mental_floss Blog

This Week’s Most Popular Stories

Jason English — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 23:50:17 +0000

In case you weren’t obsessively refreshing mentalfloss.com all week, here’s what you missed:

1. 5 Classic Poisons and the People Who Used Them, by Miss Cellania
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2. The Quick 10: If 10 Fast Food Joints Had Stuck With the Original Plan, by Stacy Conradt
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3. R2-D2, GOB Bluth & Other Fictional Folks Who Stopped by Sesame Street, by Joe Hennes
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4. Was There Really a Granny Smith? 9 Fruit & Veggie Origins, by Ethan Trex
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5. Worth More Dead Than Alive: 5 Famous Grave Robberies, by Rob Lammle
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6. How Superman Defeated the Ku Klux Klan, by Mark Juddery
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7. Strange Geographies: The Forgotten High School of Goldfield, Nevada, by Ransom Riggs
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8. The Quick 10: 10 Really Bizarre Soap Opera Plots, by Stacy Conradt
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9. Can Boat Captains Really Marry People? by Matt Soniak
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10. One Sweet Severance Package & Other Tales of the ABA, by Keith Law

See Also: October’s Most Popular Stories

Toilet Paper History: How America Convinced the World to Wipe

Linda Rodriguez — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 17:24:18 +0000

Since the dawn of time, people have found nifty ways to clean up after the bathroom act. The most common solution was simply to grab what was at hand: coconuts, shells, snow, moss, hay, leaves, grass, corncobs, sheep’s wool—and, later, thanks to the printing press—newspapers, magazines, and pages of books. The ancient Greeks used clay and stone. The Romans, sponges and salt water. But the idea of a commercial product designed solely to wipe one’s bum? That started about 150 years ago, right here in the U.S.A. In less than a century, Uncle Sam’s marketing genius turned something disposable into something indispensable.

How Toilet Paper Got on a Roll

The first products designed specifically to wipe one’s nethers were aloe-infused sheets of manila hemp dispensed from Kleenex-like boxes. They were invented in 1857 by a New York entrepreneur named Joseph Gayetty, who claimed his sheets prevented hemorrhoids. Gayetty was so proud of his therapeutic bathroom paper that he had his name printed on each sheet. But his success was limited. Americans soon grew accustomed to wiping with the Sears Roebuck catalog, and they saw no need to spend money on something that came in the mail for free.

Toilet paper took its next leap forward in 1890, when two brothers named Clarence and E. Irvin Scott popularized the concept of toilet paper on a roll. The Scotts’ brand became more successful than Gayetty’s medicated wipes, in part because they built a steady trade selling toilet paper to hotels and drugstores. But it was still an uphill battle to get the public to openly buy the product, largely because Americans remained embarrassed by bodily functions. In fact, the Scott brothers were so ashamed of the nature of their work that they didn’t take proper credit for their innovation until 1902.

“No one wanted to ask for it by name,” says Dave Praeger, author of Poop Culture: How America Is Shaped by Its Grossest National Product. “It was so taboo that you couldn’t even talk about the product.” By 1930, the German paper company Hakle began using the tag line, “Ask for a roll of Hakle and you won’t have to say toilet paper!”

As time passed, toilet tissues slowly became an American staple. But widespread acceptance of the product didn’t officially occur until a new technology demanded it. At the end of the 19th century, more and more homes were being built with sit-down flush toilets tied to indoor plumbing systems. And because people required a product that could be flushed away with minimal damage to the pipes, corncobs and moss no longer cut it. In no time, toilet paper ads boasted that the product was recommended by both doctors and plumbers.

The Strength of Going Soft

In the early 1900s, toilet paper was still being marketed as a medicinal item. But in 1928, the Hoberg Paper Company tried a different tack. On the advice of its ad men, the company introduced a brand called Charmin and fitted the product with a feminine logo that depicted a beautiful woman. The genius of the campaign was that by evincing softness and femininity, the company could avoid talking about toilet paper’s actual purpose. Charmin was enormously successful, and the tactic helped the brand survive the Great Depression. (It also helped that, in 1932, Charmin began marketing economy-size packs of four rolls.) Decades later, the dainty ladies were replaced with babies and bear cubs—advertising vehicles that still stock the aisles today.

