The Slow 10: 10 Really Slow Things


It's always the Quick 10, isn't it? Well, it's Friday, and I think I'm developing an immunity to caffeine, because I'm not moving very quick today. To complement my mood, we're going to look at slow things for the Q10"¦ or the "S10," as the case may be.

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3. Slowest Car in the World: According to a May report from Motor Trend, it's the Smart ForTwo, which takes 14.70 seconds to go from 0 to 60 miles per hour.

4. Slowest Concert in the World: Written by composer John Cage, the organ piece started on September 5, 2001, and will end 639 years later. The next sound change is scheduled for July 5, 2012.

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7. The Slowest Mouse in all Mexico: the aptly named Slowpoke Rodriguez. He's Speedy Gonzales' cousin, and while he may be slow in movement, he makes it a point to mention that he's not slow en la cabeza. Here he is in action:

8. Slowest Marathon Time Ever: 54 years, eight months, six days, eight hours, 32 minutes and 20.3 seconds. In 1912, an Olympic marathoner from Japan just disappeared right in the middle of the race. Supposedly he stopped to get a drink at an outdoor party and ended up staying longer than he meant to. Once he realized how long he had spent, he was too embarrassed to finish the marathon, and quietly went back to his hotel and left for Japan the next day. In 1966, he finally returned to finish the run he started.

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10. The Mammal with the Slowest Heartbeat: the blue whale, which has a heartbeat of only four to eight beats per minute, depending on whether it's diving or not.

And here's one I can't verify but I thought was interesting nonetheless "“ the slowest song to ever move up the Billboard Hot 100 Charts and finally reach #1 is supposedly Chuck Berry's "My Ding-a-Ling." He recorded it on February 3, 1972, and it didn't reach #1 until October 21 of the same year. My Spidey Senses tell me that there must be a single that took longer than that to chart and then hit #1, but I can't find it. If anyone knows, I bet you _flossers do!