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The death of notable filmmakers this week had me restocking my Netflix, which got me thinking about films I’d never seen, and films I wish I’d never seen. I felt guilty for months about the first R-rated film I ever saw–Firestarter, viewed after vowing silence at a friend’s house, and the imagery wended its way into my dreams for weeks after. Watcher in the Woods and The Shining are perhaps what I’d term the “scariest” movies I’ve seen, but there are some movies just so skewed–either by abject gore or incompetence–that I do wish I’d never seen them. Hostel II is one of them.
I saw this recently, for a reason I can’t completely fish out…I suppose I thought juxtaposing someone else’s perceived terror with my perceived boredom would be illuminating? Who knows, but I did buy the ticket, and I did express horror when a man and his four underage charges sat in front of me, but I sat through the movie, and I’m not happy I did. Even though the whole deus ex machine third act tried to underscore the more symbolic/hyperbolic/absurdist elements of the film, I admit I’ve had some nightmares structured around these images…Some of which, (sorry if this is a spoiler) are featured in a previous post. I doubt I’ll ever have the tolerance of Carol Clover, a Berkeley scholar who has willingly viewed 200 slasher films. In her essay, “Men, Women, and Chainsaws,” she says:
For one critic, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre is “the Gone With the Wind of meat movies.” For another it is a “vile piece of sick crap . . . nothing but a hysterically paced, slapdash, imbecile concoction of cannibalism, voodoo, astrology, sundry hippie-esque cults, and unrelenting sadistic violence as extreme and hideous as a complete lack of imagination can possibly make it.” . . .The Museum of Modern Art bought the film the same year that at least one country, Sweden, banned it.
Cultural relevance aside, are there movies you wish you’d never seen?
Comments (88)
Comment
I saw the original “Amityville Horror” when I was about 11. I had no wanted to go but that is what my mom and sister (aged 26) wanted to see. I’m 40 and there are still aspects of the movie that effect me today. I still will not leave curtains open in a room after dark. There are others as well but this was the first and the worst.
posted by Patrick Barden on 8-3-2007 at 1:25 am
Sin City…especially the part where Bruce Willis won’t stop punching the yellow baddy and bits of gunk are flying everywhere…disgusting! Why do people find that entertaining?
posted by Ari on 8-3-2007 at 2:38 am
I thought “The Sixth Sense” was going to be a psychological thriller. I didn’t realize there would be SPEAKING CORPSES everywhere. I had to sleep with the lights on for two nights while my husband was away on business.
posted by Karen on 8-3-2007 at 5:48 am
Living alone in a loft apartment at the time, the Ring was definitely a mistake. In a new town by myself, my television was my best friend. And for that creepy little girl to crawl out of the TV absolutely ruined me.
posted by Yerg on 8-3-2007 at 6:00 am
Freshmen year of college I entered a phase where I liked gory movies… and by this I mean the likes of Evil Dead, Dead Alive, and Bad taste.
So based on amazon.com’s recommendations I decided to get the movies “Cannibal Ferox” and “Guinea Pig.” Well… Cannibal Ferox was awful, I regret watching and owning it. I had Guinea Pig on for maybe 5 minutes before I questioned my reason for living.
Regardless, Cannibal Ferox is still hidden in my DVD case somewhere and Guinea was traded about a week later to someone for a music CD.
posted by Dan on 8-3-2007 at 6:21 am
There was a Denzel Washington bad horror movie in 1998 called Fallen, definitely didn’t need to see that one.
Even worse was a Robert Downey Jr. Annette Bening nightmare called In Dreams which was a total waste of my time and not necessary for anyone to watch.
Lastly, I have to put up the awful movie From Dusk Till Dawn which was absolutely awful and I can’t believe I didn’t get up and force my companion to leave.
posted by Karen on 8-3-2007 at 6:52 am
i cried when i saw “the exorcist” when i was in high school. after that no scary movie was scary at all, just dumb, until i saw “the ring,” and then i had to sleep with the lights on, too. but then i watched it again and it was a little more silly than scary.
i also get really bad feelings on the inside from “mom and dad save the universe,” “all dogs go to heaven,” and “sword in the stone.” i don’t know why, but i don’t want to think about it.
posted by katie on 8-3-2007 at 7:01 am
I wish I never saw “Dirty Love”, written, directed and starred in by Jenny McCarthy. A whole different type of scary.
posted by brain on 8-3-2007 at 7:17 am
It’s not scary, but I wish I hadn’t seen Pay It Forward. It was a nice concept for a movie, but the foreshadowing of the “tragic” end was so unsubtle that I felt emotionally violated when I cried despite recognizing how I was being manipulated.
posted by Debi on 8-3-2007 at 7:46 am
I saw Prince of Darkness in high school. I didn’t sleep for days. The devil was supposed to live in a liquid in the basement of an old church. I saw it recently on TV, and aside from the fact that I can now recognize Alice Cooper as one of the zombies, I now feel silly. It’s very campy.
