Mental Floss

15 Suspicious Packages That Were Definitely Not Explosives

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Reports of suspicious packages are common across the United States. Police take all reports seriously — as they should — and they look into every unmanned briefcase or wayward box. More often than not, abandoned gym bags just wind up being lost gym bags. Here are 15 fairly recent suspicious package reports from alert citizens that became great stories to share at the local precinct.

1. Like a rock
On September 5, a suspicious package in Montana turned out to be a bunch of duct tape around a brick of Styrofoam.

2. Beans, please
Also on September 5, a suspicious package in Utah turned out to be a cardboard tube filled with dried beans.

3. Look at the box. Now back at me.

On August 31, a suspicious package in Pennsylvania turned out to be a cooler with a stick of Old Spice deodorant in it.

4. Rocking out
On August 9, a suspicious package in Massachusetts turned out to be a cassette player and some wires.

5. Kick one back
On August 3, a suspicious package in Tennessee turned out to be four unopened cans of Budweiser.

6. Play it again
Also on August 3, a suspicious package in Maryland turned out to be an accordion.

7. Darkness falls
Also on August 3, a suspicious package in Michigan turned out to be a paper sky lantern.

8. Where's the beef?
On July 30, a suspicious package in Ohio turned out to be a box full of rotten meat.

9. Sit. Stay.
On July 24, a suspicious package in Missouri turned out to be a dog tracking collar charger.

10. Boogie flights
On July 17, a suspicious package in California turned out to be the world's largest penis.

11. A bug's life
On July 12, a suspicious package in Vermont turned out to be some harmless dead bugs.

12. Schrödinger!
Also on July 12, a suspicious package in Alabama turned out to be a cat in a box.

13. Hello, Dolly
On July 2, a suspicious package in Connecticut turned out to be a wooden doll wrapped in duct tape.

14. Match game
On June 26, a suspicious package in Illinois turned out to be smashed matches in an envelope.

15. Thirst first
On June 20, a suspicious package in South Carolina turned out to be a bottle wrapped in tape.