Comments (80)

1. I have two more for you:
   1) Clipping their nails
   2) Clipping their toenails
   –no joke.

   posted by Reed on 3-12-2009 at 3:40 pm

2. I used to sit near a coworker who make ALL his phone calls on speaker phone. Every conversation was SCREAMED into the phone. I fantasized about grabbing his phone receiver and beating him with it.

   posted by Casey Becher on 3-12-2009 at 3:41 pm

3. I hate it when the entire office goes football crazy. Perhaps that’s only a problem here in Buckeye Land…

   posted by Mandragora on 3-12-2009 at 3:45 pm

4. Using speakerphones!

   posted by TL on 3-12-2009 at 3:45 pm

5. I agree with the nail clippings. My BOSS does that, and it’s quite nasty really. Please do it at home.

   Also, people who hum or sing along to songs they are listening to. Tapping on the table is also a no-no.

   How about talking really loudly on the phone, so the entire office can hear.

   Can you tell I work in an office?? LOL

   posted by Lamb on 3-12-2009 at 3:51 pm

6. I can’t stand loud phone talkers (especially when they make tons of personal calls), or people who clod around the office. Pick up your goddamn feet when you walk! I sit right across from someone like that. shoot me.

   posted by s on 3-12-2009 at 3:52 pm

7. Speakerphone should not be used unless you have an office with a door that closes. Person A calls Person B, who sits like 2 cubes away from Person A, on speakerphone. Person B predictably answers via speakerphone. B/c they are spearphone, Persons A & B are yelling into the phone. Person C (me) sits between Persons A & B and gets to hear the whole thing in 4-part harmony.

   posted by Emily on 3-12-2009 at 3:59 pm

8. I was going to comment about clipping of fingernails when I saw Reed not only beat me to it, topped me with the toenails. Toenails?! Really? C’mon!

   posted by mudface on 3-12-2009 at 4:00 pm

9. my desk mate moonlights as a dj on the weekends- house, techno, and eurohouse.

   That means lots and lots of pen drumming, as well as near constant *thump* *thump* *thumping* from his ear buds on fridays while he prepares his set list.

   posted by C on 3-12-2009 at 4:01 pm

10. I have a guy here that thinks it’s his second job to bathe himself in Old Spice every day. ::blech::

    posted by tambalina on 3-12-2009 at 4:03 pm

11. I’ve got one…. a coworker that has to tell you in detail every thought they had to come up with a decision….and not about work! I now know my coworker’s entire paint scheme in her house, why she chose patterned curtains, how her cat was named! To make matters worse she then complains of having to much work and gets to come in on the weekends and collects comp time!

    posted by Frankie on 3-12-2009 at 4:07 pm

12. I work in a bank branch with minimal staff so when a particular employee comes to work the minute she is scheduled and then takes an extra half hour to fourty minutes to “do my makeup, brush my teeth, grab a spoon (for her morning yogurt), and tinkle.” All this at work and before she even pulls up her computer programs and opens her station. Frustrating.

    posted by Katie on 3-12-2009 at 4:07 pm

13. Nail clipping is the worst! The absolute worst! Followed closely by gum-cracking.

    Interesting how most of the peeves relate to the sense of hearing or smell. Perhaps because they are the two senses hardest to “turn off.”

    posted by Rachel on 3-12-2009 at 4:12 pm

14. I used to have a cube-neighbor who would make the phlegm noise every 5 minutes (no joke!). He also used to clip his nails at the office. Luckily, they moved him elsewhere.

    posted by anon. on 3-12-2009 at 4:13 pm

15. I don’t mind speakerphone conversations, but I hate it when my coworkers dial the phone while it’s on speakerphone, especially when they pause and you just hear the dialtone. It’s loud and sets my teeth on edge.

    I used to share an office with a woman who would have loud arguments with her husband over the phone. I really think she forget I was just a few feet away. A couple of times I almost called out, “Would you like me to leave the room and give you two some privacy?”

    posted by Jenn on 3-12-2009 at 4:17 pm

16. Shooting rubber bands at co-workers. I hate that so much, especially when it’s unexpected and hits you in the head. I seriously want to throw my stapler back at them.

