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by - August 16, 2007 - 8:15 AM
UPDATE!: Thanks to everyone who entered our “Name our New Award and win lots of stuff!” contest. The Contest is officially closed now, and we’ll be reviewing entires for the next two days. Be sure to check back on Tuesday, when we’ll announce the winners.
**********************************************
The November Issue of mental_floss is our very first Awards Issue, where we’re paying tribute to all sorts of ridiculousness (Best Reason to Spend $5000 on Underpants, Best Rumor that Turned out to Be True, Most Controversial Piece of Yard Art, etc). The only problem is, we don’t have a name for our super coveted Award yet. We’ve thought about calling it “The Flossies” or “The Mentals” but we’d love something even clever-er… Send in your original ideas in the comments below, and our favorites will win a mental_floss prize pack (and the 2 runners-up will get t-shirts). What are you waiting for? Help us out already!
Comments (365)
Comment
- Follow mental_floss
Mr. Flossies? (assuming the anatomy is the same as in the pic)
The Golden Statue Awards
posted by eric on 8-16-2007 at 8:20 am
The fleurons meaning flossed neurons?
posted by Vorpal on 8-16-2007 at 8:35 am
The boobie award could be the new rosies.
posted by Vorpal on 8-16-2007 at 8:37 am
How about the Floscars?
posted by Rosalie on 8-16-2007 at 8:38 am
It should be some sort of Plaque.
posted by mikelietz on 8-16-2007 at 8:38 am
How about the Random awards? To celebrate the glorious absurdity that is life.
posted by Kia on 8-16-2007 at 8:43 am
Medal_semigloss
posted by GoingLikeSixty on 8-16-2007 at 8:50 am
I like “The Mentos” but something tells me there might be copyright laws…
posted by Jill on 8-16-2007 at 8:51 am
Order of the Palm
posted by GoingLikeSixty on 8-16-2007 at 8:52 am
Transcontinental Sentimental Rental Medal
posted by GoingLikeSixty on 8-16-2007 at 8:55 am
Inanies or zananies or zanies?
enigmies?
trulies? (as in true lies)
preposters
gofigurines
statue of limitations
boondogs
whammies
posted by Tom on 8-16-2007 at 8:57 am
Am I on a deadline?
posted by GoingLikeSixty on 8-16-2007 at 8:57 am
The Flossie (or Flossy)
“The Flossies” would be the plural or the award ceremony.
posted by Bob on 8-16-2007 at 8:59 am
Millies… as in “The Mill on the Floss”
posted by Louis on 8-16-2007 at 9:00 am
How about….
The Smart-as-a-whips
or
The Cageys
1. cagey, cagy, canny, clever — (showing self-interest and shrewdness in dealing with others; “a cagey lawyer”; “too clever to be sound”)
posted by Phunk on 8-16-2007 at 9:01 am
How about The Pundits?
posted by Charlotte on 8-16-2007 at 9:03 am
The Mental Stimudents. That might run into copyright laws as well…
Pre-frontal Cortexes
Flobotomies
Mental Hygeine Awards
posted by Dusty on 8-16-2007 at 9:05 am
Trivia Ted.
posted by Elizabeth on 8-16-2007 at 9:06 am
oh, Mental hygiene, good one.
@_aboy
posted by GoingLikeSixty on 8-16-2007 at 9:08 am
How about the Anecdota? And the Dota for short?
posted by Charlyn on 8-16-2007 at 9:08 am
Synapitcals
Randomies
Enlightenmentals
The Long Tail Awards
The Erratics
The Academician Awards
Intellectualies
Cleveries
Hapharzards
Offhands
The Willy-Nillies
The Purple Brain(s)
The Cyan Star(s)
The Pearson-Hattikudur Prize
posted by Kevo on 8-16-2007 at 9:11 am
How about the “M-F-ers?”
:-)
posted by Eric Luper on 8-16-2007 at 9:11 am
haha, i like Mental Hygiene, too
or
The Fluorides
The Golden Grillz
posted by sd on 8-16-2007 at 9:15 am
haha, i like Mental Hygiene, too
or
The Fluorides
The Golden Grillz
posted by sd on 8-16-2007 at 9:16 am
How about “The SCA”? The super coveted award?
posted by Betsy on 8-16-2007 at 9:21 am
The Smarty McBrilliant Awards
posted by Jen on 8-16-2007 at 9:27 am
Here’s Mine:
Mental Floss
The Stringies (floss, string, etc)
The Cortex Awards
The Squeaks (after flossing, it squeaks)
The FlossHeads
posted by Rabbit on 8-16-2007 at 9:30 am
Golden Cranium
brain brush
flosstastic
brain polish
metallic brain of splendor
posted by EV on 8-16-2007 at 9:34 am
Keep Your Mind Outta the Gutter Awards
Brainwashed Awards?
i don’t know
posted by Simon on 8-16-2007 at 9:34 am
How about the “Alberts” or the “Einies” in honor of your unofficial mascot, Mr. Albert Einstein?
Dean
Alexandria, VA
posted by Dean on 8-16-2007 at 9:35 am
The Alberts
The Nerdies
The Dorkos
posted by Molly on 8-16-2007 at 9:35 am
The Crossroad Awards?
The Three Road Awards?
The Order of the Three Roads?
or the Minties.
posted by Amanda on 8-16-2007 at 9:36 am
The Einstein Award(s), lovingly referred to as the Albie(s).
posted by TrilliBean on 8-16-2007 at 9:36 am
The Noetic Nonsense Awards.
Noetic means “mental”.
posted by Fernando on 8-16-2007 at 9:40 am
The Molar Awards
or maybe something about tartar
posted by Frank314 on 8-16-2007 at 9:41 am
The Poindexters
posted by David on 8-16-2007 at 9:45 am
The Wierd-o’s
Mr. Smarty Pants
posted by Marie on 8-16-2007 at 9:46 am
obscurities awards
posted by Darcy on 8-16-2007 at 9:48 am
The Mental Plaque Award
posted by Fernando on 8-16-2007 at 9:50 am
How about the Kenny? It could be a golden statue of Ken Jennings.
Einstien seems like the best sourse of information, since it is our mascot.
How about a statue of Einstien stick out his touge like the famouse picture?
Maybe the Smarty Pants award?
If we all put our heads together, I’m sure we’ll think of something really awesome and cleaver.
posted by Colin on 8-16-2007 at 9:54 am
How about the Brainiac? That is, of course, assuming no copyright infringement with DC.
posted by Chris Golden on 8-16-2007 at 10:00 am
the cum laude-ies.
posted by deb on 8-16-2007 at 10:06 am
The Messies
posted by Melanie on 8-16-2007 at 10:08 am
The Hygienes. And recipients become Mental Hygienists.
posted by Cathy on 8-16-2007 at 10:36 am
The Spunkies.
posted by D.Christian on 8-16-2007 at 10:36 am
Winner of “The Gold Mental”!
posted by Joanie on 8-16-2007 at 10:39 am
Hmmm…..
how about calling it “The Brainiac”??
posted by Joel on 8-16-2007 at 10:41 am
I would have said the Albies but TrilliBean beat me to it! Good one.
My alternate is the Genies (as in genius)
posted by JaneM on 8-16-2007 at 10:43 am
Put me down for “Mental Hygiene Award.”
posted by Scott on 8-16-2007 at 10:43 am
Although good ol’ Albert has been mentioned, I propose one of the following:
The mental_floss Award for
Excellence
IN
Surpassing
Typical
Expectations and
Impressing
Nerds
or
Excellence
IN
Shifting
Typical
Expectations by
Inverting
Normalcy
or
Excellence
IN
Sparking
Thoughts and
Evoking
Ideas through
Novelty
(you could call them the Einsteins or the Alberts :)
posted by Beth on 8-16-2007 at 10:44 am
Name it the Peri.
posted by john on 8-16-2007 at 10:46 am
how ’bout the Isaac (after the Good Doctor)?
posted by Howie Modell on 8-16-2007 at 10:49 am
Jack.
