10 Things You Might Not Know About Jeff Goldblum

Theo Wargo, Getty Images
Theo Wargo, Getty Images

Unconventionally handsome and equipped with a famously peculiar speaking cadence, actor Jeff Goldblum has been intriguing audiences for decades. As he celebrates his 66th birthday, today might be a good time to catch up on all things Goldblum, from his debut as a street hood in Death Wish to the reason he sometimes poops orange.

1. HE USED TO WRITE AFFIRMATIONS IN THE SHOWER.

Growing up in Pittsburgh—his father was a doctor, his mother a radio broadcaster—Jeff Goldblum kept his desire to be an actor hidden from others, believing he’d be ridiculed for it. To maintain his motivations, he would write affirmations on his glass shower door. “I'd write every morning, because I hadn't told anyone, even my parents or friends, that I wanted to act, it was embarrassing or something, and I knew it was too important to me to have it be anything but a secret,” Goldblum told The Guardian in 2010. “But the door would steam up, I didn't dare keep a diary or anything, and I'd write 'Please God, let me be an actor,' and then, before I left the shower, I would wipe it off." After studying acting as a teen during the summer at Carnegie Mellon University, Goldblum moved to New York and got his big-screen break playing “freak number one” in 1974’s Death Wish.

2. HE TRIED TO HIRE A PROSTITUTE AT THE AGE OF 13.

Evan Agostini, Getty Images

Virile even before he achieved fame, Goldblum told UK television host Graham Norton that he once tried to procure the company of a prostitute at the age of 13. In order to afford the appointment, he stole five dollars from his father’s wallet. “I’d heard about the red light district so I took five dollars from my dad’s wallet and went there,” he said. “I walked back and forth for a while and finally went in and picked a girl. On the way to the bedroom I said, ‘What time is it?’ I looked at my watch and said, ‘I’ve got to go but I will come back.’” He did not return.

3. HE SOLD PENCILS TO PRISONERS.

Before acting paid the bills, Goldblum spent time as a pencil salesman. Speaking to Vanity Fair, Goldblum revealed that his arrival in California was marked by auditions in between the odd gig peddling office supplies to correctional facilities. He quit after falling ill and vowed to stick with his creative pursuits.

4. HE FIRST WENT FULL GOLDBLUM FOR INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS.

Kevin Winter, Getty Images

Goldblum is aware of his distinctive delivery of dialogue—usually a melodic kind of stammering peppered with “uhs” and pregnant pauses—and believes he knows where it came from. Filming a small role in 1978’s Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Goldblum recalled a line in the script (“I never thought they would come in metal ships”) came out as “I-I-I-I never thought they would come in … metal ships.” Director Philip Kaufman liked the take, leading Goldblum to conclude he had found his rhythm. “That’s kind of … I sort of … I think I found something,” he said in 2018.

5. HE HAD EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS WITH HIS BREAKTHROUGH ROLE IN THE FLY.

Released in 1986, The Fly stands as one of the most viscerally-grueling experiences in the horror genre. As scientist Seth Brundle, whose DNA is intermingled with that of an insect, Goldblum articulates a horrifying transformation. Off-camera, he was having problems of his own. His then-girlfriend, Geena Davis, had been cast as Brundle’s love interest and Goldblum had real issues watching her perform in intimate scenes with actor John Getz. At one point, Goldblum was told to leave the set to deal with his reaction privately.

6. THERE WAS OSCAR BUZZ FOR HIS ROLE AS BRUNDLEFLY.

Peter Kramer, Getty Images

Though it went on to become a cult hit, The Fly may have been too disgusting for general audiences to embrace. That still didn’t stop Goldblum’s performance as Seth Brundle from being the recipient of Oscar buzz when the film was eligible for the 1987 Academy Awards. Unfortunately, it didn’t come to pass. Despite critical raves, it was believed the Academy passed up Goldblum because his performance came in the context of a horror film. The actor was candid about his disappointment, telling the Chicago Tribune that “as much as I'm interested in the integrity of the work itself, there is a part of me that is sensitive to criticism, that delights to have any talent I may have acknowledged. I did hope that I would be nominated; I was excited about the possibility; there had been a lot of talk about it, and I was disappointed and hurt in a way.”