    Ha..my Captcha is “stabbings”!

    posted by BB on 3-12-2009 at 4:23 pm

17. I haven’t worked in an office for a long time but #9 seems rather insignificant, I don’t think I’ve ever had that problem because I always check the sink in the bathroom when approaching to wash my hands. Not to prevent any water getting on me but a habit from using public restrooms and not wanting to put my purse down in water.

    I can’t really think of any annoying office habits because I haven’t worked in an office for so long that I have forgotten what it’s like, ha.

    I guess I can do people who carry on with too much personal drama at work, especially if they are friends and/or involved with someone else at the company or department. I have done some very short term temp work and it was very refreshing to not have to care or worry about office politics or who was friends, who had issues with who, etc…

    posted by Sarah in CA on 3-12-2009 at 4:25 pm

18. Loud typers.

    posted by Alicia on 3-12-2009 at 4:25 pm

19. The cell phone ringtone. For me, it’s a guy who has “I’m Alright” by Kenny Loggins as his ringer. Even if he answers right away, it’s too late; the song remains stuck in my head all day. Not a good thing, especially when it gets to that funky part.

    posted by Johnny Cat on 3-12-2009 at 4:30 pm

20. People who spit their chewing tobacco in your trash can.

    EWWWWWW.

    And I thought toe nail clipping at my last company was the worse thing I’d seen.

    posted by wxchick on 3-12-2009 at 4:31 pm

21. I can speak to #9… I do that all of the time. Lean up against a wet counter, I mean, and then it looks like I’ve wet my pants for a while. You think I would learn to check, but no… I never do.

    posted by stacy on 3-12-2009 at 4:33 pm

22. We got a new guy a few months ago who has a severe throat clearing problem. In the mornings, about every thirty seconds. Loud and phlegmmy. He also eats like a government mule, so there’s a constant crunching coming from his cubicle. Crunch-crunch-crunch, hack-hack-hack. Then lunch, then more of the same.

    posted by Smathers on 3-12-2009 at 4:37 pm

23. I work in a call center and I would take any of these issues from my co-workers over people calling in and eating in my ear….I cannot discribe to you how fingernails on chalkboard that is to me when someone is smaking and talking in your ear…..Please for the love of all do not eat when you call your customer service rep….We all beg you….

    posted by Jennifer on 3-12-2009 at 4:37 pm

24. Or the co-worker who spends all his time on the phone talking to people ‘helping them out’. Does work only when it would be glaringly obvious that everyone is working but him. Or has visitors following him around bending his ear about things. And leaves early. Passes on the difficult problems to me because I’m the ‘expert’ on whatever issue. And then when he has health issues, goes into detail about his bowel habits! Old enough and has money enough to retire, but thinks the place would fall down without him. Prejudiced, ignorant, racist, and sexist.

    posted by Vickey on 3-12-2009 at 4:39 pm

25. At my old job (and this is not related to why I left) I kept putting in 20oz sodas in the common area refrigerator to keep them cold for my lunch. People (or one person) kept stealing them, so to keep them from doing so, I’d pour ketchup on the cap to make it look gross. After a ketchup’d soda was taken, I put black ink on dark portions of the label and plastic. I found out who it was after that, as black ink cannot be easily washed off, and they were reprimanded by my upper management. That person was eventually fired, in combination with poor performance reviews. BAM!

    posted by Joel on 3-12-2009 at 4:42 pm

26. I laughed out loud because almost every single one of those happens in my office. I also have a Red Swingline Stapler, so I am sensitive to #6. Here’s the one that annoys me the most – people who you start a SHORT conversation with who end up talking and talking and talking nonstop and you can’t get away or go back to work because they won’t shut up!

    posted by Jeremy on 3-12-2009 at 4:43 pm

27. #5 is a GIGANTIC pet peeve of mine. I don’t care if you want to give yourself cancer with microwave popcorn at home, but at work, that’s like lighting up a cigarette in the breakroom and expecting everyone to be cool with it. Oh and fish. Fish is NOT a ‘work food’. Such a party foul.

    posted by CBD on 3-12-2009 at 4:54 pm

28. Oh my God, Vicky! You just described my coworker perfectly. I thought it might be the same person but mine’s a *um* lady.