In addition, the ads on TV for the movie “Ssssssssss,” about a man whose skin turns to snake skin (complete with shedding) used to freak me out as a kid. Never actually saw the movie, though (my mom would never let me watch, and I’m not as inclined to watch these days).
posted by kcz on 8-3-2007 at 8:00 am
I strongly dislike movies that are permeated with the writer’s/director’s world view that everything is rotten and vile. In this vein, “Se7en” ranks as one of my least favorites and one I strongly regret seeing. (In the non-scary category: I also regretted renting “Dudley Doo-Right”, but because it was stupid, boring, and an insult to the source material.)
posted by Karl on 8-3-2007 at 8:03 am
Katie: I can completely relate to an evening spent in tears due to Linda Blair’s antics, as well as unspeakable ‘icky feeling’ that is associated with certain, seemingly benign childhood movies. “Legend” does it to me, as do “Fraggle Rock” cartoons. Really wish I knew why!
As far as trying to wish away a past horror movie experience goes, I’d like to take back my 2 hours watching “House of 1,000 Corpses”. Uselessly gross.
posted by Sarah on 8-3-2007 at 8:07 am
I regret seeing “Sleepy Hollow.” It was needlessly gory and the moral of the story was that religion is stupid unless it is witchcraft.
posted by Scott on 8-3-2007 at 8:26 am
“I Spit On Your Grave.” My girlfriend and I expected a horror movie about revenge. Instead, we got an hour or so of snuff film showing a woman being raped in the woods. Although that does make you appreciate when she performs a little bathtub operation on the guy later.
posted by David on 8-3-2007 at 8:47 am
My parents took me to see Gremlins in the theater when I was 5…needless to say, I spent many a night afterward curled up at the foot of their bed. As an adult, for some reason Signs left me pretty freaked, as did the Ring. Vanilla Sky was awful too, but for different reasons - as far as I’m concerned, Tom Cruise owes me $4 for the rental.
posted by slandurgurl on 8-3-2007 at 8:49 am
Debi I completely agree with you. I hate it when movies so something just to make you cry.
I saw Se7en on the recommendation of a friend about a year ago and I still get these really awful nightmares. In the nightmare I’ve been kidnapped by a serial killer and instead of killing me like everyone else he’s decided to keep me a servant. I have to do whatever he wants, he still tortures me, and I have to watch while tortures other victims. Needless to say, I HATE that movie.
posted by Sally on 8-3-2007 at 8:56 am
Ôdishon (Audition) is probably the most disturbing movie I’ve seen. If you didn’t know it, the first 45 minutes were the same as a really bad romance movie… then in a sequence about 5 seconds long, the whole theme of the movie changes.
Growing up I think The Nightmare on Elm Street flicks were the worst. Sure a monster in the closet is scary in some movies, or a mysterious lagoon, but ultimately after watching a scary movie most people go to sleep. Unfortunately being that the whole premise of the movie was that Freddy can only get you in your sleep it makes it difficult and I give the creators props for thinking of that.
posted by Chris on 8-3-2007 at 9:01 am
I’m a huge Gael García Bernal fan, so I bought Amores Perros when it was on sale at the local video store without having had seen it first. It’s gotten really good reviews, and I’m sure it’s a good movie, but I never got past the first, like, 30 minutes. After the particularly graphic dog fighting scene, I had to flip to the credits to find where it says that no animals were harmed in making the movie. Even then, I couldn’t finish it, I had to give the movie to a friend.
I also wish I had never seen Eyes Wide Shut. Now, whenever I think of Stanley Kubrick–some of his movies are among my favorites–I first think of that ridiculous film.
posted by Cynthia on 8-3-2007 at 9:17 am
Unbreakable. I remember watching that in a hotel, late at night, while my family was visiting Ireland. It’s just so needlessly disturbing…
posted by Laura on 8-3-2007 at 9:29 am
mulholland drive. what a pretentious piece of crap.
posted by jenni on 8-3-2007 at 9:43 am
Oh yeah, Eyes Wide Shut - what a total waste of time! I hated that movie…
My company took us to see Tank Girl and I hated it so bad, but we weren’t allowed to leave, since we were on ‘company time’…wow…held hostage at the movies…it was really bad…
posted by donner on 8-3-2007 at 9:49 am
I would agree with Jenni and say that I wish I had the two hours of my life back from Mulholland Drive.
