Time for a new feature. 'The Projectionist' will showcase a series of related video clips with commentary and trivia. This first installment was the brainchild of my old roommate Kevin Pell, the pride of Somers, Connecticut. Now set your cellphones to silent and enjoy the feature presentation.
1. Various Artists: "Voices That Care"
Cause: Operation Desert Storm
Biggest Stars: Garth Brooks, Michael Bolton, Kevin Costner, Will Smith
Strangest Stars: Orel Hershiser, Fred Savage, Don King, Mike Tyson
What To Look For: The forced inclusion of half-hearted lip-synchers Magic Johnson and Michael Jordan (at the 1:03 mark); Ted Danson waving in passing, making me question his involvement (3:24); Gary Busey rocking (3:35); a barely recognizable Alyssa Milano (3:43); The Fonz and Hershiser (4:11); Iron Mike's sweater (4:33)
2. USA for Africa: "We Are The World"
Cause: Famine in Ethiopia
Biggest Stars: Michael Jackson, Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder
Strangest Stars: Randy Jackson, Tito Jackson, Marlon Jackson, LaToya Jackson, Dan Aykroyd
What To Look For: Billy Joel looking confused (1:05); Michael Jackson's socks (1:18); Michael Jackson's glove (1:19); The Springsteen Face (2:14); LaToya (5:48); Aykroyd (multiple times)
3. Band Aid: "Do They Know Its Christmas?"
Cause: Famine in Ethiopia
Big Stars: Bono, Phil Collins, Sting, Boy George
Bigger Stars Who Appeared Only On The B-Side: Paul McCartney, David Bowie, Annie Lennox
What To Look For: A sweet Duran Duran sweatshirt (2:03); Young Sting looks a lot like Dr. Chase on House (2:43); intense maracas (3:31)
4. Northern Lights: "Tears Are Not Enough"
Cause: Famine in Ethiopia/Canadian Pride
Biggest Stars: Neil Young, Bryan Adams, Gordon Lightfoot, Geddy Lee
Strangest Stars: John Candy, Paul Schaffer, Wayne Gretzky and other Campbell Conference All-Stars
What To Look For: A better quality video, which you can find here (sorry, embedding was disabled)
5. Hear n' Aid: "Stars"
Cause: Famine in Ethiopia/The Perception of Heavy Metal Stars
Biggest Stars: Blue Oyster Cult, Dio, Quiet Riot, Queensryche,
Backup Vocalists You'll Know: Vince Neil, Ted Nugent, Yngwie Malmsteen
What To Look For: A great idea for an obscure nostalgic t-shirt (0:42); Quiz: Groupies or Heavy Metal Studs? (2:04); Another Quiz: That's not Ron Jeremy, is it? (5:36); a fantastic photo montage (6:20 to end)
6. Old Aid: "We Are The Old"
Cause: Aging Rock Stars
Biggest Stars: John Sebastian (The Lovin' Spoonful), Peter Noone (Herman's Hermits), Mark Lindsay (Paul Revere and the Raiders), Robbie Krieger (The Doors), Richie Havens and Spencer Davis.
Strangest Star: "Axel" Bundy
What To Look For: Axel playing his sandwich (1:40); actual feelings of sympathy for the aging rockers (throughout)