19 Old-Timey Ways to Call B.S.

iStock // Lucy Quintanilla
iStock // Lucy Quintanilla

If you've been using the B.S. word a lot lately, it might be time to change things up. Look no further: We’ve partnered with the editors of the Dictionary of American Regional English (DARE) to bring you 19 old-timey ways to call B.S. from all over the United States.

1. FIDDLE ON A BROOMSTICK

Need to cry nonsense in Vermont? You could one-up fiddlesticks by saying, “Fiddle on a broomstick!” You could also say fiddle up a gum tree.

2. FAIRYDIDDLE

This Nebraska term is a variation of taradiddle, according to DARE, and might be influenced by “fairy tale.” Taradiddle meaning a lie or fib originated around 1796, according to the Oxford English Dictionary (OED), and by 1970 also meant pretentious or empty talk.

3. FAHDOODLE

Another variation on an older word. Fa’doodle is British English from about 1670, according to the OED, while fahdoodle was recorded in New York as of the 1870s. Also related is the 19th century flapdoodle.

4. MALOLLY

“That’s a load of malolly!” you could say when you think somebody is full of it. Used in Georgia and Indiana. Variations include malollypop and molly.

5. GURRY

Other meanings for this Maryland saying for rubbish or nonsense include “diarrhea” from 16th century British English and “fish offal” from 19th century U.S. whaling lingo, according to the OED.

6. BULL DURHAM

This New York City euphemism is also a brand of tobacco. Other bullish yet delicate ways of saying B.S. include bullfeathers in Arkansas and bullcorn in Texas.

7. BUSHWA

This rather old-fashioned Northern term originated around 1920, says the OED. DARE says this probable euphemism for B.S. may also be influenced by the Canadian-French bois de vache, “buffalo dung,” or bois de cheval, “horse dung.”

8. AND 9. DONKEY DUST AND HEIFER DUST

Dust is a polite way of saying “manure.” Hence, donkey and heifer dust are literally manure from a donkey and heifer, and figuratively ways of saying bullshit without saying it. Donkey dust is a Massachusetts native while heifer dust is from the Ozarks.

10. BOTTLEWASH

Instead of “Hogwash!” you can also say, “Bottlewash!” What exactly is hogwash? The OED says it first referred to kitchen scraps used to feed pigs, then to any low quality alcohol, and then to something nonsensical or ridiculous.

11. APPLESAUCE

Applesauce became more than sauce from apples in the 1920s, says DARE, and may also refer to insincere flattery and lies, according to the OED. The term is attributed to Thomas Aloysius Dorgan, a cartoonist, sports writer, and inventor of slan­­­g whose phrases appeared in newspapers "at home and (in translation) abroad."

12. BALOOEY

Balooey!” a Texan might say if they think you’ve said something untrue. This nonsense word is a blend of baloney and hooey. Baloney meaning humbug or nonsense is from about 1928, says the OED, while hooey is from 1924.

13. BOSH

Chiefly used in the South, South Midland, and Northeast, bosh first appeared in English in the 19th century. It comes from the Turkish word bosh, meaning empty or worthless, which entered English because of its use in a popular novel at the time, Ayesha, the Maid of Kars by British writer and diplomat James Justinian Morier.

14. CUSH

Faced with nonsense in Virginia? “That’s a lot of cush,” you could say. DARE says this idiom for nonsense or rubbish might be related to cush, meaning a southern dish made with cornmeal or cornbread that can be sweet or savory.

15. FUSH

Head up to New England and instead of cush, you’d say fush for “nonsense.” To be even more colorful, you could say, “Fush to Bungtown!”

16. FLABBERDEGAZ

If someone from the Northwest says you’re full of flabberdegaz, watch out: They’re saying you’re full of “vain imaginings in speech,” says DARE. The word is probably related to flabbergast, to confuse or confound, and perhaps flabberdegasky, a 19th-century nonce word.

17. FLUMMADIDDLE

Flummadiddle, in addition to nonsense and foolishness, refers to a New England concoction of “stale bread, pork fat, molasses, water, cinnamon, allspice, and cloves,” says DARE. It's a “kind of mush, baked in the oven."

18. FLAPDOODLE

Speaking of weird food, flapdoodle (also spelled flapdaddle) is “an imaginary food of fools,” says DARE, as well as a term for “nonsense.” From The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain: “He gets up ... and slobbers out a speech, all full of tears and flapdoodle.”

