I’ve been trying to lay off the sauce lately – I’m training for a half marathon and alcohol really hampers my efforts (even just a pint or two). But it’s been tough – I have four weekends in a row that are drinking occasions. The first was a class reunion, the second was a Jimmy Buffett concert, this weekend we’re going to Lollapalooza (although I’m not sure I can afford to drink there) and the weekend after is a birthday party for my husband. Needless to say, my willpower has been tested. So you might understand why I was intrigued by the St. Petersburg Times‘ list of Best Beer Names. Do you agree with them? Let us know in the comments.

10 Best Beer Names

10. Unibroue La Fin Du Monde. Mmm, End of the World Beer.
9. Harveistoun Old Engine Oil. Whatever it takes, I guess.
8. Sweetwater Happy Ending Imperial Stout. I’m going to guess that this Happy Ending is cheaper than its namesake.
7. Ridgeway Santa’s Butt. Because nothing makes me want to drink like Santa’s plumber’s crack.
6. Buffalo Bill’s Alimony Ale. The Times says this company bills Alimony Ale as the “bitterest beer in America”.
5. Dogfish Head Golden Shower. This one was only on the market under this name for a short period of time; it was subsequently renamed Golden Era.
4. Mikkeller Beer Geek Breakfast Pooh Coffee.
3. McQuire’s I’ll Have What The Gentleman On The Floor Is Having Barley Wine. I wonder if you can just say, “Can I have the IHWTGOTFIHBW?”
2. Avery Collaboration Not Litigation
1. Wasatch Polygamy Porter. The slogan? “Why have just one?”

(“Church at Blainville,” “Sundays,” “Portrait of the Artist’s Father,” “Nude Descending a Staircase”)

Four readers requested a post on Marcel Duchamp, one of the most controversial and most discussed artists in recent history. A Google search yields almost 1.5 million results for the French and American artist, whose 121st birthday was yesterday. Much of the controversy and discussion revolves around Duchamp’s “readymades,” particularly “Fountain” (1917), but, as evidenced by the four works of art above, there is so much more to Marcel Duchamp than just a urinal.

1. Like Pablo Picasso, Marcel Duchamp was well-schooled in more traditional artwork before he became known for his boundary-pushing works. As a boy, he received awards at school for his artwork and, upon graduation, he studied art at Académie Julian for a year. Jacques Villon, his older brother and a well-regarded painter, acted as his art mentor. Another brother, Raymond-Duchamp-Villon, was a sculptor while sister Suzanne Duchamp-Crotti was a painter. Grandfather Emile Nicolle was a painter and engraver.

2. Duchamp had varied interests and was particularly fascinated with math, mechanization, and technology. After visiting an exhibition of aviation technology, he remarked to Constantin Brancusi, “Painting is washed up. Who will ever do anything better than that propeller? Tell me, can you do that?” His upside-down bicycle wheel mounted onto a stool, now usually presented as art, wasn’t originally intended to be art. Duchamp simply enjoyed watching it spin, just as he enjoyed “looking at the flames dancing in the fireplace.” He also created several other pieces, like his “Precision Optics” pieces, which he explicitly said were not art.

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Recently, Stephen Colbert had a segment on his show where he celebrated a great honor: a spider being named after him. John Cleese said last week that having a lemur named after him was an honor he liked more than the possibility of knighthood. It’s not unusual for species to be named after celebrities. In fact, a look through nature’s nomenclature is practically equal parts Latin textbook and US Weekly. But how do celebrities get this honor?

Some scientists saw a resemblance between their creatures and the celebrities in question. For example, the Agra schwarzeneggeri is a beetle with a developed middle femora, which resembles a bulging bicep, not unlike bodybuilder/actor/governor Arnold Schwarzenegger’s. Or there’s the Greeffiella beatlei, a worm with particularly shaggy fur reminiscent of the Beatles’ early haircuts.
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Every aspect of the American presidency comes under intense scrutiny, but few parts of a president’s life contain as many amusing, slightly sordid anecdotes as their siblings’ behavior. When a new president takes office, his ne’er-do-well siblings receive a whole slew of opportunities for corrupt behavior, legal scrapes, and generally humiliating mayhem. Here are a few of our favorites:

1. Neil Bush: Opening Doors When Opportunity Knocks!

George W. Bush’s younger brother Neil certainly hasn’t done much to make his brother’s political life any easier. Neil’s been making the wrong kind of news since as far back as the 1980s, when as the son of Vice President George H.W. Bush he served as a director of Silverado Savings and Loan, which cost taxpayers an estimated $1 billion when it collapsed. He drew accusations of insider trading chicanery in 1999 when he made nearly $800,000 in three trades of Kopin Corporation stock in a single day; Bush had been a consultant for Kopin and sold on the day the stock’s price soared as the result of good news from a client. Bush also had a somewhat dubious-sounding arrangement with Grace Semiconductor, a Chinese company with ties to former Chinese president Jiang Zemin. Despite admittedly not knowing anything about semiconductors, Bush had a deal to receives $2 million in stock and $10,000 for every board meeting he attended to discuss business strategies, a deal that led to claims of influence peddling.

