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None of my close friends have written books. I’m not here to scold them, I’m just saying. On this topic my inner circle can’t help.
So let me address the published authors in the audience. My question is this: What’s the etiquette when it comes to your friends reading (and buying) your book?
One ride home back in December, I found myself without reading material. I’m a veteran commuter; this was a rookie oversight. To guarantee next-morning entertainment, I stopped at the local library. Maybe fellow mental_floss contributor David Israel’s book was available, I thought. Immediately I felt cheap and dirty. I’m not sure if he gets paid per copy sold, but I know the Ruth L. Rockwood Memorial Library was not kicking up royalties.
David’s book was already checked out. (Side question: Is that a good feeling?) But I had apparently already angered the publishing gods. In the parking lot, an 80-year-old man slammed into my car as I watched and honked and hollered. Perhaps that license he was issued during the FDR administration shouldn’t be a lifetime pass. But his incredibly poor driving is another story (found here, if you’re into car crash stories).
Should I have felt bad about borrowing Behind Everyman as opposed to buying it? How long do you give your friends to read your stuff before you start hounding them? Has this caused any friction in relationships?
So I ask again: What’s the etiquette?
(Feel free to give your book a little plug for participating in my little survey.)
Comments (16)
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Libraries pay for books or lease them and this helps writers, no? They also foster a love of books and encourage purchase of favorite writers’ other works.
Just as radio stations pay reduced fees because they provide the exposure necessary to sell music, libraries have always seemed to me to be the writer’s friend.
posted by Tom on 4-18-2007 at 10:09 am
You are not required to buy your friends book initially – However- if you did enjoy it a kind gesture would be to give it as a gift to other friends. K
posted by Kim on 4-18-2007 at 10:21 am
I think it probably varies.
I once had a professor who was a published author. He thought it was courteous to give free copies to his friends and colleagues, and he complained about a fellow professor who expected people to buy his book.
posted by Kyle on 4-18-2007 at 10:26 am
The plug you just gave his book on your website makes up for any bad book etiquette that you have committed.
posted by kellie on 4-18-2007 at 10:32 am
If you can’t screw a buddy out of some money, then what good is he?
posted by Leonard Klaatu on 4-18-2007 at 10:42 am
I don’t know if it’s fair to ask or expect someone to read your book unless it’s out of professional courtesy or expressed interest. Though I am not published, I do have a few blogs on different topics, and I would never dare assume that someone would enjoy reading my content. If the subject matter is something they’ve expressed interest in, then perhaps it’s worth mentioning, or even giving a free copy. In fact, I would be annoyed — as I have been in the past — by people who say “Look, I’ve published a book. Read it!” Hm. Well, would I read it if it wasn’t your book? Is it on something that interests me, or will I be bored to tears and have to lie to your face later? I don’t want to be put in that position either.
Perhaps we need to compare it to a different medium. If you had an amazing portfolio of photographs and someone wanted a copy or print, they’d be expected to buy it unless it was a special gift from you, the artist, right? Should books really be treated any differently?
posted by Stephanie on 4-18-2007 at 11:03 am
I have an old college buddy that has written a few books. As a courtesy to him, I have bought the ones I am aware of. I figure, if I can afford it I should support my buddies. He has offered to give me copies, I told him I already bought them.
Although, I can’t say that I’ve completely read the ones I have bought. The responsibilities in my life limit my reading to 20 minute snipets a few times a week, so I have rarely been able to read full books.
posted by Stew on 4-18-2007 at 11:13 am
Though it sounds fatuous, I am a published author. I let my friends off the hook by not only assuming that they have not read my books, but also by not bringing up my books in conversation with them. That way, nobody needs to feel awkward.
Further, there is absolutely no shame in reading a friend’s book that’s been borrowed from the library. After all, the library book was purchased, giving the author a royalty. Most writers are sensible enough to know that they’re not going to gain untold riches; they write to connect with their readers.
