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Jason English
My Trip To Old Faithful (Not That Old Faithful)
by Jason English - September 14, 2007 - 9:46 AM

geyser.jpgEarlier this summer, my wife and I journeyed westward to California – San Diego, San Francisco and Napa Valley. On the last day of our trip, for two reasons, we required an alcohol-free activity. First, we were pretty wine-tasted out. And second, I had to drive our PT Cruiser convertible 67 miles back to rental car return.

We saw a sign pointing the way to Old Faithful. For about ten seconds, my hungover geography would have made Miss South Carolina cringe. Is Old Faithful really in California? Why wouldn’t anyone mention Napa Valley’s proximity to Yellowstone?

Wait, there are two Old Faithfuls?

There are indeed. Since we’d never seen a geyser and had eight hours to kill, we put down the top and (PT) cruised toward Calistoga. Here’s what we saw.

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Aside from the liberal use of quotation marks, the sign alerted us to the presence of special goats we hadn’t expected. I still don’t understand their connection to geysers. But it’s a fun diversion for the kids, right?

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“With a Fainting goat in the herd if coyotes or dogs threatened the sheep, the sheep could run away while the Fainting goat fell over, providing the predator with an easy meal while the sheep escaped.”

This petting zoo was PG-13.

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“They have a genetic problem with relaxing muscles. When they are startled or surprised their muscles lock up and the goat then sometimes falls over.”

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Confused and slightly horrified, we moved on. Though at least we were safe should coyotes attack.

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We sat and we waited, not even sure we were looking the right way.

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We absolutely were.

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After a few minutes staring at the water, we took turns having our pictures taken. I’m glad we made the trip. But to steal (and bastardize) a line from Aaron Sorkin, the length of the geyser was way out of proportion to our interest in it. We hit up the snack shop and headed for the Pacific Coast Highway, the long and scenic way back to the airport.

No fainting goat chew toy for Bailey, but we did get her a special Napa souvenir.

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A souvenir she destroyed in roughly 30 minutes.

A few links and we’ll call it a post:
• More info on fainting goats.
• The Old Faithful Geyser (of California) website.
• The PT Cruiser convertible.

Comments (11)
  1. The chickens there at the geyser like Ritz crackers with Cheese-Whiz. They follow you around, stalking you and your picnic lunch, clucking for some of your cheesy goodness. You can run, but you can’t hide from the chickens of the geyser.
    I went there a couple of years back after we’d just moved to Sonoma and sadly, my traveling companions did not heed my warning to not sit downwind. The car trip home was very… sulphuric.

  2. “These goats were close to extinction by the 1980s”

    Hmmm, I wonder why?

  3. Fainting Goats? I’ve heard of narcoleptic in-bred dogs, but the goats cracked me up…

  4. i saw a thing about the goats on inside edition (yes, i admit to watching that trash. lol BUT, i only have 3 tv channels and there’s nothign else of interest on)
    i thought it was pretty funny and was wonderign why people would keep these things.
    the whole diversion for sheep thing was a little startling (the goat instead of the sheep getting it AGAIN. lol), but now that i know they have extra meat than a real goat makes it more understandable.

    that was pretty cool.

  5. I am still mad at my husband that we could not go. But since we had just been taken, between Napa and Sanoma for the Petrified Forest, he was not going for it.

    I still crack up to this day.

  6. “There are only 3 old faithfuls in the world” it says on the CA old faithful site. Where’s the 3rd? I kind of checked Wikipedia, and that was the pathetic extent of my fruitless search.

    Oh yea!.. lol.

  7. where does the aaron sorkin quote come from?

  8. I know someone who had a Fainting Goat, but could not scare it into fainting. We were later told this goat was a female and only male goats faint.

  9. that’s so not fair. i’ve never seen a fainting goat, but i would line up for that.

    as for the real old faithful. it was ‘mehhh…’. but they had ice cream while you waited! and that was pretty sweet.

    (you see what i did there? you see that? that was a play on words… i know!)

  10. There was an episode of Dirty Jobs with the fainting goats, (but i think the farm they were filming at was on the east coast)
    According to the show the fainting goats were mixed in with a more valuable breed and if perchance the heard was attacked the fainting goats would do there job and faint and be breakfast or lunch, it was a good episode and of course Mike Rowe was awesome

  11. when i saw “fainting goats” i got excited because they used to always have them at fairs in tennessee. i want one.

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