Our friends over at everythingisterrible have been busy combing through dusty piles of VHS tapes, looking for bizarre gems that time forgot. Many, many of them turn out to be from instructional how-to videos, which appear to be semi-homemade (or at least self-funded). Here are some of our favorites. (Note: everythingisterrible edits their videos to highlight the most ridiculous bits. Do not adjust your set!)

Whip Cracking Made Easy

Confident Public Speaking

As explained by the world’s worst prop comedian.

THE WORST PROP COMEDIAN EVER! from Everything Is Terrible on Vimeo.

Predicting the Weather for Pilots

Crazy eyes make me not trust you, pilot man!

Well, hello fellow pilots… from Everything Is Terrible on Vimeo.

Let’s Go (Web) Surfing!

But wait: first you’ll need at least 4 megabytes of RAM!

Get A New Girlfriend — With Math!

I don’t remember doing my homework ever being this fun.

How to Make Turkey Calls with Your Mouth

The video box reads: “Hunting the North American Wild Turkey provides the ultimate challenge to even seasoned hunters. Learn how to outsmart these cagey birds from professional hunter and award-winning turkey caller, Jerry Antley.”

Moms Hate Bedwetters

“This short informative video was made in 1999 by the Rhone-Poulenc pharmaceutical company to tell kids all about DDAVP tablets in a hip way that kids would understand.” The opening reenactment of an actual bed-wetting/mom-hating incident is priceless.

A Woman’s Guide to Watching Football

“It’s just a big jumble of bodies, and I don’t get it!!” Help is on the way, Lois.

Pumpkin Carving Made Easy!

This man has carved more than 4,000 pumpkins in eight years. That is insane.

THE PUNKIN MAN! from Everything Is Terrible on Vimeo.

The 3 Keys to Successful Conduit Bending

The computer animations are especially nice here.