19. FLUBDUB

Flub-a-dub-dub, balderdash in a tub. This word for bombastic or inept language has been used in U.S. English since at least 1888, according to the OED.

What's the Difference Between Stuffing and Dressing?

iStock
iStock

For carbohydrate lovers, nothing completes a Thanksgiving meal quite like stuffing—shovelfuls of bread, celery, mushrooms, and other ingredients that complement all of that turkey protein.

Some people don’t say stuffing, though. They say dressing. In these calamitous times, knowing how to properly refer to the giant glob of insulin-spiking bread seems necessary. So what's the difference?

Let’s dismiss one theory off the bat: Dressing and stuffing do not correlate with how the side dish is prepared. A turkey can be stuffed with dressing, and stuffing can be served in a casserole dish. Whether it’s ever seen the inside of a bird is irrelevant, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong and should be met with suspicion, if not outright derision.

The terms are actually separated due to regional dialects. Dressing seems to be the favored descriptor for southern states like Mississippi, Tennessee, South Carolina, and Georgia, while stuffing is preferred by Maine, New York, and other northern areas. (Some parts of Pennsylvania call it filling, which is a bit too on the nose, but to each their own.)

If stuffing stemmed from the common practice of filling a turkey with carbs, why the division? According to HuffPost, it may have been because Southerners considered the word stuffing impolite, and therefore never embraced it.

While you should experience no material difference in asking for stuffing or dressing, when visiting relatives it might be helpful to keep to their regionally-preferred word to avoid confusion. Enjoy stuffing yourselves.

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What’s the Difference Between Forests, Woods, and Jungles?

Jui-Chi Chan/iStock via Getty Images
Jui-Chi Chan/iStock via Getty Images

If you're an English speaker, there’s a good chance you often use the words woods, forest, and jungle correctly without even thinking about it. Even if a patch of trees takes up a significant portion of your backyard, you probably wouldn’t consider it a forest; and you wouldn’t talk about the beautiful fall foliage in New England’s jungles. Based on those examples, it seems like woods are smaller than forests, and jungles aren’t found in colder climates. This isn’t wrong—but there's more to it than that.

According to Merriam-Webster, a forest is “a dense growth of trees and underbrush covering a large tract,” while woods are “a dense growth of trees usually greater in extent than a grove and smaller than a forest.” The reason we consider forests to be larger than woods dates back to the Norman rule of Great Britain in 1066, when a forest was a plot of land owned by the Crown that was large enough to accommodate game for royal hunting parties. Whether that land contained trees or not was essentially irrelevant.

These days, scientists and land managers definitely consider the presence of trees necessary for land to be classified as a forest. To set it apart from woods, or woodland, it usually has to meet certain density qualifications, which are different depending on whom you ask.

According to the UN Food and Agricultural Organization (FAO), a forest must cover about 1.24 acres of land, and its canopy cover—the amount of land covered by the treetops—must exceed 10 percent of the acreage [PDF]. “Other wooded land” must also span about 1.24 acres, but its canopy cover is between 5 and 10 percent. In a nutshell, the FAO thinks forests and woods are the same size, but forests are more dense than woods. Australia, on the other hand, employs plant ecologist Raymond Specht’s classification system for its vegetation, in which any tree-populated land with less than 30 percent canopy cover is a woodland, and anything more dense than that is a forest.

Unlike forests, jungles don’t have specific scientific classifications, because the word jungle isn’t really used by scientists. According to Sciencing, it’s a colloquial term that usually denotes what scientists refer to as tropical forests.

Tropical forests are located around the Equator and have the highest species diversity per area in the world. Since they’re so densely populated with flora and fauna, it makes sense that both Merriam-Webster and the Encyclopedia Britannica describe jungles as “tangled” and “impenetrable.” They’re bursting with millions of plants and animals that are different from what we see in temperate and boreal forests to the north.

Because most of us aren’t in the habit of clarifying which type of forest we’re talking about in casual conversation, it’s no surprise that we often refer to the temperate forests we see in our own climate simply as forests, which we differentiate from those rich, overgrown tropical territories to the south by calling them jungles.

To summarize, forests are historically and colloquially considered to be larger than woods, and scientifically considered to be more dense. Jungles are technically forests, too, since jungle is a casual word for what scientists call a tropical forest.

And, all differences aside, it’s relaxing to spend time in any of them—here are 11 scientific reasons why that’s true.

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