Watch Steve Ballmer Promote Windows 1.0

YouTube / Cruchaga
YouTube / Cruchaga / YouTube / Cruchaga

Microsoft Windows 1.0 was released way back in November 1985. It wasn't great -- I know, because I ran it on my (totally underpowered) home PC with monochrome graphics. On the other hand, it had a clock. A graphical clock. That was the main cool thing about Windows 1.0.

So Steve Ballmer made this amazing commercial to advertise the thing. How much would you expect to pay? How much would you expect to...wait, I have to send money to a PO Box in Redmond?! Anyway, take a minute out of your day and just bask in this beautifully nutty gag infomercial:

Yes, it has Reversi! Ballmer served as CEO of Microsoft from 2000 to 2014; he has also chilled out a little with age. But just a little. (Skip to 2:57 in the linked video for a similarly awesome Windows XP ad.)

Microsoft's Windows History page explains Windows 1.0's amazing features:

There are drop-down menus, scroll bars, icons, and dialog boxes that make programs easier to learn and use. You're able to switch among several programs without having to quit and restart each one. Windows 1.0 ships with several programs, including MS‑DOS file management, Paint, Windows Writer, Notepad, Calculator, and a calendar, card file, and clock to help you manage day-to-day activities. There’s even a game—Reversi. Geek trivia: Remember floppy disks and kilobytes? Windows 1.0 requires a minimum of 256 kilobytes (KB), two double-sided floppy disk drives, and a graphics adapter card. A hard disk and 512 KB memory is recommended for running multiple programs or when using DOS 3.0 or higher.

Update: Many have asked what's up with the "except in Nebraska" bit at the end: Quora has the answer.