Mental_floss’s Jack Awards. It’s useful so many ways, too, like
Jack of All Trades (most eclectic)
Jacked It Up (hacks, cracks, HowTos)
Jack Ass (most unsafe for work, most inappropriate, most sarcastic)
Hi-Jack (most off topic, most irrelevant, most absurd)
Lo-Jack (best recovery)
Jack Lalanne (best health related article, best sales pitch)
Jack Nicholson (most irreverent, best rant)
Jack Lemmon (worst career move, best comedic slant)
etc., etc.
posted by Gina on 8-16-2007 at 10:51 am
What about calling it the “The Unmentionable Mention” award.
You rarely hear ‘Best Reason to Spend $5000 on Underpants’ be mentioned :)
posted by Kelly on 8-16-2007 at 11:04 am
Since it’s paying tribute to things most ridiculous, I think a good name for a little silly statue guy would be Ludo, for ludicrous. Also, some more support for Ludo – Ludo Bagman from HPatGoF, quite a riduculous man though somewhat well meaning.
posted by LindsayD on 8-16-2007 at 11:46 am
The Nonsequiturs or The Nonsequities, simply based on all the non-sequitur type of awards being given out.
posted by Jonathan on 8-16-2007 at 11:50 am
The Elemental Award
posted by b.n. on 8-16-2007 at 11:54 am
How about “Nobody else Would Give Them Out” awards, NEWGTO for short?
Or a “Goldy”, assume the color is gold.
Or Nobles (Close, yet so far from a Nobel).
They could also be the/a “Golden Man”.
Another is the “Steins”, or a “Stein”, like Einstein.
Well that’s what I got.
posted by Emily on 8-16-2007 at 11:56 am
mental health award
posted by karen on 8-16-2007 at 11:59 am
Stop! Y’all are killin’ me!
posted by Miss Cellania on 8-16-2007 at 12:00 pm
Well the Academy Awards are called the Oscars.
The Antoinette Perry Awards are called the Tonys.
Mangesh, I suggest the Mental Floss Awards be named after you.
Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Mangys. :-)
posted by Sheldon Siegel on 8-16-2007 at 12:01 pm
How about the Vitruvians. The award could be Da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man wearing a mental_floss t-shirt.
posted by Gary on 8-16-2007 at 12:13 pm
How about:
Mental_Floss’ Hygienist Award (although not related to anything to do with hygiene, I think it fits with flossing.
How about the Mental Hygiene Award?
or
The Lincoln Parmly Award – The L.P.’s for short.
(after Levi Spear Parmly credited with inventing floss or promoting it, i forget. And also for Abe Lincoln. His name came up in the first several hits when I searched “famous mental”)
Or you can name it after Anthony Allen.
Anthony Allen Award (Triple A?)
(Anthony Allen is a random person generated on the Random Person Generator. He likes climbing trees, colouring in and dinner parties. He dislikes being in love, pop music, and being bare foot.)
posted by Nick on 8-16-2007 at 12:16 pm
How about the Good Hygenist awards?
posted by khm on 8-16-2007 at 12:16 pm
The trivies
posted by Nick on 8-16-2007 at 12:18 pm
X
Awarded at the Ex Parte
posted by GoingLikeSixty on 8-16-2007 at 12:20 pm
I suggest the Bad-Ass Mental_floss awards. Call it the BAMF for short. Because, let’s face it, Mental_floss is bad-ass.
posted by thedistractor on 8-16-2007 at 12:20 pm
The Underscores or The Undeserved or Grave Rollers (based on how ridiculous most of it will be) or if you go Einstein related as everyone has mentioned, you have to do the Albies or Berts — shortening makes it more endearing.
posted by Moni Haley on 8-16-2007 at 12:21 pm
The Moxies
mox.ie (noun) courage combined with inventiveness
and I just like the sound of it…
The Mental_Floss Moxies
posted by Brandy on 8-16-2007 at 12:23 pm
The Willy Man
Pea Hatti
The Hatti Pea
posted by GoingLikeSixty on 8-16-2007 at 12:29 pm
Cephalanalectomies
posted by Melissa on 8-16-2007 at 12:33 pm
How about the Albies?
Or the Treblas? (Albert spelled backwards.)
posted by Paul on 8-16-2007 at 12:41 pm
I like either The Moxies or The Mental Hygiene Award. Or yiou could call them The Esotericas.
posted by Sally on 8-16-2007 at 12:41 pm
The Brain Trust
posted by Terry on 8-16-2007 at 12:42 pm
I think they should be called Fred. Just Fred. It will leave everyone else scratching their heads….
posted by KMJ on 8-16-2007 at 12:45 pm
The SUPERFLOSS Award.
Able to leap….well, you know.
posted by JackD on 8-16-2007 at 12:45 pm
how about one of these:
Mental_applause
Mental_apploss
Mental_stein
ridicu_floss
mental_boss
mental_floss_boss
posted by kathy on 8-16-2007 at 12:50 pm
How about the Griffins after the king of trivia.
posted by Peter P on 8-16-2007 at 12:56 pm
I think they’re Perfectly Cromulent Awards.
posted by Aaron on 8-16-2007 at 1:11 pm
Glossy Flossies
Mental Wonders
The Ooohhs… (sound typically made after reading mental_floss…as in ooohh, that’s cool, or ooohh, I need to try that, or ooohh, bad idea)
alternate option The Huhs…as in huh, I didn’t realize that, or huh, who would do that to a chicken?
Mental Ticklers or just the Ticklers
posted by Laura on 8-16-2007 at 1:12 pm
Interrobang ?!
posted by spavis on 8-16-2007 at 1:14 pm
I didn’t look through the others, so i apologize if there are any repeats. Great minds…
My Names:
Medulla of Honor
The Effigies
The Sharptacks
The Lobies
The Oblongatas
The Barmies
The Coveted Hairbrainer
posted by Pj on 8-16-2007 at 1:33 pm
Flossopher
Flosser
posted by MSC on 8-16-2007 at 1:35 pm
Something dealing with Wisdom Teeth. The Widsom Teeth Awards? Floss…teeth… WISDOM teeth. Instead of handing out a gold statue to recipients of the award, you can hand out a big plastic wisdom tooth!
posted by cyncity on 8-16-2007 at 1:37 pm
The Mossies
posted by lex on 8-16-2007 at 1:39 pm
Flossopher or Flosser Award
posted by MSC on 8-16-2007 at 1:41 pm
The Junkie
posted by Rod on 8-16-2007 at 1:44 pm
the cerebral fandangles…
posted by Sarah on 8-16-2007 at 1:54 pm
It’s got to be a “doozy”!
posted by Danny on 8-16-2007 at 1:55 pm
Two Choices:
1. Loki was the trickster god in Norse Mythology considered (see the Wiki on him) the “contriver of all fraud” and a “celestial con man”. It has the ring of typical awards, isn’t copywrited, and the meaning fits well. What could be better???
a second alternative is a bit less well-known and doesn’t roll of the tongue as well as Loki, but it fits: Koalemos (sometimes spelled with a C) was the god of foolishness & stupidity in Greek Mythology.
posted by Sid Morrison on 8-16-2007 at 2:17 pm
The Smart Ass Award
or the Assie
posted by Ed on 8-16-2007 at 2:18 pm
What about “Golden Toothpick”?
posted by Frank314 on 8-16-2007 at 2:42 pm
The Floss Gunk awards
posted by Mackenzie on 8-16-2007 at 2:44 pm
The Floscars is the best suggestion so far….
posted by Francine on 8-16-2007 at 2:51 pm
How about healthy_gums or pearly_whites
posted by Sean on 8-16-2007 at 2:51 pm
The Nameless
posted by Kerrie on 8-16-2007 at 2:52 pm
How about the…
Ringadingdongdandys
posted by Cindy on 8-16-2007 at 3:05 pm
The Golden MF’r
posted by Andy on 8-16-2007 at 3:11 pm
The Grande M-er F-er.
posted by Susan on 8-16-2007 at 3:14 pm
I’d say: Schrödingers
Until you open the magazine and determine, you may or may not qualify for a category that either does or does not exist and you may or may not have been nominated, won, lost or have had no mention at all.
