mental_floss magazine
SUBSCRIBE >
GIFT SUBSCRIPTIONS >
DIGITAL SUBSCRIPTIONS >
subscriber services >
Long before I ever knew what a mondegreen was, I used to think the lyrics of David Bowie’s “Suffragette City” went like this:
Hey man, oh leave me alone, you know
Hey man, oh Henry, get off the phone, I gotta
Hey man, I gotta straighten my face
This malaprop chick’s just put my spine out of place
Of course, now I know the original malaprop chick is actually a “mellow-thighed chick,” and my head hangs low in shame. But we all do it, right? We all make up lyrics (even words!) when we don’t know what the artist is actually singing.
A misheard, or made-up lyric, is called a mondegreen, after Lady Mondegreen.
So who is Lady Mondegreen? Well, she’s a misheard lyric herself from an ancient Scottish ballad called “The Bonny Earl of Murray.” The last two lines of the original lyric go like this:
They have slain the Earl of Murray,
And they layd him on the green.
The American writer, Sylvia Wright, is the one who misheard the lyric when she was a child and wrote about it years later, coining the word mondegreen for this first time in a Harper’s Magazine essay published in 1954.
So okay, “Lady Mondegreen.” Not so funny, but the ballad is over 300 years old. Much funnier, perhaps, is the mondegreen used in the TV show, Friends, when Phoebe mishears the words of a certain Elton John song and sings, “Hold me closer Tony Danza.”
What about you? We’d love to know what some of your favorite misheard lyrics are.
Check out past On Music posts here >>
Comments (149)
Comment
- Follow mental_floss
I used to think they were singing “Looks like a douche” in Blinded by the Light.
posted by JC on 9-3-2009 at 9:59 am
My little brother is the KING of mishearing lyrics. He misheard “Do the Hustle” on a CD Infomercial as “Two Ninety-Four”.
posted by Jonny Hammersticks on 9-3-2009 at 9:59 am
I’ve always know this as a condition called Lyricosis. The victims of Lyricosis aren’t only the ones afflicted by it, but their friends and family as well.
I’ve always been partial to Jimi Hendrix’ “Scuse me, while I kiss this guy!”
posted by Dave on 9-3-2009 at 10:02 am
So long, ma,
So long, pa,
So long, needles and pins
Sweet City Woman
posted by Hyacinth on 9-3-2009 at 10:02 am
I think one of the best times I had on youtube when searching through music is when I ran into a series of Fallout Boy music videos labeled \Fallout Boy misheard lyrics.\ I didn’t realize how popular it was to take a song and mince the lyrics up to make odd words and new meanings. Either way, the hilarity is definitely there.
posted by Steven on 9-3-2009 at 10:06 am
Mr. Mister – Kyrie – I was sure he was saying “carrying a laser down the road I must travel”
posted by Eric on 9-3-2009 at 10:08 am
A friend of mine was completely convinced that the song “Kyrie Eleison” by Mr. Mister was actually
Give me a laser
Down the road that I must travel
Give me a laser
In the darkness of the night
Give me a laser
Where I’m going will you follow
Give me a laser
On a highway in the light
Understandable, since, you know, it’s GREEK, but still. Cracks me up.
posted by Adrienne on 9-3-2009 at 10:15 am
(I’ve Got) The Power-
It’s gettin’, it’s gettin’ it’s gettin’ kinda hectic
My friend Coll thought they were saying-
A skinny, a skinny, a skinny kinda heaven
@JC- but he’s really singing “tied up like a douche..” right? :p
Hey does this word apply when I lyrics to instrumental numbers.. like movie scores? Nothing as clever as Bill Murray’s Star Wars song… I just like to sing the name of the movie repeated until I get bored.
posted by Jess H. on 9-3-2009 at 10:18 am
One of my friends in high school misheard lyrics in TLC’s “No Scrubs”: Instead of “hangin’ out the passenger side of his best friend’s ride”, she thought it was “hangin’ out the passenger side of his best french fry.” I’ve also heard the chorus to Chumbawamba’s “Tubthumper” sung as, “I’ve got no job, but I’m an opera fan.” And when I was a kid, I thought Bon Jovi’s “Living on a Prayer” went, “Take my hand, we’ll make it, I square”; another was in New Kids On The Block’s “Please Don’t Go Girl”, when they sang, “I love you, I guess I always will” and I thought it was “I love you, Vanessa, I always will” (then I got mad, thinking they were singing to some girl named Vanessa instead of me; hey, I was 6 at the time!)
What a great recaptcha: anti-Government zulu
posted by Krie on 9-3-2009 at 10:19 am
my ex brother-in-law:
“man she’s got issues and i’ve gotta pee” ~the offspring
“i am just a worthless lawyer” ~tool
i could go on but i’m at work and need to get back to it…
posted by casual_observer on 9-3-2009 at 10:19 am
My lovely wife is Japanese and speaks English as a second language. For years she was always talking about he Taco Bell song. She’d even sing a bar “…dee dee dee dee da dee da Taco Bell…” And I just couldn’t place it. Then Bonnie Raitt’s “Something to Talk About” came on the car radio one day, and she said “Oh, Taco Bell song.” I laughed so hard I had to pull over.
posted by vegasmojo on 9-3-2009 at 10:20 am
Van Halen, Top of the World.