So at signings, I often encourage undecided book buyers to sample my work at the library first. My thinking is that if they like it, I’ve got good word-of-mouth. I’ve found that a lot of my books are purchased as gifts as a result.
posted by Bart King on 4-18-2007 at 11:27 am
In a parallel thread, I have a friend who is a musician. She stores boxes of her CDs, which she is never hard-pressed to part with, at home. I haven’t, however, seen her since before her new CD was released (more than a few months ago).
On my last trip to a thriving metropolis, I found her CD. (I imagine, Jason, that finding a book checked out is a fantastic feeling; I was excited just to find her name on a little black card under Rock/Alternative.) I was happy to buy the CD to support my friend. If anyone I know writes a book, I will do the same thing.
posted by Kate on 4-18-2007 at 12:35 pm
I think you should give up reading books while driving.
posted by Miss Cellania on 4-18-2007 at 12:37 pm
Thanks for the plug, Jason. It’s an interesting point you raise, one I’ve actually thought about a lot. Most of my close friends bought the book at one of the readings I did while on book tour. How could they not, right? There’s a lot of public pressure to stand in line and have your book signed by your pal.
Many of my students wind up taking the book out of the library, which is fine. I think it’s great that they’re reading it and only hope, if they like it, they’ll suggest it to someone or perhaps buy a copy for someone’s birthday.
Interestingly, I get a fair amount of fan-mail, and almost always the letters are from people who’ve checked the book out of the library. That seems to suggest that the type of person who doesn’t need to own a book is also the type of person who’ll go the extra mile and write a fan letter. It’s odd, but I estimate 80% of all the emails I receive are from folk who’ve discovered me in the public library.
Perhaps they have a lot of time on their hands? WHo knows. But it’s nice to know people care and people still visit the old library.
posted by David on 4-18-2007 at 1:04 pm
I am working on a novel now, and I just hope someone reads it and feels something from it. I really haven’t thought about whether or not it would be lucrative. I guess that’s because I’m a poet at heart. You never expect to make any dough, but you love to hear someone say “Hey, I saw your poem was printed in such and such…”
Libraries do so much good for so many. Knowledge and Art should never be limited to the priviledged.
posted by Allison on 4-18-2007 at 2:01 pm
YA novelists John Green and Maureen Johnson appear to be quite in favor of public libraries and stuff, as evidenced by a Brotherhood 2.0 vblog entry – they discuss it about halfway through.
posted by Higgins on 4-18-2007 at 2:28 pm
When I published Harry Potter, I never expected my friends to bu– what? What are you looking at?
Okay, FINE, that wasn’t me.
But I seriously would expect my friends to read what I’d written.. but only because I know all my friends read the same things as the things I do write. Hell, I bounce ideas off of them!
posted by Nerdfury on 4-18-2007 at 7:04 pm
I wouldn’t expect any of them to purchase it unless they were actually interested in the subject, but one thing I do find rude is to not even attempt to read it when your friend gives you a copy. I had a great deal of support from my friends during the entire research and writing period and wanted to reward that support with personalized copies.
I would not be so arrogant to think all of my friends should go out and pay $20+ for a book they have no interest in.
Besides, a book checked out from the library has also been purchased at some point. I’ve always thought, If I really wanted to reap a large financial windfall from the book I probably should have chosen a differnt subject.
posted by Jeremy on 4-18-2007 at 8:48 pm
A fascinating thread. I’ve written a novel called The Legend Of Aranrhod (you can read what it’s about on Amazon) and I am giving a copy to all my friends – I never knew I had so many – in the hope that they will enjoy it and send out ripples of enthusiasm. I would love people to buy my book (The Legend Of Aranrhod) and so *become* my friends, but those friends I have already are welcome to a freebie. And Kate, I’m sure you know me from somewhere – a parallel universes, perhaps – so you can be happy to buy my book. Aranrhod was the Welsh/Celtic moon goddess, in case you were wondering. Libraries are great.
posted by Geoff Anderson on 4-20-2007 at 8:01 am