    posted by toni on 3-12-2009 at 5:05 pm

29. Smokers cough. Gross and disgusting. And please…don’t blame it on the “dry air”. We all know it’s the cancer sticks you’re lighting up. Uggg

    posted by Angela on 3-12-2009 at 5:10 pm

30. The lady I sit next to hacks up luggies and spits them into her trash can! All day, everyday. Someone else has to empty said trash can at night. Disgusting! I understand you have allergies but please, GO TO THE DOCTOR!

    posted by Holly on 3-12-2009 at 5:23 pm

31. I had a coworker who would talk loudly about how she got waxed… in detail… because her husband liked her to look like a twelve year old gir. :::nods:::

    And not just once. She’d call everyone she knew and have the same conversation. Loudly.

    posted by reece on 3-12-2009 at 5:34 pm

32. Oh, god! I used to work next to a guy who would eat dinner at his desk every night, and it was always some foul-smelling thing, vinegar or cabbage or I don’t even know, just strong and awful. I’ve also sat near two people who would clip their nails at their desk, which I found disgusting.

    posted by M on 3-12-2009 at 5:36 pm

33. Gum cracking and unnecessary mouth related noises drive me to the brink of homicidal rage. I have a coworker who makes a clicking noise with her mouth while she’s “thinking” or reading something. It’s like having a woodpecker in the next cubicle. Of course, the fact that she’s a complete ninny doesn’t really help the annoyance level. She’s guilty of a few other things on the list too. Quite a joy to have in the office. *gag*

    posted by Lisa H on 3-12-2009 at 5:48 pm

34. Coworkers who bring their kids who are too sick for school into the office…and then expect you to babysit, hug them, play with them, and otherwise keep them occupied. NO! BAD! If they’re too sick for school, they’re too sick for the office!

    posted by JenPo on 3-12-2009 at 6:19 pm

35. Whistling.
    Constant cel phone talking
    Loud music
    Smelly food
    Swearing

    clipping nails never really bothered me.

    posted by Scotty A on 3-12-2009 at 6:19 pm

36. #4 doesn’t bother me, but thankfully my coworkers have normal ringtones!

    We are very guilty of #2 in my office. Usually it’s only short convos, or convos that are continued at that person’s desk. We all do it though so I don’t know if it bothers anyone.

    posted by Kate on 3-12-2009 at 6:22 pm

37. We have a lady in our office who likes to put her false teeth in a cup of water and parade them around for everyone to see.

    posted by Paul79 on 3-12-2009 at 6:29 pm

38. how has no one already mentioned annoying e-mail forwards? it is not going to bring you good luck if you forward the message to 10 friends within 10 minutes! don’t you have actual work to do instead of filling out surveys? (i say as i read and comment on mentalfloss at my desk…)

    posted by tiffany on 3-12-2009 at 6:33 pm

39. We have a lady in our office who has the odd habit of putting her false teeth in cup of water and parading them around.

    posted by Paul79 on 3-12-2009 at 6:35 pm

40. How about management people who come to your desk or work space and adjust your monitor or chair for the ten seconds they are there!

    posted by Pamela on 3-12-2009 at 8:08 pm

41. I absolutely hate it when one of my co-workers comes up to my desk to talk with a handful of m&m’s and constantly switches them from one palm of her hand to another!

    posted by Karen on 3-12-2009 at 8:09 pm

42. Coworkers annoy me when they ask me questions.

    :(

    posted by melisser on 3-12-2009 at 9:01 pm

43. I work around salespeople, so I’m used to hearing a lot of phone calls and I’m okay with that. BUT I hate hearing both ends of the conversation! Like when one person calls someone 2 cubicles away. I’d rather them shout or get up and WALK the 3 feet and have an actual conversation.

    posted by catherine ann on 3-12-2009 at 10:13 pm

44. oh, what makes my blood boil isn’t so much what my coworkers do, but my clients. i’m a therapist, and when i have clients who ANSWER their cell phones during session and sit there and talk… i seriously want to hit them!! SERIOUSLY??? you’re going to ANSWER THAT??? ugh- such a waste of my time and the government’s money!

    my next favorite- when the client’s phone rings and they act like it’s not ringing and just sit there and continue to talk over it without silencing the phone… then the person just keeps calling back, and i’m so irate i don’t hear a word you’re saying. of course, it’s always got to be the most annoying ringtone ever- “let me out! i’m stuck in your pocket!” seems to be a popular one, and probably my all time least favorite. and i love when they act like i’m crazy for saying “would you mind to turn your phone off?”

