11 Secrets of Life Coaches

iStock.com/Steve Debenport
iStock.com/Steve Debenport

There are an estimated 53,300 life coaches across the globe, and nearly 17,500 of those can be found in North America [PDF]. These experts help clients set goals in every realm of life—from health to romance to career—and create a strategy to meet those goals, all the while maintaining a cheery, motivational disposition. While there’s some debate about how legit a practice life coaching is (one recent lawsuit accuses a life coaching business in Colorado of running a lucrative Ponzi scheme), there’s no doubt business is booming. One study found that total annual industry revenue was $2 billion and climbing. We talked to a few professional coaches about their jobs and what they’ve learned about human nature during their tenure.

1. There’s no certification.

A businesswoman hanging a framed certificate
iStock.com/XiXinXing

Interested in becoming a life coach? You’re in luck: There is no regulated certification process to complete before you can put “life coach” on your business cards.

“It’s not regulated by any governing body,” says coach Jay Cataldo. “There’s plenty of people with credentials that have no business coaching anyone and there are people with no credentials that are great coaches. I’m certified by the fact that I am an IACT certified Master Hypnosis Trainer. I tell my clients I have 10 certificates on the wall but they mean nothing. All that matters is can I help you?”

But there are hundreds of training programs that promise to teach the essentials, and at least one accrediting body, the International Coach Federation, maintains a list of what it considers more legitimate training programs. The federation also offers its own credential paths, with a minimum of 60 hours of training and 100 hours of coaching to become an Associate Certified Coach.

Some coaches get certified to add a layer of credibility to their resume, but many consider the school of hard knocks to be the best education.

“I just feel like I’ve had a lot of life, you know?” says life coach Stefanie Ziev, who studied spiritual psychology before discovering the accredited coaching program she completed. “In an effort to decipher the meaning of my life, I’ve done a lot of work.”

2. “Powerful questions” are key.

According to Ziev, one solid coaching method is “listening and asking powerful questions.” By that she means open-ended questions that can’t be answered with a simple “yes” or “no.” “For instance, ‘What would be a stretch goal for you? What would bring you out of your comfort zone that might push you to the next level as it relates to what you want to achieve in your life?’”

3. Don’t call them therapists.

Ziev is quick to establish that coaching and therapy are very different services. “Coaching looks forward and therapy looks back,” she says. “Coaching is not as worried about your mommy or daddy issues as it is about what’s happening now and what do you want next?”

If a client is depressed or wallowing in the past, Ziev says she’ll refer them to a therapist. “I’m like look, I can’t help you.”

The way Cataldo puts it, coaching requires a lot more hands-on work on behalf of the client than therapy. “You have to want this more than I want it for you,” he says. “You gotta push yourself, put yourself in uncomfortable situations. I’m not gonna waste my time with someone who isn’t gonna put the work in.”

4. They can afford to turn people down.

A yes or no neon sign
iStock.com/sarawuth702

Life coaches can be picky about who they choose to take on as a client. Usually the process begins with a questionnaire or an introductory session in which the coach asks a series of questions that tell them something about a prospective client’s personality and chances for success.

“Listen, a victim, someone who lives comfortably in their victim consciousness, is not a coaching client,” says Ziev. “I don’t deal with people who wallow in their problems.”

Annie Lin, a life coach in New York, estimates that she turns down roughly 15 percent of people who approach her, usually because they have a pessimistic attitude. “I prefer to work with clients who really believe in themselves and outside help would add support, accountability, and guidance to that,” she says. “That’s a much better match.”

5. Coaches have their own coaches.

“Any good coach should have a coach,” says Ziev. “I’m a client for sure.”

Cataldo says he’s had four or five different hypnosis mentors and a health coach. “You can’t really be a good coach unless you’ve gone through the coaching process yourself,” he says.

6. Their clients are in it for the long haul.

Most coaches don’t let clients just drop in for a session here and there. Instead, their services come in big packages, so clients have to make a time commitment. “I won’t work with anyone for less than three months,” says Cataldo. “Once a week for at least three months. Some people, I can literally change their life in three or four months. Other people need more time. I’ve had clients for almost six years.”

7. They don’t have to be in the same room as you.

A smiling woman seated on a couch using a tablet
iStock.com/Eva-Katalin

In fact, e-coaching is huge, and it means coaches aren’t limited by geography. At any given time, Ziev is managing roughly 20 clients, and all the coaching takes place over the phone or Skype.

“A lot of coaches have built a practice around Skype sessions,” says Cataldo. “The technology is so fantastic these days it’s like you’re literally in the room with the person.”

