Friday Happy Hour

Jason English

Let's jump right into the questions.

1) I was recently invited via bulk mail to (pay to) take a night class called "Protecting Yourself Against Identity Theft." I know people whose lives are absolutely consumed by this, to the point that they're shredding receipts for things they bought with cash. In 2006, Americans lost $56 billion in crimes of this nature. Have any of you ever had your identity stolen? Did you clear your name?

2) Speaking of night classes, I love reading our local school district's course catalog. I always find five classes I'd love to take and a dozen others to make snarky comments about. There's always something crazy geared at helicopter parents ("Visualizing Success for Your Little Leaguer") and a way-out-of-date computer class ("Mastering DOS"). The only class I've actually taken was dancing, in the months leading up to our wedding. Anyone taken any memorable night school courses? If you happen to have your local school's catalog, what's the strangest class being offered this semester?

superbowlxxv.jpg /

4) The other day, my wife called from her car in the driveway. "You're not going to believe this, but a woman was parked right behind my car." We live near an elementary school, so parents are always dropping their kids off. Which is fine. But the streets aren't very wide, and when someone parks directly behind our driveway on the opposite side of the street, it's difficult to navigate.

But that's not what she meant.

Someone had literally parked directly behind her car, blocking half our driveway, forcing Ellen to channel Dale, Jr., and go up on the grass to start her commute. This total lack of regard incensed me. I saw the car was still there, grabbed a camera and ran outside. In my pajamas. This idiocy needed to be documented. Before I could get a picture, the car's lights went on, and she peeled the hell out. I was left half-naked, with a camera, waving my arms at her rear-view mirror. Unhinged.

So, the next question is this: what really-not-that-big-a-deal occasion caused you to freak out at your neighbors?

5) And we'll end with one quick survey: if you're reading this from outside North America, can you tell us where you are? Google Analytics can tell us these things, but I just like to put faces to the stats. Or at least (screen) names.