    whatever. let’s just all use a little common sense. or courtesy maybe?

    posted by audrey on 3-13-2009 at 12:01 am

45. I have two guys in my office who clean their ears with Q-Tips, then compare the used Q-Tips together. EWWW!!!

    posted by Arcadia on 3-13-2009 at 1:15 am

46. I once had a boss with whom I shared a small office. She claimed that she had stepped on a piece of glass years ago which had become embedded in her foot, and now “traveled around” inside her foot, apparently wreaking endless nerve and muscle damage. It caused her pain, but she was frightened of surgery, so EVERY TIME she took a step on the foot, she would whisper “Ow.” To the copier: “Ow, ow, ow, ow.” To the water fountain: “Ow ow ow ow ow ow.” To my desk: “Ow ow ow.” When I suggested she seek medical attention, she snapped, “You’re not a doctor.” Yes, you need a medical degree to declare that glass rampaging about inside a foot is a bad idea.

    posted by Emily on 3-13-2009 at 1:44 am

47. Well I always fear incredibly petty and ridiculous for being irritated by this but it just gets on every last nerve of mine:
    In our restroom there is an automated paper towel dispenser which sometimes does not automatically dispense towels like it is supposed to. It is very easy to fix, you just stick your finger in and push this little bar and more shoots out. However, several people can’t seem to grasp this concept so they will go hunt down anything and everything to wipe their hands with (napkins, the huge replacement rolls of paper towels under the sink) and leave it on the counter. For some reason that just pisses me off every day! I think maybe it’s the assumption that it must just be completely broken and there’s no possible way we could fix it. For whatever reason, I find it the most annoying thing in our office.

    posted by Nikki on 3-13-2009 at 2:32 am

48. There is this one girl who works here who feels the need to ask at least 15 questions in 60 seconds, without letting you answer one. She starts a new question after you start to answer. Not only that, but she speaks SO loud, and then has the nerve to comment on how annoying other people are.

    posted by Lil T on 3-13-2009 at 8:19 am

49. Oh my goodness… does anyone else have a co-worker who is clearly COMPLETELY USELESS? Less useful that a post-it who’s sticky side it covered in pant-fuzz. This person on my mind is a 55 year old kindergarden teacher who is seriously having a mid-life crisis. She actually HIDES my materials to make me look bad (yes, its been proven) and throws her weight around like her mental-penis is bigger than everyone else’s. Sometimes I just want to videotape her at school so the parents and the coordinator can see just how little she is worth. I wonder how her husband copes…

    posted by Kate on 3-13-2009 at 8:33 am

50. I have to comment on the sign: “Popcorn USERS”. Do you use popcorn? I don’t think I’ve ever USED popcorn. Consume it, yeah, I’ve done that.

    posted by KJ on 3-13-2009 at 8:43 am

51. Both of my bosses have the habit of yelling across the office: “What time is it?” or “How do you spell____?” even though they are both sitting at their computers with clocks built in and access to dictionary.com. They are also married and get into very heated arguments in front of everyone. It’s extremely awkward.

    posted by MLE on 3-13-2009 at 10:30 am

52. 1. My boss occasionally spends the entire morning whistling the same damn song over and over, so I end up having “Put on a happy face” stuck in my head the rest of the day.

    2. When I first started here, I brought in a radio for when there was no one else in the office. My boss comes up to me and says “We don’t mind if you have a radio, just play it very softly.” Of course, then my other coworker frequently plays classical music on her computer loud enough for all of us on the first floor to hear, and then leaves for lunch, with it still on.

    3. At a previous job, there was a coworker who was completely clueless. I’d be in the next cubicle over, and he’d call me to ask how to spell a word. Of course, since the rest of the office could hear, two other coworkers ended up having their own conversation about how to spell the word (sans phone) from their own cubicles.

    posted by Nom De Plume on 3-13-2009 at 10:30 am

53. I worked next to a total jerk who would call to make his doctor appointments and then brag to the doctor’s office that he was a “NCAA Athlete and member of MENSA” every time. Needless to say, he was neither. They hired this guy to do help out in IT (because he was a Army Vet) and he didn’t even know the difference between a wireless mouse and one that was wired.

    posted by kat621 on 3-13-2009 at 12:00 pm

54. Working in a newsroom all day, the yelling across the room and the talking is part of what we do. And cellphones ringing is also commonplace. No big deal.

