Sometimes false advertising is easy to spot. Statements like “Lose 20 pounds in 5 days” or “Make $1 million a month while sitting at home” seem to choke on their own incredulity, but sometimes marketers employ a little more finesse to bamboozle you. Here are six examples of shamelessly false advertising campaigns that weren’t just implicitly misleading—they were blatant lies.
1. Listerine as a Cure-All
Listerine was the first over-the-counter mouthwash sold in the United States in 1914 and by 1921 it was already falsely marketing its product. Declaring itself a cure-all for common cold ailments like sore throats and coughs, a dandruff preventative, an anti-shave tonic, and a safe way to protect yourself from cuts, bruises, wounds, and stings, Listerine was slapped with numerous false advertisement lawsuits. In 1975, the Federal Trade Commission ordered the company to spend $10 million in corrective advertising, seeing as their product was no more effective in treating colds than gargling warm water. Even then, the mouthwash giant didn’t really learn their lesson. In 2005, the company was slapped with another lawsuit. This time because Listerine claimed it was as “effective as floss” after rigging clinical trials.
2. Lydia Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound (Great for boozy housewives!)
Touted as one of the world’s first successful businesswomen, Lydia Pinkham exploited her reputation as a local medicine woman to propel her herbal remedy into a commercial success, eventually grossing almost $400,000 yearly. The remedy claimed to cure all womanly ailments and weaknesses and sold for $1 a bottle. What was in the herbal remedy? Turns out, it contained less than 1% solid substance from vegetable extracts and almost 20% alcohol. If a woman took the suggested 1 tablespoon every 2-4 hours, she will have consumed 5 ounces of 13.5% or higher alcohol by the end of the day – more than enough for a healthy buzz that made life seem a bit more cheery to boozy housewives. When the Federal Trade Commission tightened its laws on claims made by medicines, Lydia Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound had to swallow the restrictions with a spoonful of sugar.
3. Crystal Clear Amoco Gasoline: Good, Clean Fun
In 1996, the Amoco Oil Company agreed to settle a Federal Trade Commission charge that its “Crystal Clear Amoco Ultimate” advertised unsubstantiated claims. The premium gasoline, because of its clear color, boasted superior engine performance and environmental benefits. The fact is, at the time the country was going through a clear revolution. Pepsi had gone clear (Crystal clear, in fact!). Clearly Canadian was dominating shelves. And Amoco, which had for years made a clear colored fuel, decided to capitalize on the trend. Unfortunately, they had no factual evidence to substantiate their “better for the environment and your engine” claims, and the company was forced to curb their campaign.
4. Dr. Koch’s Cure All
Starting in 1919, Dr. William Frederick Koch bottled and marketed a cancer, infection, and allergy cure-all with the help of his brother Louis. His drug glyoxylide, which he claimed cured “practically all human ills, including . . . tuberculosis” sold for $25 (1948 price) in local drug stores. The FDA had always been suspicious of the doctor, but not until they tested the drug in 1948 and found it contained nothing more than distilled water were their suspicions confirmed. And what proved to be more appalling, they discovered that Dr. Koch had been treating cancer patients by telling them to detox with the aid of enemas and fresh fruit and vegetable juices, taking only the smallest doses of painkillers. Unfortunately, despite all of his patients dying enough evidence was never found to present a viable case against him, and Dr. Koch moved to Rio de Janeiro in the late 1940s.
5. Airborne Gets a Flunking Grade
“It’s the one designed by the school teacher!” Airborne, which entered the market 10 years ago first claimed to prevent colds, then claimed to boost your immune system, and is now claiming a federal lawsuit. In March of this year, Airborne settled a lawsuit in which it agreed to pay over $23 million in fines for false advertising. David Schardt, who spearheaded the lawsuit against Airborne says there is no factual evidence to back the companies claims, likening Airborne to a placebo and advising people fighting colds to simply take a Vitamin C pill.
6. The Trick Wedding straight from Mickey Blue Eyes
We know this one isn’t a product, but the story was so good we had to include it. In September 1990, a group of drug crime suspects in Corunna, Michigan, received an invitation to a wedding from a well–known drug dealer in the area. Attendees were asked to check their guns at the entrance, apparently a common occurrence at these events. As part of a five-month undercover investigation, the police staged and advertised a wedding on a Friday night, figuring it was easier to make drug suspects come to them than to round them up. The groom was an undercover investigator, the bride a Flint police officer, and the bride’s father (and reputed crime boss) was the police chief. That evening, after the vows, the toasts, and the dancing, the band, called SPOC, or COPS spelled backward, played “Fought the Law,” setting off the cue for the evening’s real agenda. All the police officers were then asked to stand, and those who remained seated were arrested. A dozen suspects were booked and, by Saturday afternoon, 16 were in custody.