posted by Ed on 8-16-2007 at 3:31 pm
Anagrams:
Mental Floss – Flotsam Lens
Mental Floss Award – Atlas Frowns Medal
posted by andy on 8-16-2007 at 3:31 pm
And, as I forgot, you can shorten them to the Schrodies.
posted by Ed on 8-16-2007 at 3:32 pm
Whatever we call it, the award should be one of those squooshy tie-dye brains.
posted by Sandy on 8-16-2007 at 3:35 pm
I’m going with “Brain Cavities”
posted by steve K on 8-16-2007 at 3:39 pm
The Smarty Pant Awards. And the Smarty Pants go to…
posted by Jessica on 8-16-2007 at 3:55 pm
How about Super_floss, as in superfluous
I also like the “Nobody else would give them out” awards
And the Nonsequiters. It could be a giant question mark.
posted by Colin on 8-16-2007 at 4:09 pm
The Golden Albies
Mental Medals
Floss’s Golden Figures
Smarty Statues
Mental Nods
Mental Accolades
Albie’s Award
Patent Prizes
Relativity Rewards
posted by Erika on 8-16-2007 at 4:17 pm
In tribute to publisher Will Pearson,
The Mental Piercin’s
posted by Bryan on 8-16-2007 at 4:40 pm
Brain thumb-grooves.
posted by John S. on 8-16-2007 at 5:06 pm
Emmy C2 Award
(e=mc2)
Fuzzy Spock Award
Smartacus Award
Intellegentia Maximus Award
Superior Cranium Award
99.9% Award
High Cutie Award
posted by Marisa on 8-16-2007 at 5:21 pm
Boy, there are some good ones, but I think it will be hard to top “The Loki” suggested by #90.
As I understand it, the award is for ridiculousness … Mental Floss as a whole concerns knowledge in general, not just silly & stupid stuff, so it makes sense to me NOT to call it a Flossie — that should get reserved for something of merit. Foolishness, trickery, and shams is what Loki is all about.
posted by Fred Nader on 8-16-2007 at 5:22 pm
How about the Random Floss Awards.
Raffies for short.
posted by Gary on 8-16-2007 at 5:26 pm
i think that you should call them .. pluckies … cause you kind of plucked the catagories out of your …err thin air lol
posted by janet on 8-16-2007 at 5:40 pm
The Thingamajigs
or
The Kennies’ (like Ken Jennings, he knows random stuff)
or
The ?’s
posted by alex on 8-16-2007 at 5:43 pm
The Synapses
posted by Relundford on 8-16-2007 at 5:50 pm
Truth Picks
Mental ‘wards
Think Wells
Sur Prizes
Light Bulbs
Synapses
posted by Raymond N on 8-16-2007 at 8:18 pm
Anyone for complemental_glossy, and the glossies?
posted by mark on 8-16-2007 at 8:23 pm
The Einey’s
posted by Chris S. on 8-16-2007 at 8:27 pm
How about….
The Einey’s or Einies
Sorry if this goes through twice, I had trouble submitting
posted by Chris S on 8-16-2007 at 8:30 pm
factum : Latin for accomplishment, work, act, achievement.
posted by Andrew Woodbridge on 8-16-2007 at 9:35 pm
How about the Non Sequitur Award (since things are so random and nonlinear). They can be called Nonsie’s for short, a play on onesies (because onesies are awesome!) and a self-deprecating reference to how unimportant random things can be perceived.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Or since the award doesn’t have to be an “award” per se (like an Oscar or something), what about the “Medal of Awesome?” Like a Congressional Medal of Awesome? Or in this case, it can’t be Congressional (for obvious reasons), so maybe a Scholastic Medal of Awesomeness or some variant.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Or the “Perfect Attendants” award (pun intended). Because seriously, since we attend their websites, we’re perfect.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Floss Eisley. I don’t know why, but Star Wars rocks. You could call the winner the “Boss with the Floss.”
posted by Kenny C. on 8-16-2007 at 10:54 pm
The Golden Floss (an allusion to “The golden fleece” of the Jason and the Argonauts legend.)
posted by Tdave on 8-17-2007 at 2:51 am
It sure looks like the Oscar goodie bag,
So here goes:
(1) Oss-Floss by M’Gsh
(meaning Oscar Floss by Mangesh, … remember Osh Kosh by M’Gosh?)
(2) Mental-loot (M’Loot)
(3) Flosscartel
posted by Sunny Sharma on 8-17-2007 at 4:05 am
This is easy…The Alberts! Or The Einsteins, but The Alberts sound better.
posted by Rory Flynn on 8-17-2007 at 6:34 am
Calibrate
posted by shekhar on 8-17-2007 at 7:12 am
Okay, another day, another play
ipse dixit, a latin phrase meaning “because I say so”, could be shortened to ipsies
borrowing from old mtn bike lingo, hoopty whoopties or oops or oopsies
TMI, for too much information (or Three Mile Island, site of a nuclear incident) could be pronounced Timmy
Vujas, from George Carlin’s vuja de–the feeling that you’ve never been here before
or how about the Dillsy, from DLS or dirty little secret
or, building on the comments of previous posters, the Flossifer stone.
posted by Tom on 8-17-2007 at 7:42 am
How about “Occum’s Golden Razor” award. After-all he did say keep it simple or usually the simplest explanation is the correct one!
posted by John Brown on 8-17-2007 at 9:49 am
You could call them the Fallsen Toms. It’s an anagram for Mental Floss.
posted by Seth on 8-17-2007 at 10:03 am
[M]ental Fl[oss] = Moss
Hence, The Mossy (the award) and The Mossies (the overblown, over-the-top ceremony, and a group of the awards). Either one would work.
The award itself should be a little bronze statue of a brain that actually dispenses dental floss and can be refilled. A functional honor would be unique.
posted by Dag on 8-17-2007 at 10:18 am
I haven’t read all the posts ahead of me so forgive me if this is a repeat. In the true fashion of awards the name does not normally represent any direct corellation to the reason for the award. It is usually named for somebody, an idea (perhaps), or some idiotic reason that becomes trivia itself. This award should be named after yourselves….
The WILLAGESH or MANGILL
I like the “Mangill” because of the double meaning myself. It could be a lifelong legacy you leave behind in addition to the magazine and the website. Add this to your empire!!
posted by Shari on 8-17-2007 at 11:05 am
The Monumental_floss Awards
The Pi Awards (Einstein was born on March 14th, i.e. 3.14!)
or
The Drivel Awards
posted by Rebecka on 8-17-2007 at 11:06 am
Apropos Nil Award
posted by Kassie on 8-17-2007 at 12:33 pm
How about “The Etcetera” Awards?
You know, etc., etc.
posted by Marie on 8-17-2007 at 1:12 pm
I nominate the Plaque Awards! The award can be a Plaque Plaque.
Cheerio…
posted by Allison on 8-17-2007 at 1:48 pm
How about the Electric Shock Award or the Lithium Award?
posted by Barb on 8-17-2007 at 2:16 pm
The Chives.
posted by Michael Fox on 8-17-2007 at 2:16 pm
I suggest:
The Awardies.
Let’s keep it simple and basic. And memorable.
posted by Bob Canter on 8-17-2007 at 2:27 pm
how bout…..
the WellMangled
(for Will and Mangesh who do all they can to mangle our minds with their witticisms and tests!
posted by al on 8-17-2007 at 2:34 pm
The Smarties.
posted by Mark on 8-17-2007 at 2:35 pm
How about The Berties (after Albert Einstein).
posted by Average Jane on 8-17-2007 at 2:35 pm
You guys are taking yourselves too seriously, with all these erudite plays on words.
Just call them the Golden Bananas and be done with it.
posted by Tiny Hands McFudge on 8-17-2007 at 2:54 pm
CLEAR AS A BELL MENTAL FLOSS
posted by MARY WENTE on 8-17-2007 at 3:07 pm
How about Mental Ace Award.