By the 1970s, America could no longer conceive of life without toilet paper. Case in point: In December 1973, Tonight Show host Johnny Carson joked about a toilet paper shortage during his opening monologue. But America didn’t laugh. Instead, TV watchers across the country ran out to their local grocery stores and bought up as much of the stuff as they could. In 1978, a TV Guide poll named Mr. Whipple—the affable grocer who implored customers, “Please don’t squeeze the Charmin”—the third best-known man in America, behind former President Richard Nixon and the Rev. Billy Graham.

Currently, the United States spends more than $6 billion a year on toilet tissue—more than any other nation in the world. Americans, on average, use 57 squares a day and 50 lbs. a year.

Even still, the toilet paper market in the United States has largely plateaued. The real growth in the industry is happening in developing countries. There, it’s booming. Toilet paper revenues in Brazil alone have more than doubled since 2004. The radical upswing in sales is believed to be driven by a combination of changing demographics, social expectations, and disposable income.

“The spread of globalization can kind of be measured by the spread of Western bathroom practices,” says Praeger. When average citizens in a country start buying toilet paper, wealth and consumerism have arrived. It signifies that people not only have extra cash to spend, but they’ve also come under the influence of Western marketing.

America Without Toilet Paper

Even as the markets boom in developing nations, toilet paper manufacturers find themselves needing to charge more per roll to make a profit. That’s because production costs are rising. During the past few years, pulp has become more expensive, energy costs are rising, and even water is becoming scarce. Toilet paper companies may need to keep hiking up their prices. The question is, if toilet paper becomes a luxury item, can Americans live without it?

The truth is that we did live without it, for a very long time. And even now, a lot of people do. In Japan, the Washlet—a toilet that comes equipped with a bidet and an air-blower—is growing increasingly popular. And all over the world, water remains one of the most common methods of self-cleaning. Many places in India, the Middle East, and Asia, for instance, still depend on a bucket and a spigot. But as our economy continues to circle the drain, will Americans part with their beloved toilet paper in order to adopt more money-saving measures? Or will we keep flushing our cash away? Praeger, for one, believes a toilet-paper apocalypse is hardly likely. After all, the American marketing machine is a powerful thing.

This article originally appeared in mental_floss magazine. Toilet paper image courtesy of Cary Norton.

More from mental_floss…

Cheetos Lip Balm & Other Bizarre Brand Extensions
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12 Fun Facts About Deodorant
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5 Times Drug Companies Promised Too Much (Or Explained Too Little)
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11 Famous Actors and the Big TV Roles They Turned Down
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Ben & Jerry’s Bagels? The Original Plans of 10 Fast Food Joints
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5 Amazing Stories of Messages in Bottles
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13 Bizarre Stipulations in Wills
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7 Crafty Zoo Escapes
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31 Unbelievable High School Mascots
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The Amazing Story of Holocaust Hero Chiune Sugihara

The Weekend Links

Allison Keene — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 17:20:56 +0000

From the Annals of Too Much Time: An incredible movie mashup that creates a song (that rhymes! with a beat!) from bits of dialogue spanning TV and movies from the ’20s onward. (Also try playing the game of “which movie is that from?” while you watch)
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Will the Duggars inherit the earth? Is Jim Bob the new Genghis Khan? Scary!
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Bored at work? Try getting inspiration from some of these Best Office Pranks of All Time. As the site aptly says, “Nothing says happy birthday like being an obsessive compulsive prick.”
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Just another reason to stay out of the water (ok ok, so these creatures are typically REALLY far down in the ocean … but still!): the 12 Most Bizarre and Frightening Deep Sea Creatures.
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Still, we shouldn’t pick on deep sea dwellers just because they aren’t stupidly cute. After all, some very gorgeous things can be quite deadly, such as these 13 unassuming poisonous plants.
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From Jan: If you think you know your car facts (or at least can recognize cars based on several arcane-to-obvious clues), try your hand at this car quiz. (er … I made a D)
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Sure, the writer-director or actor-singer is nothing new. But a singer-wrestler? When certain celebrity’s careers tank, they might turn to wrestling to get a small second wind going (See: K-Fed, Steve-O), but unfortunately fame rarely goes the other way. Here is a list of 7 professional wrestlers who unsuccessfully tried to become musicians.
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Sure, most of you will have seen the majority of these Eye-Popping Illusions, but I always find them fun. Someone in the comments posted a link to one in particular which I hadn’t seen before, and I couldn’t get over it. Too cool!