Portions of this story were excerpted from Forbidden Knowledge, which is available from our store.
Comments (43)
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This is along the lines of Mickey Blue Eyes, but Washington, D.C. cops did a similar sting offering Washington Redskins tickets to people they were trying to round up. Those tickets were hard to get and they rounded up a bunch of people with warrants that day. I think I’ve also heard similar stories. More?
posted by Karen on 12-31-2008 at 10:05 am
Bring back Crystal Pepsi!
posted by Diana on 12-31-2008 at 10:22 am
I agree, Diana.
Man, I used to love Clearly Canadian back in the day. I tried it again a few years ago, only to discover they put sucralose in it, and I hate fake sugar.
Wikipedia claims they stopped doing that, so maybe it’s time to try it again :)
posted by Leah on 12-31-2008 at 11:12 am
I still think the best is Lysol. Back in the day it marketed as a cure-all, and women were advised to use it as a douche. Ouch.
posted by Kathe on 12-31-2008 at 1:57 pm
Lydia’s last name is actually Pinkham. (Hint: It’s printed on the box.)
posted by Judy on 12-31-2008 at 2:26 pm
Great story, Kristen! Clearly the I Love Lucy VitamitaVegimine episode was based on a real-life-product.
I wonder what TV show Airborne will reappear on.
posted by David H. on 12-31-2008 at 3:50 pm
“Let’s drink a drink a drink
To Lily the Pink, the Pink, the Pink
Saviour of the human ra-a-ace.
For she invented medicinal compound
Efficacious in every case”
I’ve forgotten the rest of the song, but it does reference the alcohol content, because the last line of the last verse is “sadly, pickled Lily died.”
posted by jess B on 12-31-2008 at 5:58 pm
Oh, Listerine…don’t you know nothing is as effective as _floss?
posted by Johnny Cat on 12-31-2008 at 9:52 pm
Amoco did offer lead-free “white gas” from the pump at a time when the others only had leaded gas.
posted by cyber_rigger on 1-1-2009 at 12:14 pm
I was ashamed to see Airborne @ Costco. I thought such a reputable place of great deals and customer service would be above scammy crap. Alas, they’ve also carried Kevin Trudeau books in the past, so they’re not above such bastard quackery.
Incidentally, my reCAPTCHA of the day is “sane endear”.
posted by Torley on 1-1-2009 at 8:33 pm
A current shamelessly false ad campaign claims that the Cadillac Escalade gets better in-town gas mileage than the Mini Cooper. Seriously. I suppose if you’re rolling it downhill …
posted by Tony Steidler-Dennison on 1-1-2009 at 8:52 pm
You forgot to mention the Acai Berry Diet Pill “Free Trial” scam that bills you $80+ a month…
posted by frank adams on 1-1-2009 at 9:10 pm
As with many of our societal blunders, false or misleading advertising is one of our achilles’ heels. We’ve all seen countless infomercials that promise superior performance and benefit, but deliver inferior results. And now things are worse than ever; now, as we as Americans are in our worst state economically since the Great Depression, corporations are scrambling more than ever to sell their products to us at a higher price, even if it means sprinkling false advertising around their products to do so.
posted by Michael D. on 1-2-2009 at 12:12 am
How about Gillian McKeith advertising herself as a Doctor, when she actually purchased her PhD from a non accredited institution?
posted by Ciaran on 1-2-2009 at 6:01 am
Vitemin C also doesn’t cure colds so that’s false advertisement in itself.
posted by Andrew on 1-2-2009 at 9:45 am
True, but it is good for your immune system so at least it can mount a strong defense.
posted by Chris on 1-2-2009 at 2:59 pm
But Listerine does help with dandruff. I use it when I take a shower and im flake free bitches!
posted by triXter on 1-2-2009 at 7:30 pm
I feel violated to discover that they don’t really drink Um Bongo in the Congo, nor will some bloke offer to be my dog if I wave a bottle of Kia-Ora around.
posted by Pat on 1-7-2009 at 11:05 am
I must take issue with the treatment of Dr Koch’s Cure-All, it’s quite clearly a highly -efficient homeopathic remedy, they just didn’t have the ability to recognise it as such at the time. Or it was a conspiracy by scientists to cover up the truth. Or something like that :)
posted by Cannonball Jones on 1-13-2009 at 9:54 am
Anyone remember that old SNL commercial for Crystal Gravy? That summed up the country’s “clear” obsession perfectly.
posted by zepher on 1-13-2009 at 12:56 pm
I think using listerine everday is what has kept my hairline from receding none of my brothers use it but i do and i’m the only one without a receding hairline
posted by Healthy Guy on 1-31-2009 at 12:27 pm
The most outrageous one of all is Dr. John R. “Goat Glands” Brinkley, who performed over 16,000 goat testicle transplants … into human men! The claim was that aged men could regain youthful vigor and the legendary randiness of goats. It made him fabulously rich. He also had his own radio station, and a chain of pharmacies based on his quackery.
