So you think your mother-in-law is torturous? Or your boss with the lame sense of humor? Get a load of the following nine insane torture techniques used in different parts of the world to kill, dismember, or otherwise cause inordinate amounts of pain. We promise: you’ll never use the word torturous the same way again.
1. Chinese Bamboo Torture
As you probably know, bamboo is one of the fastest growing plants on earth. Although there’s no real proof that it was used, Chinese Bamboo Torture took advantage of bamboo’s propensity to grow quickly. How quickly? Well, some varieties in parts of China grow as much as three feet in a single day. In addition to ancient China, many believe that the Japanese used Chinese Bamboo Torture on POWs during WWII.
How it worked:
1. Tips of living bamboo were cut sharp to create a spear.
2. The victim was suspended horizontally above such a patch of bamboo.
3. The bamboo pierced through the victim’s skin and continued to grow through his abdomen, ultimately causing one of the most painful deaths ever inflicted.
Watch the Mythbusters prove that Chinese Bamboo Torture is possible.
2. The Iron Maiden
Like bamboo torture, the Iron Maiden is sometimes thought to be fictional. But this torture technique, using an upright sarcophagus with spikes on the inner surfaces, definitely existed. Invented in the late 18th century, this is the device that the metal band Iron Maiden took their name from.
How it worked:
1. The victim was forced into the spiked sarcophagus and shut in.
2. The short spikes welded into the chamber weren’t long enough to kill anyone, but did plenty of damage and inflicted enough pain that an interrogator on the outside was usually able to get a confession.
3. If not, nails and other sharp objects like knives, were inserted into the chamber, inflicting more pain.
4. Generally, between the spikes and the knives, victims would bleed to death after said confession, or sometimes before.
5. Some Iron Maidens also had spikes in place to puncture the eyes.
3. Scaphism (aka “The Boats”)
The word scaphism comes from the Greek word skaphe, meaning scooped or hollowed. An ancient Persian method of torture, wherein the victim was eaten alive by bugs, scaphism was also known as “the boats” for reasons you’ll understand momentarily.
How it worked:
1. A captive was stripped naked and chained to a pair of back-to-back narrow rowboats or hollowed out tree trunks.
2. The captive was then left to float on a stagnant pond.
3. He was then force fed copious amounts of milk and honey.
4. The victim would develop serious diarrhea, which would in turn attract insects.
5. The insects would then feed on the victim’s exposed flesh.
4. The Choke Pear
The Choke Pear was popular during the Middle Ages. Crimes worthy of choke pear torture included blasphemy, lying, having a miscarriage, and homosexual intercourse. Depending on the crime, the torturer would insert the pear into a different part of the criminal’s body. Women usually got it in the vagina, homosexuals in the anus, and liars and blasphemers in the mouth.
How it worked:
1. An instrument consisting of sharpened leaf-like segments was inserted into the victim’s orifice.
2. The torturer turned a screw at the top, causing the leafs to open, slowly.
3. As the leafs separated, severe internal mutilation occurred.
5. The Brazen Bull
Designed in ancient Greece, the Brazen Bull was a hollowed brass bull statue designed and invented by Perillos of Athens, commissioned, if you will, by Phalaris, the tyrant of Acragas in Sicily.
How it worked:
1. Victims were locked into the hollowed brass bull.
2. A fire was lit under the bull.
3. The victim was roasted alive.
4. The design of the bull’s head was such that the victim’s screams were made to sound like the bull roaring.
5. The scorched remains were often made into bracelets and sold at market.
6. Rat Torture
One of the most widely recognized forms of bizarre torture, thanks in part to the movie 2 Fast 2 Furious, rat torture is thought to be an ancient Chinese technique. Below, however, we’ll describe a particular form of rat torture developed by Diederik Sonoy, a leader during the Dutch revolt of the 16th century.
How it worked:
1. A prisoner was chained down naked on a table.
2. Large, heavy bowls with disease-infected rats were placed open-side down on the prisoner.
3. Hot charcoal was piled on top of the bowls, agitating the rats.
4. In an attempt to escape from the hot bowls, the rats would gnaw their way through the victim’s flesh.
7. Judas Cradle
The Spanish Inquisition was known for its many torture devices, and the Judas Cradle was one of the most painful. Also known as the Judas chair, victims usually died of infection, as the seat was never cleaned between uses.
