Mental Floss

6 Porn Sites Actually Safe for Work

Ransom Riggs
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1. Espressoporn.blogspot.com

"Espresso in the nude," proclaims this site's top banner (as if it came any other way). What follows, in more than two years of archived posts, is literally nothing but huge close-up photos of espresso caught in various states of creamy expression, dripping into tiny cups. Hey, I like espresso a lot too, but I kind of draw the line at finding it erotic.

2. Foodporn.com

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3. Nerd Porn

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Lisa is a purple beauty from the sunny coast of California, but she keeps cool so her huge processor won't overheat. Rawr!
Turn-ons: Big, fat tape backups. A sure hand when plugging in cables. Soldering irons. Pocket protectors.
Turn-offs: Dust. Baseball bats. Windows®.

4. Unboxing: Geek Porn

Distinct from nerd porn (in my book, at least), geek porn is a kind of strip-tease for gadget freaks, which consists mainly of videos and pictures of people opening boxes -- iPod boxes, MacBook Boxes (ie, anything Apple makes that comes in a box.) Here's classic bit of geek unboxing porn for you: this video of a guy unboxing his Playstation 3 has been viewed more than 700,000 times, a hit count that would make real porn sites green with envy.

5. Kitty Porn

There are too many kitty porn sites to name, and I'm ashamed to report that even a prestigious blog such as our own has stooped to posting it. (Remember our many LOLcat articles? Total kitty porn.) It's become such a problem that several anti-kitty porn websites have sprung up, dedicated to defending the rights of kitties everywhere, too often photographed against their will in compromisingly cute situations. This site outlines the crisis thusly:

Each day innumerable pictures of young cats go up on the Internet without their knowledge or consent. With a computer and phone line, anyone, even children, can easily find and view these pictures. Kitty porn spans economic lines as well as national borders. While we labor to protect our freedom of speech, who will protect those that cannot speak.

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6. Flora Porn

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