The line is:
“Oh, I know it wont hurt,
I gotta have a little taste
I just wanna sink my teeth in that
Fine piece of real estate, yeah”
Until I actually looked it up, I thought it was something much more obscene, as in “I want to sink my d___ in that fine piece of real estate.” Which, you have to admit, would work.
posted by Jim on 9-3-2009 at 10:22 am
In The Cult’s “Love Removal Machine” I always thought where he said:
“You little soul shaker”
I always thought he said:
“You little salt shaker”
I was proved wrong :)
posted by Mareeeee on 9-3-2009 at 10:25 am
The Beach Boys’ “Kokomo” will always contain the line, “I want to take that mount of rotten steak” to me.
posted by matthew on 9-3-2009 at 10:26 am
I always wondered if Weird Al has a hearing problem, and that’s how he comes up with his stuff…
I knew someone who as a child thought Steve Miller Band’s Jet Airliner said “pink hotel with the light on”
Not a misheard lyric, but when I was a kid, I thought Ring of Fire was about a guy at a party who got drunk and fell into the fireplace
posted by Wayne on 9-3-2009 at 10:27 am
Every Breath You Take – the Police
“I’m a pool hall ace” instead of “my poor heart aches.”
I still have to actively concentrate to hear the line correctly.
posted by Ben on 9-3-2009 at 10:32 am
I always thought that (I’ve Got) The Power was “The kid’s, the kid’s, the kid’s gotta have it,” so thank you, Jess H!
Up until last week I thought that ABC’s “When Smokey Sings” was “I’ve Got Something to Say.”
posted by Pol on 9-3-2009 at 10:36 am
A friend of mine thought that “A year has gone since I wrote my note” in Sending out an SOS by the Police was “A year has gone since I broke my nose”
posted by Anya on 9-3-2009 at 10:39 am
I always misheard Phil Collins “One More Night” as “One Walnut.”
posted by jesp on 9-3-2009 at 10:40 am
for some reason my older sister thought sheryl crow was singing \until the sun comes up over santa moni-cup-full-of-lard.\ no joke.
posted by jg on 9-3-2009 at 10:40 am
Creedence Clear Water Revival’s Bad Moon on the Rise:
Dont go around tonight/Well, its bound to take your life/ There’s a bathroom on the right.
posted by Geb on 9-3-2009 at 10:42 am
Rolling Stones – “I’ll never be your big suburban” (Beast of Burden)
posted by K on 9-3-2009 at 10:47 am
Dave Matthews Band- “Crash into me” = “Facimille”
posted by Shawn on 9-3-2009 at 10:48 am
Haha … apparently “Blinded By The Light” (the Manfred Mann’s Earth Band’s version, anyway) is a confusing song, because I always hear “wrapped up like a douche.” I swear they’re not saying “deuce.”
I’m sure there are many others I’ve mistaken, but I can’t think of any good examples right now. I find that I often have trouble identifying any lyrics at all if the singer’s enunciation isn’t super clear. It just sounds like a garbled mess of sounds to me until I look up the words. This seems to be more of a problem for me than for other people I know, so I wonder if there’s something weird about the way my brain interprets sung words. Who knows?
posted by Kelsey on 9-3-2009 at 10:49 am
A friend’s sister was SURE Cher’s “Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves” went like this:
“Gypsies, chimpanzees.”
We hear it from the people of the town, they call us “Gypsies, chimpanzees.”
And every night all the men would come around…and lay the monkey down.
We all about wet ourselves when we first heard the story.
posted by Rachel on 9-3-2009 at 10:50 am
For the longest time I thought the chorus in the Manfred Mann’s Earth Band song “Blinded by the Light” went “wrapped up like a douche” instead of “revved up like a deuce”. Apparently, I wasn’t alone.
posted by Steph on 9-3-2009 at 10:52 am
I have two. The Red Hot Chili Peppers song “Under the bridge”
I heard – under the bridge shantall is where i drew sum blood.
actual – under the bridge downtown is where i drew some blood.
and
Jimi Hendrix’s Hey Joe
I heard – angel where you goin with that gun in your hand
actual- hey joe where you goin with that gun in you hand.
posted by JOHNBOY on 9-3-2009 at 10:54 am
The classic 80’s “Rock Me Amedaus” by Falco, I always heard as “come on and rock me, hot potatoes.”
My brother-in-law to this day will argue with me that the line from the Steve Miller “Jet Airliner” is “Big old jet had a light on”
posted by Dana on 9-3-2009 at 10:57 am
I thought for the longest time that Seals and Crofts “Summer Breeze” went:
Summer breeze makes me feel fine/always have a jazz band in my mind. Hey, it makes sense! Why can you have a song in your heart but not a jazz band in your mind?
posted by Amanda on 9-3-2009 at 10:57 am
The Hollies-Bus Stop-Always thought it was “Bus stop where there she’s there i say please share my umbrella”
I still don’t know what he is saying and i still sing it that way.
posted by tee on 9-3-2009 at 11:01 am
My favorite reference for this came from a King of Queens episode.
Doug and Carrie were driving somewhere and Neil Diamond’s “Forever in Blue Jeans” came on the radio. Doug started singing along: “Reverend Bluejeans..”
Carrie let him have it for getting the lyrics wrong, and to this day, whenever I screw up a lyric, my wife says: “What’s up, reverend bluejeans?!” :)
posted by Brucey on 9-3-2009 at 11:02 am
My aunt as a child was convinced it was ‘Lucy in the Sky with Don’
posted by Dayna on 9-3-2009 at 11:06 am
sledgehammer by peter gabriel–i guess he says “been feeding the rhythm”, but sounds like “been peeing in the river” to me…
posted by brittany on 9-3-2009 at 11:07 am
I have always heard one line Van Morrison’s “Brown eyed girl” as:
“Gunnin’ down the old man/with the transistor radio”.
