Since I can't enter the Ernest Hemingway Lookalike pageant -- I mean, I assume it's no girls allowed -- I'm thinking about indulging my competitive spirit elsewhere, on MySpace. My very favorite self-styled mock-newscaster studbucket, Ze Frank, is running a contest to see who can create the world's ugliest MySpace page. (Even before the contest started there was a lot of competition.) If you think you can out-awful Ze's own creation and 144 others at last count, you've got three days left.