12 Behind-the-Scenes Secrets of Private Investigators

iStock
iStock

In the movies, private investigators are often depicted as gun-toting outlaws who get results the police can’t by knocking down doors and shaking down suspects. In reality, licensed PIs don’t usually have to nurse any broken knuckles. They tackle insurance fraud, infidelity, and corporate impropriety by diligently combing through records and trailing persons of interest, using experience garnered from backgrounds in law enforcement, loss prevention, or the military.

That doesn’t mean they don’t have to occasionally go undercover, or think fast when they’ve been spotted. Check out these 12 lesser-known facts about what it's like to be a detective for hire.

1. THEY WORK UNDERCOVER.

Slipping into a new job for investigative purposes isn’t limited to law enforcement. Jordan Smith, founder and chief investigator at Hyperion Investigative Consulting in Broomfield, Colorado, says his firm frequently pursues cases relating to corporate or business fraud by getting one of their PIs hired at the company to see what’s going on. “If you’re a company with a retail location that’s missing deposits, we can go in and see what’s happening for ourselves,” he says. “Right now, we have someone at a hospital to see who might be stealing prescription drugs. Sometimes we can send a certified fraud examiner to work as an accountant.” The best part? “We can get paid the employee rate as well as for the investigative work we do.”

2. BEING CATFISHED? THEY CAN HELP.

Online dating has been a boon for PIs: people intertwined in internet romances sometimes begin to have suspicions about whether the person they’re corresponding with is telling them the truth. “They’re wondering if the person is who they say they are,” says Brendan Burke, a PI with Gilliam Burke Investigations in Edmonton, Alberta. “It gets to the point where they begin asking for money. We had one case where someone was claiming he owned businesses and properties he didn’t. Typically, the client is an older woman who’s divorced and looking for attention. They want to believe. But if you think you’re being scammed, you probably are.”

3. THEY PEE IN BOTTLES.

A key element of surveillance work—typically done to observe behavior like infidelity, or unwarranted physical exertion in the case of worker's compensation—is remaining undetected. That means not getting out of a parked car constantly, and handling personal business during a typical 12-hour spy shift any way you can. When it comes to bathroom behavior, Smith says, “You need to go before you get there. But we’ll bring a pee bottle.”

For number twos? “We just hold it. I’ve never not held it.”

4. THEY’LL GO DUMPSTER DIVING.

Despite having a wealth of information available both online and at public records locations, detectives sometimes find their best resource is a trash can. “Once something is thrown away, we can collect it,” Burke says. “It depends on your local municipality. But we’ve had success with it. With one child custody case, we were able to find evidence of drug use—crack pipes and powders.” And yes, it’s gross. “We use face masks with some Vicks rubbed into it.”

5. THEY’LL CREATE FAKE FACEBOOK ACCOUNTS TO CHECK YOU OUT.

For intel, nothing beats "friending" a case subject on Facebook. Since subjects probably won’t accept a request from a PI, some opt for creating fake accounts. “It’s safe to say most of us have a few different accounts,” says Skyler Crowley, a private investigator in Florida. “Some guys like blondes, some guys like redheads. Whatever gets us in. My fake accounts are exponentially more popular than me.”

6. THEY CAN FIND OUT HOW MUCH MONEY YOU HAVE.

Depending on their location, it might be permissible for PIs to get access to your bank accounts—not to manage your funds, but to find out exactly how much money you have to see if you might be withholding assets during a divorce or other litigation. “It’s a trade secret, but we do have ways of finding out where someone has an account and how much money is in it,” Smith says. “It’s generally not admissible in court, but it’s info we’re allowed to give to attorneys.”

7. THEY GET ASKED TO INVESTIGATE THE PARANORMAL.

Every so often, someone will confuse Burke for a Ghostbuster. “The most unusual request, I think, was from someone who thought their TV was haunted,” he says. “That’s … well outside of what we do.”

8. SOCIAL MEDIA IS LIKE ONE GIANT DATABASE.

Having a social media profile is probably bad news if you’re trying to stay off a PI’s radar. “It’s a gold mine of information,” Smith says. “People like to document their entire life. I’ve seen people who were supposedly ‘injured’ at work posting pictures of exercising. I’ve also been able to figure out what vehicles a person owns because of photos online.” And remember, even when you delete something it might still be retrievable. “Nothing just goes away,” Smith says.

