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This summer I stumbled upon a detox, and I’ve been so fascinated with it that I’m keeping it up. It’s like finally handing your body the microphone! It just has so much to say, and I want to give it the floor as long as I can stand it. And once it starts talking, the toxins keep coming. It’s our biggest internal organ, so I suppose that makes sense.
I had no idea it took so long to detox, or that your liver was in much worse shape right after you stop drinking than it ever was while regulating normal function in the face of any dinner party libation you might tilt its way. I haven’t had a hepatic function panel, but my acupuncturist confirmed that my liver started working overtime as soon as I stopped drinking–as if it were scrambling incase I might start soaking it with toxins again! So it’s back to the reishi tea, and if that doesn’t work, I’ll try anything just short of Prometheus’ “treatment” via-punitive-bird-of-prey.
Even if I didn’t want to invest in my lovely, three pound, football-shaped wonder organ, it’s possible it would still attract interest in the black market–especially if I were to be an executed prisoner, as the BBC found (organ trafficking bans aren’t exactly flourishing). Though I’d prefer to just be able to use it as collateral. I’m not going to ask you if you’ve received quotes on any of your organs, but I would be interested in hearing about any detoxes you’ve survived.
Comments (24)
Comment
“lovely, three pound, football-shaped wonder organ”, that’s so poetic haha.
On the subject of overworked livers, I actually had to do a full detox of mine (and I think I might need it again) a few years ago.
Up until that point, I’d been having wierd, broad-spectrum symptoms that no one could explain: blotchy, bluish skin, horrible acne, abdominal pains, itchy skin, odd rashes, etc. I went to an acupuncturist (who ROCKS, as you know) who told me that I had a toxic mold living in the walls of my house that was, in effect, poisoning me and putting a huge strain on my heart and liver.
She did a bunch of treatments and put me on a huge list of supplements including olive leaf extract and flora, then had me ozone my ENTIRE house. Fast forward a month and my liver and I were living in mold-free harmony.
The sad epilogue to my mini-saga is that I may have liver problems AGAIN. argh.
posted by heather on 9-1-2007 at 12:12 am
Becky. What the heck are you talking about?
“my acupuncturist confirmed that my liver started working overtime as soon as I stopped drinking”
obviously your liver is working to “detox” your body for the next 8 hours after you stop drinking, but I think you are talking about a much much larger time span. Like if you stop drinking for a week, your liver starts working overtime.
Could you please clear up the time frame you are talking about, and if you really do mean what I think you mean, can you include some links, or maybe quote a real doctor?
I’m also curious to know how much of a detox is mental and how much is a physical process. What do you think the percentages are?
posted by chris v on 9-1-2007 at 12:50 am
Acupuncturists are QUACKS. Toxic mold in your house is their biggest line ever. Heather- yours totally took you for a ride. How much money did you end up spending on all the treatments and the supplements? And who did you buy the supplements from? Her I bet. It seems to me that she just threw all this random shit at you and eventually something randomly worked. That or your condition cleared up on its own. And the fact that your problems are coming back doesn’t make you realize you were probably never completely cured in the first place?
I’m sorry to rant and rave but I’ve just seen too many relatives taken in by new-agey (or old-agey) type medical scammers.
posted by sense on 9-1-2007 at 3:02 am
I’ve done the master cleanse detox (a.k.a lemonade diet) a number of times. After each of them, I’d become absurdly drunk the very first time I’d have an alcoholic drink (and with just one! My friends really laughed at this, but it is SCARY if you don’t expect it to happen).
I used to think that it was due to the weight loss, but after reading your article now I suspect it may have to do with my liver doing some overtime…
posted by Mar on 9-1-2007 at 3:22 am
I’ve done the master cleanse too and am starting a new one tomorrow, as a matter of fact. With regard to what percentage is mental and what percentage is physical, does it really matter? At the end of the cleanse, I feel better … an amazing amount better. If it’s all psychological, I’ll take it. If it’s all physical, so much the better that I get the toxins out of my system.
All I know is that my psoriasis clears up, my muscles loosen, and I have more energy on less sleep. I can gauge when I need to detox again by how bad my energy levels and psoriasis is getting.
I agree that some people have a vested interest in offering you “advice”… but “real” doctors also fall into that category, you know. I come from a family chock full of doctors so I have sympathy for the medical profession, but I also understand its shortcomings.
