Every Friday, I post a series of unrelated questions meant to spark conversation in the comments. Answer one, answer all, respond to someone else’s reply, whatever you want. Very casual. On to this week’s topics of discussion…

1. A couple years ago, I posted a quick guide to naming schools. I’m still waiting for the freelance school-naming projects to start rolling in. But last week I received an email from the principal of a new school opening in Happy Valley, Oregon, called Verne A. Duncan Elementary. The school needs a nickname. Any suggestions? They want something unique and tied to the region. (Anyone know anything about Happy Valley, Oregon?) I’ll send all your suggestions to the school’s principal. Perhaps you’ll be able to add “School Nickname Provider” to your resume.

2. I like to ask this question at least once a year. We all have colorful stories of terrible customer service. The most satisfying thing I’ve ever written was a running diary of my battles with Sprint Customer Care in 2007, which I posted on YesButNoButYes.com and led to the removal of a bogus $630 charge that had magically appeared on my bill. But I want to hear stories of good customer service. Have you had any restored-your-faith-in-humanity experiences with a company that treated you well?

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Every Friday, I post a series of unrelated questions meant to spark conversation in the comments. Answer one, answer all, respond to someone else’s reply, whatever you want. It’s casual. On to this week’s topics of discussion…

1. I recently found myself in a “Wow, am I really doing this?” moment at Stop & Shop, and not in a good or exciting way—I was returning grapes.

During my three-year stint as an A&P cashier (and Tuesday Night Front End Manager), I would have ridiculed anyone who returned produce moments after purchasing it. But these grapes were not sufficiently seedless. In fact, they were quite seedful, which ran counter to the packaging, on which the word “seedless” appeared in two languages. I received a full refund and was not asked to pay for the three grapes I’d already eaten. Big win for Team English.

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever returned? (Or the weirdest reason you’ve given for returning something?)

2. What’s your last “Wow, am I really doing this?” moment?

3. The quirky neighbor is a sitcom staple. Eddie Haskel, Skippy Handelman, Steve Urkel—it’s practically a requirement of the genre. If you could have one sitcom neighbor move into the house, apartment or dorm room next door, who would you pick (and why)?

4. And for our weekly end-of-the-decade question, what was the best band to form and break up since 2000? (Or if that’s too hard, the best band to break up since 2000.)

[See all the previous Friday Happy Hour transcripts.]

Every Friday, I post a series of unrelated questions meant to spark conversation in the comments. Answer one, answer all, respond to someone else’s reply, whatever you want. It’s casual. On to this week’s topics of discussion…

1. As we approach the end of the aughts, a lot of people are asking this question: what was the best movie of the decade? I need some time on this one.

2. Twice this week I found five-dollar bills while walking my dog. (I enlisted your help in deciding how to spend it; I’ll have a follow-up post on that later today Monday.) What’s the best/weirdest/most unbelievable thing you’ve ever found?

3. Last week, we looked back in Time Magazine’s cover archives to see what was in the news the week you were born. If you’re a sports fan, you can do the same thing with Sports Illustrated (click here, then search by year). When I came into the world, SI was celebrating Sebastian Coe’s 3:49 mile. And if you were born this decade, you can play the same game with mental_floss magazine back issues.

4. What’s something you did for the first time this summer?

5. I’m going to throw in a “What’s the best ________ of the decade?” question each week. What are some other things you’d like to hear people weigh in on? Non-fiction book? New stamp? Technological advancement?

Every Friday, I post a series of unrelated questions meant to spark conversation in the comments. Answer one, answer all, respond to someone else’s reply, whatever you want. It’s casual. On to this week’s topics of discussion…

1. I was searching for a story in Time Magazine’s archives when I got sucked in—”Find Your Birthday Cover!” They had me at the exclamation point.

My birthday cover (July 30, 1979) featured an empty conference room. At first I thought it must have been a slow news week. But according to the cover story, I was born on the heels of “the most extraordinary week in the White House since Richard Nixon resigned in 1974.” I didn’t remember this chapter in American history.

