Bond (James Bond) Week: How to Roll


And finally, for our aspiring Bonds, here's where to go (and where not to go) and how to get there:

* "Unless you have something like 5,000 pounds to throw around [editor's note: not adjusted for inflation], you'll have to stick to talking about your car but somehow never actually producing it -- because, for instance, it needs very thorough repairs after running into a carpet of steel spikes dropped in front of it by a Russian agent you were pursuing along a French road. However, whether you really have it or just say you have it, your car is a 1954 Continental Bentley with the 'R' type chassis, the big 6 engine and a 13:40 back-axle ratio."

* "Although, characteristically, you know everything worth knowing about where you've been, you haven't been everywhere. You go where you're sent, as you smilingly remind anybody who looks surprised at your ignorance of St. Tropez or Copenhagen or Bethnal Green."

* "You have been known to stay at the Ritz, but only in exceptional circumstances: when pretending to be a diamond smuggler, or after being brainwashed by the K.G.B."

* "You have cordially disliked Paris since the war. It has pawned its heart to the tourists, to the Russians and Romanians and Bulgars, to the scum of the world who have gradually taken the town over. And, of course, to the Germans."

* "Istanbul: Your instinct tells you, as it has told other travellers, that you'll be glad to get out of the place alive."

* "Avoid St. Petersburg, Florida -- full of oldsters trying to keep alive until 90. it frightened the life out of you."