I knew that couldn’t be right, so I finally had to google the actual lyrics: “going down to the old mine/ with a transistor radio”
I still hear it wrong.
posted by tamar on 9-3-2009 at 11:12 am
When I was young, say 5 or so, and I learned the patriotic song “My Country, ‘Tis of Thee” in school. I always thought it went “My country, tisafee”.
To this day, my Mom calls me Tisafee…
posted by Kate on 9-3-2009 at 11:13 am
It was years before I realized Billy Ocean was saying “Caribbean Queen”. I thought it sounded like “Caribou Suite”.
posted by Dudeman on 9-3-2009 at 11:13 am
I always heard the AC/DC song \Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap\ as \Dirty Dees Dun-der Cheese.\ I still sing it that way, just to annoy my husband after he showed me the error of my ways…:)
posted by KittyMarie on 9-3-2009 at 11:14 am
Lasgo – Hold Me Now
Hold me now.
Ohh-hh Hold my fart.
Stay with me.
Let the lovin’ start.
…my husband has ruined this song for me forever.
posted by Elli on 9-3-2009 at 11:24 am
“sounds of silence” by simon and garfunkle.
Lyric – “Hear my wordds that I might teach you”
I hear – “Hear my words I’m an angry Jew??????!!!!!”
actually had to look up lyrics because it sounded so absurd
posted by Chris on 9-3-2009 at 11:28 am
I believe it was Dave Barry who said that he heard the words to “Help Me, Rhonda” as “Wel, since she put me down I’ve got owls puking in my head”
(Well since she put me down Ive been out doin in my head)
posted by Rance on 9-3-2009 at 11:35 am
My mom always thought Prince was saying “cigarette Colette” instead of “little red Corvette”
posted by June on 9-3-2009 at 11:37 am
When I was a kid I must have thought Van Halen’s “Jump” was about a dude at a construction site.
I heard “Maxwell Jump” instead of “Might as well jump.”
And I heard “Can’t you see me standing here, I’ve got my back against the wrecking machine” instead of “Can’t you see me standing here, I’ve got my back against the record machine.”
It never seemed to bother me that the rest of the lyrics had nothing to do with construction. Or a guy named Max.
I was in high school when I finally figured it out.
posted by Renis on 9-3-2009 at 11:39 am
Is there anyone else who realized that Prince was singing about a runaway slave? “Niggarette come back…”
I thought it very odd that they could get away with being so racist, and then I found out he was talking about a “Little Red Corvette”. Very embarrassing!
posted by Katie B on 9-3-2009 at 11:40 am
My poor husband mishears lyrics all the time. My favorite Hubs botched lyric? “Faded love, you’ve got me on my knees, faded love..” Which was actually, “Layla, you’ve got me on my knees, Layla…”–as in Eric Clapton’s “Layla.”
Oh Hubs, God bless ya!
posted by Lori on 9-3-2009 at 11:46 am
Led Zeppelin-Custard Pie
Actual: (mostly unintelligible)
Ooh, ya, drop down, baby, let’s go to sleep, yeah
Drop down, mama, lay down, just dream of me
Well, my mama allow me
I fool around all night long
Mine:
Line 1-? mumbling
Line 2-? screaming/mumbling
Well, my BOLOGNA
I POOH-BEAR all night long.
My kids think it’s hilarious when I sing it that way.
posted by Nick on 9-3-2009 at 11:53 am
I used to wonder as a kid how AC/DC knew about the Dirty Deeds of the Thunder Cheats.
posted by Bert on 9-3-2009 at 11:53 am
In Jethro Tull’s “Aqualung”, the opening lines are “Sitting on a park bench/eyeing little girls with bad intent.” I always heard “Five little girls with bad intent,” and wondered why those nasty little snots were bothering poor old Aqualung.
posted by Jon. on 9-3-2009 at 12:11 pm
she’s got electric boobs . . . her mom has, too . . . ya know i read it in a magazine . . . oh, oh b-b-b-bennie and the jets
posted by Shelly on 9-3-2009 at 12:12 pm
For me it was the Pearl Jam song “Glorified G”. The entire song was about guns, but I couldn’t figure out why he kept saying, “…glorified version of a pelican.” What does this have to do with birds? I was confused for years. The real lyric, “…glorified version of a pellet gun.”
posted by Nick on 9-3-2009 at 12:13 pm
Now I know that the “kiss this guy” mondegreen is the most cliche one of all but it was given a new twist when a bandmate of my son’s expressed relief on being told the correct wording. He had always felt a bit awkward with singing about kissing a guy!
posted by Alice on 9-3-2009 at 12:14 pm
I think the longest I’ve ever laughed was when a friend told me that as a child he misheard Simon and Garfunkel’s “Cecilia” — instead of “you’re shaking my confidence daily” he thought it went “you’re shaking my armpits insanely.”
posted by VM on 9-3-2009 at 12:16 pm
When I was a kid, I thought “Secret Agent Man” was “Secret Asian Man”. I had a whole image in my head of a Japanese James Bond.
posted by Julia on 9-3-2009 at 12:21 pm
My all time favorite was my older brother when he was younger would sing “Saving all my love for Lou” instead of “Saving all my love for you.”
posted by John on 9-3-2009 at 12:27 pm
-Elton John- “Tiny Dancer” is it “Pirate Smile” or “Vibrant Smile” is the “tiny Dancer in my Head” or “…in my hand”
- England Dan and John Ford Coley- “I’d really love to see you tonight” “I’m not talking about the linen…”
-Manfred Man- you mean it isn’t “Wrapped up like a Douche you know the rumor in the night”? Oh my god I’ve made a terrible mistake!
posted by Don on 9-3-2009 at 12:31 pm
I know the actual line is “I never” but at the end of The Killers’ Mr. Brightside it sounds like he is singing Viagra!