But oh, hey, if we’re talking false advertising, walk into any church and listen to the stories THEY tell.
posted by Hank Fox on 2-14-2009 at 11:26 pm
Reposting this: Didn’t seem to go through …
The most outrageous one of all is Dr. John R. “Goat Glands” Brinkley, who performed over 16,000 goat testicle transplants … into human men! The claim was that aged men could regain youthful vigor and the legendary randiness of goats. It made him fabulously rich. He also had his own radio station, and a chain of pharmacies based on his quackery.
But oh, hey, if we’re talking false advertising, walk into any church and listen to the stories THEY tell.
posted by Hank Fox on 2-14-2009 at 11:28 pm
Yes zepher!!
It was a gross SNL commercial, too. I loved it.
What about cookie doe sport? It’s another favorite of mine since gatorade is now sugar…and salt.
posted by Kels on 9-9-2009 at 4:09 pm
Does anyone remember the Subaru commercials where one of their cars was run over by a monster truck and didn’t collapse? They found later that Subaru had put a roll cage in the car.
posted by Julie on 9-11-2009 at 2:51 am
I don’t think it was Subaru that put the roll cage in it’s car before having the moster truck roll over it. I think that was actually Volvo.
posted by Bruce on 9-16-2009 at 11:54 am
“And Amoco, which had for years made a clear colored fuel, decided to capitalize on the trend”
Come on now, a CLEAR COLORED fuel? Do you realize how stupid that sounds?
posted by R Brown on 9-28-2009 at 8:55 am
“False advertising” is redundant.
Btw pretty much all religion and politics are “false advertising.” Believing in yourself and your loved ones seems to fulfill anything a “god” or “government” can do. Discuss.
posted by Rob on 12-7-2009 at 6:39 pm
[...] Diet deserves a place in the marketing hall of fame, right next to the dudes who conjured up the Crystal Clear Amoco Ultimate premium gasoline (”better for the environment”!) and the Cheerios heart-healthy [...]
posted by The Taco Bell Drive-Thru Diet: You Don’t Even Have to Lift Your Ass from the Car to Lose Weight! - Young & Hungry - Washington City Paper on 1-8-2010 at 9:53 am
5 ounces of 13% alcohol = 1 glass of wine. Hardly enough to make someone tipsy over the course of a whole day.
Now, drinking the bottle…
posted by Yogi on 1-18-2010 at 12:48 pm
Maybe there’s been too much in the news about healthcare, but the guy in the picture with the bandages looks like President Obama.
posted by Shelly on 3-24-2010 at 2:21 pm
I was told by a old car guy that gas producers used to put a coloring agent in their gas to identify who’s gas was who’s, to keep theft down I guess. Each of the big gas companies had their own color, you could look at the build up of color in the engine and tell what gas the car owner used, Amoco’s color was clear, or no color. which was supposed to make it the best cause it did not stain your engine.
posted by color code on 3-30-2010 at 8:26 am
In the heyday of clear products, I am almost positive that I saw an advertisement on tv for clear bug killer. My jaw nearly dropped to the ground thinking of all of the people who would ingest this crap. I am glad the clear revolution is long gone.
posted by elynorah on 3-30-2010 at 11:54 am
Awwww, now you’ve got me jonesing for a blackberry Clearly Canadian. I miss those so bad, and it’s virtually impossible to find. Do they still even make the stuff? If they do I need to find a place and stock up!
posted by Kristina the bureaucrat on 4-30-2010 at 1:27 pm
Even though I have earned a Ph.D in Quantum Physics and thus I am considered a scientist, I have come to the conclusion over the last few years that really ALL advertising is false advertising. My experience with the unconditional freedom process demonstrates that if I (or anyone else) want to be free from some unwanted condition, I have to be willing to be free from it, thus real freedom is always self-created
(How could freedom that depends on something else be called freedom anyway; I call that dependency, no matter what–whether the product was falsely advertised or not).
By unwanted condition, I mean any condition in a person’s life that she/he feels bad about and is trying to get rid of. This could be anything being experienced such as the conditions mentioned in this post–ailments, weaknesses, poor or average engine performance, environmental pollution, cancer, infections, allergies, colds, weak immune system, human ills, etc.
Of course, the lies perpetrated by ALL businesses, companies and individuals marketing anything (to try to change people’s minds) and using language such as “This product will do XXX for you, our company will produce YYYY benefit for you”, “I will solve your ZZZZZ problem”, etc. all those lies are possible simply because everyone perpetrates such lies, and thus there is a common agreement to “close an eye” or ignore the lies of those we jive with.
Our very existence and identity depends on perpetrating such lies, so in that sense, it’s OK.