My wife says Chuck and Larry was the worst movie she sat through.
For horror, I would have to say Arachnophobia. Only movie I almost walked out on. when John Goodman pulls that spider web string and the spider flies into his face I jumped out of my seat. Still gives me the heebie jeebies.
I can still freak out my former roommate by whistling “Time is on my side” from Fallen. She still yells at me to stop and we saw that movie 9-10 years ago.
posted by Dusty on 8-3-2007 at 9:52 am
The movie “The Hotel New Hampshire” is quite possibly the worst movie I’ve ever seen. It is the only movie that I paid a ticket for that was so bad i could not sit through and actually got up and walked out.
posted by Ken Bacon on 8-3-2007 at 10:06 am
When I was about 5 my sister made me watch a Dracula film in which they showed someone getting staked. The stake piercing white fabric and the bright red blood spurting out haunted my nightmares for years. I think it was Horror of Dracula, but 30 years down the line I won’t watch that film to find out for sure .
As for bad movies, Star Trek V, Ferngully: the Last Rain Forest, and Leaving Las Vegas are the only three I was sorely tempted to walk out of.
posted by Camille on 8-3-2007 at 10:11 am
Anaconda
The Blair Witch Project
Eyes Wide Shut
Every movie with Jean Claude Van Damme in it
Ultraviolet
Electra
The list of mind-numbingly bad movies I wish I had never seen is so long. I don’t feel so bad about some of them (the ones I didn’t pay to see), but there have been a few that I should have demanded compensation for having watched.
posted by Ssquach on 8-3-2007 at 10:20 am
Oh, where to begin? I don’t regret watching any movies because they’re too scary, only ones that hurt my brain for being too stupid or awful:
Employee of the month
Superman IV
An American Werewolf in Paris
Dead Alive
Repossessed
2001: A Space Travesty
Sweet Home Alabama
House of 1000 Corpses
The Mangler
Meet the Fockers
… and that’s just off the top of my head.
posted by mikelietz on 8-3-2007 at 10:25 am
As a very small child I had a real life experence with an awful tornado outbreak, I believe I was traumatized. (Wouldn’t you be if you spent 6 hours in a cold, dark, cramped, wet, crouded storm cellar?) So when my dad got Twister for me and my friend (who liked scary movies) to watch when we were 8, I knew I’d be freaked out. Halfway through the movie I, being the meteorology freak that I am, was laughing my head off and my friend was hiding under a pillow. I still refuse to watch it becaouse of the unbearable meteorologiacal inaccuracies.
posted by Emilee on 8-3-2007 at 10:27 am
Mind you, I said meteorology freak, not spelling freak. No insults needed, I can insult myself. The scariest movie I’ve ever seen is the original Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory…I have an Oompa Loompa phobia…
posted by Emilee on 8-3-2007 at 10:31 am
I too was held hostage for a mandatory viewing of American Pie. Most people I know enjoyed this film, but I found it gratuitously excessive and offensive. I wish I could have those hours back. I spent much of the time watching cheese melt on our bagels in the toaster oven rather than sift the film’s subject matter through my brain.
posted by Caleb on 8-3-2007 at 10:35 am
I will forever wish I had walked out of Natural Born Killers. My date and I kept telling each other it was bound to get better. But no.
Apparently, the rest of the people in the audience decided it was a waste of time. The theater was 3/4 full when we sat down, but there were only 4 other people left by the time it was over.
posted by Anita on 8-3-2007 at 10:35 am
I sat through all of “League of Extraordinary Gentlemen” a couple of weeks ago. I have felt guilty about it ever since. That was the most ignorant film I have ever seen.