And when I do hear Tiny Dancer on the radio or out somewhere, I always sing the hold me Tony Danza! Also there is a book out by the same name that is filled with Mondegreens.
posted by Mavis on 9-3-2009 at 12:32 pm
Which come to think of kinda makes sense — the previous line is “you’re breaking my heart”, maybe that IS what happens when armpits are shaken insanely enough.
posted by VM on 9-3-2009 at 12:33 pm
It’s not exactly the same thing, but years ago, when I was singing in a church choir, we would sing a hymm called “Gladly The Cross I’d Bear.” A friend of mine told me he always thought of the lyrics as “Gladly the cross-eyed bear.” I could never sing that hymn without cracking up after that.
posted by Pat on 9-3-2009 at 12:45 pm
I had a friend who thought the first line of Strong Enough by Sheryl Crow was “Gotta pee like hell tonight”… drove his girlfriend crazy with that.
posted by Mindy on 9-3-2009 at 12:51 pm
Although my husband and friends always catch me singing the wrong lyrics, these are the two that stand out the most…
Stevie Nicks’ “just like the ones we love…” i always thought was wierd “just like the one winged dove…”
In Carol King’s your so vain “wife of a close friend” i have alway sung as “wife of the postman”
posted by Lisa on 9-3-2009 at 12:52 pm
A girl at a wedding requested that the band sing “Slow Motion Walter.” They did finally figure out she wanted to hear “Smoke on the Water.” I subsequently named my cat Slow Motion Walter. Walter for short.
posted by Rufus T. Harlemberry on 9-3-2009 at 12:52 pm
There’s a book by Ed McBain called “Gladly the Cross-Eyed Bear.”
posted by B on 9-3-2009 at 12:55 pm
Oh, I feel so much better. I am with EVERYONE on Blinded By the Light, I had to look that up!!!
There’s one, I can’t remember the title, with the lyric, lyrical gangster and I always thought it was leprechaun dancer\n
My dad always thougth Give me the beat boys, was Give me the Beach Boys (Dobie Grey, Drift Away)
John Mayer, 1983 — Make me a red cape, I wanna be Superman I thought it was, Make me a Bat Cave.\n
Oh, this just made my day.
posted by Jessica S on 9-3-2009 at 12:56 pm
As a child, my sister and I would sing along to “Juan got a medal”…actually “Guantanamera”. It was a hit in the early 60’s. It still cracks us up. We were clueless what is was about, and since we didn’t understand Spanish, it made perfect sense to us the way we sang it!
posted by Annette on 9-3-2009 at 12:58 pm
Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam told the story about how Mike McCready (guitarist in the band) thought the lyrics to a certain KISS song were, “I want to rock and roll all night…. and part of every day.”
posted by Chris on 9-3-2009 at 1:00 pm
Barry Manilow’s ‘Look’s Like we Made it\. I always thought it was Looks like Tomatoes!
posted by Danadane on 9-3-2009 at 1:04 pm
Reckless Kelly’s song Crazy Eddie’s Last Hurrah
Actual Lyric : I was a wanna be rocker
What I thought : I was a waterbed rocker
posted by Rosemary on 9-3-2009 at 1:11 pm
All this time I thought Pearl Jam’s song Glorified G was …”all five virgins on a pelican.” Huh, at least the song makes more sense now. Thanks Nick!
I also thought the end of Nirvana’a All Apolgies was “Oh no, Metallica” instead of “All in all is all we are”
posted by CC on 9-3-2009 at 1:15 pm
I had a friend who thought that Hall and Oates song\every time you go away\ said Every time you go away, you take a piece of meat with you. I still crack up when I hear it.
posted by Telula on 9-3-2009 at 1:22 pm
I can’t believe no one has mentioned Michael Jackson. I can’t even begin to transcribe all the lyrics of his songs I’ve misheard my whole life.
My favorite however is, “granny are you choking? are you choking, granny!”
posted by sara on 9-3-2009 at 1:23 pm
When my mom was younger, she always heard the Beegees’ You Should Be Dancing as “What are you doing in your neighbor’s mitten? You should be dancing!” The actual line is “What are you doing on your back?”
I was a competitive dancer in school, so we heard it a lot at competitions, and we would always say, “Oh, it’s the neighbor’s mitten song.” We didn’t look up the actual lyrics until I was out of college.
posted by Katie on 9-3-2009 at 1:26 pm
“A two-bit whore, and a wounded dog, Woolly Bully!”
posted by crocostimpy on 9-3-2009 at 1:31 pm
Those Fall Out Boy misheard lyrics videos on youtube are the best!
real line: \I’m a leading man, and the lies I weave are oh so intricate.\
misheard (and what my brother and I sing instead): I’m a little man and I’m also evil, and also into cats.
posted by dm on 9-3-2009 at 1:32 pm
More obscure … “Lips like Sugar” by Echo & the Bunnymen … I thought they sang “Lips like chickennnnnn … chicken kisses”.
posted by Dinosaur on 9-3-2009 at 1:34 pm
My brother and I used to sing and dance to “Another one bites the doctor.”
posted by Audrey on 9-3-2009 at 1:44 pm
It the song “Do-Wa-Diddy-Diddy-Dum-Diddy-Do” I thought the lyric ” I’m hers, She’s mine, Wedding bells are gonna chime” said ” I’m hurt, She’s Mad, Wedding bells are gonna chime”. I was very confused about this disfunctional relationship.
