Chris Higgins
The Late Movies: 90-Minute Critique of Star Wars Episode II
by Chris Higgins - April 7, 2010 - 10:00 PM

The Late Movies

Okay, I don’t think I’m going out on a limb by saying that Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones is a really bad movie. We know this. We are sad about it, but we know this to be true. So our old friend from the 70-minute critique of The Phantom Menace is back, now with a 90-minute critique/review/parody of the film. Now, I want to warn you — these videos contain swearing and what I can only call “comedic misogyny,” but I found them super-funny and also a surprisingly good review of how movies should be made — how to structure acts, build characters, and so on.

So, if you dare, check it out….

Part 1

“Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones is the worst thing ever made by a human, except for the bagpipes.”

Part 2

“George starts throwing the plot at us, which is basically the exact same plot as the last film.”

Part 3

Bright Lights, Dumb City.

Part 4

A detailed discussion of what 19-year-old males look for in a mate.

Part 5

Why murdering women and children is a pretty good reason not to marry a guy.

Part 6

The Samuel L. Jackson connection.

Part 7

George Lucas ruins the Lightsaber and the Force all in one scene.

Part 8

Bigger is not always betterer. “George Lucas proves that he is the master of ruining things.”

Part 9

Ripping off Blade Runner and screwing up Yoda. Oh, George.

If you like this stuff, there is MUCH, MUCH MORE on the RedLetterMedia YouTube Channel.

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Comments (8)

  1. It’s so funny but so sad at how much Lucas ruined something so special.

    posted by Harry on 4-8-2010 at 9:48 am

  2. The “comic misogyny” just isn’t amusing, but at least in this series, he kept it to the end of each segment so I could just switch over to the next one.

    I’ll be curious to see his Episode III review, because I thought that one was actually a halfway decent film. But I’m probably wrong. Or stupid.

    posted by Seth on 4-8-2010 at 11:20 am

  3. BTW, using clips from The Last Starfighter was genius.

    posted by Seth on 4-8-2010 at 1:03 pm

  4. If you didn’t like Attack of the Clones, why do you need someone who made a 90-minute video to refute what you feel?

    Just saying.

    posted by Dan on 4-8-2010 at 1:26 pm

  5. Seth: In less than 30 minutes of footage and for cheap-as-free the guy created a multi-act plot with a clear protagonist and antagonist each with apparent goals. He built situations that are genuinely tense for extended periods of time. He basically creates a mini-movie that succeeds where Attack of the Clones fails. That’s him walking the walk.

    posted by ninjasuperspy on 4-8-2010 at 5:45 pm

  6. Dan: it’s entertainment, really. If I gave a damn about the Star Wars movies perhaps I’d see it differently — but for me, this is just a really amusing and well-put-together film critique. And yes, I am a big enough nerd that I will watch 90 minutes of some guy mumbling about Attack of the Clones. :)

    ninjasuperspy: AND THERE ARE PIZZA ROLLS!! :)

    posted by Chris Higgins on 4-8-2010 at 6:01 pm

  7. @ninja: You’ll get no argument from me that the review is genius and the movie stinks. I’ve watched the Episode 1 and 2 reviews several times and laughed out loud not a few times. I will never say “Protagonist” correctly again.

    I just didn’t find the humor in the bondage stuff. Not saying he did a bad job with it, or disrespecting his knowledge of story and film in any way. Yes, it’s well-executed. Still. Yuck.

    I’m still genuinely curious to see his EpIII review.

    posted by Seth on 4-8-2010 at 7:42 pm

  8. I spent 90+ minutes watching the EP II review last night and it was funny, insightful, and a bit disturbing in parts. Well worth watching IMO.

    posted by dan1101 on 4-9-2010 at 12:20 pm

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