The master cleanse is interesting in that you buy the book, you buy the ingredients at your local supermarket and you’re done. It’s not someone’s proprietary (”you have to buy my stuff for it to work”) system. And it works for me.
If it works for you and it’s not doing any harm then I say go for it. I don’t see how short term fasting can do any harm to a reasonably healthy person since it has been a staple of many religious practitioners — of every religion — for centuries and by now hundreds of thousands of people have done it with no ill effect. The master cleanse, in particular, may not be suitable for diabetics, however.
I prefer the master cleanse to other detoxes because of it’s simplicity and because I can control exactly what goes into my body. It is, however, a quick and sometimes harsh detox because of the speed at which toxins are released from the body, compared to other detoxes that are slower and more gentle which use herbs and other supplements to slowly draw the toxins out. I’d have some concerns with the slower methods unless I had complete faith in the person or company who was providing the supplements for the detox (e.g. the use of non-organic herbs seems counterintuitive to me on a detox).
At any rate, if you feel better doing it, then ignore the naysayers. I applaud your open mind and willingness to try different methods of taking control of your own health instead of blindly following the masses to the pharmacy. Good luck on the rest of your detox!
posted by Michelle on 9-1-2007 at 4:16 pm
I’d love it if anyone could say, specifically, what the ‘toxins’ are and where they are supposed to be coming from in your liver.
posted by Foobeat on 9-1-2007 at 5:33 pm
Your liver is working overtime detoxing AFTER you STOP drinking????
Your liver works overtime WHILE YOU ARE DRINKING to rid the poison of alcohol from your system. Alcoholic liver disease (i.e., your liver working overtime) comes from ALCOHOL -NOT from NOT drinking alcohol.
posted by Zach on 9-2-2007 at 7:42 am
Foobeat, let me ask you a question. If someone could prove to you that the cells in your body retain toxins and release them during a fast or a detox, would you try doing it? If not, then it seems your only purpose is to belittle other people for doing something with which you don’t agree. It’s a free country; have at it, if it floats your boat. It’s my right to wonder out loud about your motivation. It’s also my right to fast and detox without obtaining your approval beforehand.
Also, to directly answer your question, someone would have to have a tissue sample of their liver taken before and after a detox to determine which compounds are no longer present. The body does retain compounds that are not conducive to good health. If you’ve ever watched CSI or any other crime-solving drama, those are the traces of whatever-the-substance-of-the-week-is that killed that episode’s victim. Or talk to a real life coroner.
The liver is a filtering mechanism in the body for many things, not just alcohol. One of its job is to prevent harmful compounds from entering the blood stream, to protect the rest of the body. What do you think happens to the stuff that gets filtered out? Some is eliminated through urine, feces, and, believe or not, sweat. The theory behind detoxing is that not all the bad stuff is eliminated this way and that over time it accumulates in the cells of the liver which leads to a person exhibiting a variety of different symptoms (which vary by person) such as fatigue, rashes, allergies, and inflammation, to name a few.
If you’re truly interested in the existence and elimination of toxins in the human body through fasting or a detox, please volunteer to donate your tissue before and after a fast or detox. I’m positive you’ll find some researchers willing and eager to take you up on your offer. Personally, I’m comfortable knowing that I do feel better after a fast (even though I sometimes feel crummy during it) and I’m not doing any further harm to my body. I do prefer to keep my body tissues more or less intact so I won’t be volunteering for any studies of the efficacy of detoxing.
posted by Michelle on 9-2-2007 at 1:04 pm
Oh my goodness. I thought this article was a joke. After reading the comments, I’m terrified to realize people take this stuff seriously. Footbeat, I’m with you on this. Your liver’s going to eliminate “toxins” no matter if you’re “detoxing” or not. The liver is only attached to blood vessels and the small intestines (not counting the gallbladder) and isn’t connected to sweat glands.
And CSI isn’t real science, either. I’m sorry, but I get real worked up about pseudoscience and new-age rip-offs, too.
posted by allison on 9-2-2007 at 4:59 pm
People are so funny, yeah in a perfect world where all we eat and drink were organic. If the air didn’t have pollution, if the vinyl siding on a house wasn’t cancer causing, then yes, we wouldn’t need to help our body detox. Our body was made to handle natural toxins, not man made. That’s okay most people will get cancer in their lives a few times, just a fact. Maybe the link between cancer and man made toxins will be made maybe not. Until then I’ll cleanse and poo like no other and I will feel energized. How many people feel energized on a daily basis after their mood enhancers.
posted by scabs on 9-3-2007 at 10:52 am
scabs, “That’s okay most people will get cancer in their lives a few times, just a fact.”