Or, Mind Ace Award?
Or, Mind Glitz Award?
Or, Mental Gold Award?
Or, Mental Rocket Award?
posted by Aqvinas Gamini on 8-17-2007 at 3:17 pm
I say the Albies. Albert Einstein is undboubtably the mascot of the brand Mental Floss. To not have awards named after him would be…well…not right. Albie! Albie! Albie!
posted by Courtney on 8-17-2007 at 3:21 pm
the Flossman award
posted by Grazia on 8-17-2007 at 3:37 pm
GREAT – The Albie(s)
TrilliBean Says:
August 16th, 2007 at 9:36 am
The Einstein Award(s), lovingly referred to as the Albie(s).
posted by ponderGirl on 8-17-2007 at 3:37 pm
The RTs (the Real Truth) awards. Some of the stuff you come up with is really all that counts.
posted by Jack Kelly on 8-17-2007 at 3:44 pm
What about The Golden Flossies?
Or going along the lines of Einstein:
The Albies
The Hynie-Einies
posted by Johanna on 8-17-2007 at 3:45 pm
How about “The Miff” awards, as in “Let’s find out who gets ‘miffed’ this year!”
posted by Super Emet on 8-17-2007 at 3:54 pm
I respectfully submit:
The Bossy Flossies
: )
Or, the Becky Jenkins Award of Excellence.
Or, the Mudflaps. I dont’ know why. i just like it. : )
posted by Becky on 8-17-2007 at 3:56 pm
I like two …
Nowyas … as in Now ya know !!
but my favoroite would be …
Geek God …
posted by Bill Keevan on 8-17-2007 at 3:57 pm
The Incisors
The Pop Rocks (remember when you ate them? That’s how it feels to win.)
posted by margot on 8-17-2007 at 4:07 pm
The “Brain-O’s”…or “Brain Oh’s”…Picture of a little brain with a surprised expression….()O…In 3D…2 halves of the brain separated by a ring…easy to floss!
Sounds a little like a make-ya-smarter cereal, or a caustic knowledge draining potion…but it has a catchy ring to it!
posted by Dr. Lonny on 8-17-2007 at 4:08 pm
Perhaps you ought to
consider
calling it
“BOB”
Blatantly
Ostentatious
Bilge
posted by Gammazona on 8-17-2007 at 4:15 pm
Plain and simple:
the Come-and-get’ems.
posted by Erin on 8-17-2007 at 4:17 pm
The Maple Bars
posted by Bart King on 8-17-2007 at 4:25 pm
what about the “M.F’s”? Or Crazy M.F.’s.
posted by kristin on 8-17-2007 at 4:28 pm
Give the award a french twist:
mental-soie = Mental Floss
Soyeux = Flossy
Futé-Âne = Smart Ass
Futé = Smart
Sourd-Âne = Dumb Ass
Futé-Soyeux = Smart Flossy
I favorite is “The Futé”
posted by Bopa on 8-17-2007 at 4:40 pm
How about:
The Genius awards (genie’s for short)
The cerebellums
The Braniacs
the WHAT THE____!?!?!?!? awards
posted by Kritikritter on 8-17-2007 at 4:47 pm
ok firstly we should have 2 names one for the ceramony and one for the award u know like how the acadamy awards has oscars? I liked goinglikesixty’s first one
posted by lily on 8-17-2007 at 4:49 pm
I’m all about “the Flossies”.
posted by jill on 8-17-2007 at 4:52 pm
How about the MF-ers, after Mental Floss, of course. The first annual MF-ers has such a nice ring to it.
posted by Matt on 8-17-2007 at 4:55 pm
how about The 48smarts award. 48 means crazy in cop talk.
posted by Michelle S on 8-17-2007 at 5:00 pm
Uhm, I meant that to be received in the best possible way, really.
Luv Ur rag.
posted by Gammazona on 8-17-2007 at 5:07 pm
An Earwax! The best golden nuggets we flossed out….
posted by Heidi on 8-17-2007 at 5:11 pm
If you could work it our with George Carlin Brain Drop would be perfect
posted by Jack Quick on 8-17-2007 at 5:15 pm
Awww, I was going to say the Einie’s but someone already said it. I also have to say i love the mental hygiene idea. I think the award should be a bronzed box o’ floss! (with the lid open and bronze floss coming out of course!) Well, anyways, I’m so excited I finally got around to renewing my subscription!
posted by grace2you on 8-17-2007 at 5:41 pm
Pavlov’s blog
posted by Jesse Z on 8-17-2007 at 6:01 pm
Reason
posted by Mary Lee on 8-17-2007 at 6:05 pm
The Prions
posted by Kathie R. on 8-17-2007 at 6:11 pm
The Lanies (short for Miscellany)
posted by Ed on 8-17-2007 at 6:18 pm
In honor of our soon to be former President. The award is to be called “The Shrub” as in a small bush. Each recipient will be given a small potted bush in recognition of his/her/their accomplishment.
posted by G. A. McGuffin on 8-17-2007 at 6:22 pm
it MUST be “The Albie’s”
posted by robb on 8-17-2007 at 6:32 pm
How about the “Life is nature’s way of keeping meat fresh” awards?
posted by Stan on 8-17-2007 at 6:41 pm
The Golden Crown Award.
posted by Tamie on 8-17-2007 at 6:45 pm
I propose “The Ganglia”
posted by maggie on 8-17-2007 at 6:45 pm
The Hecates
Hecate is the Greek equivalent of the Roman goddess Trivia.
posted by Narre on 8-17-2007 at 6:51 pm
How about “The Erudities”? The after-party could be the “Smarty Party.”
posted by Emily M. on 8-17-2007 at 6:52 pm
I definitely think the award should have something to do with Einstein. I was going to suggest the Albies, but several people beat me to it!
I also liked the idea of the Schrodies, and let’s not forget Niels Bohr. Although having a Bohring award might not be the way to go!
posted by Sue on 8-17-2007 at 6:57 pm
Well, I think there should be a category for the most blatant “Emperor’s new clothes” episode. (The Barry Bonds home run disgrace would be a strong contender) and I think that one possibility for a title would be the “Anderson” after Hans Christian (The author of the above piece)
Another idea for the title would be the “Sugar Frosted Award” Named after the ever popular doughnut. The reason for this is that every dentist owns one, and sometimes two, doughnut stores as an investment or to pay for his or her retirement – in Canada anyway.
Best regards,
John Tawn
posted by John Tawn on 8-17-2007 at 7:08 pm
I suggest that the awards be called “The Ecclectoids.”
Ecclectoid is a play on “factoid”, a term attributed to Norman Mailer’s first usage in 1973. He intended factoid to mean a falsehood that acquired the imprimatur of truth simply by repetition in the media. Today, most people use factoid to mean a nugget of knowledge that they believe is true but in actuality may be apocryphal. A factoid often is presented as a non sequitur.
I define an ecclectoid as a genuinely true fact that can be confirmed in readily available reference sources.
posted by Stephen Komor on 8-17-2007 at 7:31 pm
Smarties Award!
Euridites Award!
Myflossie Award!
posted by pia on 8-17-2007 at 7:36 pm
The Gone Mental Awards
The Missing My Mental Awards
The What an Ass Awards
The Watch This! Awards
The Dummy Awards
The Oh No You Didn’t!! Awards
The Mental Pride Awards
The Exceptionally Mental Awards
The Mentally Gifted Awards
posted by J. Price on 8-17-2007 at 7:39 pm
Well, since there is confusion about what to name the award, I suggest you call it The Ultimate Flummox!
posted by Cheryl on 8-17-2007 at 7:49 pm
hmmm …
Mental Floss Award
No Krut Award
posted by claudia on 8-17-2007 at 7:58 pm
Tanned, rested, and ready award. It purports to something big.
posted by Julster on 8-17-2007 at 7:59 pm
The “Monties,” named for Monty Python, the epitome of all things ridiculous.
The “IRLs” (pronounced “Earls”)since these ridiculous things actually happen in real life.
posted by Susan on 8-17-2007 at 8:07 pm
Here are a few to add:
The Savants (savanties?)