When I went to see Hostel, I am actually proud I was smart enough to walk out.
posted by Dillon Quarles on 8-3-2007 at 10:37 am
i’m with jenni on mulholland drive. i spent the whole time waiting for a nude scene. that just how bad the film was
posted by David on 8-3-2007 at 10:45 am
i’m with jenni on mulholland drive. i spent the whole time waiting for a nude scene. that just how bad the film was
posted by David on 8-3-2007 at 10:46 am
Stuck in bed with the flu, I unfortunately watched a large portion of “Event Horizon” on TNT. I didn’t even realize it had affected me until I started having recurrent nightmares about one particular scene where these guys are clawing their own eyes out. But the movie was so unbelieveably stupid that I was too embarrassed to admit to my husband that it had freaked me out. Sad.
posted by natlynn on 8-3-2007 at 11:08 am
About the only one that comes to mind is the Blair Witch Project. The concept sounded interesting, so I went with a friend. We just barely managed to stay through the entire movie and we spent most of it waiting for enough light to come back on the screen so that we could leave and debating whether or not it was going to get better. It didn’t.
posted by Tru on 8-3-2007 at 11:13 am
I wish I hadn’t seen the new Hairspray. Fortunately, I got paid to go see and review it for a paper I write for. It was ultra-disappointing because the music and dancing are actually a lot of fun. Unfortunately the rest of it is so dumb that it felt like it was made for a child, a very dumb child. However, what really made me sick that I was watching it was John Travolta. I have never wanted to walk out of a movie, even a bad movie, but Travolta is so bad in Hairspray, I considered walking out every time he came on screen. The only reason I didn’t: I am pretty sure it is the worst screen performance of all time. It’s like a right of passage, like watching Plan 9 From Outer Space. It may be awful, but it is so awful, that it has to be watched.
posted by Scott on 8-3-2007 at 11:23 am
“Crash” by David Cronenberg.
Only movie I ever walked out on. Made me sick.
People getting off having sex during car crashes. BLECH!!!
posted by Sheldon Siegel on 8-3-2007 at 11:38 am
Godsend.
Not only did it give me nightmares, but it was also one of the stupidest movies I’ve ever seen.
There’s 1 hour and 42 minutes of my life that I’m never getting back.
(I checked Rotten Tomatoes just now, like I do, and it’s 3% fresh. That’s pretty bad.)
posted by Michelle on 8-3-2007 at 12:04 pm
the ring. oh god, everytime a phone rang, i’d jump out of my skin. i’m so happy to see that there are folks with the ring on their lists, too!
posted by weeble warble on 8-3-2007 at 12:21 pm
“Striptease” frightened me with the very thought that it ever saw the greenlight.
On serious fright, I saw a version of the “Turn of the Screw” once that has made me wary of children ever since.
posted by Allison on 8-3-2007 at 12:22 pm
I will never forgive my husband for picking out “Orgasmo” (from the makers of South Park). It is one of those films that we use now as the standard of badness - a badness we have thankfully not surpassed. Although we probably dodged it turning off Ultraviolet 15 minutes in.
Our other standard for lameness (in a different way) is “Kicking and Screaming” and “Walking and Talking” (interchangeably) for pretentious preachy poorly executed independent films - and boring to boot. Please don’t show me your point of view - beat me over the head with it repeatedly by having your characters just tell it to me directly!
posted by kimberly on 8-3-2007 at 12:25 pm
“Pay It Forward” and “Crash” top my list. Pretentious, too coincidental, & adamant about rubbing our noses into common universal themes of good vs. evil. Helent Hunt is the worst alcoholic i’ve ever seen portrayed on screen. I also thought “Pi” was art house crap.
posted by emily on 8-3-2007 at 12:29 pm
Poltergeist gave me nightmares for two solid months (I was what, 8 or so? ) and even ruined ET for me — I was still really jumpy when I saw that!
Eyes Wide Shut ruined every other Kubrick movie for me too. I used to love his work, and I dragged a bunch of friends to see that one. They have not forgiven me.
The biggest waste for me was getting cable (including HBO, Showtime, Cinemax) in the 80s. I think I sat through the same dozen cheesy movies a few thousand times. Arthur, Modern Problems, Fletch, Ghostbusters, Beverly Hills Cop — just a few that were better the first hundred times.
posted by John on 8-3-2007 at 12:29 pm
I love bad movies. I just know when they are going to be bad, don’t pay the full ticket price (or rent them), and lower my expectations. There is only one movie, though, that I wish I had never seen:
Very Bad Things
It was a wretched piece of filth. I actually wrote a letter to the director. I like dark humor as much as the next guy, but Very Bad Things wasn’t dark humor. It was just bad.
posted by Adam on 8-3-2007 at 12:30 pm
If we’re just talking bad movies (not necessarily SCARY movies) - how about anything that Ben Stiller has ever been in?? After watching Meet the Parents my decision was final: I will never watch another Ben Stiller movie again.
posted by BioBri on 8-3-2007 at 12:34 pm
Anita reminded me of Natural Born Killers. While I actually kind of liked the movie, don’t know what that says about me, I do distinctly remember after the movie that everyone had that thousand yard stare. It was like we had all just witnessed a public hanging.
