If Momma refuses to let you spend your allowance at the tattoo parlor, maybe you should drop some history, and let her know just how "useful" a tattoo can be.
Tattoos as Telegraphs
The Tattoo: secret messages
The Tattooed: slaves
The Reason: It beats paying for postage
According to Greek Historians, back in 312 BC, Greeks used to shave the hair off their slaves, tattoo a message into the back of their heads, and then wait for the locks to grow back. Once the message was all covered in hair, they'd pack the slave off, and send him running.
a crucifixion scene
troublemakers in the British Navy
To get out of being whipped
There's a reason Eminem and Snoop both suited up for their court appearances. Similarly, British mischief-makers used to get "Jesus on the cross" inked onto their shoulders to make themselves seem like upstanding citizens. That way, if a religious captain was somehow moved by the WWJD message, he might drop the whip in favor of a lesser punishment.
A tribal-looking thing
Mike Tyson's face
To honor the Mayans?
Claiming he was into history, Iron Mike made the unfortunate mistake of telling reporters that his new face tattoo was a Mayan New Zealand symbol. The fact that Mayans aren't really from New Zealand didn't stop his enthusiasm. Of course, history is the least of Mike's concerns. According to Sports Illustrated, the former heavyweight is currently trying to fight women in the ring.
a vagina on the forehead
lusty Indian priests
To make an example of 'em.
If you thought laws were severe in Texas, any priest caught with his trousers down in ancient India got a "little girl" branded into his noggin.
GoldenPalace.Com, also on the forehead
In need of some quick cash, Karolyne Smith did the first thing any enterprising young American would do, and auctioned off her forehead on e-Bay. After 27,000 visits, online casino GoldenPalace.com outbid everyone with a cool $10,000 offer. Each letter on her forehead is an inch high, and the terms are that she has to leave it there permanently. Still, it beats having a vagina on there.