How it worked:
1. The victim was placed on top of a pyramid-shaped seat, with both legs tied together.
2. The chair’s point was usually inserted into the anus or vagina, stretching the orifice.
3. The victim was slowly lowered via ropes.
4. The torture might last a few hours or, sometimes, a few days.
8. Crushing by Elephant
For thousands of years, crushing by elephant was a commonly practiced form of torture in Southeast Asia and India. Given the animals’ shear weight, intelligence and susceptibility to training (as we know from the circus), elephants were an obvious choice.
How it worked:
1. Victims were tied down on the floor.
2. Elephants were led into the room to stomp on the victim’s head.
3. Often they prolonged the agony by first dismembering victims.
9. The Rack
What short list of torture techniques would be complete without the infamous rack? Consisting of a long wooden board and a couple of rollers, the rack was first used on early Christian martyrs like Vincent of Saragossa, who was tortured to death around the year 300. And, as we’ve seen all too often in bad Hollywood films, as interrogation assistance, simply forcing a prisoner to watch someone else suffering on the rack was generally enough to get him talking. Anyone who survived the rack was generally unable to use his muscles for the remainder of his life. Good times!
How it worked:
1. The victim was chained to rollers at both ends of the device’s wooden frame and then pulled in opposite directions.
2. By ratcheting up the tension on the rollers, the victim’s limbs were ripped out of their sockets.
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I still think Woody Allen movies are worse.
posted by Dave on 10-19-2009 at 9:30 am
What a pleasant way to start a Monday :)
posted by Greg Tatum on 10-19-2009 at 9:48 am
Sweet, now I know what to do with the prisoners locked in my basement! *rubs hands together*
posted by SomeDude on 10-19-2009 at 11:26 am
Nothing like reading about torture devices while listening to “angel of death” by Slayer….which is about Josef Mengele…who seem to do a lot of torturing himself
posted by andy on 10-19-2009 at 12:15 pm
@Dave – ha! I was thinking number 10 should be a dial-up connection…
posted by David K. Israel on 10-19-2009 at 12:17 pm
Is “2 Fast 2 Furious” really more widely known than “1984?” Society is now officially doomed.
posted by Kyle on 10-19-2009 at 12:32 pm
Dave, them’s fightin’ words.
posted by Tonberry2k on 10-19-2009 at 1:08 pm
@ Kyle: Agreed.
When people today say “Times are hard”… they should consider this article. Times aren’t so hard…
posted by Shash on 10-19-2009 at 1:15 pm
The choke pear was used as a murder weapon in an episode of Bones (happened to be on TNT last week). Personally my favorite part of the episode was the sword fight between Bones and the Black Knight. The humor was somewhat lost when the Black Knight literally received “just a flesh wound”
recaptcha: before-dinner presaged
posted by Hastings on 10-19-2009 at 1:27 pm
Kind of makes water-boarding seem like a walk in the park in comparison.
posted by Jim on 10-19-2009 at 1:33 pm
Miscarriage? Is this a euphemism for abortion or was a biological process women have no control over and DO NOT WANT TO HAPPEN considered a crime?
posted by Cy Guy on 10-19-2009 at 1:39 pm
I watched something recently about this…they tested the choke pear and said that, based upon the design, it wouldn’t actually have worked. The pressure would have been too great and the metal ‘leaves’ of the pear would have bent.
posted by Kate on 10-19-2009 at 1:45 pm
Just a curious question to fellow flossers: if you had to chose one of these tortures, which seems the less painful/more tolerable/more apt to bring a swifter death?
I was thinking about The Boats…at least I wouldn’t be suffocating; it would be more like a pleasant outing on a lake, right?! lol
posted by Marty on 10-19-2009 at 1:47 pm
There’s actually no hard, definitive evidence that THE Iron Maiden was ever used. In fact, the history of the Iron Maiden was invented by a man showcasing one in his circus. Also, according to Wikipedia, Elizabeth Bathory had a device consisting of a coffin and nails that she used in a similar fashion, but the “Iron Maiden” as it’s posted here and famously depicted in the film Sleepy Hollow was probably never used.