As for the worst movie ever made, hands down it is Manos, Hands of Fate. The absolutely most painful movie I have ever watched. This was even the MST3K version. Even the humor couldn’t distract from the fact that it was a stinking pile of pooh.
posted by Dusty on 8-3-2007 at 12:41 pm
Taste is a funny thing. I like some of the movies mentioned to be a violation of taste….
However, right on Dillon Q on American Pie! I was 18 when it came out and my friends LOVED it…I couldn’t convince them otherwise, and I tried. A lot.
The movie I’ve always despised that everyone seems to argue for, though I don’t know why: “Being John Malkovich.”
posted by Beth on 8-3-2007 at 12:44 pm
The worst movie I EVER saw was something called “When Dreams May Come”. I don’t even think it is on DVD.
Horrible premise that you watch how a whole family dies one-by-one(Mom, Dad, kids..even nanny)and happily meet each other in Heaven. I don’t know why Robin Williams
agreed to do this piece of crap. Heaven look like something out of those cheesy Thomas Kincade paintings. I am now TRUELY afraid to die and get stuck in Tackyville!
posted by Ronnie on 8-3-2007 at 12:47 pm
While it was far too amateurish of a production to scare me, I definitely regret purchasing and ever viewing “Sleepaway Camp”. The ending is supposed to be shocking AND funny, but it just aggravated me even more. So much so that I destroyed the VHS tape after ejecting it from the VCR.
I agree with Chris, “Audition” is one of the most disturbing films I’ve ever viewed, but I think it’s a great film also.
posted by Jordan on 8-3-2007 at 12:50 pm
I have never walked out on a movie (or stopped the DVD), no matter how badly I knew that I would regret it. When the Phantom Menace spat on everything I held dear about the Star Wars films, I watched until the end. When Star Trek V did the same to the Star Trek films (the even numbered ones anyway) I watched until the end. When Superman III made a mockery out of both the Man of Steel and Richard Pryor, I watched until the end. There was one movie, however, that I desperately wanted to walk out on, but couldn’t because I was with friends, who for some reason beyond me, actually liked it. That movie was Ghostrider. There was not one single aspect of that poor excuse for a movie, that wasn’t mind-bogglingly terrible. I am an atheist, yet after only five minutes of the movie I was disregarding my closely held disbeliefs, and praying to God that she would kill the projectionist or something so that I wouldn’t have to sit through another second of that piece of crap.
As for movies that I wish I’d never seen because they scare me, there’s only one in that category: My Girl. I have seen many of the previously mentioned movies such as The Ring, Se7en, The Shining, The Sixth Sense, Signs, and so on, but none of them scared me at all. The one movie that frightens me to my very core is My Girl, a movie about childhood romance. The reason (spoilers ahead) is because I saw it when I was four years old, and was afraid of bees. At the end of the movie the boy is trying to retrieve a ring for the girl and is killed by bees, in a scene that haunts me to this very day. And I still fear bees despite the fact that I have been stung before and didn’t even really hurt.
posted by Matt on 8-3-2007 at 12:51 pm
Two movies:
1) Winter Solstice. Because, unlike Seinfeld, things that are about nothing are infact nothing… and it just about bored me to tears.
2) The Blair Witch Project, not necessarily because of anything other than my wife sleeping on TOP OF ME for a good week… in the summer… with no air-conditioning.
posted by Dave on 8-3-2007 at 1:01 pm
Oh, ugh, thanks for reminding me of “What Things May Come”. Great. That, and “Somewhere in Time”.
But I really, really wish someone could erase Se7en from my head. The plot sort of appealed to me, that the crimes were based on the seven deadly sins, but it was just vile.
My only saving grace was having seen the “All William Shatner” version of the climactic end scene BEFORE I saw the actual movie.
posted by helenel on 8-3-2007 at 1:43 pm
I’m with Anita — Natural Born Killers was awful. I’m just glad I saw Pulp Fiction before I saw this one. If it had been the other way around, I think I probably would have skipped Pulp Fiction.
Some other awful ones:
Satisfaction (this one was so bad that the y used a different title when they released it to video)
Julia and Julia
Sideways
Omega Man
Shy People
Dumb and Dumber
Highlander II
…and, really, the list goes on and on.
posted by Jeff on 8-3-2007 at 1:47 pm
I have to say that I was scarred for life not by the horror movie, Suspiria, but by the trailer for said movie. All I had to do was hear the creepy, nursery rhyme-like music coming from the TV, and I would run for cover.