7. HE CO-FOUNDED AN ACTING SCHOOL.

Interested in learning the Goldblum method? You may not be able to slip entirely into the actor’s distinctive mannerisms, but you can take lessons endorsed by him. Goldblum co-founded Playhouse West in Los Angeles in 1981 with Robert Carnegie and credits the experience he received there with helping him land a role in 1983’s The Big Chill. Later, Goldblum transitioned to teaching classes based on the principles of acting coach Sanford Meisner. Notable trainees of the class include Jim Carrey, Ashley Judd, and Karate Kid co-star Martin Kove.

8. HIS POOP WAS SOMETIMES ORANGE.

Matthias Nareyek, Getty Images

A self-admitted health nut, Goldblum has remained remarkably well-preserved for a man of 65. He credits clean living and a generally balanced diet, though there have been times he went overboard on the latter. “My first wife and I would bring our juicer on planes, and we’d do a carrot cleanse for a week, until I’d turn orange and all my poop would be orange,” he told GQ in 2017. “Things that I wouldn’t adhere to now. Now I just get a good night’s sleep.”

9. HE LIKES TO BROWSE #JEFFGOLDBLUM ON INSTAGRAM.

Goldblum inspires a lot of creativity online, which the actor himself enjoys curating via Instagram. “I like to look at #jeffgoldblum on Instagram, which my wife makes fun of,” he told GQ in 2017. “And then I take pictures of the things that interest me. There are many paintings and pictures of me, some nice and some very primitive and bad. People get tattoos of my face. This is me in a banana split, where I’m the center of a dessert. People made a balloon out of me … very nipply. Quite nipply.”

10. YOU CAN SEE HIM PLAY JAZZ ALMOST EVERY WEEK.

Rich Fury, Getty Images

Provided you live in Los Angeles. Goldblum is part of an ensemble jazz group, the Mildred Snitzer Orchestra, that meets at Rockwell Table & Stage on a weekly basis. Goldblum is said to enjoy mingling with the crowd and chatting up customers during these semi-regular gatherings. If you can’t make it, the group is due to record an album which will be released by Decca Records in the near future.

Friday’s Best Amazon Deals Include Samsonite Luggage, Smart Notebooks, and Fitbits

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As a recurring feature, our team combs the web and shares some amazing Amazon deals we’ve turned up. Here’s what caught our eye today, December 11. Mental Floss has affiliate relationships with certain retailers, including Amazon, and may receive a small percentage of any sale. But we only get commission on items you buy and don’t return, so we’re only happy if you’re happy. Good luck deal hunting!

The 10 Most Annoying Holiday Songs Ever

Alvin, Simon, and Theodore in Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007).
Alvin, Simon, and Theodore in Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007).
20th Century Fox Home Entertainment

Christmas is a time for joy, thankfulness, love … and, when it comes to Christmas carols, the occasional bout of cringe. There are songs that are perfect, classic, and timeless—like Bing Crosby's "White Christmas" or Mariah Carey's “All I Want for Christmas Is You”—and then there are these 10 holiday horrors.

1. "Dominick the Donkey" // Lou Monte

Reindeer aren't the only animals on Santa's payroll. "When Santa visits his paisans," Italian-American songster Lou Monte tells us, he takes his donkey Dominick along, "because the reindeer cannot climb the hills of Italy." The song was considered a novelty track when it was released in 1960, but the Italian communities of New Jersey (where Monte grew up) loved it. The constant braying throughout the song is grating, though we're sure children find it hilarious.