Also according to wikipedia (I know I know) the iron maiden may have been used by Udaq Hussein on Iraqi soccer players. So……….. yeah.
posted by Joel on 10-19-2009 at 1:55 pm
I would choose the Iron Maiden, as long as it wasn’t one that was equipped to take out my eyeballs! Seems like it was the only one I would have a chance of surviving.
posted by Shash on 10-19-2009 at 1:58 pm
Kyle, that reminds me of a headline I saw the other day about some kids that were pulling crimes wearing what the article described as “V for Vendetta” masks instead of “Guy Fawkes” masks.
posted by Sandy Wood on 10-19-2009 at 2:03 pm
What about “The Machine” located in the Pit of Despair?
posted by graham on 10-19-2009 at 2:21 pm
Fun stuff!! If I had a choice it would to bave an elephant smash my head, like getting an head cut off, quick and easy.
As part of my military trainig I have been water boarded, unpleasant, but not a pear up your butt!
posted by 'Da guy on 10-19-2009 at 3:02 pm
Kate: I remember seeing that, but personally, I wouldn’t want it tested on myself to find out :)
Well, guess if I had to pick one I’d go with old Stampy the elephant, if I could get one quick stomp and be done with it.
posted by TheBear on 10-19-2009 at 3:13 pm
Hrm, my favorite was one done by the French where they tied you down naked with your abdomen over a badger hole, and then they smoked the badger out from the other end. Kinda like the rats.
posted by bryan on 10-19-2009 at 3:39 pm
I find myself agreeing with the elephant (@TheBear, thanks for naming him Stampy, that makes my pseudo-torture-death day) – quick and efficient. I feel like no matter WHERE an elephant steps on my head, it’ll be the end. I think the Judas Chair would be the worst – ugh, no thanks.
posted by OkieMelissa on 10-19-2009 at 3:55 pm
“The victim was suspended horizontally above such a patch of bamboo.”
Like in a hammock? If so, I choose that one (hahaha, j/k).
posted by OkieMelissa on 10-19-2009 at 4:11 pm
@ Marty
“Crucifixion? Good. Out of the door, line on the left, one cross each. Next?”
posted by Jonny on 10-19-2009 at 4:56 pm
@TheBear and @OkieMelissa RE Stampy: They said they would often dismember victims before they let Stampy at ya! FORGET THAT!
posted by Shash on 10-19-2009 at 5:06 pm
@graham – Nice “Princess Bride” reference! I wouldn’t want to go like that though – having all those suction cups ripping my life out of me would be too painful (especially when cranked up to 50)!
If anything, I would choose something quick, like being crushed to death by Stampy.
BTW – no mention of the wheel? Victims would have their limbs threaded through the spokes of a large wheel, then as it spun, people would smash their limbs with clubs! Good times…
posted by Steve from San Diego on 10-19-2009 at 6:37 pm
And if the elephants were highly trained enough, they could be directed to exert pressure in slowly increasing degrees. I’ve seen tapes of Asian elephant shows where the foot is oh so delicately placed ON the tourist’s abdomen. How much harder would it be to train for torture pressure control?
posted by VM on 10-19-2009 at 6:38 pm
They forgot to mention being boiled in oil. Typically a person was placed in the oil while the oil was still cold, and then be left in there until they died.
posted by Drew on 10-20-2009 at 2:00 am
i was in prague thus summer and there is a great museum of torture techniques and instruments. it covers three floors and is very quiet. i was with one friend and there were not other visitors, and the only worker was on the first floor to take tickets.
it was very cool, the rooms were filled with different torture devices with detailed descriptions on how to use them =)
what i found out that night is that many, many of them were invented my austrians, which my friend found amusing since i am of austrian nationality and very into creepy things like torture devices and ghosts.
posted by karina on 10-20-2009 at 5:38 pm
I heard the spikes were added to the iron maiden at least a century after it was originally designed. before then it didn’t kill people, just kept them in the dark without food for days.
posted by none on 10-20-2009 at 11:54 pm
Glad to see my personal favorite the Judas Chair listed. The death by insect is a new one to me. Maybe Chris Hitchens would be up for trying that one..?