What happened was this: With polls showing Americans had lost confidence in their country and their leader, President Jimmy Carter demanded the resignations of his top 34 Cabinet members and staff aides, then purged everyone he deemed disloyal or ineffective. This was meant to rejuvenate the Carter administration 15 months before the 1980 election. Carter would lose that campaign to Ronald Reagan by a wide electoral margin, 489-49. Maybe that’s why the great shakeup isn’t talked about much anymore.

For our purposes, the question is this: what was the big news story the week you were born? You can use Time’s cover search.

2. The remaking of what movie would anger you the most?

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1. Congratulations! You’ve been awarded a scholarship to pursue any advanced degree or training you’d like, plus the necessary housing considerations, a meal allowance, a job for your significant other in your new city, well-credentialed babysitters, etc. Where would you go, and what would you study?

2. Earlier this week, Mangesh and I attended the launch party for Afar magazine (we’re pictured here looking a little confused during the capoeira performance). I’ve heard the story of our actual launch party—a ‘Wine & Cheetos’ affair held in a space that did not allow alcohol, thus making it a ‘& Cheetos’ affair. I think a re-launch party is in order. If we hired you to plan a mental_floss (9th-anniversary-of-the-first) launch party, what would that look like? Where would it be? What would we eat? Which C-list celebrities would you convince to attend?

3. If you were given the power to change just one thing about your current job, what would it be? Don’t say “more money” or “more vacation time.” Everyone wants that.

4. What’s one food you’ve tried to like, but just can’t bring yourself to eat it?

1. I have come to the realization that everyone has one (and usually only one) good story about flying with a strange, abusive or inebriated passenger. Mine involved a woman who kept tapping a young mom on the shoulder, repeatedly begging her to support her daughter’s love of art. (The daughter was about 5 and had a coloring book.) While we were waiting to exit the plane, the now-loaded lady made one last plea: “I wanted to be an artist and my parents never gave me any support and now I’m a stripper and my life sucks.” Color away, kids.

What’s your best worst-airline-passenger story?

2. This morning I heard someone on the radio refer to Cindy Margolis as “The Most Downloaded Woman on the Internet” (or maybe “the Planet”), a curious title she’s inexplicably held for at least a decade. How often are we updating these rankings? (That’s not the question.) What are some nicknames that need to be retired?

3. It’s been the summer of celebrity guest editors in the magazine world, highlighted by Stephen Colbert’s issue of Newsweek and the Mythbusters guys taking over Popular Mechanics. If mental_floss magazine was going to go this route, what celebrity would be the best choice?

4. What TV show’s return are you most looking forward to? My official answer is Big Love, but Flipping Out, the Bravo reality show about the obsessive-compulsive house-flipper, was a close second. And I’m getting pumped for the Seinfeld reunion on Curb Your Enthusiasm. Let’s just call it a three-way tie.

Shoot, I forgot 30 Rock. Four-way it is.

[See all the previous Friday Happy Hour transcripts.]

1. As I made very clear yesterday, July 30th is my birthday. A quick scan of a few “This Date in History” sites reveals a few notable events: Arnold Schwarzenegger was born, Jimmy Hoffa disappeared, and, at least according to Wikipedia, Baghdad was founded. What’s the most impressive thing to happen on your birthday?

2. What’s your second-favorite quote from your favorite movie?

3. I once took a vacation day to clean up the residue from a fire extinguisher that my wife had to use on our flaming oven. It was a mess and really did take most of the day to clean, but I’m sure my boss thought the whole ordeal was made up. What’s the strangest real reason you had to miss work? (And if you want to share your best fake excuse, that’d be even better.)

4. Full disclosure: This one might help us with an article we’re working on for next week. Mangesh is reading a book called Picking Cotton about a woman who misidentified the man who raped her, put him in jail for 11 years until DNA proved him innocent, and now they’re really good friends. Can you think of any other unexpected or bizarre friendships or partnerships in history?

[See all the previous Friday Happy Hour transcripts.]

1. For six weeks in 2002, I worked as a temporary receptionist at a garage door installation company. The actual employees would all leave for sales or service calls around 7:30, and I’d stay behind to answer urgent calls from frantic customers.

“My garage door isn’t working and I have a huge meeting this morning! Tell me how to get my car out!” / “My garage door just landed on my windshield. There’s glass everywhere and I cut my heel. You know you’re paying for all this, right?”

