who stated he only did it for the money), and Lucie Arnaz, the vanity picture has an atrocious script, overly sappy songs, and horrible acting. The soundtrack was more successful than the movie, which was nominated for 5 Golden Raspberry awards and won 2 for “Worst Actor” (Neil Diamond) and “Worst Supporting Actor” (Laurence Olivier).
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Comments (25)
Comment
Great post.
Until now, I’ve never really realized that all those films came out in the same year…never heard of “The Apple” before.
posted by Zane on 7-9-2008 at 2:19 pm
I’m a total dork, but I think Popeye was awesome.
posted by Jill Harness on 7-9-2008 at 2:21 pm
Say what you will, my family and I loved XANADU. We saw it first (of three times) at the mall opening weekend. Several people walked over to the record store to buy the soundtrack album. Several songs from the score are standards on ’soft rock’ stations. That movie was greatness!
posted by Paul on 7-9-2008 at 2:28 pm
I saw Popeye in the theater when it first came out. I thought it was awesome. Of course, I was 6 years old at the time. What the hell did I know?
posted by hifidigitalboy on 7-9-2008 at 3:21 pm
I watched Xanadu over and over as a kid–call me strange if you will. However, I will say that many of the musicals I love, I love only for the music. And the music from Xanadu is AWESOME. :-D
posted by nutmeag on 7-9-2008 at 3:47 pm
I loved Xanadu.
Oh well.
posted by Christy on 7-9-2008 at 4:13 pm
I love The Jazz Singer, myself. And by “myself” I mean I’m the one guy. I’d never recommend it, though. And the scene where the band performs in blackface is just wrong.
posted by Johnny Cat on 7-9-2008 at 4:26 pm
Nice post…
I had never heard of Xanadu until I came across it on TV a couple of months ago. I found it, literally, dumbfounding, but, my wife had seen it before and explained it to me. I ended up enjoying it, if for nothing else, its mindnumbing plot.
I also remember going to see Popeye in the theatre when I was a kid. I was excited, because, well, it was Popeye. But once the movie started and the singing kicked in, I remember being (the 6-year old equivilant) of WTF am I watching?
posted by Florida on 7-9-2008 at 4:51 pm
In agreement with some others. I like Popeye. It’s a fine little movie and have enjoyed it through repeated viewings.
Cannot speak for myself on Xanadu. But I had a manager who absolutely loved it. But he had to be drunk first.
posted by Todd S. on 7-9-2008 at 5:24 pm
I loved Xanadu when it came out. I was 11 at the time and rollerskated around the neighborhood in a flowing skirt and leg warmers, singing “Magic” and pretending to be Olivia Newton-John.
My sister found the movie on DVD (I believe it was in the $5 bin at Wal-Mart)and gave it to me for Christmas. I was horrified at how bad it was. Bad plot, bad acting and bad special effects. But my 8-year old daughter loved it! Evidently it should have been marketed to 7-13 year old girls and it would have made back some of the money.
One thing I found interesting - Sandhal Bergman was one of the muses. Evidently pre-Conan the Barbarian.
posted by bzzyb on 7-9-2008 at 5:28 pm
My ex boyfriend’s favorite musical is Xanadu. ‘Nuff said.
posted by Silva on 7-9-2008 at 5:36 pm
What about the sequel to Grease…. Grease 2! That came out in 1982. When I first watched it, I thought it was great: motorcycles, catchy songs, and a very hot, very young Michelle Pfeiffer.
When I saw it again some years ago, I was thinking “why in the hell did I like this movie so much???” The songs were so full of sexual tones…of course I didn’t get the innuendoes being so young. And the singing was horrid! I’m glad Michelle Pfeiffer still can get jobs acting, because she ain’t no Carrie Underwood!
posted by RT on 7-9-2008 at 5:51 pm
The Apple is actually one of my favorite movies. Part of what makes it amazing is its ability to consistently become more and more over the top. It’s definitely worth a bargain bin pick-up.
I know that 6-year-old me loved Xanadu and Popeye as well–I may need to re-rent them to see if those feelings are the same now that I’m 14 years older.
And even though I’m a huge fan of Mystery Science Theater 3000, I’m not sure I even want to touch Can’t Stop the Music. Any brave souls who’ve seen it want to comment on whether it lives up to its (bad) name?
posted by Ben Smith on 7-9-2008 at 10:32 pm
Hey there, Xanadu fans. No more digging through the bargain racks at Wal-Mart or scouring ebay. You can now watch the whole movie online. Yes, really. Go to hulu.com/watch/25885/xanadu.
posted by collier on 7-10-2008 at 12:43 am
The Jazz Singer is so so so so bad, it rolls right back around to awesome. I believe the word “craptastic” was coined for it.
HEE! reCaptcha = “low volume”
posted by Rachel on 7-10-2008 at 7:33 am
@collier: I was about to post that myself! I was so excited when I saw it last night. I’m actually watching it right now at work, hehe. Hulu is pure awesomeness.
posted by nutmeag on 7-10-2008 at 8:49 am
I loved “The Apple.” An acquaintance of mine pointed out one of the many, many logical issues with the film: It’s a glam-disco-rock musical that’s anti-glam, anti-disco, and anti-rock. You’re supposed to regard the folk singers as righteous, and the glam-disco singers as eeeevil. The costumes are also hilariously hideous; allegedly, some of them were made with spandex and garbage bags. (Okay, that might be a joke, but who knows?) And finally, it deserves mention that the eeevil mogul’s henchman was so ridiculously camp that it was unbelievable. I swear, he had silver lipstick on.
posted by Sillstaw on 7-10-2008 at 11:17 am
I heard about Xanadu on some VH1 special (or something) a couple years ago, and all I could think was, “These people took this seriously?” The moral of the story: Sondheim and Bernstein made movie musicals work. You’re not Sondheim and Bernstein.
reCAPTCHA: “feets stummick” Sounds like my martial arts class.
posted by Joanna on 7-10-2008 at 11:45 am
Popeye should NOT be on this list.
I have this on laser disc.
posted by Erik on 7-10-2008 at 12:13 pm
Neil Diamond is infallible.
posted by dcm on 7-10-2008 at 4:51 pm
Oh and so close on the heels of Mae West’s 1978 swan song Sextette. In which she’s seen in a swan-shaped bed. Best line in Xanadu? Something like, “How can you say Xanadu doesn’t matter?” Let me count the ways. Come on…Olivia Newton-John and Gene Kelly on Roller skates? I’m in!
posted by jmy9595 on 7-11-2008 at 8:27 am
Anyone seeking to laugh until they cough blood would be wise to seek out Nathan Rabin’s review of The Apple for the My Year of Flops feature over at the avclub dot com.
Great great stuff
posted by EMStoveken on 7-11-2008 at 4:38 pm
I heard in an interview that Popeye was the favorite movie of Robin William’s mother. And you can’t argue with someone’s mother.
posted by Jill on 7-12-2008 at 1:39 am
And here I thought I was going to be the lone voice defending Popeye! Heck, I still love the songs, and I understand the town they shot it in (over in–where was it?–Malta?) is a major tourist site even today. It just IMO wasn’t what people were expecting, and you got the Dogpile Effect you sometimes get with these things.
That being said, Can’t Stop The Music? Awful.
posted by Just Kelly on 8-4-2008 at 10:07 pm
I watched The Apple, Xanadu, and Sgt. Pepper one day back to back to back. I’ve never been quite the same.
posted by Brian on 8-13-2008 at 6:28 pm