posted by MIke @ Buzzchow on 10-25-2009 at 10:43 pm
By far, the worst device not listed was the spanish donkey. Basically a wooden stand with a v-shaped top. The victim would be placed in a straddle position on top, and weights would be tied to the legs as to slowly slice you in half.
posted by David on 10-27-2009 at 12:58 pm
It is also thought that iron maidens may have been used more as a means of forcing a person to stand perfectly still for extended periods (with spikes sometimes used an added inducement to remain standing, because they meant you couldn’t lean your weight on the sides). Forcing a person to stand for prolonged periods remains a popular torture method even today. You periodically even hear of interrogators in the US being called out for using it. (It is against the Geneva Convention.)
I’m surprised drawing and quartering wasn’t mentioned. In drawing, the person’s abdomen is opened, and their entrails yanked out with a metal hook, while they are still alive. (It is ultimately fatal, of course.) In quartering, their limbs are tied to draft horses, which are then driven in opposite directions to tear the victim apart. According to legend, William Wallace (“Braveheart”) went this way.
Crushing by stones (recounted in “The Crucible,” a mostly historical work) was another method. Stones or other heavy weights are progressively piled on top of the victim until he/she either capitulates or perishes.
Regarding why a woman might be punished for miscarriage — this is astonishing to our modern sensibilities, but you must understand that women have not always been treated fairly. Indeed, there are parts of the world where women are still tortured, maimed, or murdered for having a miscarriage, for failing to conceive, or even for bearing a child of the wrong sex. It’s rare in the West, where this is considered abuse, but culturally acceptable in some places. One famous historical example is Anne Boleyn, whose marriage to Henry VIII turned sour after she miscarried at least one male fetus. (There were political factors too, but if you look at the pattern of Henry VIII’s six marriages, it’s clear that he was looking for a son.)
Ironically, though Henry eventually did get his male heir (who succeeded him as Edward VI), it was Anne’s daughter by Henry who would have the greatest legacy: Elizabeth I, who died without issue, ending the Tudor dynasty.
So yes, barbaric as it is by our standards, women were frequently blamed for miscarriages. Indeed, a woman’s main value was her fertility, which is why so much was tied up in her chastity and her eventual faithfulness to her husband. While the “choke pear” may have been a later invention (or used mainly to spook potential offenders), it is indisputable that many women throughout history have been tortured and killed simply for not producing the desired offspring.
posted by Calli Arcale on 10-27-2009 at 5:26 pm
no Catherine Wheel?
posted by Melodye on 10-27-2009 at 11:21 pm
And wher is thorture technik of from protestant part of the world or you think that wos’t hapend there ? dsf
posted by black ed on 10-28-2009 at 4:17 pm
Ahh those silly christians and their toys
posted by XxX on 10-29-2009 at 12:51 pm
Two not mentioned: One a great friend who is a walking encyclopedia told me about was used by the Mongols – Pouring molten silver into the eyes or ears of prisoners.
And one mentioned by Kafka, I believe, was the Room of Discomfort(exact name?) Basically a room that is too short to stand up fully and too narrow to stretch out fully on the floor, causing you to never be able to stretch out your body…talk about an incredibly slow mental torture. I know it sounds benign compared to these others, but the psychological discomfort over the course of months would eventually drive you nuts.
posted by Rob on 11-2-2009 at 6:58 pm
When I was a child watching trained elephants on TV, my mother said tame elephants exert extreme care around people so as NOT to step on them and hurt them. They know they’re big. Therefore, Stampy (LOL) would probably have to have mental issues of his own to willingly squish humans, whether it was slow or fast. Imagine having a deranged elephant squishing you.
posted by Siobhan on 11-3-2009 at 3:32 pm
No glass tube torture?
Long, very thin glass tube + male genitalia + hammer = horrid mental picture.
posted by Joshua on 1-11-2010 at 5:02 pm
A popular Norse torture/death sentence was to slit the victim’s stomach open, take out the intestine, tie it to a tree, and make the victim walk around the tree until they died.
That, and making them listen to Justin Beiber on 11 ^^
posted by Diana on 3-19-2011 at 3:39 pm