Just this past year, I finally found a copy of this movie on DVD. I had watched this movie before and I really enjoyed it, so I was happy to watch it again. What I didn’t realize was that one of the extras on the DVD was the original TV trailer. Well, I’m ashamed to say that I agonized over actually watching the trailer again after all these years (the movie was made in 1977)and when I finally got up the nerve to do it, it still scared the living daylights out of me. I found out childhood traumas have an indefinite shelf life.
posted by Art F on 8-3-2007 at 1:48 pm
Pokemon 2000 was the worst movie ever made. It made the Pokemon TV show look like a Felini film. I was there with my 6 year old son, I wanted to stab my self in my eyes to ease the pain (anyone remember Michael O’Donohue on SNL and in National Lampoon). The kids movie Madagascar was also stupid. I agree with Jenni, Mullholland Drive was pretty senseless. But Magnolia was much worse. My wife pulled out a book in the theater at The Last of the Mohicans.
posted by Stew on 8-3-2007 at 1:53 pm
No one has yet mentioned the two worst films ever…
Autumn in New York
and
16mm
posted by John on 8-3-2007 at 1:55 pm
just the stupidest movie ever, but not scary: anaconda. ugh, give me my two hours back, jlo
posted by AC on 8-3-2007 at 4:15 pm
Queen Of The Damned…. free screening and I still want my time back.
posted by Jaime on 8-3-2007 at 7:31 pm
Yup; Blair Witch Project has to be the worst. I think it was supposed to be scary, but it was just dumb.
Another stinker is Biker Boyz. My son bought that one for me as a gift. Not only did I have to sit through the whole thing, but now it’s got a semi-permanent home on the shelf in the family room, and he pulls it out way too often. I’m predicting that that disk may have a debilitating accident sometime soon. Very soon.
One that I remember being sorry I was watching at the time, but is now one of my faves is Aliens. Saw it in the theater, and parts were ready to scare me out of my skin.
posted by Dave on 8-3-2007 at 7:53 pm
The Britney Spears movie, enough said
posted by Agustina on 8-3-2007 at 9:17 pm
I don’t know what mine is called. It was a Japanese movie, involving things… very disturbing things. Things I’m not going to mention here. But occasionally I remember it, and wish it was blotted from my mind.
posted by Schneh on 8-3-2007 at 10:53 pm
The Kovak Box. Made no sense, i want those hours of my life back so i can spend them scrubbing the memory of that stupid movie out of my brain
posted by Ben on 8-3-2007 at 11:17 pm
Pet Semetary.
posted by Lynne on 8-3-2007 at 11:47 pm
“Birth” was the first movie I’ve ever wanted to walk out on. It was ridiculous and slow and boring. I will never forgive Nicole Kidman for it.
posted by Nikole on 8-3-2007 at 11:57 pm
Adam - I am in total agreement! VERY BAD THINGS=VERY BAD MOVIE
posted by JaneM on 8-4-2007 at 12:26 am
Feed. Wow, just wow. Not only was it bad (in the technical sense) but it disturbed me for weeks afterwards. It made me so creeped out by my few extra pounds in a way that wasn’t healthy.
Heed this warning fellow Flosser’s.
posted by LuluJ on 8-4-2007 at 12:33 am
‘House on Haunted Hill’ gives me the willies even after not watching if for years.
The horror sequences were just so FREAKY that I couldn’t even finish it. I turned it off when the Vincent Price-like character was going insane and haven’t watched it since.
posted by heather on 8-4-2007 at 1:24 am
I am a big big fan of all things horror and scary ,but one the scariest films(and the book is too!!) is the original film of the Haunting made in the 60s/70s. Its not what you see, its what you imagine. If I watch it , i sleep with the lights on. very very atomospheric & scary
posted by diane on 8-4-2007 at 9:09 am
Very Bad Things — Worst. Movie. Ever. To bill it as “dark comedy” was inaccurate and misleading. It was just disturbing and horrifying.
On a lighter note, the original Willie Wonka kind of freaked me out. Seeing that girl turn into a giant blueberry was sort of upsetting when I was 4.
posted by jana on 8-4-2007 at 10:25 am
Wild at Heart springs to mind for bad, but thankfully I’ve missed many of the ones listed here.
posted by Don on 8-4-2007 at 2:11 pm
I don’t like horror as a genre, so most of the films mentioned by other posters wouldn’t attract me enough to watch them in the first place. One such film that I have seen, and wished I hadn’t, is a Hammer “classic”, “Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires”. This is a seriously confused movie: part old school Hammer horror (Dracula and all), part I-wish-I-was-a-Hong-Kong-Kung-Fu-movie, large part utter nonsense — mostly the latter. It really makes no sense whatsoever, and the only fun one can have from watching it is the old game of “spot the next victim”. Maybe it would be more understandable if I watched it while drunk, but who wants to bother making the effort?
