The genius world was stunned today by allegations that noted poet Emily Dickinson has been using performance enhancing drugs in her quest to win mental_floss‘s 2009 “Tournament of Genius.” Through her publicist, Dickinson made the following statement today: “The murmur of a bee/A witchcraft yielded me./If any ask me why,/’Twere easier to die/Than tell.”
Nobody has any idea what that means, but Dickinson has been replaced by ultraconservative commentator Stephen Colbert, whose original omission inspired hundreds of angry emails from his supporters. (OK, two emails, and a comment from someone named Tommy7ft.) Colbert will battle J.K. Rowling today in a first-round matchup of best-selling authors.
Hope this doesn’t mess up anybody’s office pool.
[See the whole bracket here.]
Comments (11)
Comment
- subscribe /
- give a gift /
- terms of service /
- about /
- contact us /
- write for us /
- ad info /
- subscriber services /
- press /
- privacy policy /
- rss /
© 2012 Mental Floss Inc. All Rights Reserved. Mental Floss is a registered trademark owned by Felix Dennis. mentalfloss.com is a trademark owned by Felix Dennis.
Disclaimer: All submissions made to mental_floss become the property of Mental Floss Inc and may be used without further permission by the submitter and without compensation to the submitter. If you do not agree to these terms, please do not submit anything to mental_floss.
You guys are too funny, haah. Good move though because I love Stephen Colbert.
posted by Sarah in CA on 3-18-2009 at 11:37 am
You’ve put two of my favorite people against each other! How can I choose between the creator of Harry Potter and the wittiest person on TV? Oh what a pickle I’m in.
posted by Tricia on 3-18-2009 at 11:59 am
I say nay. I was actually really looking forward to pitting Emily Dickinson against J.K. Rowling. And I have to say, removing one of the few women contenders from the race (and a woman considered a great mind in an age when it wasn’t common practice for women to do much more than sew and make babies) just rubs me the wrong way entirely.
Mental_floss FAIL.
posted by Chelsea on 3-18-2009 at 12:18 pm
sense of humor FAIL, chelsea.
posted by b on 3-18-2009 at 1:18 pm
I too am a little disappointed. I was looking forward to seeing how the two female writers did against each other. I hope something more went into the decision to pull Dickinson than two emails from Colbert fans (not that I have anything against him). Also, it messed up my bracket.
posted by Kelsey on 3-18-2009 at 3:20 pm
that so wasn’t Emily dickenson. the meter was all wrong. I call shenanigans. Is she pulling a Dave Chapelle? publicist is obviously covering something up.
Everyone knows you can set all her poems the tune of “The Yellow Rose of Texas”
posted by lewen on 3-18-2009 at 3:27 pm
Yeah, Emily Dickinson fans have the potential to get Mental Floss free press on a nationally popular tv show. The true geniuses are the ones who ensure Colbert talks about this contest on his show.
posted by ian on 3-18-2009 at 3:29 pm
HAH! I love the Breaking News update about this on the front page, you guys kill me!
posted by Sarah in CA on 3-18-2009 at 5:51 pm
So where is Rachel Maddow then?
posted by Jix on 3-18-2009 at 6:36 pm
Oh, that’s just evil. Truthiness versus Gryffindor? It’s an impossible choice.
posted by M on 3-18-2009 at 7:19 pm
Dickinson has NOTHING on Colbert. She wasn’t even famous until after she died. You can’t be considered a genius if you don’t KNOW you’re one. Right? Colbert has been a comedic genius since his days on The Daily Show. Good move, Mentalfloss. Let me sum up E.D’s poems for you, incase you missed it. “Life sucks.” She’s sort of like the Lewis Black of liturature.
posted by tommy on 3-22-2009 at 11:40 pm