The Idiot Savants (the i-dots)
The Pseudo Savants (the pseu-vanties)
The Brainiacs
The Mind Choppers
Brain Jam (like toejam but… okay, maybe not)
The Brain Bunnies (for no particular reason)
The Non-Award Awards
The Intellecties
The Evolutionary Awards (an homage to The Darwins)
The Einstein Awards (The Stein-ies)
The Brain Drains
The Mind Flush Awards
posted by way-cool-junior on 8-17-2007 at 8:18 pm
The Dentals? 4 out of 5 Awards shows prefer them.
posted by way-cool-junior on 8-17-2007 at 8:20 pm
The Plaque
posted by Elisa on 8-17-2007 at 8:22 pm
the “Brain Plaques”
posted by Cole on 8-17-2007 at 8:22 pm
Cranial Crunch Award
posted by Alex Newman on 8-17-2007 at 8:25 pm
Right Brain – Left Brain…NO BRAIN !
posted by PaBear Messer on 8-17-2007 at 8:26 pm
The Golden Crown
posted by Tamie on 8-17-2007 at 8:33 pm
Chompers
An award for something that would make a person chomp down on his/her cigar in exasperation, surprise, or disdain. Of course, the award itself would be a resin cigar with teeth marks. The cigar band would be inscribed with the Mental Floss logo. (Einstein smoked cigars, right?)
posted by v lochner on 8-17-2007 at 8:37 pm
THE CATASTROPHIC ACHIEVEMENT AWARDS
“The Catchies”
posted by Casey on 8-17-2007 at 8:37 pm
I agree with some of the submissions regarding naming the award after the creators…. but use the word HONOR
Mangill Honor
posted by JB on 8-17-2007 at 8:43 pm
What about these three:
Uncle Will’s special kiss
Smart award of the year by Mental Floss
So you smart As* award
posted by george S. on 8-17-2007 at 8:44 pm
How About “Creme de Mental”?
posted by Val Halla on 8-17-2007 at 8:59 pm
I suggest “the Brain Busters” as the formal name, and the nick name can be “the Buster”, or just “the Bust” Who wouldn’t want to get a bust?
You could also use “the Mind Bender Award” and call it “the Bender” After all, whoever thought of the ludicrous thing being recognized must have been on a bender.
posted by Michael on 8-17-2007 at 9:04 pm
I vote for the M.F.er. (The MF stands for Mental Floss, btw). Second choice: The Appendix.
posted by Steve A on 8-17-2007 at 9:04 pm
‘Esties
Missing the b as in not good enough to even make the “b” list. :) I’m sure it will be a great and life-changing read but I meant that the awards were like the “b” movie list (or just below) – not known, not respected and only really dedicated movie buffs know about them… like us knowledge junkies and these “facts”.
or Bees
posted by RL on 8-17-2007 at 9:08 pm
How about “Floss Dailys”?
posted by will jaskowiak on 8-17-2007 at 9:19 pm
How about:
1. The Einie
2. The Golden Geek
posted by Doug on 8-17-2007 at 9:21 pm
I think “The Floscars” was BRILLIANT! It get’s my vote – if I don’t come up with a good one ;)
I also thought “The Flossie” was totally great – but, true, a little too obvious…
My suggestion:
The What The Floss? Awards (of course, WTF’s for short, hee, hee) It’s definitely appropriate for all things ridiculous.
I’m all tapped out for now, but I think I’ll be back…=[
posted by ZoaMoo on 8-17-2007 at 9:24 pm
Broca’s Award
The Pons Award
The Basal Ganglias
The SUINEG Award (Genius spelled backwards)
posted by Renee on 8-17-2007 at 9:25 pm
And the flossilicious goes to…
posted by Martina on 8-17-2007 at 9:26 pm
My suggestion: The Thinkos.
It’s like a typo, but mental…
posted by Lura Romei on 8-17-2007 at 9:36 pm
“The Thinker” awards.
posted by Linda on 8-17-2007 at 9:40 pm
I think the Jenius Awards would be funny. (And yes, before you slam me, I know it’s misspelled!)
posted by Lewlew on 8-17-2007 at 9:47 pm
my .02:
the Hi-Q’s. a play on both “high IQ’s” and Haiku, all nominations/awards could be given in Haiku form thus ADDING to the intelligence of the awards!
posted by mri on 8-17-2007 at 9:57 pm
How about a name that represents Albert Einstein, a person you’ve had several front covers on? For instance, how about the Einstein Awards? The Alberts? The Steiners? The Relativity Awards?
That’s it for now.
posted by Sean on 8-17-2007 at 10:01 pm
wilma
1) obvious for will and mangesh. (should be named for the two of you who decide recipients :)
2) twist that it’s a female name.
3) evokes memories of cartoons/childhood/silliness
posted by doe on 8-17-2007 at 10:33 pm
Schumks
posted by Peggy Probus on 8-17-2007 at 10:36 pm
The Nifty Neuron Award (affectionately known as “The Neuron”)
posted by Chuck on 8-17-2007 at 10:42 pm
Make little award certificates (even if they’re just the headers for the articles) called “Freudian Slips”.
posted by Becca on 8-17-2007 at 10:49 pm
How about the “Flental Mosses”. Or as a tribute to the magazine’s title format, just “the_awards”. You could call them the “underscores” for short.
I love you guys. :)
posted by Jaye Hopkins on 8-17-2007 at 11:08 pm
The Esotericas
Definition of esoterica: things understood by or meant for a select few
In other words, the knowledge and information we get from mental_floss is known only by those of us who read the magazine. Plus esoterica is a really cool word that’s fun to say.
posted by Michael on 8-18-2007 at 1:53 am
The Mentals
posted by Patti McCracken on 8-18-2007 at 2:17 am
The OMG Award
The Ms. Elf Talons Award (perfect anagram of Mental Floss)
The Mad Leonard Award
The Shiney Hard Larry Award
posted by Larry on 8-18-2007 at 3:35 am
How about The Cavities?
or
Mental Soap
(fun brainwash)
posted by Paul on 8-18-2007 at 3:47 am
The name of the award should be:
The You Decide Award
posted by Lou Hood on 8-18-2007 at 5:02 am
The Boxy (the award for those out of the box!)
The Denture (the award for those who made our teeth fall off)
The scrubby – the award for whole body flossing. (the statue looks a bit like a guy holding a scrubbing mop.
Flosstazm – the mentalfloss orgasm
award
flosstuition – mental floss beyond intuition
flossum – mental floss and quantum (leap)
posted by Saar Herman on 8-18-2007 at 5:29 am
twisted tim
posted by tam on 8-18-2007 at 5:51 am
How about “The Trivials?” It seems to me that most of the award shows that end up on TV or other wise reported should be called “The Trivial Awards,” so why not do it for real? :^)
posted by Ross on 8-18-2007 at 6:51 am
The “Wacky Peoples” Award
posted by Katrina on 8-18-2007 at 7:05 am
The obvious would be:
THE GOLDEN FLOSSIE!
or just
THE GOLDEN FLOSS!
posted by Litl bits on 8-18-2007 at 7:09 am
Awards have to be The Berties
posted by Bill on 8-18-2007 at 7:09 am
Maybe The Mentality Awards, like the Academy Awards?
Naming things is hard!
posted by jamie g on 8-18-2007 at 7:29 am
What about the MF? MF of the Year? MeFo? (Sounds kinda like an art museum!)