8. Going to a bar can be homework.

Cataldo and other coaches often give their clients assignments to do between sessions. This “homework” is meant to help clients reach their goals. “Usually homework is all predicated on what’s the smallest thing you can do to move towards your goal while also learning what you’re not supposed to do,” says Cataldo. “The best way to do that is to make lots of mistakes. So let’s say I’m working with a guy with social anxiety issues. Homework might just be go to a bar after work and just stand there. Do that for five days in a row. The week after that might be just randomly approaching three people and say[ing], ‘Cheers, how’s your night going?’ Then walk away.”

9. They see the same issues over and over.

While each client is unique, coaches say there are a handful of weaknesses we all have in common. “Most of us do not know how to experience the negative feelings,” says Lin. “We either avoid them, resist them, or over-react to them. It’s only when we have learned to experience and process the negative flows, [that] we’ll be ready to think differently and take different kind[s] of action to generate different results.”

According to Cataldo, we’re also incredibly insecure. “People truly believe deep down they don’t measure up and are not as good as everyone else,” he says. “They don’t believe they’re worthy of love. Also, people believe their negative thoughts are true and not just a bunch of random gibberish. Every single person I’ve come across suffers from this.”

10. But sometimes men and women have different coaching needs.

“I would say that in general, men have a higher need of feeling significant/independent while women need to feel love and connection,” says Lin, though she stresses this is an oversimplification. “When it comes to relationships, many of my male clients need help to better tap into their masculinity (feeling more confident and comfortable with their desires) while my high-achieving female clients need to allow their femininity to come forth (thus becoming more laid-back and trusting, instead of controlling). But differences are mostly of individual nature and not necessarily gender-driven.”

11. Facebook has been good for business.

A finger deleting the Facebook app from a smartphone
iStock.com/amesy

Social media’s suffocating effects on our mental health and self-esteem have been well-documented, and may drive some people into the arms of a life coach.

“Facebook and Instagram aren’t real,” says Cataldo. “Everyone seems so much cooler and funnier and wittier, but it’s all an illusion.” He and other coaches sometimes recommend clients leave social media entirely. “I do occasionally advise clients to take the Facebook app off their phone,” says Lin. “It’s a constant barrage of information you don’t need and it appears to be useful but really it makes us feel more alienated.”

A version of this story ran in 2016.

This Smart Accessory Converts Your Instant Pot Into an Air Fryer

Amazon
Amazon

If you can make a recipe in a slow cooker, Dutch oven, or rice cooker, you can likely adapt it for an Instant Pot. Now, this all-in-one cooker can be converted into an air fryer with one handy accessory.

This Instant Pot air fryer lid—currently available on Amazon for $80—adds six new cooking functions to your 6-quart Instant Pot. You can select the air fry setting to get food hot and crispy fast, using as little as 2 tablespoons of oil. Other options include roast, bake, broil, dehydrate, and reheat.

Many dishes you would prepare in the oven or on the stovetop can be made in your Instant Pot when you switch out the lids. Chicken wings, French fries, and onion rings are just a few of the possibilities mentioned in the product description. And if you're used to frying being a hot, arduous process, this lid works without consuming a ton of energy or heating up your kitchen.

The lid comes with a multi-level air fry basket, a broiling and dehydrating tray, and a protective pad and storage cover. Check it out on Amazon.

For more clever ways to use your Instant Pot, take a look at these recipes.

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10 Secrets of Ice Cream Truck Drivers

asiafoto/iStock via Getty Images Plus
asiafoto/iStock via Getty Images Plus

Ever since Good Humor founder Harry Burt dispatched the first jingling ice cream trucks in Youngstown, Ohio, in 1920, kids and adults alike have had a primal reaction to the sight of a vehicle equipped with a cold, sugary payload. Today, ice cream trucks spend May through October hoping to entice customers into making an impulse beat-the-heat purchase. To get a better idea of what goes into making ice cream a portable business, Mental Floss spoke with several proprietors for their take on everything from ideal weather conditions to police encounters. Here’s the inside scoop.

1. IT CAN GET TOO HOT FOR BUSINESS.

The most common misconception about the ice cream truck business? That soaring temperatures mean soaring profits. According to Jim Malin, owner of Jim’s Ice Cream Truck in Fairfield, Connecticut, record highs can mean decreased profits. “When it’s really hot, like 90 or 100 degrees out, sales go way down,” Malin says. “People aren’t outside. They’re indoors with air conditioning.” And like a lot of trucks, Malin’s isn’t equipped with air conditioning. “I’m suffering and sales are suffering." The ideal temperature? "A 75-degree day is perfect.”