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8 Cutting-Edge Cheese Sculptures
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It was always hard for me to believe in French class that a cow or dog made a completely different sound in France than it did in the United States. But perhaps they do … after all, it turns out that newborn babies cry in their native tongues!
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So what exactly separates humans from animals? As this chart proves, less than you think.
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Interesting and sobering space images that compares Earth’s size to the other planets as well as other stars in our solar system and far beyond.
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Sure we all get tired of getting menus stuffed under our doors, but how far would you go to stop it? This note surely takes the cake! Do any of you Flossers have proven methods of your own?
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Feel like sleeping away a third of your life is a waste? Here are some different sleep techniques to maximize sleep efficiency. (Has anyone tried any of this alternative methods?)
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Further proof that, to cats, humans are just large head-scratching machines.
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A very apt comic for anyone who knows (or who is!) an indie rock snob.
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Finally, a “do with this what you will” link: Aileen sent in this odd video and admitted that the drummer in question is her brother, and Flossy reader Danyel also sent in the same link (a rare occurrence), so it must be popular in some circles this week! (This was a close contender for the “Annals of Too Much Time”)
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I hope everyone had a great week and restful weekend ahead. Just don’t forget to keep sending in those great links! Submit all finds to FlossyLinks@gmail.com

[Last Weekend's Links]

Lunchtime Quiz Leftovers

Jason English — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 12:58:28 +0000

The 5pm Quiz: State Flags

Ethan Trex — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 22:00:15 +0000

We’ve tested your knowledge of state quarters, license plates and state nicknames. And earlier this week, you wowed us with your mastery of flags of the world. Now let’s see how well you know your state flags.

Even if you don’t ace this one, you’ll be a better person for knowing some of these peculiar designs are flying over statehouses throughout the country.

Take the Quiz: State Flags

The Quick 10: 10 of the Best Books of 2009

Stacy Conradt — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 20:41:43 +0000

I hate the end of Daylight Saving Time. It means it’s dark by the time I get home at the end of the day, which makes it feel like the day is already over, which means I go home and get nothing done for the rest of the night. But there is a silver lining to this cloud: lots of loafing = lots more reading. For some reason I don’t feel as guilty about sitting on the couch with a book as I do when there’s daylight to burn. Luckily for me, Publishers Weekly just came out with their Top Books of 2009 list. Since I’m more apt to read fiction when I’m reading for fun, I’m going to list those – but if you want the whole list (including non-fiction, poetry and comics) you can check it out here. In no particular order, here are 10 of their favorite novels of 2009 thus far (their descriptions, not mine).

1. The Little Stranger, by Sarah Waters. A finalist for the Man Booker Prize, this subtle, creepy haunted house story chronicles the decline of an aristocratic county family after WWII as seen through the less than reliable eyes of a bachelor doctor, whose mother once served as a maid at the family’s manor.

2. Jeff in Venice, Death in Varanasi by Geoff Dyer. Dyer creates an aging hipster grinding it out as a freelance journalist who pursues the girl instead of the story: covering the Biennale. Then, depending on your point of view, he either loses or finds himself when he’s sent to Varanasi. Dyer has many books to recommend him, but all you need is angst-ridden Jeff: funny, frank and utterly charming, and if you haven’t walked in his shoes, you’ll wish you had.

3. The Scarecrow by Michael Connelly. Reporter Jack McEvoy decides to go out with a bang, after he’s laid off from the L.A. Times, in a nail-biting thriller that charts the demise of print journalism and shows why Connelly is one of today’s top crime authors.

4. The Fate of Katherine Carr by Thomas H. Cook. Edgar-winner Cook eloquently explores the often cathartic act of storytelling as George Gates, a former travel writer who after seven years still broods over his eight-year-old son’s murder, looks into the unsolved disappearance of reclusive poet Katherine Carr 20 years earlier.

5. Dark Places by Gillian Flynn. Flynn tops her impressive debut, Sharp Objects, with a second crime thriller, centered on the slaying of a mother and two daughters in their Kansas farmhouse witnessed by the youngest, surviving daughter. It builds to a truth so twisted even the most astute readers won’t see it coming.

6. The Man in the Wooden Hat by Jane Gardam. Octogenarian Gardam bookends her much-lauded Old Filth with this witty and very British love story, taking on with aplomb loyalty, lust, ambition and longing as she excavates the holes in all of our hearts.
7. Ravens by George Dawes Green. Two con men hold a family hostage in rural Georgia in order to get half of their $318 million lottery winnings in this masterful, often comic novel of psychological suspense, Green’s first since 1995’s The Juror.