The only reason some people are able to get rich at the expense of others is that these people are smart enough to listen to their market and respond in a way that makes them known, liked and trusted by the people in that market, and thus they are able to get away with their lies.
And if they are also good at promotion (at getting people in that market to change their behavior), they will sell a lot of their products and/or services, even though the latter are not really what creates the benefits that these people want (or rather these products and/or services are not what takes away the problems that these people have, which I call unwanted conditions).
posted by Dr Claude Windenberger on 7-9-2010 at 7:22 pm
Let’s not forget Bach flower remedies. Nothing but water and alcohol.
posted by Michael McConnell on 8-6-2010 at 4:32 am
Lydia Pinkham’s vegetable compound must have been the inspiration for the “Vitameatavegamin” I Love Lucy Episode. Anyone see that one? She gets drunk while filming a commercial for the “healthy” elixir. Oh, Lucy!
posted by scribbles on 10-4-2010 at 10:41 am
Hehe I remember in a Simpsons Episode where Otto went into “Stoners Pot Palace” and realized it was a place that sold cookware and said “This is blatant false advertising!” ahahahaha!!
posted by Rina on 11-9-2010 at 4:12 pm
“We’ll drink a drink a drink
To Lily the Pink the Pink the Pink
The saviour of the human race
For she invented medicinal compound
Most efficacious in every case.
Mr. Frears
had sticky-out ears
and it made him awful shy
and so they gave him medicinal compound
and now he’s learning how to fly.
Brother Tony
Was notably bony
He would never eat his meals
And so they gave him medicinal compound
Now they move him round on wheels.
We’ll drink a drink a drink
To Lily the Pink the Pink the Pink
The saviour of the human race
For she invented medicinal compound
Most efficacious in every case.
Old Ebeneezer
Thought he was Julius Caesar
And so they put him in a Home
where they gave him medicinal compound
and now he’s Emperor of Rome.
Johnny Hammer
Had a terrible stammer
He could hardly say a word
And so they gave him medicinal compound
Now he’s seen (but never heard)!
We’ll drink a drink a drink
To Lily the Pink the Pink the Pink
The saviour of the human race
For she invented medicinal compound
Most efficacious in every case.
Auntie Millie
Ran willy-nilly
When her legs, they did recede
And so they rubbed on medicinal compound
And now they call her Millipede.
Jennifer Eccles
had terrible freckles
and the boys all called her names
but she changed with medicinal compound
and now he joins in all their games.
We’ll drink a drink a drink
To Lily the Pink the Pink the Pink
The saviour of the human race
For she invented medicinal compound
Most efficacious in every case.
Lily the Pink, she
Turned to drink, she
Filled up with paraffin inside
and despite her medicinal compound
Sadly Picca-Lily died.
Up to Heaven
Her soul ascended
All the church bells they did ring
She took with her medicinal compound
Hark the herald angels sing.
Oooooooooooooooo Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee’ll drink a drink a drink
To Lily the Pink the Pink the Pink
The saviour of the human race
For she invented medicinal compound
Most efficacious in every case”
posted by EveL on 2-6-2011 at 8:01 pm
My mom (RIP) never got the memo about Listerine! She also thought the Vicks Vaporub would cure everything!
posted by Tammy King on 4-29-2011 at 5:18 pm
Easy Dr Claude! lol
You are a bit cynical, and a trite cliche. Loosen up, not every advert is false…what about the little kid dressed up as Vader and he starts the car with the Force, real as real can be :-)
My take is that people like Kevin Trudeau and Gillian McKeith do have reasonable foundations. The former stole those common sense principles and tries to sell it. Thing is he is correct in that FDA and drug companies want to keep us on medicine, and if we took care of ourselves better and knew natural plants that could help with ailments we’d be better off. It helped our ancestors long long ago…
As for McKeith, she is a holistic doctor, she has a MA and PHd, just in what many would say is hokum science.
However, she has a point as well…eat healthy, walk, lots of vegetables and fruits…stay away from caffeine. She essentially made Buddhism/Taoism philosophies into a diet.
I know for myself that when I became ill this year, the more medicine I was given, the sicker I got…I rested, forced myself to walk and eat only beans, rice and vegetables…low and behold, I got better w/o side effects.
Would that cure me of cancer? Not at all…but for a non life threat, always fuel your body, excercise and mentally rest w/o a legalized drug dealer.
BTW, windex according to Big Fat Greek wedding is a cure all
posted by James on 6-28-2011 at 2:52 pm
Can’t ever listen to “I Fought The Law” without thinking of that sting operation. Now there’s one for the boys in blue.
posted by Panda Rosa on 8-10-2011 at 10:54 pm
Another large lawsuit was against LifeLock for their advertising of Todd Davis’ SSN in the commercial. They had to change the way they advertise as well.
posted by Nikki on 9-8-2011 at 2:49 pm