2. THEY DON’T JUST WANDER NEIGHBORHOODS ANYMORE.

An ice cream truck sits parked in a public spot
Chunky Dunks

The days of driving a few miles an hour down a residential street hoping for a hungry clientele have fallen by the wayside. Many vendors, including Malin, make up half or more of their business by arranging for scheduled stops at events like weddings, employee picnics, or school functions. “We do birthday parties, church festivals, sometimes block parties,” he says. Customers can pay in advance, meaning that all guests have to do is order from the menu.

3. SOME OF THEM DRIVE A MINIBUS INSTEAD OF A TRUCK.

For sheer ice cream horsepower, nothing beats a minibus. Laci Byerly, owner of Doodlebop’s Ice Cream Emporium in Jacksonville, Florida, uses an airport-style shuttle for her inventory. “Instead of one or two freezers, we can fit three,” she says. More importantly, the extra space means she doesn’t have to spend the day hunched over. “We can stand straight up.”

4. THEY HAVE A SECRET STASH OF ICE CREAM TO GIVE AWAY TO SPECIAL CUSTOMERS.

A picture of an ice cream truck menu.
Sarah Silbiger/Getty Images

The goal of any truck is to sell enough ice cream to justify the time and expense of operation, so freebies don’t make much sense—unless the truck happens to have some damaged goods. Malin says that it’s common for some pre-packaged bars to be broken inside wrappers, rendering them unattractive for sale. He sets these bars aside for kids who know the score. “I put them in a little box for kids who come up and ask if I have damaged ice cream,” he says. “Certain kids know I have it, and I’m happy to give it to them.”

5. THEY’RE CREATING CUSTOM ICE CREAM MENUS.

An ice cream nacho platter is shown
Chunky Dunks

While pre-packaged Popsicles and ice cream sandwiches remain perennial sellers, a number of trucks are mixing up business by offering one-of-a-kind treats. At the Chunky Dunks truck in Madison, Mississippi, owner Will Lamkin serves up Ice Cream Nachos, a signature dish that outsells anything made by Nestle. “It’s cinnamon sugar chips with your choice of ice cream,” he says. “You get whipped cream, too. And for the ‘cheese,’ it’s a caramel-chocolate sauce.” The nachos work because they’re “streetable,” Lamkin’s label for something people can carry while walking. “The next seven or eight people in line see it, and then everyone’s ordering it.”

6. THEY DON’T ALWAYS PLAY THE ICONIC JINGLE.

Before most people see an ice cream truck, they hear that familiar tinny tune. While some operators still rely on it for its familiarity, Malin and others prefer more modern tracks. “Normally we play ‘80s rock,” he says. “Or whatever we feel like playing that day. We rock it out.”

7. POP CULTURE CHARACTERS ARE SOME OF THEIR BEST SELLERS.

A Captain America ice cream treat
Doodlebop's

While adult customers tend to favor ice cream treats they remember from their youth, kids who don’t really recognize nostalgia tend to like items emblazoned with the likenesses and trademarks of licensed characters currently occupying their TV screens and local theaters. “Characters are the most popular with kids,” Byerly says. “SpongeBob, Minions, and Captain America.”

8. THEY KEEP DOG FOOD HANDY.

At Doodlebop’s, Byerly has a strategy for luring customers with pets: She keeps dog treats on hand. “The dog will sometimes get to us before the owner does,” she says. “If the dog comes up to the truck, he’ll get a Milkbone.” That often leads to a human companion purchasing a treat for themselves.

9. SOMETIMES RIVALS WILL CALL THE COPS.

Though there have been stories of rogue ice cream vendors aggressively competing for neighborhood space over the years, Malin says that he’s never experienced any kind of out-and-out turf war. Ice cream truck drivers tend to be a little more passive-aggressive than that. “I have a business permit for Fairfield, so that’s typically where I’m driving,” he says. “But sometimes I might go out of town for an event. Once, a driver pulled up to me and asked if I had a permit. I said ‘No, I’m just here for an hour,’ and he said, ‘OK, I’m calling the cops.’ They try and get the police to get you out [of town].” Fortunately, police typically don’t write up drivers for the infraction.

10. SOME LUCKY CUSTOMERS HAVE AN APP FOR HOME DELIVERY.

An ice cream truck driver.
George Rose/Getty Images

Technology has influenced everything, and ice cream trucks are no exception. Malin uses an app that allows customers to request that he make a special delivery. "People can request I pull up right outside their home," he says. If their parents are home, there’s one additional perk: "I accept credit cards."

This article originally ran in 2018.