8. Tinkers by Paul Harding. George Crosby’s deathbed reveries wander through memories of his own life as a boy and the lives of his father and grandfather, in this sumptuously written first novel that has been the darling of indie bookstores.

9. The Cry of the Sloth by Sam Savage. The increasingly desperate letters dispatched by the editor of a middling literary magazine provide a glimpse into the soul of a minor writer ravaged by existential dread. As Savage slowly deflates the narrator’s self-importance, he provides a caustic and supremely funny portrait of a man in decline.

10. The Last War by Ana Menendez. A deeply moving story of a photojournalist in Istanbul waiting to join her war correspondent husband in Iraq. Her reluctance, suspicions and flashbacks of their time spent in Afghanistan create a dark background for the brilliance of her descriptions and observations.

I lied – I did put one of these in a particular order: the first one is the one I’m adding to my Amazon shopping cart as we speak. Can any of you vouch for any of these? If you’ve recently read something you thought was amazing that isn’t on the Publishers Weekly list, share in the comments – I’d love to add a few new books to my winter “must-read” list, and I bet some of our readers would too.

5 Things You Didn’t Know About Pat Sajak

Ethan Trex — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 19:33:08 +0000

He’ll sell you a vowel or sympathize when you go bankrupt, but how well do you know Wheel of Fortune host Pat Sajak? Here are a few things you might not have known about the veteran game show man.

1. He Got to Say “Good Morning, Vietnam”

Sajak joined the U.S. Army in 1968 with the hope that he could avoid being sent to Vietnam. Of course, since it was 1968, that plan didn’t work out so well; Sajak ended up working as a finance clerk in Long Binh, Vietnam. Desperate to switch jobs, he kept applying for radio duty, but nothing happened.

Eventually, Sajak hit on an idea. He wrote a letter to one of his old radio employers who had been elected to Congress. A few calls to the right people later, and Sajak became an Army disc jockey, a job he held for 18 months. Sajak didn’t love a lot of the military’s radio rules, so he circumvented them. He later told the New York Times, “If you said your name, you were supposed to say your rank – specialist fifth class, which kind of ruins your patter. So on the radio I would just not say my name at all. I went for a year on radio without ever identifying myself.”

2. His Career Had a Rough Start

Sajak’s first steady radio gig was in Chicago on a tiny 250-watt Spanish language station. He worked a midnight-to-6-a.m. shift reading the news every hour as it came in off the wire. Although the station was Spanish, Sajak read the news in English, which probably limited his audience. On top of that, he didn’t speak Spanish, and the disc jockey he worked with didn’t speak English, which made the transition to the news a bit tricky. Sajak later told USA Today, “I’d hear him say my name, and I figured that was my cue. I made whatever was minimum wage at the time. I think $1.80 an hour.”

3. He “Looks Like Everyone’s Uncle”

Sajak may be synonymous with Wheel of Fortune now, but he hasn’t always been the show’s host. Chuck Woolery of Love Connection fame was the original host for the first six years of the show’s run, but in 1981 he parted ways with the show.

Wheel of Fortune was a hit, but now it needed a new host. Game show mogul Merv Griffin was watching the news in Los Angeles when he saw a promising young weatherman named Pat Sajak on KNBC-TV. Griffin hand-picked Sajak to take over Wheel, later explaining that he liked Sajak because he “looked live everyone’s uncle.”

4. Late Night Didn’t Go So Well

In early 1989, Sajak was looking for a new challenge, so he decided to try a jump to late night. CBS started airing Sajak’s nightly 90-minute talk show with an interesting philosophy: instead of trying to revolutionize late-night programming, Sajak and his producers thought the medium was already great and tried to build a broad appeal by maintaining the status quo. Check out this odd lineup of guests from the first episode of The Pat Sajak Show: Chevy Chase, Joan Van Ark, baseball commissioner Peter Ueberroth, and music from the Judds.

The show may have been broad, but its appeal wasn’t. Sajak didn’t thrive in the late-night game, and the show got the ax after just over a year despite Sajak being signed to a two-year guaranteed contract.

