The Internet was abuzz with tornadoes last night. Sharks. Tornadoes. Sharks and tornadoes. Look, when Damon Lindelof and Wil Wheaton are live-tweeting your made-for-TV movie, you know you’ve got a hit on your hands. What people may not realize is that this is just one in a long line of awesomely terrible SyFy movies. If Sharknado was your jam, here are 10 other fantastic movies to check out.
1. Mansquito, AKA Mosquitoman
A convicted murderer who is part of a medical testing program ends up getting injected with a virus that turns him into - yes - half man, half mosquito. As you can imagine, this does not mean good things for society. But it does mean good things for your viewing pleasure. Bonus: Since the movie stars Corin Nemec, you’ll get to find out if Parker Lewis finally loses.
2. Sharktopus
In a feat of living taxidermy not seen since Victor Frankenstein started tooling around in his lab, the U.S. Navy stitches together a shark and an octopus for military purposes. They quickly find they can’t control the beast (Have you ever tried to control a sharktopus? So many legs. So many teeth.) and it, of course, turns on them. Starring Eric Roberts and erstwhile beauty queen Shandi Finnessey.
3. Piranhaconda
I know you read the description of Sharktopus and thought, “But wait, was there a sequel?” The answer is YES. But it really has nothing to do with Sharks or Octopi. What it does involve is two piranhaconda parents that are furious with a scientist who stole their egg. Many people are eaten. I’ll let you guess if stars Michael Madsen and Rachel Hunter survive the wrath of the piranhacondas. There’s also Shandi Finnessey.
4. Fire Serpent
Ever wonder what Nicholas Brendon did once Buffy wrapped? The answer: Fire Serpent, in which a solar flare sends an alien made of fire to destroy the Earth. Sound vaguely like a rejected Star Trek plot? That’s probably because William Shatner wrote it.
5. Aztec Rex
Sharknado is not Ian Ziering’s first SyFy rodeo, oh no. He also starred in this 2008 movie. I’ll let it speak for itself:
6. Chupacabra vs. The Alamo
Erik Estrada must defend Texas from a band of Chupacabras who are using a tunnel to get from Mexico to the U.S.
7. Ice Spiders
Patrick Muldoon, who you may remember as Jeff, the jerk who was responsible for the devastating Zack and Kelly breakup on Saved by the Bell, plays a retired Olympic skier who now works at a Utah ski resort. On the other side of the mountain, a bunch of scientists are working on a new breed of spiders. As tends to happen, the experiment goes terribly awry. I don’t want to spoil too much, but I will tell you that one of the ice spiders is killed when it’s impaled on the antlers of a mounted deer head.
8. Mega Python vs. Gatoroid
Animal rights activist Debbie Gibson frees some exotic pythons into the Everglades, where Park Ranger Tiffany has been feeding steroids to alligators. You know this is going to end awesomely, right?
9. Anonymous Rex
Not only did dinosaurs survive, they still walk among us. As humans. Using holograms to disguise themselves. Starring Sam Trammell from True Blood as a velociraptor and Daniel Baldwin as a triceratops. Also, there’s Faye Dunaway and Isaac Hayes.
10. Dinoshark
A sequel to the 2004 movie Dinocroc, Dinoshark terrorizes tourists in Puerto Vallarta. Do I sense a mashup on the horizon? Dinosharknado, anyone?? Call me, SyFy.