I, myself, would be honored to be named MF of the Year.
posted by Luc Rodgers on 8-18-2007 at 7:53 am
The No Brainers Awards
It’s a no brainer
posted by Troy on 8-18-2007 at 8:21 am
SMARTYS (not “smarties” – mmm…)
OR
BRAINYS
…and the “BRAINY” goes to…
posted by Christos on 8-18-2007 at 8:29 am
Plaque Plaque
posted by Wynn H on 8-18-2007 at 9:23 am
I like the suggestion “The Alberts” because it sounds kinda like the “The Oscars” but better.
posted by Dan on 8-18-2007 at 9:30 am
THE MENFLAS
THE FLOTSAMS (OR JETSAMS, OR BOTH)
THE OUTIES (SHORT FOR OUTRAGEOUS)
posted by John Karosas on 8-18-2007 at 9:30 am
How about “Hoot Canal”? Some of the stuff you report is just as painful.
posted by Les on 8-18-2007 at 9:30 am
“The Choppers” (Teeth)
posted by Erika on 8-18-2007 at 9:30 am
I’ve come up with 3 more ideas. I did a little research. The part of the brain that controls memory is the “hippocampus”. How about the “Hippocampus award!” or the “Golden Lobe Award!”. or the “Frontal Lobe Award!”. You might even be able to place the word “Golden” before “Hippocampus”.
posted by John Brown on 8-18-2007 at 9:34 am
OOPS! I forgot one. The “Cagey Lobe Award!”. Thanks
posted by John Brown on 8-18-2007 at 9:36 am
The Stymies
There are but few who have ideas and are, at the same time, capable of action. Ideas enlarge but stymie, action enlivens but confines.
Goethe
posted by robin on 8-18-2007 at 9:36 am
To the MF Rep:
How about the “Synapse Awards”? Or the statuette called a “Synapsie”? See… mine are always firing. See ya’
Ray Hathaway
posted by Ray Hathaway on 8-18-2007 at 9:46 am
The MF Awards
latneM ssolF sdrawA
“You Name the Award” Awards
the “Facts of Life” Awards
posted by Jackie on 8-18-2007 at 9:48 am
“The Golden Flosser”
posted by Erika on 8-18-2007 at 9:58 am
Here are three ideas:
Flossment Glossies
Fental Moss Masters
Whoforgottofloss? Annual Irritants
Thanks,
To,
posted by Tim Green on 8-18-2007 at 10:01 am
the gray matter matters Award
posted by Carol Tietsworth on 8-18-2007 at 10:10 am
I stand by the “Golden Toothpick”.(see #92.)
The ‘Pickies? ‘Pickers?
Anyway, it would make for the coolest trophy ever.
posted by Frank314 on 8-18-2007 at 10:25 am
Hahaha… I like ZoaMoo’s:
“THE WHAT THE FLOSS? AWARD” / “WTF’s”
That’s hilarious!!
I want to know what the award will acutally look like – that would make naming it a little easier, don’t you think? Or do you need a name before you design it… hmm, quite a pickle.
My vote goes to “The What The Floss? Award” How can you NOT love the
WTF’s?? Any thing that’s just insanely ridiculous should get an award called the “WTF Award” But it’s not *bad* because the F is for “Floss” Don’t you see? It’s GREAT! Kudos! ;0)
posted by Bosco on 8-18-2007 at 10:34 am
How about the “Whaaaaaaaa?” award?!
posted by Edwina Caito on 8-18-2007 at 10:39 am
How about the “Holy Moly!”
or the “OMG!” (it could be an exclaimation point!)
or the “AYK” (pronounced ache) award (meaning “Are You Kidding?”)
or the “Whoa!” award
or the “Golden Frying Pan” (stay with me here…remember the old “This is your brain. This is your brain on drugs. Amy questions” commercials?)
Whatever you choose, have fun with it!!
posted by Edwina Caito on 8-18-2007 at 10:48 am
The Brain or the synapse
or
the sara for Saraswati – Hindu Goddess of Knowledge and Wisdom, its also a take on cerebellum
or
Coeus (also Koios) was the Titan of intelligence
posted by donna on 8-18-2007 at 11:08 am
Demental Loss Award
Brain Strain Award
Brain Pain Award
Oh My Gosh Floss Award
Lights On But Nobody’s Home Award
Floss Toss Award
Golden Floss Award
Brush Up Award
Gum Disease Award
Plaque Plaque
:-)
posted by Zanne on 8-18-2007 at 11:34 am
‘You’ve won an Award’
posted by Marley on 8-18-2007 at 11:40 am
How about the “Glossy Flossies”?
posted by Larry on 8-18-2007 at 11:52 am
The Swabs
or
The Cotton Swabs
or
The Swabbies
When I think of the name Mental Floss, I always think of a guy flossing the goop out his brain by passing it through his ears. So, he would need a swab too. :-)
posted by Kim on 8-18-2007 at 12:00 pm
The “Mentards”
posted by Frank on 8-18-2007 at 12:00 pm
Lufr Brain, right Brain,…NO BRAIN.
posted by Lee Messer on 8-18-2007 at 12:25 pm
The FLOSScars what else nothing else is better…..someone probably thought of this but if not YA!
….”and the flosscar goes to?!?!”
posted by sean on 8-18-2007 at 12:30 pm
My fave so far was “Creme de Mental”
shades of Dr Demento :-)
I like MF Awards, but perhaps it’s too simple.
posted by Runeshadow on 8-18-2007 at 12:38 pm
I think that good names would be:
The Flatulated Facts awards
The warped-genius awards
The Einstein-Edsel Awards
The Genius-Gone-Wild Awards
(after Girls Gone Wild videos)
Moments of uncommon sense awards
posted by stuart mendelson on 8-18-2007 at 12:42 pm
How about the Brainy -Look I won Won I Brainy!Proving that I am —brainy LOL
posted by talia on 8-18-2007 at 1:09 pm
Conjunction junction says you should award Mentalades at your function (Mental Floss + Accolade.)
posted by Kasey on 8-18-2007 at 1:30 pm
the Kakas
the Middle English word for cake,
so the recipient of the award can say they “got their cake and can eat it too”
although I wouldn’t recommend eating it!
posted by dixiedigger88 on 8-18-2007 at 1:39 pm
I think they should be called the Underscores.
Or maybe the Low Line Awards
posted by Brandon on 8-18-2007 at 1:40 pm
The Ludys (for ludicrous)
The Loonys (for crazy)
The Ligers (just because, cool but absurd)
posted by sk on 8-18-2007 at 1:46 pm
They should be called Garage Sale Fodder.
posted by Larry on 8-18-2007 at 2:12 pm
the Kaka
the Middle English word for cake,
so the recipients can say they “got their cake and can eat it too”
although I don’t recommend eating it.
posted by dixiedigger on 8-18-2007 at 2:13 pm
I can’t spell; I meant Schmucks!
posted by Peggy Probus on 8-18-2007 at 2:36 pm
How about “Look ma, no cavities!” (from that very old toothpaste commercial) or “The Smile Club” — they put your kid’s smiling Polaroid into a photo album when they don’t have any cavities. As you can see, I love the dental connection, even if I am overdue for a check-up.
Keep up the great work!
posted by Paula on 8-18-2007 at 2:50 pm
My computer mispelled again!
Should be,
Left Brain, Right Brain… NO BRAIN!
posted by Lee Messer on 8-18-2007 at 4:12 pm
The Common Sense Isn’t Award, from Elbert Hubbard.
The Fickle Flosser of Fate
The Fickle Finger of Floss
The Golden Flosspick (You know, those plastic toothpicks with a U-shaped end and a piece of floss strung across.)
And, yes, the trophy should be a golden brain-shaped, refillable floss dispenser. Or maybe a golden man with that for his head. Holding a floss-pick
posted by Ingrid on 8-18-2007 at 4:38 pm
You could give out the “Crown of Laevus Levus” and for short “the Lefties”
posted by Rick on 8-18-2007 at 4:40 pm
“Plaque Piques”
or, in appropriate honor of Francis Vincent Zappa:
“Mental Toss Flycoons”
posted by Brian O'Keeffe on 8-18-2007 at 5:26 pm
The spiffin
the gollys
the waste watcher (spelled correctly)
the-only-award-you-will-ever-want-to-win
silly in seattle.
the runner up.
the last place.
wish this was the noble award.
filled with chocolate award.
I’m hungry award.
posted by Rookee Alding on 8-18-2007 at 5:50 pm
How about the Einsteinies?
posted by jennifer on 8-18-2007 at 5:51 pm
Faux Pas
posted by Sheryl on 8-18-2007 at 6:22 pm
The Just Deserts (*never desserts!)