Towards the end of the show’s run, CBS started using the show as an audition platform for replacement hosts, including a radio up-and-comer named Rush Limbaugh. This experiment didn’t go so well; Limbaugh immediately brought up abortion and locked horns with a female audience member. Have a look for yourself:

5. He Loves Baseball

Maybe it was only natural that Sajak would have Ueberroth on his first late-night show; the man is a baseball nut. (You may have spotted him sitting behind home plate during an Angels-Yankees ALCS game in Anaheim.) In fact, he loves baseball so much that in 2004 he pounced on the opportunity to become an investor in the upstart Golden Baseball League. The independent league, which now has 10 teams spread across the U.S., Canada, and Mexico, has actually had some luck at getting players Major League Baseball jobs, including Seattle Mariners reliever Chris Jakubauskas.

Although many fledgling leagues quickly flop, the GBL is still going strong after five years. Sajak was even rewarded with his own bobblehead, which you can pick up for a measly five bucks.

‘5 Things You Didn’t Know About…’ appears every Friday. Read the previous installments here.

8 Memorable Sesame Street Celebrity Cameos

Joe Hennes — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 18:36:26 +0000

Over 400 celebrities have guest starred on Sesame Street, including actors, musicians, writers, politicians and athletes. The upcoming 40th season will feature appearances by Adam Sandler, Matthew Fox, Ricky Gervais, Judah Friedlander, both Gyllenhaals, Paul Rudd and Michelle Obama. Here are a few memorable guest spots from the first 39 years.

1. James Earl Jones Scares Your Children

In Sesame Street’s second episode, James Earl Jones became the first celebrity guest (which was no surprise, since he was a student of Will Lee, Sesame’s Mr. Hooper). Although having a big star like Jones is no shocker, what’s strange is how he appeared. In a close-up of Jones’ shiny, bald head, he counted to 10 and recited the alphabet in an intense, booming voice. The appeal, of course, was that a big star was participating in some basic preschool education, but the result was something truly terrifying to the toddlers in the audience (or at least to me, right now).

That didn’t stop Sesame Street from bringing Jones back to host their 10th anniversary special, which featured less terror and more hair.

2. Ralph Nader: Consumer Advocate/Grammar Snob

Perhaps my favorite strange celebrity appearance is from a Sesame Street PBS pledge drive special from 1988 featuring Ralph Nader. He joined Bob for a chorus of “The People in Your Neighborhood,” singing, “A Consumer Advocate is a person in your neighborhood.” When asked what a Consumer Advocate is, Nader explained by inspecting Bob’s sweater, pointing out the shoddy workmanship, and destroying it in the process. While on the set, Nader initially refused to sing the song unless the lyrics were changed from “the people that you meet” to the more grammatically correct “the people whom you meet.” Of course, they relented.

Ten years later, Nader attacked Sesame Street and PBS for including commercial sponsorship spots before and after each show.

3. Mr. Donahue Meets Mr. Snuffleupagus

In 1985, Phil Donahue appeared in one of the most famous Sesame Street episodes—the one where Mr. Snuffleupagus is revealed to the world. Donahue interviewed the people on Sesame Street to find out if they thought Snuffy—who had been on the show since the early 1970s, but perceived by the adults as an imaginary friend of Big Bird—was real. After the adults met Snuffy for the first time, Donahue had the pleasure of giving him a big ol’ bear hug.

4. The Second Guy on the Moon

In 2005, Cookie Monster had it in his head that the moon is a giant cookie, which he plans on eating, thus altering the earth’s tides forever. Luckily, Gordon was paid a visit by his close friend, “Second Guy on the Moon” Buzz Aldrin, who rained on Cookie Monster’s parade by telling him the moon is just a big old rock. Though I didn’t learn much about the moon, I did learn that it’s very convenient to have famous friends.

5. The Micro Machines Guy

John Moschitta, Jr.—better known as either the fast-talking “FedEx Guy” or “Micro Machines Guy,” depending on when you were born—appeared in several Sesame Street sketches. In this clip, he introduces his children, who each have extremely long names, one for every letter of the alphabet. It’s unclear what lesson was being taught here.

6. Mayor Dinkins

Former New York Mayor Ed Koch made a cameo in The Muppets Take Manhattan, and current Mayor Mike Bloomberg appeared in A Muppets Christmas: Letters to Santa. But only one former Mayor appeared on Sesame Street. David Dinkins holds that honor, having appeared in 1992 to give Gordon the “Good Citizen Award.” Congratulations, Gordon! It couldn’t have happened to a nicer (or balder) guy.

