Need a Smart Comeback? This Literary Insult Chart Will Help

If you’ve ever struggled to produce a comeback in the middle of a heated argument, this chart ($25 on Amazon) of literary insults is for you. With a glance at this 18-inch-by-24-inch poster, you can find one of more than 70 quotes from famous literary figures to throw at your enemies.

The chart is organized into different categories based on insult type. Want to insult someone’s cooking? Try a quote from novelist Margaret Storm Jameson—"She did not so much cook as assassinate food." Want something straightforward? Try a line from Shakespeare, who wrote, "I think thou art an ass." And if you really want to dig into someone, you can use poet Heinrich Heine's famed takedown, "Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid."

If you’re looking for even more ways to avoid a dreaded case of l’esprit de l’escalier, check out this list of 12 old-fashioned insults we should totally bring back.

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