It’s not necessarily Britain’s weirdest festival or display of specious talents – after all, there’s the annual Bog Snorkeling Championships in the little town of Llanwrtyd Wells, Wales, where competitors, preferably clad in amusing costumes, are forced to traverse a length of peat bog with the caveat that they are not allowed to swim or walk; the annual Cooper’s Hill Cheese-Rolling and Wake, a 200-year-old Gloucester tradition in which brave contestants hurl themselves down a steep hill after a 8-pound round of cheese; and the World Gurning Championships, which features contestants from around the world donning a horse collar and making faces.

The World Toe Wrestling Championships just happen to be the most recent. On Saturday, June 13, competitors with names like The Toeminator, The Itatoelion Stallion, and Nasty took part in the annual championship, pitting the world’s best toe wrestlers against one another in a contest podophobics tremble at the mere mention of. Dirty feet and tricks are looked down on, but the rules couldn’t be simpler: At the cry of “Toes away!” the competitors lock toes and use brute force, ankle-power, and dexterity to force one another off the “toedium.”

The His-toe-ry

The annual tradition started, just like many, many time-honored British traditions, in a pub. In the mid-1970s, a group of hikers, or walkers as they’re called over here, stopping at the Ye Olde Royal Oak Inn in the Staffordshire Peak District, wanted to invent a sport that the British could win. Unfortunately, the inaugural World Toe Wrestling Championship was won by a visiting Canadian, so the idea was put on a back burner until the 1990s.

Since then, the World Toe Wrestling Championships have been held with admirable regularity, although the same folks keep winning: Paul “Toeminator” Beech, whose wife, Mrs. Toeminator, has also won several of the ladies competitions, and Alan “Nasty” Nash seem to be dominating the sport. Attempts to get toe wrestling admitted to the Olympics have failed, however, with London hosting the 2012 games, who knows?

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