7. Real Estate Tycoon Ronald Grump

It’s rare for Sesame Street plots to involve an actual villain. Oscar fills that position most often, though he’s more of a jerk than inherently evil. And we had the villainous Miss Finch and Huxley from Follow that Bird and Elmo in Grouchland, respectively. But one odd villain came to us by way of Joe Pesci, who portrayed the evil real estate tycoon Ronald Grump in the special, Sesame Street All-Star 25th Birthday: Stars and Street Forever! Pesci, donning the overblown Donald Trump toupee, decides to buy Sesame Street and replace it with high-rise condos. Naturally, his plans are foiled (by none other than Oscar the Grouch), and Sesame Street is safe from becoming a location on The Apprentice.

8. Neil Patrick Harris, Shoe Fairy

And no list of celebrity guests would be complete without Neil Patrick Harris’ 2008 appearance as the Shoe Fairy.

More from mental_floss…

R2-D2, GOB Bluth & Other Fictional Folks Who Stopped by Sesame Street
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Revisiting 8 Sesame Street Rumors
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Musicians & Their Awesome Appearances on Sesame Street
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11 Famous Actors and the Big TV Roles They Turned Down
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Ben & Jerry’s Bagels? The Original Plans of 10 Fast Food Joints
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5 Amazing Stories of Messages in Bottles
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13 Bizarre Stipulations in Wills
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7 Crafty Zoo Escapes
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31 Unbelievable High School Mascots

The Mental Floss Trivia Show: Save the Date! (12/6/09)

Jason English — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 18:19:05 +0000

“Probably the most important trivia night that week.”
—Mangesh Hattikudur

If you’re the kind of person who likes doing things and you live within commuting distance of New York, get this on your calendar: the first Mental Floss Trivia Show will be held on Sunday, December 6th at 7pm. This (extra) special event will take place at the Galapagos Arts Space in Brooklyn.

Come show off your trivia prowess, win moderately-sized prizes, and meet some of the mental_floss gang.

We’ll share more details as the big day approaches. You just go ahead and clear your schedule.

Friday Happy Hour: Unofficial Graduation Requirements & Bizarre Lies

Jason English — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 17:28:42 +0000

Every Friday, I post a series of unrelated questions meant to spark conversation in the comments. Answer one, answer all, respond to someone else’s reply, whatever you want. Very casual. On to this week’s topics of discussion…

1. A few years ago, we replaced our old radiators with baseboards. The guy we hired to do the work was a friend of a friend, and he was very nice and chatty. He told me all about his son—a wide receiver for Texas A&M. The details were impressive and crazy specific: “Last week he set the school record for receiving yards by a sophomore.” “He’s a bit undersized, but with the success of guys like Wes Welker”—then with the Dolphins and not very well known—”he might have a better chance of getting drafted in a couple years.” “He’s on the track team, too—Big 12 champion sprinter as a freshman!” He was such a proud dad.

Of course, he made the whole thing up. I Googled the man’s son—not because I didn’t believe him, but because I absolutely believed him, and I wanted to root for his kid, too. There was nobody by that name on the Texas A&M football team. Or at Texas A&M. Perplexed by the lie, I kept searching and found out the kid was an athlete. On his high school track team. Junior Varsity. Couldn’t find anyone else comparing him to Wes Welker, though.

People lie about stuff all the time. “I didn’t get your email!” “I’m not cheating on you with your brother!” “I did not eat your sandwich!” You can (probably) understand those. But what’s the most bizarre, completely unnecessary lie you’ve ever been told?

2. Did your college or high school have any non-traditional graduation requirements, either official or unofficial? I’ve heard stories about mandatory swimming classes, required because years ago the dean’s son drowned.^{[citation needed]}

I graduated from Duke, where unofficial requirements included driving backwards around the traffic circle, wandering around the semi-secret underground tunnels, and several I probably can’t discuss on a relatively family-friendly website. How about you?

3. I’ve got the Yankee parade on right now. It’s entertaining to watch the local TV reporter fail to interview almost every prominent player. (”Derek! Derek! Derek Jeter! Over here! Oh well. Class act!” / “Mariano! Hey! How are you, bud! Woo! What a guy!”)

I’m not much of a parade guy, on TV or otherwise. Perhaps this is because my hometown was parade crazy. Little League parades, Cub Scouts parades, Winter Wonderland parades, We-Promise-Not-To-Use-Drugs parades. Is every town like that? What’s the oddest parade you’ve attended or marched in?

[See all the previous Friday Happy Hour transcripts.]