No matter the issue, my response was always the same: “I’ll have someone give you a call this afternoon.” I don’t think that satisfied even one customer.

While this was a good place to watch season one of The Sopranos on my laptop, I certainly wouldn’t call it my dream temp job. Here are a few candidates for that honor: 1. Seat-filler at an awards show (preferably the Golden Globes, Oscars or Emmys, but if it’s a work-your-way-up kind of thing, I’d work the Grammys); 2. Naming consultant, with a focus on pets, children and paint colors (I wouldn’t want to go through all the headaches of starting the business, but if someone had already established one, I’d gladly sit in and namestorm with people about their puppies, babies or vibrant reds); 3. Segway-riding tour guide (what we’re touring doesn’t matter). What’s your dream temp job?

2. My daughter turned 1 last week, and tomorrow is her big first birthday party. I don’t think we’ve gone too overboard—no live elephants or dunk tanks this year. What’s your most memorable children’s birthday party experience? Doesn’t have to be your party—could be one you attended as a child, or your kid’s party, or a party your kid attended.

3. The New York Mets have been in the news this week after team executive Tony Bernazard allegedly ripped off his shirt and challenged their minor league affiliate to a fight. What’s the craziest on-the-job behavior you’ve ever witnessed?

[See all the previous Friday Happy Hour transcripts.]

1. My wife (then fiancée) Ellen bought me TiVo for Christmas in 2003. That very TiVo is still in operation, which is great, because she bought me the lifetime service contract to go with it. I was just scrolling through the list of programs and realized there’s some rather old stuff in my queue — the complete second season of Da Ali G Show originally recorded in 2004; a 2003 episode of Animal Planet’s K-9-to-5 that must have held special meaning to my 24-year-old self; and the impromptu postgame show Mike Francesa & Christopher “Mad Dog” Russo hosted on NBC after the New York Giants’ improbable win in Super Bowl XLII. One of these days, I’ll preserve these on DVD. Or come to my senses and clear some hard drive space. What’s the oldest program saved on your DVR?

2. In that TiVo box came a TiVo decal. “What a weird thing to give us,” I remarked. “Who would put the TiVo logo on their car?” Later that day, Ellen defiantly affixed the TiVo decal to our Camry. I thought that was a bold and funny gesture, and I’ve been driving around with it ever since. What’s the best, worst or most embarrassing bumper sticker or decal you’ve ever put on your car? (Alternate question: What’s the most ridiculous bumper sticker you’ve ever seen?)

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1. I love the Seinfeld episode where Jerry goes through the contents of George’s gigantic wallet (”Show this card at any participating Orlando-area Exxon station to get your free ‘Save the Tiger’ poster.”) While I’m not storing any Sweet & Low with my credit cards, I do carry some non-essentials: a one-way Chatham, NJ-to-Penn Station train ticket from 2004; half of an expired Costco card (the half without the metallic strip); and a red/green “More please”/”I’m full” card given to me by a waiter at the Texas de Brazil steakhouse in Aruba on my honeymoon. Just in case.

How about you? What’s the weirdest (or oldest) thing you’re carrying around in your wallet or purse?

If you’ve got a camera handy, take a picture of your odd item and email it to flossypics@gmail.com. We’ll put together a gallery.

2. I get the most boring mail. I can’t remember the last time something arrived that I was genuinely excited about. (College acceptance letters? The AARP card that was mistakenly sent to me when I was 25?) I’m not counting random stuff I order online, since I always know that’s en route. I mean a ‘Wow, you won’t believe what came in the mail today!’ letter.

I do have the big 3-0 coming up later this month (on the big 3-0), so maybe my postal luck will change. What’s the last piece of truly exciting mail you received?

3. My mom emailed me this story about Jack Boyle, a guy who left $152,000 to the Ohio insurance company where he worked from 1953-1978. According to his will, the money was left “in gratitude for my livelihood in their employ, and good pension in retirement.” Quite the company man. If you were revising your will today, what would you leave to your current employer?

4. And here’s this week’s ‘Do you like movies about gladiators?’ kind of question: Have you ever been to a book signing? Who was the author? Good experience? Waste of time?

[See all the previous Friday Happy Hour transcripts.]