Do anything incredible this year? If your resolution at the start of 2014 was to become the world's fastest texter or to perform the farthest jump while driving a big rig, you should know that the bar has been raised by some intrepid over-achievers. Oh, and you only have two weeks to catch up. Here are 15 crazy world records from '14.
1. Heaviest Firework
How Heavy?: 464.826 kilograms (1,024.76 pounds). Its rosette's diameter was about 800 meters.
Where?: The 13th annual Kounosu Fireworks Festival in Japan's Saitama Prefecture.
When?: October 11.
What Did It Sound Like?: BOOM!
2. Fastest Texter
Who?: 17-year-old Marcel Fernandes Filho.
How Fast? On November 7, Filho typed this sentence in 17 seconds flat: “The razor-toothed piranhas of the genera Serrasalmus and Pygocentrus are the most ferocious freshwater fish in the world. In reality they seldom attack a human.” He easily beat his own previous world records of 18.19 seconds and 18.44 seconds.
Auto-Correct Needed?: No ducking way.
3. Most donuts around a car that is driving on two wheels in one minute
How Many Donuts?: Ten donuts.
Who?: Zhang Shengjun did the donuts in a BMW M4 Coupe around a MINI Cooper being driven on two wheels by Han Yue.
When?: November 25.
Why?: Look at those donuts!
4. Longest journey in Minecraft
Who?: Kurt J. Mac.
How Far?: On March 6, Mac found that he had traveled 1,479,940 blocks from the center of Minecraft, or around 1,479.9 virtual kilometers. (If he wanted to get to the end of the Minecraft world, he'd have to keep going for another 22 years.)
When Did the Journey Start?: March 28, 2011
Equipment Brought: A sword, pickaxe, and compass—"That way, I would know that, as long as I walk in the direction opposite the needle’s point, I am headed in the right direction."
5. Biggest Pillow Fight
How Big?: 4,201 people.
Where?: Brookings, South Dakota, at a South Dakota State-South Dakota football game in Coughlin–Alumni Stadium.
Was Joey Fatone There?: Yes.
6. Most Lights on a Residential Property
How Many Lights?: 601,736 lights.
Who?: The Gay family of LaGrangeville, New York.
Time Spent Programming The Lights to Synchronize With Coldplay's "A Sky Full of Stars": 35 hours.
7. Longest Big-Rig Jump
How Long?: 83 feet, seven inches (while jumping over a Formula 1 car).
Who?: Mike Ryan drove the truck, Martin Ivanov was behind the wheel of the F1.
Margin For Error: Small.
8. Fastest Backhoe
How Fast?: 72.59 mph (116.82 km per hour).
Where?: Bathurst Airport in New South Wales, Australia.
Who Drove the Heavy Machinery?: Matthew Lucas.
When?: October 21.
9. Longest Backwards Basketball Shot
How Long?: 82 feet, 2 inches.
Where?: US Airways Center, Phoenix.
Who?: Harlem Globetrotters star Thunder Law.
Points Worth: 3.
10. LONGEST FASHION SHOW
How Long?: 24 hours and 28 seconds, or roughly 0.143 Fashion Weeks (as defined by Newton).
Where?: Miami Beach
11. Fastest 100m on All Fours (Human)
How Fast?: 15.86 seconds.
Where?: Komazawa Olympic Park Athletic Field, Tokyo.
Who?: Katsumi Tamakoshi.
Seconds Slower Than Usain Bolt's Two-Legged Record: 6.288.
12. Fastest 10m on hind legs (Dog) / Fastest 5m on front paws (Dog)
How Fast?: 6.56 seconds (10 meters, hind legs), 7.76 seconds (5 meters, front paws).
Who?: Jiff the Pomeranian.
Who's a Good Dog?: He is.
13. Tightest Parallel Park via Drift
Who?: Han Yue broke the record at Chongqing Olympic Park.
How Tight?: The space was eight centimeters longer than Yue's car (a Mini hatchback).
14. Longest Tongue
Who?: Nick Stoeberl.
How Long?: 10.1 centimeters long from its tip to the middle of his top lip.
Downside: "I have to spend longer brushing my tongue in the morning.”
15. Fastest Typing On a Keyboard Using One's Nose
Who?: Khursheed Hussain
How Fast?: Hussain typed, "Guinness world records have challenged me to type this sentence using my nose in the fastest time" in 47.44 seconds.
Where?: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh, India.
What Does a Keyboard Smell Like? Victory.