Today’s first archival tidbit comes from Scatterbrained:

At 48 minutes, Andy Warhol’s experimental film “Kiss” is easily the longest picture about kissing: It consists of one static shot, 12 real-life couples, four minutes each. We’re still waiting for his sequel, “Second Base.”

I have a bike and I love riding it. Trouble is, my bike hates me — I don’t have enough room for it in my tiny house, so it sits outside, and there’s only so much that plastic covers and occasional coatings of WD-40 can do; as a result, it’s getting kinda rusty. Enter the miracle cure for those who are both eco- and square-footage-conscious: folding bikes. The one pictured here is called the Locust, and even though it’s just a prototype at this point, there are many cool folding bikes out there that you can get right now for around $200. (None quite as cool-looking [if a little Seussian] as the Locust, however.)

Check out more folding bikes, after the jump …
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Last month we posted about minimum purchase requirements for credit card users. Consumers were empowered, small business owners enraged. One of our readers proudly admitted charging $.17 at Kinko’s. Another comment, this one by Vic, posed a not yet answered question about Kinko’s:

“As long as this is a triva site, and we’ve moved to the subject of Kinko’s, when I was a college student in the ’70s I used to get copies at the ORIGINAL Kinko’s. Anyone (else) know where that was? Or why it is called Kinko’s?”

Since we all seem stumped, I used my phone-a-friend (Wikipedia):

The company was founded in 1970 by Paul Orfalea, whose nickname was “Kinko” because of his kinky (curly) hair. The original copy shop was founded in the college community of Isla Vista next to the campus of the University of California, Santa Barbara.

One last link. Kinko’s (sorry, FedEx Kinko’s) was recently fodder for an online game called Disaffected!, created by Persuasive Games (“Disaffected! gives the player the chance to step into the demotivated position of real FedEx Kinko’s employees. Feel the indifference of these purple-shirted malcontents first-hand, and consider the possible reasons behind their malaise.”)

New Scientist magazine is reporting that a Madagascar moth has been discovered drinking the tears of sleeping birds. The phenomenon isn’t totally unheard of as other species of moths tend to drink the tears of other, larger creatures (like crocodile, deer, and other animals that can’t brush them away). This is the first time, however, that the insects have been monitored not only drinking the tears of birds– for salt, apparently– but also using their strange harpoon like tongues to anchor and pry open a sleeping bird’s eye. What’s most fascinating, is that the bird doesn’t seem to know what’s happening, leading scientists to question whether the moths are using an anaesthetic as part of their operation. You can read more here on the phenomenon at New Scientist.

Worth1000 has a pretty great photoshopping contest today involving what Santa does in his time off. Bullfighting, playing with guns, and performing ballet are just a few of the images captured. Click here to view more.

Call them “body modification artists.” Building on yesterday’s theme, which all started with us thinking too much about the body-modified Mayans depicted in Apocalypto, we wanted to get down to brass tacks (no, that’s not a body mod) and meet a few celebrities. Of the body modification world, that is.

The Enigma

For years a part of Jim Rose’s traveling circus, he’s a professional freak (his own words) and musician who has covered his body in blue puzzle-shaped tattoos, sports “horn implants” and performs all manner of sideshow stunts, from sword-swallowing to fire breathing.

Katzen the Tiger Lady
A bandmate (and until recently, wife) of the Enigma, she wears full-body tattoos as well as cat whiskers attached via transdermal implants on her face. “Katzen,” she’ll have you know, is German for “cats.”

Stalking Cat

As catlike as Katzen may be, she doesn’t hold a candle to Stalking Cat, an American Indian whose devotion to body modification and catliness is unchallenged. Reportedly beginning his body modifications after a conversation with an Indian chief who counseled him to “follow the way of the tiger,” Stalking’s body boasts

• extensive tattooing, including facial tattooing
• hairline modification
• facial transdermal implants to allow the wearing of whiskers
• facial subdermal implants to change the shape of the brow and forehead
• filing and capping of his teeth to have a more feline appearance
• wearing green contact lenses with slit irises
• having his ears surgically pointed
• silicone injection in the lips, cheeks, chin and other parts of his face
• and a bifurcated upper lip.

Lucky “Diamond” Rich

Of course, no list of celebrated body modifiers would be complete without Lucky “Diamond” Rich, who claims the Guinness Book’s dubious honor of being the world’s most tattooed person, with ink covering his entire body, including the inside of his mouth and ears. And despite being a blue man, as far as we know he has never been associated with the Blue Man Group.

Senator Tim Johnson (D) is still on the mend after his brain surgery last week. Though his doctors say he’s doing well, there’s still no telling how long he’ll be “out of the office.”

But as you’ve probably heard, he really can’t be fired for taking too many sick days. Nine Senators have had to take extended leaves of absence since 1942.