    My peeve is when I’m in the restroom and someone in the stall next to me is having a phone conversation! Be it business or personal, can’t it wait a few minutes? I’m afraid to pee for fear the person on the other end will hear…

    posted by Tracie on 3-13-2009 at 12:12 pm

55. I dont have a sense of smell either!!!

    posted by Gina on 3-13-2009 at 12:15 pm

56. Two things:

    1. The guy next to me who chews ice ALL DAY. The worst part is when you know it’s coming, because you can hear the ice slide down the cup and him slurping it in his mouth. Then the next ten excruciating seconds are spent listening to the loudest chewing ever!
    2. My boss stirring the sugar in his coffee with a metal spoon. I don’t know why, but the constant “clang, clang, clang” drives me nuts! Especially on the days when we have a deadline and he drinks about ten cups. He’ll even do it while he’s standing there talking to you.

    posted by Bryon on 3-13-2009 at 12:40 pm

57. I have co-workers that think because their office door locks from the inside it is okay to have sex in their becasue no one will walk in. But we all have to hear it. Needless to say they are on vacation this week so no need for ear plugs.

    posted by Brittany on 3-13-2009 at 12:44 pm

58. I’m surprised that I’m the only one who has coworkers who don’t wash their hands after using the restroom. I think that is the A-1 yuckiest thing, ever. We have several offenders. Some of them just use the hand sanitizer spray, but I really think that only half counts.

    Also, please tell me why it’s necessary to talk on the cell phone in the bathroom? I just can’t imagine a conversation that’s so riviting that neither it nor peeing can wait 3 minutes.

    posted by Kendyl on 3-13-2009 at 1:05 pm

59. Nail clipping is the WORST.

    The woman in the cubicle behind me has a tendency to tap her nails on her desk. I’m sorry, WHY do I have to be distracted from my work because you’re bored?

    posted by Todd on 3-13-2009 at 1:11 pm

60. Brittany-that’s incredibly disturbing. Does upper management know??

    My boss takes FOREVER to return things, which is great because then clients think I’m the one not getting back to them within a reasonable amount of time. “I’m sorry-I’ll get this to you as soon as I can” loses its meaning after a while.

    posted by Kate on 3-13-2009 at 1:15 pm

61. @ Byron
    Maybe you should suggest gently that he get tested for anemia? I’m sure there are medications for it.

    posted by Sara on 3-13-2009 at 1:15 pm

62. Here’s one for the ladies out there:

    You know that fruity lotion you lather all over your hands every hour that you think smells wonderful? It doesn’t smell wonderful. It gives me a headache. If your hands are dry, get some unscented lotion.

    Also, I like to get to know my co-workers personally…to an extent. What I do not need is a 30 min conversation every monday about what you and your family did over the weekend. Your “adventures aren’t that interesting”.

    posted by BW on 3-13-2009 at 1:32 pm

63. The co-worker in the cube across from me keeps a big jar of pretzel sticks on his desk. They are for “everyone”, which means there is a steady stream of scavengers going in and out of his cube, eating free pretzels and chit chatting. When he lets the jar go empty, the scavengers start looting our cubes for a “fix”. Put it in the break room if it’s for everyone.

    He’s also a printer pest. He prints a 40 page document that is essentially all black text to the color printer because the company logo on it is blue, and then he never picks it up. If he finds something funny/interesting online, he PRINTS a copy for each person he wants to share it with (LINK?? EMAIL??) which he then has to hand-deliver and remind them that he has pretzels at his desk and they are for everyone.

    posted by Maria on 3-13-2009 at 1:46 pm

64. I have a coworker who comes over to my desk several times a day to moan incredulously, “It’s only ___ o’clock?!”

    Yes, I have a clock on my computer as well. I’m well aware what time it is, thank you. ALSO, unlike you, I have plenty of work that still needs to be done before quitting time, and your complaints about how slow the day is moving are just going to make me have to stay later.

