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Sometimes I forget what a crafty genius I am in the morning. Last night I made the mistake of trying to outwit my morning self by setting my alarm for the ungodly hour of 6, and placing it on my desk on the other side of the room. That way, I figured if I hit the snooze button multiple times, which I’m ashamed that I’m prone to do, I’d at least get a workout doing laps until I woke up (I’m also ashamed that that’s what my workouts consist of). I did NOT, however end up doing those laps. Instead, when I actually woke up, I looked at my clock and realized that at 6 I had rationalized to myself that I needed an extra 3.5 or so hours of beauty sleep and reprogrammed the alarm to go off at 9:30!
Anyway, to make a long story longer, I did a little research this morning, and found a link to the scariest alarm clocks ever made. These are definitely the things (my) nightmares are made of. From hand-grenade alarm clocks that your so-called “friends” can throw into your room to wake you up (the piercing ringing only stops when you find your friend and have them replace the pin), to electronic monstrosities that you have chase around your room and tackle just to hit snooze , to a chicken alarm clock that keeps dropping eggs all over your floor and clucking up a storm until you replace ‘em, I think this is exactly the sort of technology the Unibomber was warning us about! Check them out here at your own risk.
I’m not a mathematician, but: If your alarm went off at 9:30, and you posted this at 9:55 — I’m pretty sure you’re not wearing pants yet.
But about alarm clocks: You should check out SleepSmart, an alarm clock designed by Brown students that measures your sleep cycle and then wakes you at the moment your sleep is lightest. It’s awesome. And yes, you have to sleep wearing a headband attached to a computer.
(I’d post a link to NewScientist, but that is apparently not possible in comments.)
posted by John on 3-31-2006 at 7:02 am
hmm, my previous comment seems not to have gone through.
But you should check out the amazing SleepSmart!
http://www.newscientisttech.com/article/mg18624956.600.html
posted by John on 3-31-2006 at 7:08 am
I’ve been dying to get hold of the one that rolls off your bedside table and plays hide-and-seek until you find the lousy thing and turn it off. I really do think this might be the only alarm clock in the world that could drag me out of bed. But I wonder why they called it “Clocky” instead of the obvious appropriate name: “Hell on Wheels.”
posted by Mary on 3-31-2006 at 8:46 am
Did you guys see the alarm clock that didn’t make it through to the next round on American Inventer last night? Holy Ding-a-lings!
posted by David on 3-31-2006 at 4:20 pm
Hey! YOu can’t fix typos in comments! I meant Inventor, duh.
posted by David on 3-31-2006 at 4:21 pm