posted by Amanda on 9-3-2009 at 1:46 pm
@ kitty marie and Bert: When I was a kid, I thought they were saying “Dirty deeds and the Thunder Chief.” :)
I can’t believe no one else has mentioned Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again”: “Like a twister, I was born to walk alone.” (instead of “drifter”)
posted by Krie on 9-3-2009 at 1:49 pm
My mother would send my sister and I into giggling fits when she sang along with Creedance Clearwater Revival’s “Bad Moon on the Rise” whe she would sing “…there’s a bathroom on the right”.
posted by UNCLE WHALE on 9-3-2009 at 1:54 pm
When my husband was in a band, he got a request to play the son “Slow Talkin’ Walter”
He didn’t know it, so asked the guy to hum a few bars. It turned out he wanted to hear “Smoke on the Water”!
posted by Shawna on 9-3-2009 at 1:55 pm
From Jingle Bells:
I used to think it went like this:
“Oh What fun it is to ride in a one horse soap and sleigh”
Never really thought about what I was singing :-)
posted by Jim Prior on 9-3-2009 at 1:57 pm
My favorite misheard lyric: my dad always thought the line in Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean” was “but the chair is not my son.”
For all the Pearl Jam fans out there, I just found this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLd22ha_-VU It’s hilarious.
There was an even better one for Joe Cocker a while back, but it’s no longer online.
posted by Allison on 9-3-2009 at 1:57 pm
From the Lion King’s “Circle of Life” the swahili at the beginning:
Ingonyama
Ingonyama nengw’ enamabala (which is about a lion and leopard meeting in a field)
As a kid, I seriously thought it went:
“pink pajamas
pink pajamas penguins on the bottom”
posted by Daisy on 9-3-2009 at 2:00 pm
I am SOOOO glad to see someone else (Dana) heard “Rock Me Amadeus” as Hot Potatoes!!! I thought I was the only one. To this day I call it the hot potato song.
posted by HT on 9-3-2009 at 2:08 pm
I have two great ones!
CCR:
“There’s a bathroom on the right” (Bad Moon Rising)
Queen:
“Can o paint I’ve heard that line before” (Kinda think I’ve heard that line before–song More of That Jazz
Duh!!
Where is Ms. Kara on this one?????????????
posted by MrsPurrbottom on 9-3-2009 at 2:15 pm
Glass Tiger’s (80’s song) “Don’t Forget Me When I’m Gone” was “Don’t Throw Candy When I’m Gone” for years to me. I love this!
posted by Evil Vic on 9-3-2009 at 2:25 pm
My problem is that I always make up silly lyrics for songs. It gets hard to remember what I made up and what I mis-heard.
tee- it’s: Bus stop, wet day, she’s there, I say…
Hm. I used to hear it as Reverend Blue Jeans, too.
One day (long ago) when I was blasting the Who, my mom came in and said, “What’s all this about New Orleans?”
Who Are You / New Orleans !!
“…glorified version of a pelican.” Heh! I heard that too!
“My dad always thougth Give me the beat boys, was Give me the Beach Boys (Dobie Grey, Drift Away”
That’s the way I always heard it when I was little.
posted by BassMan on 9-3-2009 at 2:28 pm
I know it’s “Slime creatures from outer space” by Weird Al Yankovic, but I always hear “Science teachers from outer space.”
posted by Barbara on 9-3-2009 at 2:29 pm
Don’t know if this was mentioned yet, but I had a friend in college who thought Billy Idol’s \Eyes Without a Face\ was \How’s About a Date?\
I’m also a bit embarrassed to add my own mondegreen, but when I was little, I thought Boston’s \More Than A Feeling\ was \Woman of Freeway\….LOL.
posted by Eli on 9-3-2009 at 2:35 pm
“Wrapped up like a douche..: from Blinded by the Light or whatever it was called.
posted by JFS in IL on 9-3-2009 at 2:35 pm
My dad once told me that as a kid he heard, “big girls don’t cry” as “big girls, small fry” (Frankie Vallie can be a bit hard to understand on those high notes).
I myself still sing, “can’t find a butter mint…” to Pearl Jam’s “Better Man”, years after being corrected.
Oh, and a friend of my sister’s used to hear Peter Cetera’s “Restless Heart” chorus as, “Don’t leave me here with my red dress on…”.
posted by Tina on 9-3-2009 at 2:46 pm
@ Rance: It’s “Owls pukin in my bed.”
My boss and I used to have a tradition of singing the wrong lyrics to songs on the store sounds system. It was especially fun during the Holidays:
Beach Boys Little St. Nick, “ooooo Merry Christmas, Satan”
posted by emily on 9-3-2009 at 3:03 pm
Led Zeppelin’s Misty Mountain Hop:
Should be:
Would we care, to all get in line.
Heard as:
Whoopie cat, I’ll get in line.
posted by Keith on 9-3-2009 at 3:13 pm
In Dido’s song “White Flag” the lyrics are:
I will go down with this ship
And I won’t put my hands up and surrender
But I always hear:
I will go down with this ship
I will poke my eyes out and surrender
It doesn’t help that the radio station we listen to at work plays this song at least once a day.
posted by Janel on 9-3-2009 at 3:17 pm
OK.. I know these are all modern songs, but my grandmother & my mother used to sing this one to me & now I sing it to my children.. I am 37 & only a couple of months ago did I figure it out.
Mares eat oats & does (more than one female deer) eat oats & little lambs eat ivy.. a kidd’l (baby goat) eat ivy too, wouldn’t you?
I heard: marsey doats & doesy doats & little lamseydivy akidly divey too wouldn’t you?
posted by Jennifer on 9-3-2009 at 3:19 pm
I swear I have had had to hold my hand over my mouth to keep from losing it. I was shaking in silent laughter @KatieB.