    Thanks.

    posted by CT on 3-13-2009 at 1:58 pm

65. Does anyone else have the WOW nerds that talk about their raids and guilds and armour and all that other stuff I don’t understand? I don’t mind it where I work now, but at the last job it was horrible. They would talk all night about it instead of working, even going as far as to play it in the office while everyone else picks up the slack.

    That, and people who ask you tons of questions when there are those who have been appointed to a position to answer the questions.

    posted by D Hue on 3-13-2009 at 2:01 pm

66. One day I went to the restroom to do my business and someone was on the phone in the stall next to me apparently talking about a car they were going to buy…”does it have a sunroof?” was repeated no less than 5 times…I was really annoyed and wished for a huge fart to alert the person they were talking to that they were in the restroom and lets just say my wish was granted…then the flushing of the toilet and drying of the hands w/ an air dryer for a very long time made me feel better :p

    I too work w/ a phelgm master which makes me want to vomit every time I hear it.

    I will clip my nails at work if they break.

    People w/ coffee breath who stand too damn close annoy me.

    posted by Julia on 3-13-2009 at 2:33 pm

67. While employed at an unnamed online university (read: Hell on Earth), a former co-worker prayed incredibly loudly – I’m talking fire and brimstone loud – over his computer while talking with his students. As he was in enrollment, this could mean anywhere from 20-50 students in a day. After a while, the “prayer” loses all meaning and becomes a cheap sales tactic.

    Also didn’t help that, after politely being asked to keep his voice down for the benefit of those of us sitting and working within earshot, we were all pronounced Godless heathens, and then had to listen to “Jesus, help them find you! I ask you, LAAAWWD, open their hearts!” multiple times daily. Sanctimonious windbag.

    (It’s not hard to understand why I would cry in the parking lot each morning, before forcing myself to walk in the building.)

    posted by Megan on 3-13-2009 at 2:55 pm

68. One woman in the office constantly blows her nose at her desk. It isn’t a little discreet blowing of her nose either; it’s honking loug and absolutely disgusting. She does this about 10 times a day and about 5 blows each time. She’s so gross

    posted by DanBern on 3-13-2009 at 3:14 pm

69. I can’t believe that I am the only one who has a co-worker who treats me to a daily symphony of his bodily sounds and, oh yes, the accompanying odors.

    posted by JT on 3-13-2009 at 3:23 pm

70. *Clipping nails
    *Playing loud music – sometimes playing percussion on the desk or singing along
    *Strong perfume/cologne
    *Not closing refrigerator door in break room
    *Sneak up behind people who work with their back to the door and loudly shout “boo”
    *Bringing their illnesses to work, spreading them around, then staying home sick the rest of the week. We’ve had the flu and pinkeye this past week.
    *Leaving dirty dishes or food pieces in the break room sink

    posted by PS on 3-13-2009 at 3:44 pm

71. You all have just about covered the whole list! :-) I’ve a few more …

    – The guys over the cubicle wall who crack their knuckles several times a day. The sound of it just makes my stomach turn over. Urp.

    – The blonde ditz upstairs with the cinderella voice who just prattles on and on and on about all her personal decisions.

    – Those co-workers who feel the need to discuss the specifics of certain medical procedures. Everything from surgery down to giving blood. It makes me flat out woozy just hearing the play by play

    posted by MsMoMo on 3-13-2009 at 5:23 pm

72. Oh sweet lord, how could I have forgotten the phantom chair adjusters! I come into my office at 1:30pm everyday and work until 10pm. Despite the fact that there are vacant cubicles, some mysterious force causes people (especially regional management) to use my chair and desk for their purposes in the mornings. Why in the world is it necessary for someone to adjust the seat height, back height, arm rest height, and recline lock on a chair in order to sit there for a very short time? Is your spine so delicate that you can’t just leave my friggen chair the way I had it so that I don’t have to spend the first few minutes of my work day getting my chair back the way I had it? Am I the only person who was taught to put things back the way you found them if you are using someone else’s stuff? And when I ask who used my chair, no one ever seems to know. It’s amazing! Apparently my cubicle is haunted by the invisible spirit of a 7 ft tall person with abnormally tiny arms and a deep rooted desire to dump my ass on the floor when I lean back. Gahh! Hulk smash!