From CNN.com, we get the skinny on all of them (and it’s kind of interesting to note how many are democrats):

1. Styles Bridges – 1942: The New Hampshire Republican broke his hip when he fell December 31, 1941. He returned to office after missing several months.
2. Carter Glass 1942-1946: Despite being president pro tempore and chairman of the Appropriations Committee, the Virginia Democrat missed almost four years because of various age-related ailments. He died before he could return to office.
3. Robert F. Wagner 1947-1949: Wagner, a Democrat from New York, resigned after a heart problem caused him to miss more than two years. He couldn’t attend any session in the 80th or 81st Congresses.
4. Arthur H. Vandenberg 1949-1951: The Michigan Republican came back for two months after having a tumor removed from his lung in October 1949. He left to have surgery again in April 1950, and he returned briefly the next month. But he left a third time and never returned. He died in April 1951.
5. Clair Engle 1963-1964: Brain cancer left this California Democrat partially paralyzed, and he missed various periods because of his operations. In June 1964, he was carried into the Senate chamber to cast his vote on the Civil Rights Act. He had to signal “affirmative” because he couldn’t talk. He died the next month.
6. Karl Earl Mundt 1969-1973: Mundt suffered a stroke in November 1969 but didn’t resign until his term ended in January 1973. The South Dakota Republican wanted his wife to serve in his stead, but the state’s governor refused to appoint her.
7. Joseph R. Biden Jr. – 1988: The Democrat from Delaware had a brain aneurysm in February 1988. Almost seven months later, he returned to office.
8. Albert Gore Jr. – 1989: Gore took almost a full month off when his 4-year-old son was seriously injured in a car accident. The Tennessee Democrat and his wife stayed with their son until he was released from the hospital.
9. David Pryor – 1991: The Democrat from Arkansas had a heart attack in April 1991. He returned in September.

*since 1942

Tis the holiday season, and the Hunter is swimming in nostalgia. He remembers the fresh snow falling on a Los Angeles Christmas morn. He remembers running downstairs to see what Santa had delivered during his fitful slumber. He also remembers that he was, in fact, Jewish and had received his presents earlier in the month, meaning that Christmas Day would bring little more than a matinee at the AMC followed by some Moo Shoo Pork. (Which, incidentally, never failed to be delicious.)

Oh well. As the Hunter’s parents used to say: There’s always Sukkot. But, thing is, the Hunter wanted to get you guys something nice for the holidays. Some particularly choice videos. That’s when it dawned on him…a compilation of the best Sportscenter advertisements. There really are too many to choose from, so if you feel the list to be incomplete, post some more in the comments section. In the meantime, though, find someone you love, get cozy under a warm blanket, and enjoy.

First off, Michael Buffer leads us into the Sportscenter offices:

Another lobby video, this time with Grant Hill and Dan Patrick fighting off a case of the post-show blues:

These two are classic Charlie Steiner performances — and the first one showcases Andrew Shue in his last (and only?) moment of greatness:

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Today’s archival tidbit comes from volume 5, issue 3 (May/June 2006):

A “haboob” is a moist, hot wind in the Sahara Desert that often accompanies thunderstorms. Haboobs stir up huge quantities of sand and move across the desert in the form of a dense wall that can reach heights up to 3,000 feet. You’d probably learn this kind of stuff in school if anyone could say “haboob” without giggling.

YOU WILL NEED
Some Llamas

Step 1: Recognize the Awesomeness That is the Llama
Push those vile stereotypes out of your mind. Llamas are more than just South America’s walking sweater. For one thing, they jump—many reaching Jordan-like heights of as much as four feet. They also make excellent golf caddies and scientists have developed a way to make a dandruff control treatment out of the llama’s immune system.

Step 2: Draw Blood From Several Of Your New Furry Friends
Then head to the lab. You’re on the hunt for llama antibodies. Complex proteins that float freely through the bloodstream of almost every animal, antibodies recognize, and clamp onto, anything that isn’t supposed to be inside the body–sort of like a tiny, biological car boot. Antibodies serve as a signal to immune cells, attracting them to the intruder. If they’ve encountered this particular invader before, antibodies can actually neutralize it themselves. And scientists have found that they can manipulate antibodies into locating, identifying, and destroying other things as well—like cancer cells, dangerous microbes, and toxic chemicals. The problem, antibodies don’t fare so well outside of a body. In high temperatures they quickly break down and become useless.

Step 3: Convert the Blood Into a Bio-Weapon Defense System
In December of 2006, scientists at the U.S. Naval Research Laboratory announced that they had found a way to get around the problem of inconveniently delicate antibodies. That’s right, it’s llamas. Turns out, the antibodies found in llamas (and sharks and camels, too…but they aren’t as cute) are about one-tenth the size of human antibodies and significantly less complex of in structure. But, this simplicity and small stature also makes them more durable. Llama antibodies can survive temperatures as a high as 200 degrees F and researchers were able to train them into identifying some of the diseases likely to be used as WMDs: cholera, smallpox, and the toxin ricin. The hope is that, with a little more work, we’ll be able to pack thousands of llama antibodies into a sensor that could send out a red-alert of biological attack, long before anybody actually got sick.

Photo is courtesy Generally Awesome and, in this context, is meant to depict an elite squad of llama Homeland Security agents parachuting in to save the day.