This is great because we’ve made fun of my friend, Mark, for a good 17 years after he sang Nine Inch Nails’ “Terrible Lie” as “Tell the lie”.
posted by nikki on 9-3-2009 at 3:26 pm
I also thought Prodigy’s “Smack my B*tch Up” was “Snap My Picture.”
posted by Renis on 9-3-2009 at 3:33 pm
“Count the head lice on the highway…” -Elton John’s ‘Tiny Dancer’
“Pair of dice by the dashboard light” – Meatloaf’s (you guessed it) ‘Paradise by the Dashboard Light’
posted by Franx on 9-3-2009 at 3:38 pm
My best friend Andrea sang a Backstreet Boys song as “I’ll be the one to make all your showers more fun” instead of “I’ll be the one to make all your sorrows undone.”
Apparently when I was a kid I sang the Doxology as “Praise Him all creatures, here we go!” instead of “here below.”
I’ve had tons of others and also enjoyed the book “‘Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy” as a kid.
posted by Fruppi on 9-3-2009 at 3:43 pm
Just the other day one of my co-workers was on the telephone, and had been put on hold. She was singing along to the music…I heard her in her cubicle singing (To Elvis Costello’s “Everyday I write the book”) “Everyday, Everyday, Everyday I ride the bull.”
Also, when she was little, my girlfriend used to think that “Total Eclipse of the Heart” was “Totally Clips of the Heart.”
posted by mags on 9-3-2009 at 3:49 pm
A couple of classic rock songs:
1. AC/DC’s “Dirty Deeds” … for the longest time I, my brother, and my wife all thought the lyric was “dirty deeds … Thunder Chief” (it’s really “dirty deads … done dirt cheap”).
2. The Who’s “Pinball Wizard”. I always thought the song was racist … after all, they shouldn’t be singing about that “deaf, dumb, black kid” (the lyric is really “deaf, dump, BLIND kid”)
Not a classic rock song, but there is that Faith Hill song called “This Kiss” … always sounds like she’s singing about “biscuits” – ha ha ha!
posted by Steve on 9-3-2009 at 3:49 pm
For the longest time I thought that the lyrics to the song Breakfast at Tiffany’s were some sort of a recipe because I swear I could hear the words Oregano and Terragon in the chorus. When I listen to it now I’m not sure how I ever got that.
My favorite mondegreens though have to come from my younger brother who thought that the lyrics to Billi Holliday’s “Summertime” were “summertime in a limousine” and a cousin who thought that One Republic’s “Too Late to Apologize” was actually “too late to have a child.”
posted by Lu on 9-3-2009 at 4:32 pm
My old sister was convinced that the lyrics to Walking in a Winter Wonderland were \and we’ll perspire, as we dream by the fire.\
And I have yet to convince my son that the drawn out \I’m curious for you\ in Katy Perry’s I Kissed a Girl is not \I’m curry as for you\.
posted by Kate on 9-3-2009 at 4:40 pm
Sorry husband, have to add yours.
Summertime – Will Smith
Real lyric: Sit back and unwind
Husband: Sit back in Des Moines
Dont’cha – Pussycat Dolls
Real lyric: Don’t you wish your girlfriend was a freak like me?
Husband: Why would I care if my girlfriend is Greek?
L.O.V.E. – Ashlee Simpson
Real lyric: L-O-V-E
Husband: What’s lobe?
Move Your Body – Nina Sky
Real lyric: Move your body girl, makes the fellas go
Husband: Move your body like a stethoscope
Radar – Britney
Real lyric: You’re on my radar
Husband: I’m a raider
(In fairness, some of these are pretty unintelligible.)
posted by Katie on 9-3-2009 at 4:50 pm
This one is the most recent one I’ve misheard, but it’s only partly my fault – I was wondering what the title to a song was that I heard fairly often at work. All I really knew was the chorus started with the words “I am one of a kind” and included the phrase “I am Joan of Arc.”
After months of wondering about this and eventually discovering lyricrat.com, I discovered that the song was from the Chronicles of Narnia soundtrack – it’s sung by Alanis Morrisette, and it’s called “Wunderkind.” Which is a swing and a miss as far as the actual pronunciation of “wunderkind,” but there you go.
posted by Stan on 9-3-2009 at 4:50 pm
Family Guy theme song: \And all the things that make us laugh and cry\ It sounded to me like Stewie was saying \F’in’ cry\.
The Rapture: \House of, jealous lovers\ sounded to me like \Ah so, Chinese lovers\
Foo Fighters: \you’re the pretender\ sounded like \nolo contendere\ (Latin for ‘no contest’)
Dang, I know there’s so many more, but I just can’t think of them right now.
posted by Jester on 9-3-2009 at 4:51 pm
Also I remember one of my friends, who heard one of the verses in the Beatles’ “Tell Me Why” as:
“Did you have to treat me oh, so bad?
