mental_floss magazine
SUBSCRIBE >
GIFT SUBSCRIPTIONS >
DIGITAL SUBSCRIPTIONS >
subscriber services >
Becky’s fascinating post on Weird Laws – and the post-post discussion – got me thinking about Weird Sentences. The king of this genre of justice is Mike Cicconetti of Painesville, Ohio. Here are some of his greatest hits, courtesy of Wikipedia and Paul Jacob of Townhall.com:
• A woman who abandoned 35 kittens in a forest was told to spend a night in the woods.
• A man guilty of playing his car stereo too loudly was ordered to sit in the woods, too – so he could “appreciate silence.”
• Two teenagers who scrawled 666 on a nativity figure of Jesus had to lead a donkey through the streets, with a sign saying: “Sorry for the jackass offense.”
• A man caught with a loaded gun was sent to a morgue to see dead bodies.
• Teenagers who flattened tires on school buses were ordered to throw a picnic for primary school children.
• A teenager was ordered to sit blindfolded outside the store from which he’d stolen pornographic videos, holding a sign that said, “See no evil.”
• A man who called a cop a “pig” was forced to stand on a street corner with a pig, wearing a sign that said, “This is not a police officer.”
Know any more examples of creative justice?
Comments (27)
Comment
- Follow mental_floss
Hah! Brilliant!
posted by Jason! on 5-15-2007 at 8:09 am
I don’t know if this is really creative, but a drunk driver who killed three teens was sentenced to sit in jail for 24 hours each year on the date that she killed them…this will go on for the next ten years.
posted by Seth on 5-15-2007 at 8:47 am
I saw a HBO special about a guy who killed a teen while driving drunk. His punishment was that he had to send a dollar to the family every Friday, the day on which he killed their child. Just so he’d remember at least once each week, not that I think he’d forget.
posted by Amber on 5-15-2007 at 9:21 am
The sentence Amber described is pretty awful for the family, no? Every week they get a reminder, too.
posted by justin case on 5-15-2007 at 10:40 am
Although I can’t verify this, a few years back I heard about a judge in Oklahoma who was hearing a divorce/custody case in which he/she ruled that the children (who I think were middle school and high school aged) were to keep posession of the house and the parents shared custody. So the parents had to pack up and move every other week instead of the children. I actually like this ruling in a way. The children get to hang on to a bit of stability.
posted by elizabutt on 5-15-2007 at 10:51 am
I LOVE the one Seth mentioned about the drunk driver, I’d never heard that. I had heard about the one Amber mentioned, I think it’s great.
But then I think there’s a very special spot in hell for drunk drivers, personally.
posted by Jessica on 5-15-2007 at 1:48 pm
Maybe I am wrong, but I thought calling a police officer a PIG was legal. Why wouldn’t this fall under first amendment protection? Are officers a protected group?
posted by Tucker Steele on 5-15-2007 at 1:51 pm
From a USA Today article:
“One California purse snatcher known for his stealth was ordered in 1976 to wear noisy tap shoes in public. A state rather than a federal court reviewed that case and upheld the punishment.”
and
In [another case] case, a federal judge in March 2003 ordered [a defendant] to stand for eight hours outside a San Francisco post office wearing a two-sided “sandwich board” bearing the words: “I stole mail. This is my punishment.”
http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2004-08-17-shame-sentencing_x.htm
posted by mungley on 5-15-2007 at 3:19 pm
you can’t call a cop a pig? is “fascist” still fair game?
posted by ian on 5-15-2007 at 4:55 pm
Drunk Drivers should spend the REST of their lives in jail.. not just one day a year.. for 3 lives.. she should spend 3 lifetimes in jail.
posted by Jowenm on 5-15-2007 at 6:09 pm
I remember reading a short article a long time ago about a town in New Hampshire (I think that’s where it was) started to punish people played their stereo too loudly by sentencing them to listen to polka for an hour.
posted by hippo on 5-15-2007 at 6:37 pm
I live in Ohio, near the city mentioned in the article. And, Yes, this is true. This judge is a JOKE and only does this for some sick form of self publicity. He is a disgrace to the justice system.
posted by Dinker on 5-18-2007 at 6:40 am
i dont know, but holding a poster saying “see no evil” would certainly emabarrass me into not stealing. and i dont see anything wrong with holding a picnic for little kids.
posted by wifi on 5-21-2007 at 6:50 pm
wifi, its because the people dont like school or kids, and like to act all gangster and hard. so it was verry embaressing for them.
posted by JTE on 5-25-2007 at 9:44 am
Am I the only one that expected grammatically odd and humorous phrases, based on the title?
posted by pc on 6-4-2008 at 4:58 am
pc I thought the same thing. Maybe it’s just too early in the a.m…
posted by jcb on 6-4-2008 at 5:30 am
@pc – No, you’re not.
posted by Eileen on 6-4-2008 at 6:50 am
Justin case is right. The family gets a weekly reminder. And only a dollar? That’s just a second slap in the face, IMO.
posted by Li on 6-4-2008 at 6:53 am
I agree with others that the drunk driving cases deserved stricter punishments. Neither are fair sentences.
(PC: I thought that as well.)
posted by Jodi on 6-4-2008 at 8:39 am
The police blotter at my uni had a funny one: a girl stole her friend’s x-box and the punishment was that he had to replace her ipod that he borrowed and lost.
posted by emilybird on 6-4-2008 at 11:20 am
Hey Jason – how about a post on weird sentences!
posted by Katie on 6-4-2008 at 11:48 am
Ian: This may be totally off-topic, but I have a real problem with people who call cops names. These are people who willing put their lives on the line to keep things safe for the rest of us, only to have their every move scrutinized under a microscope. When you’re willing to go after armed 300-pound men strung out on PCP for no more than what they make, then you can call them names.
posted by Joanna on 6-4-2008 at 11:53 am
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present: Judge Ted Poe.
posted by casual_observer on 6-4-2008 at 2:16 pm
Too funny: click on my name to be directed to the article I wanted to post on the board…
posted by casual_observer on 6-4-2008 at 2:18 pm
About the family that gets the dollar reminder each week. Grief counselors must have been involved. It’s probably trivial. The family thinks of their lost one every day. The grief, memories, pictures are constantly there. When my cousin was killed, for several years his parents kept his room exactly as he had left it(a Santana record was on the turntable). Even after many years, my mom still says, “Gary would have been [age] today.” on his birthday.
posted by Tdave on 6-5-2008 at 5:19 am
p.s. I don’t think a dollar a week is enough, either.
The real “slap in the face” to my family is that the cab driver who hit the car my cousin was in, and forced it off of the road, wasn’t convicted of reckless driving, even though there were witnesses. Gary was 18 yrs old.
posted by Tdave on 6-9-2008 at 2:11 am
Joanna, PCP is a depressant not a stimulant, it actually causes the nervous system to shut down, it is only in a select few cases (like those idolized on cops) that we hear of PCP users having super human strength or being ‘crazy’ because of the drug. It is a common myth in our society.
posted by Dave on 8-19-2008 at 6:53 pm