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There have been enough cheesy ballads written about it over the milennia that by now it’s a well-established fact: love can get you in trouble, drive you crazy, ruin your life. Love is a drug, a high, and it puts blinders on people. Etc Etc ad infinitum — though as tiresomely cliche as it all sounds, it’s true, too. According to the latest issue of Nature, another love-song cliche is about to come true: neuroscientists are actually sort of close to finding the long-mythical pharmaceutical “love potion.”
The article speculates that “human love is set off by a ‘biochemical chain of events’ that originally evolved in ancient brain circuits involving mother-child bonding, which is stimulated in mammals by the release of oxytocin during labor, delivery and nursing.” (That same hormone release evolved to become the bonding agent between males and females, too.) Researchers have found that by squirting oxytocin into people’s nostrils, they can enhance feelings of trust and empathy. If that sounds like the beginning of a love potion to you, it does to doctors as well, who say that we could soon find medications in pharmacies to “increase people’s urge to fall in love.”
But honestly, who really needs that? (And doesn’t the existence of such a drug create the temptation to give it to other people without their knowledge?) Some doctors argue that such drugs could be invaluable in conjunction with marital therapy, and while I’ll grant them that, it seems like the potential for misuse is enormous.
What makes more sense, it seems, would be a love vaccine. As John Tierney writes in the New York Times:
Could any discovery be more welcome? This is what humans have sought ever since Odysseus ordered his crew to tie him to the mast while sailing past the Sirens. Long before scientists identified neuroreceptors, long before Britney Spears’ quickie Vegas wedding or any of Larry King’s seven marriages, it was clear that love was a dangerous disease.
Love was correctly identified as a potentially fatal chemical imbalance in the medieval tale of Tristan and Isolde, who accidentally consumed a love potion and turned into hopeless addicts. Even though they realized that her husband, the king, would punish adultery with death, they had to have their love fix.
I doubt many people would want to permanently suppress love, but a temporary vaccine could come in handy. Spouses going through midlife crises would not be so quick to elope with their personal trainers; elderly widowers might consult their lawyers before marrying someone resembling Anna Nicole Smith. Love is indeed a many-splendored thing, but sometimes we all need to tie ourselves to the mast.
What do you think — would you want a love potion, a love vaccine — or neither?
Comments (19)
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The idea of a “Love Perfume” sounds an awful lot like that forgetable Sandra Bullock\Tate Donovan movie… and we all know how it turned out for them at the end of the film…
Misuse..yes
Unintended side effects… DEFINITELY
posted by Goliath The Pickle on 1-16-2009 at 12:57 pm
A “love potion” just sounds like a really, _REALLY_ bad idea.
posted by Karen on 1-16-2009 at 1:14 pm
V-A-C-C-I-N-E !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by loosepaint on 1-16-2009 at 1:21 pm
In my opinion many people have lost what love really is between TV, Internet, Celebrities, Music, and Romance Novels. Chick Flicks and Fabio create problems from the very start because they create the idea that love is a fairytale of haughty sex scenes, chivalry, and sweet talk. No one thinks before they get married ‘Who is going to make a good Team Mate?’ ‘Who can I trust with my innermost secrets?’ ‘Am I comfortable taking a poop just a room away from him/her when they might be able to hear me?’… I think a love potion or an anti-love potion wouldn’t be needed if many people knew what love and long-term devotion were in the first place. We live in a media-based generation where our parents sometimes aren’t the best examples (my mother has been married and divorced 6 times). It could be a good idea for breeding animals in captivity who are endangered, but I believe that the problem isn’t a chemical imbalance. Many people are stupid, and chemicals don’t fix stupidity unfortunately…
posted by Kate on 1-16-2009 at 1:23 pm
Anti-love potion? I’d rather see a potion that eliminates the rose-colored glasses so you could better know the person you were falling for for who they really are. That way if you are going to fall in love with a jerk at least you’d have no excuse for not knowing it first.
posted by karen on 1-16-2009 at 1:53 pm
“No one thinks before they get married ‘Who is going to make a good Team Mate?’ ‘Who can I trust with my innermost secrets?’ ‘Am I comfortable taking a poop just a room away from him/her when they might be able to hear me?’”
That was certainly true when I got married when I was 25. Unfortunately he died 4 1/2 years later and in the 5 1/2 years since that, I found someone new… someone with whom I SPECIFICALLY asked myself those questions, as well as many more, over because it was not going to be a rush of emotions and puppy-dog love but something that was going to last forever and mean something which had a whole new, and more complicated, set of standards and requirements.
