Our New Afternoon Links Column That We Need You Guys to Name

This is the first edition of our new afternoon links round-up. The problem is, we need a name. Something to make it stand out from the 27,000 afternoon links round-ups that came before it. Leave a comment with your best suggestion. If yours is chosen you'll be swooped up in a whirlwind of overnight fame, where your every waking moment will be consumed with fanciful pleasure the likes of which you've never imagined. Plus you’ll win a shirt.

I’ve Got Good News and Bad News…

The good news is that, despite the absurd number of reality shows indicating otherwise, Americans may actually be getting smarter. The bad news is that while they get smarter they might get uglier. Or will they?

But You Know What They Say About Beauty. It’s All In the Eye of The Beholder. Or People Magazine. Or A Scientist With A Tape Measure.

Beyonce may have just been named World’s Most Beautiful Woman by People, but, according to science, the world’s most beautiful face belongs to an 18-year old British woman named Florence Colgate. How do you determine that? You just rely on a simple, totally-not-at-all-dehumanizing set of criteria:

"The ratio of the distance between her ears to the distance between her pupils is nearly 2:1 — the scientific ideal. Furthermore, the distance between her eyes to her mouth is just under a third of the distance from her hairline to her chin — another measure of perfect pulchritude."

One Reason to Be Excited Today: Old VHS Tapes Sometimes Turn Up Mind-Blowing 80s Relics Like This

Splitsider was good enough to share this with us recently – as well as Alan Thicke’s memories of making this 80s masterpiece. If you want to watch the entire thing, check out the rest on mittdawson’s YouTube page.

“A Picture Is Worth a Bunch of Words That Describe Exactly What the Picture Is Supposed to Be of, But There’s No Actual Picture”.

Instead of this camera taking a picture (because that would just be dumb), it instead just gives you a printout where it explains in text what the picture would look like. Because who wants a picture of your kids experiencing a quintessential childhood moment when you could instead just have a piece of paper that says:

“A small child sitting on the lap of an obese man with a large white beard.”

Happy Birthday, Wes Anderson

-I like your nurse's uniform, guy.
-These are O.R. scrubs.
-O R they?