2. "The Christmas Shoes" // NewSong

"The Christmas Shoes" is more depressing than annoying, which is in itself obnoxious when you're trying to get into the joyfulness and cheer of the holiday season. A mawkish Christmas song about a poor boy who wants to buy a pair of shoes for his sick mother so she'll "look beautiful if [she] meets Jesus tonight"? No thanks. And then there was a made-for-TV movie based on said song? We'd prefer coal in our stockings.

3. "All I Want for Christmas (Is My Two Front Teeth)" // Spike Jones & His City Slickers

Its insta-earworm hook is enough to make this 1940s song a base level of annoying, but its cloying, cutesy lyrics and the lisp that's often incorporated into recordings take "All I Want For Christmas (Is My Two Front Teeth)" to the next level. Your baby teeth will be replaced! That's what teeth do! Ask Santa for a PlayStation!

4. "The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)" // The Chipmunks

"Christmas Don't Be Late" needs no additional explanation as to why it's annoying other than "the Chipmunks sang it." Ross Bagdasarian Sr. wrote the song, which was released in 1958, and it was enormously successful—reaching the top of the Billboard Hot 100 Pop Singles chart and netting three wins at the first annual Grammy Awards. For those keeping score, that's three more Grammys than Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" received.

5. "Wiggly Wiggly Christmas" // The Wiggles

It feels weird to pick on The Wiggles, an Aussie children's group who are supposed to be high-energy and wacky. But if the repeated refrain of "wiggly wiggly Christmas" doesn't make you want to tell your kids that Santa has a cold and cancel the holiday altogether, we're not sure what will.

6. "Do They Know It's Christmas" // Band-Aid

"Do They Know It's Christmas" was written as a response to the Ethiopian famine of the mid-1980s. Singer Bob Geldof, determined to funnel money to a higher cause by way of a charity song, enlisted Bono, Boy George, George Michael, Phil Collins, Sting, and many others to form a supergroup known as Band Aid that would record the vocal track for the song in one marathon 24-hour session. The song was out days later, and—heavily publicized—proceeded to raise tens of millions of dollars for Ethiopian famine relief. Which is all very noble and great. But the song itself is condescending, patronizing, and imperialistic, on top just plain being awful. Geldof himself admitted that he was "responsible for two of the worst songs in history. One is 'Do They Know It's Christmas?' and the other one is 'We Are the World.'"

7. "Gott nytt jul" // Sean Banan

Even if you don't speak Swedish, the obnoxiousness of 2013 Eurovision contestant Sean Banan's "Gott nytt jul" comes through at the seven-second mark with its fart sound effect. If you do speak Swedish, you get the added benefit of Sean telling Santa to "come and bring your ho ho hoes." As for the music video … well, a man in a Santa fat suit twerking is the universal language.

8. "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" // William Hung

Failed American Idol wannabe William Hung, who quickly became famous for his tone-deaf rendition of Ricky Martin's "She Bangs," managed to put out a holiday album. It was called Hung for the Holidays. Even in 2004, the world was a cruel and unusual place.

9. "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas" // Gayla Peevey

Long before the Cincinnati Zoo's Fiona the hippo became an internet celebrity, 10-year-old Gayla Peevey sang a novelty song about wanting a hippopotamus for Christmas. It was an instant hit in 1953, and Peevey even performed it on The Ed Sullivan Show. A promoter decided to do a fundraiser to buy Peevey a hippo (which was promptly donated to her hometown's Oklahoma City Zoo), and Matilda the hippo became a popular OKC resident until she died in 1998. But the song? It's not even accurate. To dissuade her delusional daughter, Peevey sings that her mom said a hippo would eat her up, but then "teacher says the hippo is a vegetarian." Hippos are generally omnivorous, but they do have carnivorous tendencies. We can abide the fantasy of a pet hippo, but not disinformation! 

10. "Shake Up Christmas" // Train

The "Drops of Jupiter" rockers tried to get into the holiday spirit in 2010, but with lyrics that rhyme "smile" with, er, "smile," and "Before I get too old and don't remember it, so let's December it and reassemble it," we want to hide behind the Christmas tree, not rock around it.