The Trivialities
The Knowitalls
The Elixir Vitae
The Fixtures / Fixes
The Comeuppances
posted by Jen on 8-18-2007 at 7:23 pm
Anal Floss Award
posted by Penny McIntosh on 8-18-2007 at 7:32 pm
No Brainer Award
No brain no pain Award
posted by penny McIntosh on 8-18-2007 at 7:49 pm
The MFA
posted by Kate on 8-18-2007 at 8:23 pm
The Best Reason to Spend $5000.00 on Underpants:
So I can model them in with my cute buns instead of Paris Hilton’s skinny rump in the top fashion magazines.
posted by Fran Beamer on 8-18-2007 at 8:52 pm
Well, you have a lot of good names and ideas, so you might use several of them, to wit:
1) You need an award for something brilliant that worked out and was brilliant.
Example: Theory of Relativity
2) But you also need one for something that would have been praised as brilliant, had it worked out, but since it didn’t work out, it’s just another “D’oh!”…
Example: Democracy in the Middle East, The Berlin Wall, The Titanic, etc.
3) But you also need one for something that was done, but was just plain stupid, and DID work out after all.
Example: Hmmm…. Starting a Magazine with Mental Floss Ideas??? (Sorry!)
4) And then you need one for something that was obviously stupid from the start, but was done anyway, and yielded stupid results.
Example: Oh, there are too many to choose from. (This whole comment, for starters?) Most of Homer Simpson’s ideas?? ETC…..
5) Something that just does not fit into any other 4 categories. You know, something that happenend or that exists that is just plain weird.
Example: …Al Yankovich???
In short, you need 5 awards, and a name with 5 categories, or 5 different names.
I won’t submit any name ideas. All mine were given by others!
Anyhow. I still like the dental floss brain dispenser. It is a useful and practical keepsake award, unlike most of the stuff awarded out there.
posted by Pierre M Laberge on 8-18-2007 at 10:13 pm
How about one of these:
The Lame Lemon Award
The False Boobie Award
Salmon Felt Award (direct anagram of mental floss — okay, but it’s the best I can do with the letters I’ve been given ;)
Lost ‘n’ Flames (another anagram — give me a break, though, it’s 3:00 am)
Mental Mantelpiece
The Fierce Floss Award
Hey, do any of these work? I hope so, but, if not, at least I cracked myself up!
posted by Meg :) on 8-19-2007 at 1:14 am
The Charles Van Doren Award
posted by Hodiah on 8-19-2007 at 3:25 am
And the “Mental Floss Award” goes to ME!!
Or see if “Mensa” will let you use their name. Because “Mental Floss” is the most intelligent magazine out there.
posted by Cindy Nagy on 8-19-2007 at 4:35 am
It should be named the “Philo Award,” in honor of Philo T. Farnsworth.
posted by ordon Gardner on 8-19-2007 at 6:55 am
“The Smart Award”
because “smart” appears on every issue
posted by Betty on 8-19-2007 at 7:52 am
How ’bout the “Hoelotta Nuthen” award?
posted by Vinnie Martinelli on 8-19-2007 at 8:40 am
In “honor” of the outgoing presidential braintrust here’s my suggestion:
The ROVE AWARDS. Nothing like receiving a “Rovie” to cement your place in the Cerebral Hall of Fame. DIXI
Ray Hathaway
Drexel Hill PA
posted by Ray Hathaway on 8-19-2007 at 9:21 am
I suggest “The Insanely Obscure Information Awards” (IOIA) or “The Hawkers” after Uber-genius Stephen Hawking.
posted by will on 8-19-2007 at 10:31 am
The Most Dubious Achievement Awards
posted by Laura on 8-19-2007 at 10:33 am
The Smarties?
posted by meg on 8-19-2007 at 10:38 am
How about …
Best of the Worst
or
Oral Decay
posted by Miki Davis on 8-19-2007 at 10:55 am
The Ulta_Mental Awards
posted by Marie Roybal on 8-19-2007 at 12:40 pm
How about Flossers’ Plaque? Too much of it could lead to Alzheimers.
Or maybe The Golden Pants (since every smart ass should have them)?
posted by Perry Adanick on 8-19-2007 at 1:23 pm
I would say The Schadenfreudes or The Peculiarities.
posted by renee on 8-19-2007 at 2:00 pm
Since your articles lead us to view things differently, how about naming it: mentalfloss angle award.
posted by Phyllis on 8-19-2007 at 4:37 pm
the albies, for albert einstien.
or
the stienies.
posted by david on 8-19-2007 at 5:21 pm
The Thinker
The award, itself, could be Rodin’s thinker on a toilet, which is where I always read my Mental Floss magazine. What could be more perfect?
posted by Elodie Ackerman on 8-19-2007 at 5:46 pm
I know I would love to win “The Willman” award. In honor of WILL and MANgesh
Or perhaps The Synapse Award.
posted by Lauren on 8-19-2007 at 6:29 pm
Oooh, The Steinies. yay Einstein!
or, the Noddies.
Because Mental Floss nods to the random.
Or the Trivies! For trivia.
posted by Lauren on 8-19-2007 at 6:39 pm
The Trifles – a little something for making the world a trifle more interesting. It’s not necessarily somthing hugely important, but it’s not overlooked. It could be a box of waxed, mint-flavored floss or something.
posted by Jennifer on 8-19-2007 at 7:06 pm
the EinsteinTongues! Or at least I’ll name my band that.
I can just see the statuette now.
posted by scott on 8-19-2007 at 7:33 pm
-The Award For The Magazine Which Always Gets Rained On Whenever The New Issue Comes Which Gets Kind of Annoying After A While
-Award For Best Font Choices
-The Ham and Cheese award (because ham and cheese is awesome)
posted by Oxhorn on 8-19-2007 at 7:52 pm
The Lawn Dart
posted by Jennine on 8-19-2007 at 8:33 pm
The Minutia Award
posted by Jean on 8-19-2007 at 11:01 pm
The Cognito Awards.
posted by Emily on 8-19-2007 at 11:31 pm
For the awards how about the “Phrenic fandangles”. the best two words when you put mental and floss into thesaurus.reference.com.
posted by Peter Blanch on 8-19-2007 at 11:46 pm
- The Dufus Dividends
- The Cognitively Dissonant Distinction (CDD Awards)
- The Mental Floss Fork-out (award could be a golden fork)
posted by Timster on 8-20-2007 at 6:00 am
An Oscar with Floss is obviously a FLOSSCAR!
posted by Nelson on 8-20-2007 at 6:55 am
How about the “Brain Farts”?
posted by Tricia on 8-20-2007 at 7:09 am
How about The Einsteinians or The Freudians ,The Freudian Slips
posted by Scott on 8-20-2007 at 7:11 am
The Golden Noggin
posted by Brenda on 8-20-2007 at 7:23 am
Mental Plaque.
OR The Flossinossihilipilifications? (why do we need a short name?)
posted by Dibyo on 8-20-2007 at 7:35 am
The Mental Plaques? This is the best name since a plaque also represents a commmemorative plaque or something floss extracts!
or
The Flossinossihilipilifications?
posted by Dibyo on 8-20-2007 at 7:39 am
i imagine a coveted “golden water pik” of sorts.
posted by Lauren on 8-20-2007 at 8:14 am
I suggest the mental boners – who wouldn’t want to be the proud recipient of a boner?
posted by Kim on 8-20-2007 at 8:29 am
It has to be a:
Mental Plaque.
Maybe it could be a Molar.
No, no. It has to be a Mental Plaque.
posted by Deirdre Robinson on 8-20-2007 at 9:20 am
Call it the Flosscar (like Oscar).
posted by Aileen on 8-20-2007 at 9:21 am
A statue of A. Einstein with his tongue sticking out, definitely. I liked Beth’s take on the “Einstein”, with one small change:
The mental_floss Award for
Excellence
In
Surpassing
Typical
Expectations of
Intelligence and
Nonsense
posted by Squeedunk on 8-20-2007 at 9:35 am
I say the “Einsteins!”
posted by JoAnn on 8-20-2007 at 9:50 am
I think someone beat me to it, but how about the “Sexy M-F” awards?
posted by joel on 8-20-2007 at 10:20 am
The Melossies, of course!!!!
posted by Michelle on 8-20-2007 at 10:49 am
The turd blossom award!