The other film that sticks in my memory as something that I wish I hadn’t seen was “Song of Norway”, a truly dire biopic of a Norwegian composer (Greig?) whose name my memory has mostly obliterated in self-defence. I’m not sure if the writers thought they were trying to do a Nordic version of “The Sound of Music” or what, but it was monumentally boring (so they failed if that was what they were attempting) and pretty darn confused. It could have done with one of the Seven Golden Vampires to liven it up, or at least give it some plot.
posted by Phil on 8-4-2007 at 2:52 pm
The Ring totally freaked me out. Seriously. I was actually counting the days. I kept imagining Samara would be standing there face to face with me when I opened my eyes in the shower.Complete with “Gotcha!” orchestra stab.
That week sucked.
Visitor Q is quite possibly the most disturbing film I have actually sat all the way through. Rape, incest, necrophilia, coprophilia. And those are the ‘funny’ parts. Avoid. You will thank me.
Begotten is the most disturbing film of all time, though. So I am told. I have not actually watched my copy, but a friend I loaned it to was actually angry that he watched it and was not warned about it’s content. So consider yourself warned.
I also remember the Suspiria (but it could have been some other film) tv commercial- if I recall corectly it was a woman brushing her hair while that creepy nursery rhyme music box played. Then she turns around and has a skull for a face.
The tv commercials for Silent Scream and Prophecy: The Monster Movie also freaked me out at the time. The Prophecy: The Monster Movie commmercial ruined summer camp for me.
There was another 70’s tv commersial that freaked me out as well- still don’t know what the movie was- involved some millionaire who died and left things to his family, which killed them. His wife got a shower whose walls closed in and killed her. The son got a shirt (or tie) that choked him. The tv commmercial intercut between these images and a leering portrait of the millionaire. Freaky.
Hostel was just gory, although I always thought a great film would be a spin off all about the guy with the metal apron towards the end of the film whose job was to cut up the bodies so they would fit in the incinerator (or whatever). What is his home life like? How did he get that job? What does he do for fun?
posted by Ted on 8-5-2007 at 10:42 am
Any movie with Richard Benjamin.
posted by Rich on 8-5-2007 at 1:33 pm
Will someone please explain the fascination with “Donnie Darko”? That and “Napolean Dynamite” (which even the people who liked it said that the only part worth watching was the last 15 minutes; then why make the first 1:45?). Also please add 90% of all French movies. They take 2 hours to convey under 15 minutes of plot. I know as an American we expect lots of entertainment, but I expect to be gain something for my time…
posted by Maria on 8-5-2007 at 3:56 pm
I saw “An American Werewolf in London” when I was 11 - wait, let me put that into context, I saw the first 15 minutes of it before my mom picked me up (you know right up to when the guy gets mauled). Needless to say I did not see how it ended, so of course I knew lying in bed that night the werewolf was coming through my window at any moment. It was a solid month of sleeping on the floor in my parents room.
posted by covenofovens on 8-5-2007 at 10:37 pm
I haven’t been watching movies lately, and the last time I went to a theater was november 1998 when I saw “John Carpenters, Vampires”.
I thought “Enemy Of The State” was so stupid that I refer to it as “Enema Of The State.” I hope Gene Hackman is embarrassed.
posted by Tdave on 8-6-2007 at 3:34 am
The only movie I’ve walked out of was Fantastic Four - I still don’t know how my friend convinced me to see it in the theater. I only wish I had gone to the box office and gotten a refund.
The other movie I wanted to walk out of but didn’t was Pirates of the Caribbean. I know it’s supposed to be this universally loved film but I think it was completely impossible to enjoy. I didn’t walk out only because my ride was watching the movie and I didn’t want to be a jerk about it.
posted by Sass on 8-6-2007 at 4:19 pm
The Sixth Sense ruined me for quite some time. The night I saw the movie really got me. I woke in the middle of the night having to use the bathroom, but I refused to leave the bed. I was afraid I was going to see the housewife who slashed her wrists. I was 25 at the time.
