Gawker is running a poll to determine Time’s Person of the Year. We thought we ought to step up and offer some of our own nominees:

ABBA: for tenacity in the face of adversity.

Zhang Zhihe (not to be confused with Zhang Ziyi): for saving the world, one panda at a time.

Harold and Kumar: for finally, inspiringly, completing their heroic quest.

Carl Smith and Dave Jones: for proving that indeed, there’s always a bigger fish.

The inventor of Cabbage Patch Snacktime Kids: for demonstrating that one shouldn’t put one’s fingers in one’s mouth. Or any mouth, for that matter.

Matt, our reader: who claims to have charged 17 cents at Kinko’s. We’re pretty much always annoyed with Kinko’s; we really think he deserves this award more than anyone else.

The inventor of the only alarm clock that’s ever worked for us.

King George III. (We said “Person of the Year;” we didn’t say which year.)

These guys.