The nerdcore award.
posted by george on 8-20-2007 at 10:58 am
How ’bout:
the “Flemmies”
the “Braino Award”
the “Golden Floss Award”
the “Whoduthunkits?”
posted by Billy on 8-20-2007 at 11:08 am
I suggest the “Noggin Noogies” as that best describes the sensation my brain cells experienced when I found out some poor fool had spent $5,000 on underpants.
posted by Christina on 8-20-2007 at 11:28 am
How about The Mental_Floss “So Flossy It’s Gotta Have an Award” Award…
Or the “So Good It’s Gotta Be Floss” Award…
posted by Stephanie on 8-20-2007 at 11:30 am
How about The Mossy Flossies? You know, a rolling stone gathers no moss and apparently these winners aren’t rolling……
posted by Freddie on 8-20-2007 at 11:37 am
ABC awards (Albert’s Brain Cramps)
Flossticles
The Golden Meatball
posted by Rick on 8-20-2007 at 12:40 pm
How about the “Practically Annual Smartass Awards”
posted by Leslie on 8-20-2007 at 12:52 pm
If the statue is a bust of Mr. Einstein, then the award should be called the Albie.
If the statue is a golden case of dental floss, the award should be the Flossie.
If the statue is a rock with green moss, then the award should be the Mossie.
I think the statue itself may reveal what the award should be called.
>
posted by KJ on 8-20-2007 at 1:54 pm
The Extra Lobe, as in this is so smart his brain must have an extra lobe.
For short, the EL, or the Ellies.
posted by Larry Fisher on 8-20-2007 at 3:44 pm
the incidental mental medal.
“immy” for short.
posted by erin on 8-20-2007 at 5:15 pm
How about:
Fantastic Floss
Fabulous Floss
(the FFA, Future Flossers of America)
Mental Magnus
Major Mental
Magnus Mental
posted by KEN on 8-20-2007 at 5:37 pm
How about the ‘Quotients’ ?
posted by Halston on 8-20-2007 at 6:07 pm
And the Quotient goes too…..
Yeah..I like it.
You guys should use it.
posted by Halston on 8-20-2007 at 6:09 pm
how about the grand coveted all knowing wise ass award?
Just kidding:
i will ponder on this for some time…
posted by Lesa on 8-20-2007 at 6:58 pm
Ok .. here goes:
the Grand PooBah of Mental Magnitude
Award , or something thereby as stuffy…
posted by Lesa on 8-20-2007 at 7:03 pm
The Earl Grey-Matter Award!
posted by Lesa on 8-20-2007 at 7:08 pm
How about: The Mental Flossies
How about: The Flossie Mentalities
posted by Rebecca C de Baca on 8-21-2007 at 12:19 am
How about: The Triments.
As we all know studies have shown that four out of five experts agree* that regular flossing between issues significantly increases one’s chances at getting the plaque(in lieu of a trophy of course).
*Okay, I still have to find five experts who care, but once I do, four of them will concur.
posted by Susan Priest on 8-21-2007 at 8:59 am
I like the Plank Awards, to celebrate his work, and the random nature of what is being awarded.
I also like the T-Backs as an unofficial nickname… Might as well help those who think with their nether regions to floss as well
posted by Daniel on 8-21-2007 at 9:23 am
How about the “Flossopher Stones”….. Got a nice ring to it.
posted by Cindy on 8-21-2007 at 10:14 am
“The Golden_Floss Awards”–though some or them may require an upgrade to Platinum.
posted by Steph on 8-21-2007 at 11:31 am
My submission is “Floss’d!” – or even “Flossed!” – which is a play on the television show “Punk’d”, starring Ashton Kutcher. The reasons:
1. your fabulous publications are far smarter than appear they on the surface (as I suspect is also the case with Ashton Kutcher);
2. they exhibit the same exuberant goofiness; and
3. your readers get “flossed” regularly!
posted by pythagoras on 8-21-2007 at 12:21 pm
Name for your new yearly award:
“BIG COMPIS MENTIS”
posted by Bill C on 8-21-2007 at 12:50 pm
Psyche Filamentous Accolade/s or the PFA’s PFA/s would be so fun to say.
posted by Alice Mc on 8-21-2007 at 2:13 pm
i’m thinking…..
The Not-So Trivial Awards
Yo Mama Awards
Don’t You Wish You Had This Award
perhaps something more like…..
The Award
which will go very nicely with the deep-voiced announcer guy you hire for such a special occasion
posted by Dipa on 8-21-2007 at 2:16 pm
My submission is “The Bossies” We’re just MAD about those cow awards!!
posted by Liz on 8-21-2007 at 3:05 pm
As someone lisps, I nominate:
Brain Teethers
posted by Kiva on 8-21-2007 at 5:14 pm
The Brainiwhack
posted by Ethna on 8-21-2007 at 5:32 pm
The Gray’s, for the gray matter, or the gray that matters…Winners will have to really make the gray. Or the Gray Matters-sounds important.
posted by william on 8-21-2007 at 10:10 pm
The Whizard
posted by william on 8-21-2007 at 10:11 pm
The “Strings” as in String theory
posted by Dave Hansen on 8-22-2007 at 6:17 am
Since the site is called… Mental Floss. The award should be entitled…
Crazy Clean or Crazy Cleanser!
posted by Natasha on 8-22-2007 at 7:51 am
How about:
Illuminati Intelligentsia Conferrals (IIC)- (and you can prounounce it like EEEEEEKKKK!!!! awards.)
/ or /
Egghead Accolades
/ or /
Double Dome Decree
posted by Shamayne on 8-22-2007 at 7:57 am
Great suggestions! Thought I’d add a few (some may have already been mentioned) for no particular reason.
The Naked Ape Awards
The Atomic Evolution awards (The Atom & E.V.s)
The Intelligent Designs
The Cerebrals
The Annual Award Awards
The Not Just Another Award Awards
The Grey Matters
The Natural Selections
The Unbearable Randomness of Being Awards (The URB-ies)
The Enamel-ies
The No-Fuss Awards
And of course the parodies of other awards:
The Anatomy Awards (too porno?)
The Anomaly Awards
The Phlegmies
The Oswalds
The Luminous Lobes
The Frontal Lobes
The Golden Lobes
The Cranial Choice Awards
The Brainberry Award
posted by pseudo-savant on 8-22-2007 at 10:29 am
The Tidy Whiteys
The Cranial Flush
posted by PseudoSavant on 8-22-2007 at 10:32 am
How about the Trivials….in recogintion of all the Trivia your magazine shares with us…
posted by Michelle on 8-23-2007 at 1:48 pm
Flossie rules although as one person suggested Mr. Flossie might work better given the anatomy of the statue.
Also try “The Mental Guy Award”
posted by Charlotte from Charlotte on 8-23-2007 at 7:43 pm
O.k., here it is …..
The Mentalenties!!
posted by Connie on 8-24-2007 at 2:16 pm
I have to go with Fernando’s idea: The Mental Plaque.
posted by DLF on 8-24-2007 at 4:02 pm
The Ludicrousies!
posted by Sarah on 8-24-2007 at 4:54 pm
Blinded Brain
Science Brain
Either one is good!
posted by Brenda on 8-29-2007 at 7:39 am
The Golden Floss Award
posted by Elaine on 9-29-2007 at 3:50 pm
This is my first visit, and I was thinking of:
“Sub-Mental Scholastics Award”
“Sub-Ridi-contious” (+) “(Award)” Short for Substandard / Ridiculous… how did this ever enter the true conscious of a human and not stay in the subconscious not to mention how it even got there…
Regards,
Bill
posted by Bill on 3-15-2008 at 3:33 pm