Just a fact?
I am amazed at how easily so many people can state something as “fact” that can’t possibly be backed up. Have you absolutely no sense of intellectual integrity?
posted by McCoolivan on 9-3-2007 at 1:25 pm
“[your] acupuncturist confirmed”… how?
“that [your] liver started working overtime after [you] stopped drinking” a reduction in matter needing to be filtered results in an increased filtering mechanism?
Finally, what is a toxin, and how do cleanses work on a scientific level?
posted by Scott on 9-3-2007 at 3:37 pm
Oy. Quick clarification: when I said my liver was working overtime, I really should have said my liver qi (i.e. energy, prana). The Eastern-Western medicine debate is not a new one, and I don’t anticipate it will be extinguished anytime soon. I’m really not here to convince you of it, nor to dissuade you from it, just to share my experiences.
Unfortunately, the acupuncturists I frequent don’t have detox articles to which I can link–but of the three I’ve been to off and on for the last five years, all have had the same reaction when I come in with symptoms I develop after beginning some detox. They all say:
ACUPUNCTURISTS: your liver (& its meridian) has a lot of yang (heat).
ME: but why? i stopped drinking!
ACUPUNCTURISTS: any cessation/influx of energy will affect your qi, and how your body navigates that qi. the body does its best to maintain proper health, given the toxins you’re dealing with. when you’re on a particular drug, or drinking, or otherwise overly taxing your liver, your liver qi produces excess yang; however, should you maintain a consistent “abuse” of your liver, the rest of your meridians will make room for this excess heat (just as you can develop a hearty tolerance for booze by consistent happy hours) & you might not have any overt symptoms.
Once you stop drinking, your liver still has work to do: it cleans up the party, thereby generating more heat. I’m not an acupuncturist, so I can’t measure the ways in which this detox heat is different from the liver-taxation heat, but all I know is that my liver heat was normal before I stopped drinking, and elevated afterwards.
I’m not saying acupuncture has saved my life, but I’m a fan of the Eastern approach to most things–not in exclusion to any savory Western developments, as I’m a syncretist, but I’m also a practicing Buddhist, so I like a medical philosophy that is based on causality and doesn’t just issue indictments based on conspicuous symptoms. Plus, like almost 16% of the US population (data as of ‘06), I don’t have health insurance, so I like to participate in some semblance of investing in a balanced, healthy corpus!
posted by Becky on 9-3-2007 at 6:14 pm
I must say that I’m very disappointed in this post. I come to mentalfloss.com for facts - to “feel smart again,” as the tagline goes. Instead, I received a crock of unproven myths about acupuncturists and liver detox. The process of “master cleanse” has never been shown to do anything but be unhealthy for the consumer because of lack of vitamins and nutrients, and perhaps cause him or her to lose weight. What exactly gives an acupuncturist expertise on the liver, anyhow? Perhaps see a liver specialist on that.
posted by Abi on 9-4-2007 at 12:34 am
Sense: Care to state your sources on whether acupuncturists are, as you say, ‘QUACKS’?
Because I am walking, talking proof
that they AREN’T. I didn’t go into more detail about the situation for brevity’s sake, but I feel I must elaborate now.
The house that I live in was built, to be blunt, like crap. They laid the stairs before they poured the foundation, the bottom of which is connected to my bedroom. That, and a shoddy plumbing job crated a breeding ground for a dangerous mold that has been proven many times over to be dangerous for humans (seeing as moisture + exposure = MOLD). This has led to a plethora of symptoms that were seemingly not connected and where seperately and unsucessfully treated by the well-learned physicians of our famously deteriorating health care system. I was treated for debilitatingly painful menstrual cramps from my first period with suggestions of ibuprofen and a heating pad. I would scratch my legs raw from a srange incessant itching that no one could explain, and my overall well-being was circling the drain.
Withing ten whole minutes of meeting the acupuncturist, who had only heard a little of my symptoms from my mother she knew what was wrong with me, what was causing it, and how to fix it. She asked questions the doctors didn’t ask and made me healthy again by CARING, not just treating.
