Speaking of not getting divorced, my wife and I celebrated our second anniversary on Monday. I rewarded her participation in the marriage with a leather briefcase from the Tumi Women's Collection. This gift made sense. She started a new job this week, and I had recently ruined her previous bag (There was an incident with a faulty travel mug.)

While the gift was perfect, it was not appropriate. I was getting ahead of myself. The third anniversary is the leather anniversary. Though I knew my wife couldn't care less, I slipped a bag of cotton balls inside to be safe. Crisis averted.

If you like to adhere strictly to tradition, here's what you need to know:

1st Anniversary = paper
2nd Anniversary = cotton
3rd = leather
4th = linen
5th = wood
6th = iron
7th = wool
8th = bronze
9th = pottery
10th = tin
11th = steel
12th = silk
13th = lace
14th = ivory
15th = crystal
20th = china
25th = silver
30th = pearl
35th = coral/jade
40th = ruby
45th = sapphire
50th = gold
55th = emerald
60th = diamond
70th = platinum