These little business episodes were just appetizers for Bush’s truly bizarre 2003 divorce proceedings. His wife Sharon Smith accused Bush of enjoying the company of high-priced escorts on business trips to Thailand and Hong Kong. (Bush’s defense:  yes, he had sex with these strange women, but they might not have been prostitutes. They just showed up at his door, and he slept with them. No money changed hands.) Not content to let things die with that simple embarrassment of infidelity, Neil’s friend John Spalding accused Sharon of pulling out Neil’s hair for use in a voodoo curse. Sharon countered that she simply wanted the hair tested for evidence of cocaine use. In either event, the President couldn’t have been too pleased as this saga played out in front of the media.

2. Roger Clinton: Codename “Headache”

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When it comes to medication, what you don’t know could kill you. Or cause eyelid droop, amnesia and decreased sweating. We’ve scoured the warning labels for possible side effects. Do you know what else these drugs can do?

Take the Quiz: The Not-So-Fine Print

Most bank robberies follow a similar pattern: robber enters bank, approaches teller while brandishing a weapon, demands money, and (he hopes) makes his escape. So when a robbery call came in Saturday morning, September 21, 1991, for the Texas Commerce Bank in San Antonio, Texas, law enforcement officials had to double-check the address. It was a motor bank, that is, a bank that provided drive-thru service only by tellers locked inside a small building behind layers of bullet-proof glass. How could such a fortress get robbed?

The Crime

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Why are Cats So Darn Popular on the Internet?

This is the question that’s been on my mind a lot lately, and I want some answers! I’ve noticed over the years that some of our most popular posts have had something to do with cats. From LOLcats to cat games, from famous cats to your own cats, we’ve seen and written about ‘em all. But that doesn’t help me answer the question: why are they so popular on the Internet?

I’m a dog person, so maybe my problem with all the unabashed cat-fuss is simple envy.

But, as the old saying goes, if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. So here goes nothing: My brother adopted a kitten not too long ago and he’s so caught up in the hubbub, he even wrote and shot a love letter for the feline (named Barkley) in the form of a music video. Check it out below and let us know what you think. If enough of you like it, maybe Barkley will start making semi-regular appearances on the blog. And maybe I’ll fall into the fold then, too…

myspace.com/marcisraelfilms
myspace.com/marcisraelmusic

Are they really right for you? Don’t leave it to your heart to decide… let the math do the judging! Here are three mathematical theories to help determine if your marriage will last (or if it should happen at all).

1. The Mathematics of Marriage

In their book, The Mathematics of Marriage, mathematician James D. Murray and psychologist John Gottman describe their use of calculus to study interactions between couples. Using a model Gottman developed in 1979, the pair surveyed 700 newly married couples in King County, Washington in 1992. They analyzed couples’ 15 minute conversations using a scoring system that assigned a number based on each statement, expression, and even pulse rates. Then they model quantified the ratio of positive to negative interactions during the talk. The magic ratio was 5:1. When the ratio falls below this, a relationship may be in trouble.

These numbers were plotted as a function of time and were used to make predictions as to whether the couple would i) divorce, or ii) stay married a) happily, or b) unhappily. They called this the “Dow Jones for Marital Conversation.” Every 1-2 years until 2004 the couples were asked to complete a questionnaire assessing their marriage. The predictions on which couples would get divorced was 94% accurate, and typically divorce occurred after 4 years.

2. The 37% Rule

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In a world where computers, music players, game systems, and automobiles come and go, we manage to become attached to our toasters. This simple appliance makes our bread warm enough to melt butter and crisp enough to hold honey or jam. An oven or even a stovetop will do the same thing, but you’ll rarely find a kitchen that doesn’t have a toaster.

Your Childhood Friend

The Brave Little Toaster is the hero of the book and movie (and their sequels) about a group of appliances that are not merely machines, they are old friends. The way Toaster and his owner feel about each other gives us a clue about our fondness for toasters: for many people, using a toaster is our first childhood cooking experience. And there’s nothing like eating bread you toasted yourself when you’re four years old.

Toast Imprinting

Mom used to imprint faces on soft bread with a spoon or knife, which would show up on toast and make kids eager to eat breakfast. Now there are specialty toasters that will brand your bread with all kinds of symbolism. The Hello Kitty Toaster is one example. You might prefer to have your toast embossed with a pirate’s skull and crossbones, with the Totenkopf Toaster SKULL-Toast.

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Today’s Brain Game is rather taxing; it’s a puzzle I’ve had in my head for some time and finally brought out to see the light of day. It has to do with old-fashioned LCD/LED digit indicators. You know the type, with seven bars that combine to make all the digits from zero to nine:

The middle horizontal segment stopped lighting on an older digital clock I had some years ago, and it became impossible to tell exactly what time it was, since some numbers looked alike. That always made me wonder if any of the segments could burn out WITHOUT harming one’s ability to tell the time at ANY hour of the day.

As an example, here’s what the numbers zero to nine would have looked like on my broken clock, with the middle segment is missing:

As you can see in the diagram, even if you KNOW the middle bar is bad, you can’t tell a zero from an eight because you would never know if that segment was supposed to be blank (meaning it’s a zero) or supposed to be filled (meaning it’s an eight).

Recently, I plugged in all the possible numbers and segments and found the answer. There are TWO segments of the seven which, if you KNOW they are the ones that fail to display, will still allow a smart viewer to tell the time. In fact, even if BOTH these segments disappear, you can still tell the time as long as you know the specific two that have failed.

The Brain Game? Figure out which two. Good luck!

HERE’S the answer.