    posted by Lisa H on 3-13-2009 at 6:19 pm

73. I hate it when people say, “are we having fun yet?” It’s not so much the phrase itself that bothers me–it’s the repeated use of it. Is that really all you can think of to say to me?

    posted by Emily on 3-13-2009 at 9:39 pm

74. We have a shared computer (blue collar job) in the control room. One guy likes to sit there and look up hookers on craigslist. While he is doing it he shoots off random text messages.

    posted by cherrypicker on 3-13-2009 at 11:28 pm

75. Definitely eating smelly food – I work with a guy who eats a can of tuna at his desk most days. Drains the can into a cup and leaves it on his desk and you can enjoy the smell rest of the day.

    People who don’t clean up after themselves – whether using the microwave, breakroom, rest room or meeting room.

    Incompetent people are the worst though and I work with a lot of them. I’d gladly work with all the smelly or messy people if they all just did their jobs!! They don’t know they own job and expect you to help them so you can’t get your own work done….

    posted by lisa on 3-14-2009 at 12:35 am

76. Once I worked in a small office (enclosed room) with a couple desks. The other person that I worked with was the loudest, grossest eater ever. I think he chewed with his mouth open. He sounded like a dog.

    Once I worked with a woman who can best be described as Ann Coulter’s protege. Plus she had the craziest stories–I think she was a pathological liar.

    A few from my husband…

    There is a very elderly gentleman who works at his office who apparently has no control of his bowels anymore. I mean, crap EVERYWHERE. And the poor secretary has to clean it up. :( He only works there because the owner is a friend…

    …on that same note, probably about half of the office workers there are older men who are good personal friends with the owner. Which means they do a half-arsed job and don’t have to worry. Or don’t do their jobs at ALL and don’t have to worry, because the general manager can’t or won’t do squat about it.

    Another of his peaves is when one of his co-workers consistently leaves work early and comes in later and never puts in overtime, even when it’s super busy.

    posted by anon on 3-14-2009 at 1:34 am

77. No one wants to hear noises you make with your mouth. Especially not at work. This includes gum smacking, cracking, chewing. It amazes me that people don’t understand that others don’t care for their eating noises..

    posted by ashleyrobin on 3-14-2009 at 2:24 am

78. PPen clicking. Every second of every work day.

    posted by Daniel Tan on 3-14-2009 at 4:00 am

79. I worked with this woman who had to put her hands on you every time she thought something was insanely hilarious (even if it was a story she was telling). Keep your hands away from me! She was also working away from her husband, so she would get close to and/or follow around any male who was on shift with her (even if they were married). She was sitting so close to one of my co-workers one day that I thought she was sitting dead center in front of the computer even though he was (but he was too nice of a guy to tell her to back off). She was leaning across him from his left hand side to use the mouse on his right hand side. Additionally, any time any guy walked by (even our sick or injured patients) she would also grab on to me and mention how attractive he was and ask my opinion. Most of the time I would pretend not to notice the guy, just to frustrate her. She also thought every man on Earth was flirting with her even though she looked like a female version of Howdy Doody (burn!)…

    posted by Brandy on 3-14-2009 at 3:45 pm

80. I work with two exceedingly annoying men.

    1. Likes to lean back in his desk chair with his feet on the desk YELLING into the speakerphone with the door open about his homeowner’s association and someone’s landscaping/paint/fence/etc. all day. He bought a new toaster for the office kitchen and burns his toast EVERY day. He brags that he pays his wife to sleep in the same bedroom with his toddler and he has never changed a diaper.

    2. Is nice, if useless and prohibits others from working. Corners people and talks to them for at least 15 minutes. Warms up the same cup of coffee at least 3 times an hour because the office kitchen is on the far end of the office from his. He lines up food on his desk and usually has 12 different containers. Nearly everything he eats has vinegar in it. He is very thin, but is back and forth to the microwave with food at least once an hour. Oh, and nothing he eats is refrigerated. Just sits on his desk all day.

    The boss of the two above clips his fingernails every morning, I can hear him 100 feet away. But I am gainfully employed, and have a door to shut when they reach critical mass and near my breaking point.

    posted by gckittehmom on 6-5-2009 at 10:30 pm

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