All I did was have my head unboned.”
posted by Stan on 9-3-2009 at 4:55 pm
I think the song is called ‘As I Lay Me Down’ and I think it’s by Sophie B Hawkins. During the chorus in the background, I always thought the singers are saying ‘I want a taco.’ I still think that and will probably never be convinced otherwise.
posted by BMC on 9-3-2009 at 4:56 pm
The funniest one I ever heard was “I fight with Dorothy and Dorothy always wins!”
posted by Angie on 9-3-2009 at 5:01 pm
I always have liked the modagreens better than the originals.
posted by Tim on 9-3-2009 at 5:36 pm
A website devoted to this will have you rolling! http://www.kissthisguy.com THe mis-heard lyrics and backstories…hilarity. and yes, my Dad was horrified by the CCR “bathroom on th right”
posted by H on 9-3-2009 at 5:41 pm
I always thought the Tom Petty song “Running Down a Dream” was “Running Down the Drain.”
posted by Kyle on 9-3-2009 at 5:43 pm
@Tina – (Pearl Jam’s Better Man ) was “Can’t find the Butter Man” for me :)
And Pearl Jam’s Jeremy – “Jeremy’s Smokin’… Classy”
For a throwback; my husband grew up with classic country and though Marshall Tucker Band’s “Heard it in a Love Song” was “Purty Little Love Song”
posted by jmco12 on 9-3-2009 at 5:51 pm
My favorite that I miss understood was “Jesus is just a rat with wings.” I thought it was some kind of anti christian song.
posted by David on 9-3-2009 at 5:51 pm
I loved the Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy book! When I was a kid and listening to “The Land Down Under” I thought Men at Work were singing “You better run, you better take the bus!” after asking if we could hear the thunder. It made sense to me at the time…why would anyone want to walk in a rainstorm?
I also thought Don Henley was singing about bra straps shining in the sun during the chorus to Boys of Summer.
posted by Kate on 9-3-2009 at 6:20 pm
the opening line to “Don’t Get Around Much Anymore” is: Mr. Saturday Dance! that’s the joke anyway.
I used to think that the Beatles’ “Penny Lane” was: “And Elaine is in my ears and in my eyes!” took me a long time to put the two together and get the song right.
posted by the creature on 9-3-2009 at 6:22 pm
Return to Sender by elvis was always Return Jacinda to me.
Hey, her address was unknown, it made sense to me.
posted by k8 on 9-3-2009 at 6:26 pm
What are the back up singers saying in the Chumbawumba song Tubthumping?
It sounds like they are saying don’t cry for me extra neighbor, but I want to know what they are really saying.
posted by SB on 9-3-2009 at 6:32 pm
For years I sang “Dirty deeds done dirt cheap” as “Dur dee dee dun dur jeep.” It was only when my boyfriend pointed it out (while laughing) did I realize that there were actual words to it.
posted by Miko on 9-3-2009 at 6:42 pm
When I first heard a particular Frankie Valli song I thought he was saying “My Sweet Georgia” but everyone told me it was “My eyes adored ya”. Years later I heard an interview in which Frankie said that the original version was “My Sweet Georgia” but during the playback it sounded like “My eyes adored ya” so they rerecorded the song saying “My eyes adored ya”. So I misheard the original lyrics.
posted by tone deaf on 9-3-2009 at 7:45 pm
Def Leppard, Pour Some Sugar on Me: “You got the beat cuz I got the (unintelligible)” instead of “you got the peaches, I got the cream”
The Go-Gos: “Alex the Seal” instead of “Our Lips are Sealed”
Louie Louie by the Kingsmen: pretty much whatever the hell you want to make up because it’s completely unintelligible anyway.
posted by eric! on 9-3-2009 at 8:13 pm
My husband thought “Downtown Venus” went “I’ve got the penis and I can’t get behind myself”
posted by Lorelei on 9-3-2009 at 8:16 pm
Okay, I’ve been told this is completely ridiculous. But every time I heard Billy Joel’s “River of Dreams” up until a few years ago, I always thought he said:
“I don’t know about life after this, God knows I’ve never been a squeamish man”
When in fact it says:
“Don’t know about life after this, God knows I’ve never been a spiritual man.”
A friend told me the only way someone could think it said “squeamish” instead of “spiritual” if you were listening to the song with your fingers in your ears while screaming at the top of your lungs.
I wasn’t.
posted by Katie D on 9-3-2009 at 9:03 pm
Also Dave Barry:
John Denver’s Annie’s Song
“you fill out my census”
rather than, “you fill up my senses”
Michael Jackson’s Billy Jean
“The chair is not my son”
rather than, “seriously, isn’t that what he’s saying?”
My own:
Tracy Chapman’s Smoke and Ashes, I hear as “smoking hashish”.
Shania Twain’s I Feel Like a Woman
“cum in my hair do what I dare”
rather than “combing my hair…”
sorry for the vulgarity!
posted by itchybrain on 9-3-2009 at 9:16 pm
O.K beat this one. From Alanis Morisette’s ‘Ironic’ It’s a death row pardon two minutes too late. As heard by the wife: It’s a death row hard on two minutes too late.
posted by Arky on 9-3-2009 at 9:19 pm
My autistic son does this all the time. In fact, if he can’t make out the words to a song, he repeats exactly what he heard, which makes him sound like he’s singing in Simlish! His version of Michael Jackson’s “Beat It” – Beat it, beat it, no one want’s to be repeated. Show them a funky song if it’s night, it doesn’t matter who’s left or who’s right, just beat it.
posted by proud mama on 9-3-2009 at 9:39 pm
Also, on Good Charlotte’s “Anthem,” my mom always sings:
“I’ll never use a rat comb”
instead of
“Another loser anthem.”
She’s got lots of those.
posted by Katie D on 9-3-2009 at 9:48 pm
OMG….SO many that I know and love…can’t list them all, but:
“Hellfire”/”Elvira” Oak ridge Boys
“Everybody Wants to Move Away”/”Everybody Want to Rule the World”–Tears for Fears
“When the dead make love..”/”We’re the deadbeat club” –B-52’s
posted by Marty on 9-3-2009 at 11:53 pm
I used to think (and still prefer) Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody “Gotta moose, gotta moose, can it do the fandango”….
posted by Professor on 9-4-2009 at 12:50 am
My Lady Mondegreen moment is from the Friends theme song.
“I’ll be there for you! Like a little sausage roll!”
The actual lyric is apparently, “I’ll be there for you when the rain starts to pour.”