Fortunately, he passed all those questions :-D
posted by Sarah on 1-16-2009 at 2:01 pm
“That way if you are going to fall in love with a jerk at least you’d have no excuse for not knowing it first.”
I think most people know the other may not be who or what they really want but ignore it and go full steam anyway… I know I did when I got married and I was in the middle of trying to correct that so we could both find people who made us happy when he died.
posted by Sarah on 1-16-2009 at 2:03 pm
Wow if I’d had that vaccine in college, maybe I wouldn’t have dropped out ;) Where do I sign up to be a guinea pig?
posted by Annie-Renee on 1-16-2009 at 2:26 pm
Brilliant, Kate! Truer words have never been spoken!
Messing about with oxytocin makes me nervous though… not just for potential misuse but possible unexpected side effects if it becomes a mainstream thing. We’re talking about a mood altering chemical here… what would the body do if subjected to continual increased amounts of the hormone present in the body?
posted by Jason! on 1-16-2009 at 2:34 pm
Kate hit the nail on the head. Media (in all of it’s many forms) has completely distorted the truth about love, marriage, and companionship for generations worth of people. A perfect love story is expected, and when their mate does not fulfill… it’s divorce city.
Another thing that irks me, and TV shows are particularly bad about this, is how they portray couples getting along after the “honeymoon” is over. Men roll their eyes at their wives. Women snoop and create undue drama. Both talk badly about their partners to their friends and family. Both mock and make fun of one another. This is SO unhealthy. Unfortunately, I frequently see this trend reflected in my friends and acquaintances and it makes me ill. The person I chose to marry is of the utmost importance to me. Not only do I love him and trust him, but I respect him too much to treat him that way.
posted by Renis on 1-16-2009 at 2:46 pm
Speaking of LOVE, any news on the possible mental_floss love connection that was going on here about a week or so ago? We’d like updates!
posted by TC on 1-16-2009 at 2:50 pm
A better target for medications: something to overcome the hangover from a bad romance. (I mean one that’s not a controlled substance).
posted by Michelle on 1-16-2009 at 2:53 pm
Is there a potion that closes my ears while my wife poops in the other room. Now that would sell!!!
posted by Jack on 1-16-2009 at 2:58 pm
That “feeling” isn’t love anyway. Love is a verb. It is an action. You don’t feel love, you show love. Forget about what you are feeling, it never lasts unless it coupled with thoughtful respect of the person you FEEL things with.
The last thing we need is something that makes MORE people FEEL love. Instead we need to teach people what true love is.
reCAPTCHA: causes regret
posted by Karen on 1-16-2009 at 4:06 pm
I need the vaccine, or maybe even a rose colored glasses removal service.
posted by Christina on 1-16-2009 at 4:41 pm
nah…i think a anti love drug would b better…a drug to fall out of love. helpful for breakups or clingy girlfriends
posted by Lauren on 1-16-2009 at 9:52 pm
as my dear, departed, and massively wise grandmommy said: “Love heightens all senses but common.”
sign me up for the vaccine, i’ve given the universe enough opportunities to kick me in the hind-end.
reCAPTCHA:
Frida inaccessible
seems mri is inaccessible as well… :-)
posted by mri on 1-16-2009 at 10:45 pm
Inoculate. In fact, given how horrid some relationships turn out because people prefer to think chemical overdrive equals truth, I’d say throw the vaccine in the drinking water. Maybe then, people will assess their mates more critically and less hormonally. If nothing else, it could dampen the horrors of raging hormones and teen angst.
Besides, have we all forgotten “roofies”? What use is a love-potion if all it does is induce false emotions, or to put it bluntly, deceive?
posted by innoculate on 1-17-2009 at 1:09 am
Any “love potion” is another dangerous confusion of the words “love” and “lust.” A chemical may induce feelings of desire and trust, but that’s not love. We’ve gotten so confused these days, thinking that a good relationship is based on warm feelings, instead of the respect, patience, kindness, honesty, and perseverance that actually make them work.
My parents have been married for over thirty years. They aren’t just lovers, but best friends, confidants, and colleagues. Somehow, I think a “love potion” would have been more hindrance than help – it would have clouded all the good sense they needed to make their marriage work.
posted by Andrea on 1-17-2009 at 11:06 pm