For a while after seeing the movie, I couldn’t watch horror films.
posted by hifidigitalboy on 8-6-2007 at 5:26 pm
As for movies that I shouldn’t have seen and should have walked out on: Fast Food Nation.
The worst part was that I saw it in France, so there were no English subtitles for the Spanish-speaking scenes. Regardless, it was a pile of poo. The first time I’ve ever fallen asleep in the theatre.
posted by hifidigitalboy on 8-6-2007 at 5:32 pm
There are lots of films that were so awful I wished I had done something else with my time, but there are three really well-made movies that stayed with me in an unpleasant way for a disconcertingly long time: Testament, The River’s Edge, and Bastard out of Carolina. All three contained themes and imagery that would periodically pop into my head and depress the heck out of me for weeks if not months afterward.
posted by Mark B on 8-7-2007 at 8:34 am
Natural Born Killers was an Excellent movie. It was the very essence of Nietchze’s uber-mensch. The best part about the whole thing was that there wasn’t a single redeeming quality in ANY of the characters in that movie, except for (when it got down to it) Mickey and Mallory. (They were at least honest about who and what they were…)
Oh, except for the shaman. He was decent. And they struggled with his death because of that.
That said, “Eye of the Beholder” (with Ashley Judd) was the biggest waste of time every. I want my 1:49 hours back…
posted by Ed Hands on 8-7-2007 at 8:54 am
Without a doubt, the worst movie of all time has to be “Gangs of New York”! Bad plot, bad story, even worse acting! Daniel Day Lewis and Leo should be ashamed and embarrassed to have taken part in such a crappy movie! Ugh!
posted by Kriti on 8-7-2007 at 4:34 pm
Since my mother was such a Huge (with a capital H) Star Wars fan, i took her to see Star Wars III Revenge of the Sith on opening night…at the ending (which was laughably bad) she was so disappointed that she looked as if she were going to cry.
not only do i wish i’d never seen that movie, but i wish that it never existed.
also, Bewitched (feat. Will Ferrell) is quite possibly just as bad as Mano: Hands of Fate…
posted by mikey on 8-8-2007 at 10:39 am
also, Irreversible is the most disturbing movie i’ve ever seen…and i’ve seen alot of so-called “disturbing” movies…
i won’t go into details…just trust me on this one.
posted by mikey on 8-8-2007 at 10:43 am
ANY movie with Parker Posey would be on my list. She’s like the kiss of death for me with movies. I won’t rent or go see a movie if I know she’s going to be in it.
For the record, the Robin Williams movie discussed above is ‘What Dreams May Come’. My wife would totally have that movie on her worst of list (including ‘Millenium Man’ and maybe ‘Patch Adams’ if we’re talking Robin Williams slash your wrists weepfests). I actually kind of liked the movie and didn’t, ultimately, find it sad. Go figure.
The only movie I ever walked out on at a movie theater was ‘Four Weddings and a Funeral’. I don’t know if it was because I was 16 at the time (my parents dragged me to it) but I was so bored that I finally decided that I’d rather watch people play games in the arcade for an hour.
posted by This Is Fun on 8-8-2007 at 4:17 pm
Hostel 2… I wanted to turn it off, but the guys I was watching it wanted to see if it would get better. It really, really didn’t. I felt physically ill after watching it. 2 hours of my life back pls.
And those childhood movies that scar you? Whilst my mum went to answer the phone, my older sister and I ended up watching the movie Four Rooms. I probably would’ve been around 8 years old. If anything scarred me for life, that would be it. What an insane movie :\
posted by g. on 8-26-2007 at 3:15 am
My would say that Cabin Boy is the worst movie I’ve ever sat through. After watching it, my husband and I decided to tell my sister & her husband that it was the best movie ever. So they rented it & sat through the whole thing, thinking, “It’s GOT to get better!” They were afraid to bring it up afterwards, still thinking that we liked it. They got us back, though; by telling us what a great movie Mars Attacks was.
posted by SMC on 8-28-2007 at 4:19 pm
Well, Arachnophobia FREAKED me out when I was a kid (a friend showed it at her 8th birthday party, a slumber party no less). And all 3 Alien movies are just too gross for me to handle. (I tend to get images “stuck” in my head, which can be good and bad) Anyway, the absolute WORST movie EVER, is Little Mermaid 2. I really don’t feel one way or the other about the first one, but the second one is just ridiculously bad. My roommate and I rate all bad movies on the LM2 standard. (we live in China, so we can buy movies for 75 cents apiece, so we wind up buying a lot of weird movies just to see them)
posted by greenstrawberries on 9-10-2007 at 6:26 am