The incredible liver and its appeal

This summer I stumbled upon a detox, and I've been so fascinated with it that I'm keeping it up. It's like finally handing your body the microphone! It just has so much to say, and I want to give it the floor as long as I can stand it. And once it starts talking, the toxins keep coming. It's our biggest internal organ, so I suppose that makes sense.
I had no idea it took so long to detox, or that your liver was in much worse shape right after you stop drinking than it ever was while regulating normal function in the face of any dinner party libation you might tilt its way. I haven't had a hepatic function panel, but my acupuncturist confirmed that my liver started working overtime as soon as I stopped drinking--as if it were scrambling incase I might start soaking it with toxins again! So it's back to the reishi tea, and if that doesn't work, I'll try anything just short of Prometheus' "treatment" via-punitive-bird-of-prey.
Even if I didn't want to invest in my lovely, three pound, football-shaped wonder organ, it's possible it would still attract interest in the black market--especially if I were to be an executed prisoner, as the BBC found (organ trafficking bans aren't exactly flourishing). Though I'd prefer to just be able to use it as collateral. I'm not going to ask you if you've received quotes on any of your organs, but I would be interested in hearing about any detoxes you've survived.