9. THERE’S A TRICK TO FOLLOWING CARS.

Non-paranoid people aren't generally suspicious of someone following them, but there’s a good way to avoid detection when PIs want to track a car on the road. “When we have to follow people, we use two drivers,” Smith says. “That way, they’re not seeing the same car behind them all the time.”

10. CLIENTS AREN’T ALWAYS FORTHCOMING.

Sometimes PIs get hired for jobs without getting the full story. “One guy called me at midnight for me to do surveillance that night on his house because he was out of town and his teenage daughter was home alone,” Cowley says. “I thought it was very weird and last minute but I wasn't going to turn down the job. He called me every 10 minutes until 4 am. Eventually he asked me to get out of the car and sneak up to the windows to see if another man was with his daughter. That's when I realized something more was going on there. It turns out the man was separated from his wife and was extremely jealous of her new boyfriend. He wanted me to watch them. I said no.”

11. THEY HAVE INFORMANTS.

Some PIs have a good enough rap to convince some of your associates that informing on you is in their best interests. Once, Smith was having trouble getting information on a woman who had custody of her children and spent most of her day in her apartment. “I was able to convince her landlord to call me two to three times a day with information,” Smith says. “It resulted in custody going to the father.”

12. SOME OF THEM AREN’T CRAZY ABOUT THE PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR LABEL.

Some detectives might not tell you they’re detectives, using terms like “legal investigator” instead to help ward off any stereotypes from pop culture. “Some PIs I know don't like to use the term because there’s a certain image of being shady, like a Philip Marlowe character,” Burke says. “But I find that most people think it’s interesting. It’s nothing I shy away from. I operate legally and ethically, and I’m proud of the work that I do.”

All images courtesy of iStock.

The ChopBox Smart Cutting Board Has a Food Scale, Timer, and Knife Sharper Built Right Into It

ChopBox
ChopBox

When it comes to furnishing your kitchen with all of the appliances necessary to cook night in and night out, you’ll probably find yourself running out of counter space in a hurry. The ChopBox, which is available on Indiegogo and dubs itself “The World’s First Smart Cutting Board,” looks to fix that by cramming a bunch of kitchen necessities right into one cutting board.

In addition to giving you a knife-resistant bamboo surface to slice and dice on, the ChopBox features a built-in digital scale that weighs up to 6.6 pounds of food, a nine-hour kitchen timer, and two knife sharpeners. It also sports a groove on its surface to catch any liquid runoff that may be produced by the food and has a second pull-out cutting board that doubles as a serving tray.

There’s a 254nm UVC light featured on the board, which the company says “is guaranteed to kill 99.99% of germs and bacteria" after a minute of exposure. If you’re more of a traditionalist when it comes to cleanliness, the ChopBox is completely waterproof (but not dishwasher-safe) so you can wash and scrub to your heart’s content without worry. 

According to the company, a single one-hour charge will give you 30 days of battery life, and can be recharged through a Micro USB port.

The ChopBox reached its $10,000 crowdfunding goal just 10 minutes after launching its campaign, but you can still contribute at different tiers. Once it’s officially released, the ChopBox will retail for $200, but you can get one for $100 if you pledge now. You can purchase the ChopBox on Indiegogo here.

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10 Secrets of Ice Cream Truck Drivers

asiafoto/iStock via Getty Images Plus
asiafoto/iStock via Getty Images Plus

Ever since Good Humor founder Harry Burt dispatched the first jingling ice cream trucks in Youngstown, Ohio, in 1920, kids and adults alike have had a primal reaction to the sight of a vehicle equipped with a cold, sugary payload. Today, ice cream trucks spend May through October hoping to entice customers into making an impulse beat-the-heat purchase. To get a better idea of what goes into making ice cream a portable business, Mental Floss spoke with several proprietors for their take on everything from ideal weather conditions to police encounters. Here’s the inside scoop.

1. IT CAN GET TOO HOT FOR BUSINESS.

The most common misconception about the ice cream truck business? That soaring temperatures mean soaring profits. According to Jim Malin, owner of Jim’s Ice Cream Truck in Fairfield, Connecticut, record highs can mean decreased profits. “When it’s really hot, like 90 or 100 degrees out, sales go way down,” Malin says. “People aren’t outside. They’re indoors with air conditioning.” And like a lot of trucks, Malin’s isn’t equipped with air conditioning. “I’m suffering and sales are suffering." The ideal temperature? "A 75-degree day is perfect.”