I thought sausage roll was perfectly reasonable – after all, when friends are down, you bring them their favourite comfort food, right?
posted by Mrs Khan on 9-4-2009 at 1:13 am
It seems that no one really understands “Blinded by the light”! I was always surprised that they sang such an openly gay song in the 70’s with the lyrics “little early birdy gave my anus curly-whirly…”
It’s actually, “little Early-Pearly came by in his curly-wurly…”
posted by FreeThinker on 9-4-2009 at 1:23 am
From Cher’s ‘Believe’, I always thought it was ‘do you believe in love everlasting’ instead of ‘do you believe in life after love’
like a lot of others, there are a whole bunch more but I can’t think of them now…
this was a lot of fun to read! great post!
posted by ann on 9-4-2009 at 1:42 am
Beachboys first line of “Help me Rhonda”
Well since she put me down I got owls
poopin’ in my bed.
posted by emaneff on 9-4-2009 at 2:23 am
Can’t believe no ones mentioned a variant of this yet (at least not that I’ve seen) but the Australian anthem is commonly misheard by youngchildren as ‘Australians all are ostriches’. Actual lyric: Australians all, let us rejoice.
posted by alex on 9-4-2009 at 2:29 am
And no one has mentioned:
She’s… so… Popular!
from Games without Frontiers, Peter Gabriel. S’posed to be “Jeux sans frontiers”. I’ve also heard that other people have thought it was:
- She’s so Avuncular
or
- She’s so f**k me now!
posted by Mare on 9-4-2009 at 5:16 am
In “Every Breath You Take” there is a line that goes “How my poor heart aches, with every step you take.” My friend insists that the line is “I’m a pool hall ace, with every step you take.” As proof, she says that Sting is seen playing pool at this point in the video.
This same friend also listened to “Pleasant Valley Sunday” by the Monkees and thought that the line “here in status symbol land” was “here instead of simple land.”
posted by Jaclyn McKewan on 9-4-2009 at 8:58 am
When I was a teenager I thought Gregg Allman was singing, “The bar asshole” instead of “The bell has tolled.”
posted by Melissa on 9-4-2009 at 9:43 am
And I had a friend in college who would sing, “Freak out in the garden” instead of “Reach out in the darkness”
posted by Melissa on 9-4-2009 at 9:45 am
For years me and my friend always thought That CCR’s Bad Moon a’Rising had said “there’s a bathroom on the right”
posted by ALicia on 9-4-2009 at 10:03 am
I thought Misty Mountain Hop had “whoopie cat” in it, too!
posted by Jen Sweeney on 9-4-2009 at 10:13 am
From Superfreak by Rick James:
“The kind of girl you read about
In new-wave magazines”
I always thought the line was “the kind of girl you read about in Newsweek magazine.”
I always thought it was a weird shout-out by Rick James.
posted by Jim on 9-4-2009 at 10:30 am
“The Thing That Should Not Be” by Metallica
I heard:
“Lurking beneath the sea
Great old one
For Pete’s sake
He searches”
posted by Patty on 9-4-2009 at 1:36 pm
In the beginning of the Rolling Stones tune, the choir is singing, “You can’t always get what you wa-ant. No you can’t always get what you wa-ant.”
I had never given that a second thought until someone pointed out that it sounded exactly like:
“You can’t always get a chihuahua. No, you can’t always get a chihuahua.”
Now I can’t hear anything else.
posted by Greg on 9-4-2009 at 4:39 pm
The Who’s “Eminence Front”. I could never figure out what they were saying…. was it
“it’s a lemon in front”, or “it’s an imminent spurt”, or
“it’s lenin in spurs”, or “it’s an imminent front” ?
And “Rock me Amadeus” was “Rock Me on a Dais” to me…
posted by tona b. on 9-4-2009 at 5:08 pm
In “Games without Frontiers” by Peter Gabriel I always heard “She’s so funky, yeah” when they sing “Jeux sans frontiers”.
posted by PJ on 9-4-2009 at 6:47 pm
Julia, back in high school, my sectionmates and I would all sing “Secret Asian Man” during pep band at the basketball games. :)
“Secret Aging Man” was always a favourite as well.
posted by Jenny on 9-5-2009 at 12:02 am
“… and you come to me, on a submarine…”
(how deep is your love)
posted by ashcof on 9-5-2009 at 12:33 pm
one more ‘Blinded by the Light’ mondegreen: as a kid, I thought it was ’stranded by the lihgt’
posted by ann on 9-5-2009 at 2:35 pm
Since I was a kid, I have been mishearing lyrics. The classic one that has become a staple joke in my family was The Beatles’ “Twist and Shout”:
Mondegreen lyrics:
Shakin’ the baby now (Shakin’ the baby)
Original lyrics:
Shake it up baby now (Shake it up baby)
Another, from my dad:
Mondegreen lyrics:
Cold jelly on the mountain
Original lyrics:
Go tell it on the mountain
And…
Mondegreen lyrics:
There’s a bathroom on the right
Original lyrics:
There’s a bad moon on the right
posted by Laurel on 9-6-2009 at 1:57 am
I still maintain that the lyrics to Hanson’s \Mmmbop\ is:
Mmmbop, the bitch is damn fine
posted by Emma B on 9-9-2009 at 10:18 pm
For the Catholics out there, there was a part of Mass when we sang, “Jesus, prince of peace, you take away the sins of the world…” As a small child, I could never understand why they kept calling Jesus the Prince of Thieves, because I was pretty sure that was Robin Hood.
My dad almost had to leave church when I finally asked him about it.
posted by Abby on 9-11-2009 at 4:55 pm