Comments on: Strategic Incompetence

By: BamBam

BamBam — Sat, 28 Apr 2007 05:42:45 +0000

Bartending.

I’ve been a bouncer/door guy for years and currently run Security for a venue in Seattle. A while back the Powers That Be decided everyone working in the bar should get their bartender certification.

I made up an entire backstory on the spot: how I tried to tend bar several times in the past and always ended up making patrons ill by accidentally mixing things that didn’t belong together. And how I was so clumsy behind a bar I’d constantly knock bottles over and break ‘em.

Not a bit of it was true,of course. I just knew that if I ever got certified I’d always be in danger of being pressed into service,even when my focus was needed on the door. But since I didn’t go to their little class I’m not ALLOWED to tend bar. Perfect.

By: Karen

Karen — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 19:12:08 +0000

Opening the wine. We have once of those fancy dohickeys with all the levers.

By: marilyn

marilyn — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 18:27:06 +0000

Hey, my Dad was an early pioneer of this!! He is 85 now. His brother was also an expert at it. In the army he got out of peeling potatoes on KP duty by causing his nose to bleed and drip over the potatoes as he peeled them!
They grew up on a dairy farm and guess they both liked to figure out ways to get out of having to work.
Sad but true.

By: Allison

Allison — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 14:31:03 +0000

I am a professional temp.

The right to strategic incompetence is my #1 job perk.

There is also a reciprocity to it, though. I make a good scapegoat for my clients, without either of us absorbing any responsibility or grief, due to my lack of experience and the clients lack of accountability.

I love my job! (Truly though, I am quite good at it)

By: Sarah W

Sarah W — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 00:08:48 +0000

JeannieJolene and everyone who can’t fold laundry- true story- my mom used to make me fold laundry but when i finished she’d refold it thr “right” way. i couldn’t seem to get out of being made to do it though. maybe she was a sadist/masochist. :)

By: Pointy-Hatted Geek

Pointy-Hatted Geek — Fri, 27 Apr 2007 00:03:48 +0000

Load the dishwasher. Seriously.

By: Milica

Milica — Thu, 26 Apr 2007 18:08:06 +0000

Anything requiring use of the poster printer. It’s at least 3 feet long, and it really is intimidating.

By: Kevin

Kevin — Thu, 26 Apr 2007 16:32:51 +0000

I removed the transfer button from my phone at work so that I wouldn’t have to transfer any more calls (which is apparently a task that many people hate).

I also have specifically avoided learning how to tie a tie.

By: Rosie

Rosie — Thu, 26 Apr 2007 15:24:24 +0000

I have a driver’s license, but my mom still insists that I can’t drive. At first this bothered me, but now I realize that I can just get her to drive me anywhere, and in the meantime, I just stare out the window and space out, with no responsibilities as to our safety.

By: Rob

Rob — Thu, 26 Apr 2007 05:12:27 +0000

As my father told me numerous times since I was yo0ung- “the more you CAN do- the more they EXPECT you to do.”

I managed to destroy a lawnmower (put oil in teh gas tank and gas in teh oil tank); chopped my foot with an axe when told to split firewood (real accident- not planned); and wrecked the car when I was told to go pick up my sister at her boyfriend’s house (no more drving sis around!).

These were all honest accidents but they had a great impact on lowering my parents’ expectations. I am happy to say I have met every one of their low expectations since.