Yes, her treatments and supplements cost a lot, but I’m a hundred times better than I was before I started. Besides, many long-term medical treatments are notoriously expensive and many have a much greater chance of doing more harm than good than alternative medicine.
The thing that few people understand is that acupuncturists actually listen to the human body instead of relying on regulations and synthetic treatments and make the body work as a harmonious system as it should.
Sense, I really hope you become more open-minded about practices that have been successfully helping people for thousands of years, you may be pleasantly surprised.
posted by heather on 9-4-2007 at 12:42 am
to all the haters of acupuncture: never had it, don’t have much interest in it, yadda yadda yadda.
but: if you’re that interested in the scientific merits of the stated theory, go visit this friend of mine i call “google” and see what you can find rather than post your “equally” half-assed counter theories.
or: for anyone who has witnessed first hand the detox process of alcohol leaving the brain — let alone the liver, that organ that transmutates its deleterious effects — i’ll be damned if you can claim that it is not working overtime.
alcohol affects each of us differently. it is a chemical composition unfamiliar to either the brain or the basic evolution of man (if you are to believe in such things, which, perhaps you aren’t) and as such its effects are not to be judged across the board but individually.
that said (and yes, whether you like it or not, agreed upon) one cannot deny that the liver, let alone the bloodstream and the brain, undergo a serious state of withdrawal once unhooked from that chemical.
you can deny it if you want, and you can chalk it up to your perfectly logical rejection of the hocus-pocus of “homeopathic” medicine all you like, but like alcohol you will only find yourself — if you can detox long enough — lying to yourself.
the liver works overtime to reacclimate itself to its more purified state. think about it or google it, but a simple form of logical reasoning will avail you of the obvious.
posted by eeyore on 9-4-2007 at 12:51 am
heather,I didn’t mean my comment as a personal attack on you. I don’t claim to have all the answers but I am very suspicious of people and professions who say they do. There are many things I’m open minded about. I was even open minded about acupuncture at one point but once I learned more about it I came to the conclusion that it’s sheer quackery. That’s my opinion. I shouldn’t have to cite a specific source to voice an opinion.
posted by Sense on 9-4-2007 at 3:26 am
I am currently looking into detox options. I have serious addictions to both caffine and nicotine and would like to quit both.
I spoke with my doctor. He wanted to put me on drugs that would cost me several hundred dollars per month.
When I said I couldn’t afford it, he told me that was the only thing that would work.
I’m willing to try just about anything that will help me get through this process faster. If detox is it, then great! Rather than giving my money to large pharmeceutical companies, I can patronize local businesses. :)
posted by Tru on 9-4-2007 at 8:52 am
Maybe you should get medical advice from your doctor instead of your quack acupuncturist and fad detox books.
posted by Zach on 9-4-2007 at 9:54 am
My, my, this topic certainly engenders strong feelings doesn’t it?
Personally, I think it’s foolish to dismiss practices that have been developed and perfected over millenia.
That said, the fields of acupuncture and naturopathic medicines are somewhat of an under-regulated free-for-all, and some practictioners do take advantage of their patients. Those greedy bastards unfortunately overshadow the work of people who truly want to help and heal.
As for detox, I’m undecided. Too little empirical evidence one way or another.
posted by natlynn on 9-4-2007 at 11:31 am
allison,
Granted, the liver is not attached to the sweat glands directly. However, sweat, as well as urine, is formed when the blood plasma is filtered. This removes waste products (or toxins, as some prefer to call them) from the plasma. The primary function of sweating is to cool the body, but it does play a small but important role in waste removal as well.
posted by MichelleR on 9-4-2007 at 12:56 pm
sense
can’t wait till your children’s children talk about how failed the pill popping generation was and how it was driven by confused fall in liners who were born and raised to be consumers in a system full of people who used cute words like quackery to exercise their confusion and right to an opinion
hooray for treating ones own body as a temple and attempting to step outside of the non-sense and try and make sense of the things our body’s try and tell us everyday
posted by thequack on 9-5-2007 at 2:11 pm
Thank you, but I won’t be having any children, which means they won’t have any children who’ll be sitting around dissing the failings and diction of my generation. Woo, glad I nipped that in the bud.
posted by sense on 9-5-2007 at 11:05 pm
Sense so are we…
posted by John on 3-13-2008 at 7:15 pm