2. THEY DON’T JUST WANDER NEIGHBORHOODS ANYMORE.

An ice cream truck sits parked in a public spot
Chunky Dunks

The days of driving a few miles an hour down a residential street hoping for a hungry clientele have fallen by the wayside. Many vendors, including Malin, make up half or more of their business by arranging for scheduled stops at events like weddings, employee picnics, or school functions. “We do birthday parties, church festivals, sometimes block parties,” he says. Customers can pay in advance, meaning that all guests have to do is order from the menu.

3. SOME OF THEM DRIVE A MINIBUS INSTEAD OF A TRUCK.

For sheer ice cream horsepower, nothing beats a minibus. Laci Byerly, owner of Doodlebop’s Ice Cream Emporium in Jacksonville, Florida, uses an airport-style shuttle for her inventory. “Instead of one or two freezers, we can fit three,” she says. More importantly, the extra space means she doesn’t have to spend the day hunched over. “We can stand straight up.”

4. THEY HAVE A SECRET STASH OF ICE CREAM TO GIVE AWAY TO SPECIAL CUSTOMERS.

A picture of an ice cream truck menu.
Sarah Silbiger/Getty Images

The goal of any truck is to sell enough ice cream to justify the time and expense of operation, so freebies don’t make much sense—unless the truck happens to have some damaged goods. Malin says that it’s common for some pre-packaged bars to be broken inside wrappers, rendering them unattractive for sale. He sets these bars aside for kids who know the score. “I put them in a little box for kids who come up and ask if I have damaged ice cream,” he says. “Certain kids know I have it, and I’m happy to give it to them.”

5. THEY’RE CREATING CUSTOM ICE CREAM MENUS.

An ice cream nacho platter is shown
Chunky Dunks

While pre-packaged Popsicles and ice cream sandwiches remain perennial sellers, a number of trucks are mixing up business by offering one-of-a-kind treats. At the Chunky Dunks truck in Madison, Mississippi, owner Will Lamkin serves up Ice Cream Nachos, a signature dish that outsells anything made by Nestle. “It’s cinnamon sugar chips with your choice of ice cream,” he says. “You get whipped cream, too. And for the ‘cheese,’ it’s a caramel-chocolate sauce.” The nachos work because they’re “streetable,” Lamkin’s label for something people can carry while walking. “The next seven or eight people in line see it, and then everyone’s ordering it.”

6. THEY DON’T ALWAYS PLAY THE ICONIC JINGLE.

Before most people see an ice cream truck, they hear that familiar tinny tune. While some operators still rely on it for its familiarity, Malin and others prefer more modern tracks. “Normally we play ‘80s rock,” he says. “Or whatever we feel like playing that day. We rock it out.”

7. POP CULTURE CHARACTERS ARE SOME OF THEIR BEST SELLERS.

A Captain America ice cream treat
Doodlebop's

While adult customers tend to favor ice cream treats they remember from their youth, kids who don’t really recognize nostalgia tend to like items emblazoned with the likenesses and trademarks of licensed characters currently occupying their TV screens and local theaters. “Characters are the most popular with kids,” Byerly says. “SpongeBob, Minions, and Captain America.”

8. THEY KEEP DOG FOOD HANDY.

At Doodlebop’s, Byerly has a strategy for luring customers with pets: She keeps dog treats on hand. “The dog will sometimes get to us before the owner does,” she says. “If the dog comes up to the truck, he’ll get a Milkbone.” That often leads to a human companion purchasing a treat for themselves.

9. SOMETIMES RIVALS WILL CALL THE COPS.

Though there have been stories of rogue ice cream vendors aggressively competing for neighborhood space over the years, Malin says that he’s never experienced any kind of out-and-out turf war. Ice cream truck drivers tend to be a little more passive-aggressive than that. “I have a business permit for Fairfield, so that’s typically where I’m driving,” he says. “But sometimes I might go out of town for an event. Once, a driver pulled up to me and asked if I had a permit. I said ‘No, I’m just here for an hour,’ and he said, ‘OK, I’m calling the cops.’ They try and get the police to get you out [of town].” Fortunately, police typically don’t write up drivers for the infraction.

10. SOME LUCKY CUSTOMERS HAVE AN APP FOR HOME DELIVERY.

An ice cream truck driver.
George Rose/Getty Images

Technology has influenced everything, and ice cream trucks are no exception. Malin uses an app that allows customers to request that he make a special delivery. "People can request I pull up right outside their home," he says. If their parents are home, there’s one additional perk: "I accept credit cards."

This article originally ran in 2018.